by Cari Quinn
“Kiss your Nick for me. He’s amazing.”
“Happy to.” She flashes me a love-struck smile. “You know, for such a great guy, Blaine sure is stupid when it comes to women.”
I think the same thing.
Chapter Thirty-Four
“Girls night out tomorrow, you in?” I read the group text from Tara. I knew it was coming. Blaine told me Kaleb had broken up with her. I know Tara well enough to understand her ego is bruised and she needs a bar full of men drooling over her to ease the pain.
I text Megan. “I’ll go if you do. :)” We both know what a night with Tara involves. It’s fun, but it’s better with a sidekick to help deal with the wake.
“Deal. Wheee! We get to dance.”
Yes, we do. There is a club in town called The Fish Bowl. The owner of the space is a genius. He has a restaurant and bar area with pool tables in one section and then across a small atrium is the dance club. Girls want to dance all night while the guys they are with may not. The way it’s set up, a guy can walk across to the pool tables when he needs a break.
I haven’t danced much since moving here. I text the group, “I’m in. Dress and heels required?” I’m being selfish. Tara has the sexiest body I know. Mine is not curvy. I have small breasts and slender hips. However, I do have great legs and a decent butt from running. A body-fitted dress and heels will show it off nicely.
Tara immediately texts back. “Hell ya! Saturday night my house at 9.”
Tara lives in an apartment downtown, which is probably why she gets in so much trouble. She never has to drive. Well, there’s that need to be noticed too.
* * *
Blaine sits on my bed and watches me get ready. Fresh out of the shower, I have just come out to the mirror in my bedroom and I’m stark naked. I open my underwear drawer and take out a thong and push-up bra. I slide the panties on and turn so he can look at my butt. I glance over my shoulder at him. He has his head tilted. He likes this.
I lean over so my breasts hang down and put on my bra. Once hooked, I reach in and pull them higher. I turn to show him my cleavage. He smiles appreciatively. I pull a dress off a hanger and slide it seductively over my head, making sure to wiggle my hips back and forth in a slow motion. It fits my body like a glove. The neckline is scooped and low. I turn so my butt faces him. I bend over a bit and ask, “See any panty lines?”
He coughs. “Ah, no.” I hear the lust in his voice.
Cocking my hip out, I move my hand slowly down over my backside. “I think you’re right, nice and smooth.” I walk over to my closet and bend over instead of squatting down to find my shoes. I know my dress exposes more than my legs. “Now where are they?” I grab my highest black heels and saunter over to the bed. With a shoe in each hand, I crawl like a cat over to Blaine. I know he can see down my dress. He’s looking. I put my mouth right next to his ear and whisper, “How do I look so far?” I don’t wait for an answer and nibble his earlobe. I move down to his neck and leave a trail of kisses.
“Dangerous,” he breathes.
I straddle him and take his face in my hands. “Perhaps you should give me a reason to stay home tonight.” I kiss him and reach my hand down to place it on his crotch. I rub the rough denim and feel him grow hard. Taking that as a cue, I unbutton his jeans, slide the zipper down and slip my hand into his boxers. I stroke him as we kiss and he moans.
I want him inside me. I push him down on the bed and strip his pants off. I look up at his face, and it’s Jason. I take him in my mouth so fast; he doesn’t have a chance to stop me. He moans. I suck hard; his smooth, tender skin is sleek and soft on my tongue. He trembles, and I have no doubt he likes this. As he’s on the brink, I rise up and guide him into me. Oh, God, it’s so glorious. I gyrate my hips and his body shudders. I meet him there and cry out. “Jason!”
I jerk awake. Wait. Blaine was on that bed. How did he become Jason? I close my eyes, willing a replay with Blaine. It doesn’t work. Damn it. Blaine can’t even sleep with me in my dreams. I let out a big sigh and get out of bed. I pad to the kitchen and the tile is cool under my feet. The moon dimly lights the yard. The world wavers as tears fill my eyes. How can something be so perfect in every way but one? A really big one? Millions of stars twinkle above the Continental Divide. I watch for a while and am rewarded with what I hoped to see. One shoots by. I make a wish, and go back to bed.
Chapter Thirty-Five
It’s been haunting me for a couple of days now. How am I supposed to kiss Blaine, feel what I do and know he doesn’t? I think it’s like the being the only drunk in the room. When everyone is buzzed, you do whatever you wish. When you’re the only one? You second-guess every move. This calls for a plan.
“Lunch? I’ll meet you at the shop.”
I text Blaine with one thing in mind, I need to kiss him. Kiss him knowing he feels nothing and see if I still get that burning desire. Ice runs through my veins. If I don’t, where do we go? Gretchen’s words haunt me. “Just make sure you aren’t seeing only what you want to see.” That’s exactly what I’ve been doing. All these months I’ve been kissing him with intense desire for more while ignoring the suspicion he felt nothing. Betrayal is what comes to mind first, but that’s not really the emotion. I think he has no idea what people usually feel. I don’t know the right thing to do here. I just know what it is I need. To be craved.
The shop door opens with a familiar jingle announcing my presence. Blaine is working on a bike. “Hey, beautiful!” Last week those words made me feel special. Today? They don’t.
He doesn’t stop working. “I can’t leave for lunch. Want to get us something?” Sure. It’s what girlfriends do.
My feet clomp down the street like those of a petulant child. When it’s my turn, I place the order and wait. Because that’s what girlfriends do. I’m in a mood, and nothing is going to be right. Tapping out an inpatient beat with my foot, I see a couple kiss, as they wait for their sandwiches too. She moves over to his ear and whispers in it. He looks a little flustered, and I notice he shifts his hips a bit. Exactly. That’s what’s supposed to happen when your girlfriend makes suggestive comments in your ear. The girl next to me gives me a quick glare. She’s probably annoyed with my tapping. I stop. Casey, get a grip. You’re expecting the worst of Blaine right now. And that’s what you’ll get. Chill.
I take a deep breath. Okay, let’s set the stage to get this right. You love this guy, a lot. Give him a chance to show you why.
Walking back to the shop, I look out over the mountains and let them be awesome. I pay attention to the breeze in my hair and stop to smell a flower box. The sun is on my face offering its gentle embrace. I walk into the shop in a much better mood. “Lunch time!”
Blaine and Kaleb come out from behind the counter. Kaleb takes his food and says, “Thanks, Casey. You’re the best.” I flash him a smile.
Blaine takes his and sits down to eat. He looks up at me after a few bites and says, “Thanks.” Okay. No boyfriend of the year on that one, but let’s be fair. He didn’t know he was being tested.
I sit next to him. This is so hard. How is it I used come up with clever things to say and somehow end up kissing him? I’m at a total loss here. Maybe it’ll just come to me.
“Hey, Kaleb, I’m sorry to hear about you and Tara.”
“No worries.” He takes a sip of Coke to empty his mouth. “We weren’t really a good mix. She’s fun, but a bit too much for me.”
I give him a knowing smile. “So you’re back on the market. It shouldn’t take long for some girl to snatch you up.” Kaleb is big and muscular. Along with his dark skin and vivid blue eyes, he is swoon worthy.
He snorts. “I don’t know about that. The odds here are five to one. It’s tough out there.”
He’s right about that. “You just need to go fishing.” I tease. “But don’t go tonight. Tara organized a girl’s night out.”
He chortles. “Thanks for the warning.”
I can’t seem to eat my sandwich. I’ve on
ly taken a couple of bites. I wrap it up to take with me and realize I haven’t eaten much lately. A memory of Jason comes back to me.
“Ugh! My jeans are too tight.” I say as Jason lies on the bed while I get dressed. He reaches across and yanks me onto my back.
He tickles my stomach with kisses. “I like you fat and happy.”
I smack his head playfully. “That’s not the kind of thing you’re supposed to say to me.” But I laugh because I know he doesn’t think I’m fat.
“I’m serious. When you aren’t happy, you get skinny. You look great this way. Buy bigger jeans.” He goes back to kissing my…
Whoa. Don’t go there. I shake my head to clear my thoughts.
“Hey, Blaine,” I sing out in a provocative voice. “Want to make out with your girlfriend and remind her why she shouldn’t dance with any guys tonight?” Clever, I’m not.
Kaleb stands and grabs our garbage. “I’ll bring the trash to the Dumpster. You guys have five minutes.” He looks down at his watch and then winks at me.
I get up and saunter over to Blaine. Taking his face in my hands, I straddle him. My lips meet his, and his arms wrap around my waist. He slips his tongue into my mouth and I respond. This is nice. My body warms up. This works, whew. Except. I can’t help but wonder why you would do this if it didn’t. I pull back and look into his eyes. Why does he do this if he feels nothing? He whispers, “I love you.” He pulls me back and kisses me again. This time, it doesn’t work. I pretend anyway—and realize I’ve become him.
Chapter Thirty-Six
I slither into the tight dress. Black with a slight scoop neck, I opted for no cleavage tonight considering I’m going to be with Boobs-R-Us. The sleeves are sheer lace and make my arms look long. Pulling my hair forward, I look at the effect. My makeup is sexy and my curls are cooperating. I do a quick turn to make sure the thong doesn’t show through and flash to my dream the other night. Desire twinges.
Now for the hook. I slide violet patent-leather heels onto my feet. Not too high to walk, but high enough that I’m all legs. Oh yeah, that works. The eye is drawn to the color, and you can’t help but notice my toned calves. I lean into the mirror and slide on a touch more coral-pink lipstick.
I’m jittery with excitement. I want to drink with the girls tonight. I should be okay to drive if I do it early. But I decide to pack an overnight bag just in case I have too much. I can always crash at Tara’s if I need to.
Bass pulses through the stairs as I step up to Tara’s apartment. With music that loud, I don’t bother to knock. The door opens to the smell of all things girl. Tara walks out of the kitchen area with a tray. “Casey! You’re just in time for Jell-O shots.” She hands me a little paper cup filled with red Jell-O and whipped cream. Her perfume accosts my nose as she breezes by handing them out to Megan, Lisa, and Jill. Tara raises her cup and says, “To dancing until the cows come home!” Why not? I slurp the sweet contents down.
Megan gives me a hug. “Casey, you’re looking hot. I love your shoes.”
Megan is looking darn hot herself. She has on a tight fuchsia dress that looks fabulous with her dark blond hair and blue eyes. “Wow, you’re smoking too. Did Nick see you in that outfit?”
“He did.” She pauses. “Both times I put it on.” She winks at me and then blushes.
I chuckle. “You hussy! How’s playing house?”
“It’s awesome. No more driving back and forth to each other’s place. I love it.” Megan has a wine cooler in her hand.
Perfect. Not too strong. I need to pace myself. “Hey, did you bring enough of those that I could have one?”
“Of course! I’ll go get it for you.” Megan heads to the fridge.
I turn to Lisa and Jill. They both work with Tara. “Casey, you’ve got to try the Irish whiskey cheddar we just got. It melts in your mouth.” Jill’s warm brown eyes are glowing tonight. Lisa hands me a piece. “Try it.”
I’m not the least bit hungry, but I should eat something. I nibble it. The soft cheddar starts off with a bite and ends smoothly. “Oh, yum.”
Megan slips a cold wine cooler into my hand. “Are we talking about food again?” She reaches over and takes a slice of apple. I do too.
The apple is tart, making my mouth water. I take a sip of the wine cooler, and the sweetness balances the flavor. Tara starts to dance and we all join her. She yells, “Ladies, I think we need to do some fishing!”
* * *
The staccato clicking of stiletto heels on the sidewalk sounds like distant fireworks. With alcohol pulsing through our veins, our voices are high and loud. When we enter The Fish Bowl, the darkness tries to damper us. It can’t. We radiate a level of energy that could drown the strong.
Tara takes the lead and works her way over to the bar. “Five Jelly Beans, please!”
Uh-oh. I’m not doing shots. I exchange looks with Megan. She leans in to the bartender and says, “Make that three, please. We’ll take two wines with seltzer.”
“Thanks.”
“No worries. I don’t think Nick would be impressed if I came home and threw up.”
Lisa and Jill have found us a table near the dance floor. Tara walks over with the shots while Megan and I trail her. Sweat laced with perfume and cologne and the faded red spotlights swirling around create a sensual atmosphere. The throaty beat calls me. I set down my drink and grab Megan’s hand. “C’mon.”
Music flows over me and I begin to move. I let it seep into my pores. I gyrate my hips and sexual energy reverberates through my body. I close my eyes and let it take over. When I open them, I see a guy dance behind Megan, his hands on her hips as they sway. I smell a familiar mix of male and woodlands. My core begins to pulse with the music. Jason. Hands land on my hips, and I don’t have to turn around to know who’s behind me. I don’t want to anyway. We’ve done this a million times. I know how to move, and so does he. I’m dying to lean back into him. I don’t. I’m not sure what might happen if I did. The heat of exertion, and something else, drives my movements. I tremble with hunger and feed it with music. His hands are light on me, but their presence sears. I don’t ever want to stop. Megan looks over at me. She tilts her head toward our table. I turn to Jason and say, “Thanks.”
Once back at the table, Megan leans in toward me and speaks over the music. “That guy was totally turned on by you. Oh, my God, you should have seen his face. It’s a good thing he barely touched you. I might have had to go all ninja on him to protect Blaine’s honor.” She laughs.
“I’m pretty sure the guy dancing with you liked what he saw, too.” Cool wine pours down my throat in a gulp.
“Well, we’re definitely hot.” She places her cold drink on her neck.
On the dance floor Tara keeps some guy occupied, and he looks flustered. Not in a good way. Part of me wants to go save him. “Megan, look.”
“Oh, that poor guy. Should we save him?”
I nod my head, and we both go dance with Tara.
As the night progresses, the floor get packed. It’s hard to stay together, and I lose Megan. It doesn’t matter. It’s hard to talk, and I’m happy to focus on the music. After the first dance, Jason disappeared. But he’s back on the floor now. He’s seen me and makes his way over. I’m sweating and a little buzzed. This time when he puts his hands on my hips, firm pressure is applied. I move back closer to him, and his scent envelopes me. I have no doubt he smells me too. He speaks in my ear. “You look beautiful tonight.”
“Thanks.” I want to tell him he looks hot. But I don’t. He brushes up against me, and I know he’s hard. I want to push back further and feel all of him. Oh, God, maybe I will attack him after all. In my mind, his hands touch me everywhere. My lips burn with the thought of his, and I wish I could take him right here on the dance floor. Instead, I keep dancing.
We hear last call, and I know I have to find the girls. I stop dancing and turn to face him. “I’ve got to go. Thanks.” Without thinking I add, “I’ve missed you.” I’m so tempted to kiss him, an
d I look at his lips. I suck in my lower lip, and he does the same. His eyes are full of lust. It takes every ounce of self-control I have to walk away.
I can’t find anyone, but that’s not unusual. It’s every woman for herself this time of night. I know how to get into Tara’s apartment. My heels tap on the sidewalk. Lisa and Jill drive toward me and slow down. Lisa leans out the window and yells, “Tara took someone home. You don’t want to go up there!” I wave at her and smile as they drive away. Crap. I didn’t think to stop them. Drunk, there’s no way I should drive. I pull out my phone and hope I can catch Megan. She sent me a text earlier.
“I miss Nick. I know, pathetic. Gone home.”
I let out a big sigh and start walking back to find someone I know. Jason stops next to me. The window lowers to reveal wet hair stuck to his face. He’s flushed, and his scent reaches my nose. Damn if my body doesn’t prepare to assault.
“Hey, lose your friends?”
“Something like that. I shouldn’t drive. Would you give me a ride home?” I think I might regret this, but right now I don’t care.
He pushes the door open for me. I hop up, slam the door, and snap the seat belt in place. It’s like an old friend’s embrace. The odor of his truck is a mix of dirt, stale coffee, and cut pine. I reach down and take off my shoes. My feet are killing me. He chuckles. “What’s so funny?”
“Your feet stink.”
“Charmer.” I snort.
“Does your boyfriend know about those feet?” He’s still smiling.
“Oh, you’re a comedian. Not only does he know, he massages them after a long ski day.”
