by Cari Quinn
“You know I really should apologize for the hell I put you through.” He sighed. “It wasn’t fair to you. You were only trying to help me and I made it harder.”
And she rolled right into the gutter. “I thought it was my job to make you hard.”
He growled. “Dangerous territory, Doc.”
“Did I just say that?”
“Yeah. You did.”
“I’m sorry.” She giggled nervously. “I shouldn’t have gone there.”
“No, you shouldn’t.”
Well, wasn’t that a railroad spike to her happy attempt at flirting?
“We shouldn’t discuss how hard you make me.” His voice dropped to a low whisper. “Especially when you’re not close enough to examine it.”
She had no idea how to respond to a provocative statement like that. So she went with the very original, “Oh.”
Noise and conversation erupted on his side of the line. “Xavier! Yo man! We’re starving. Let’s go.”
“I’ll be right there.”
One of the other guys laughed. “You can call your woman back after you’ve taken your little blue pills, Old Man. Your limp dick isn’t going to do you any good until you do.”
She heard the muffle of his palm slipped over the mouthpiece on his phone. “Get out of here, Santiago, before I kick your ass.” She didn’t hear the response but heard Xavier’s response of, “Go to hell.”
More muffled laughter drifted through the line then Xavier’s voice came back. “I’m sorry about that. They’ve been sticking their heads in here, trying to get me to join them for dinner for the last twenty minutes.”
“You go. We’ll talk later.” She didn’t want to hang up.
“I’d rather talk to you.”
She smiled. “Call anytime. I’m bored out of my mind.”
“I miss you.”
“I miss you, too.” And his phone call only made her miss him more.
“Don’t forget our date. I’ve already made plans.”
“I won’t. It’s on my calendar. In pen.”
He was silent for a couple heartbeats. “I’ve got something very important I need to show you.” Her heart jumped. She didn’t know what to say, and thankfully he didn’t wait for a response before he said words that changed everything. “I love you, Frankie.”
With her jaw still resting on the floor, the line went dead.
She immediately picked up her cell phone, found his number and hit him back. Only to get voicemail.
“Asshole,” she muttered under her breath, sliding her phone back into her pocket when what she really wanted to do was chuck it against the wall.
How dare he drop the L-bomb—twice—just to hang up on her? Had he meant to say it? Was he afraid she wouldn’t say it back? Or was he just guaranteeing she’d show up at dinner?
Oh, good hell. His motivation didn’t matter. She’d be there because there wasn’t a place on earth she’d rather be.
Chapter Twenty-Five
“He’s here!” Christian yelled from the living room. “And he’s in a freakin’ limo!” The heavy thud of his footfalls racing down the hall warned her he’d be standing in her bedroom soon.
He rounded the corner and swept his hand over his hair. He looked like a giddy little kid, waiting for Santa.
“It’s the longest one I’ve ever seen.” He wiggled his brows. “And that’s saying something.”
Mom opened her mouth and Frankie jumped in. “Stop. Both of you.”
Two innocent expressions turned her way and she couldn’t help but laugh.
Christian recovered first. “You look great, Frank, but you’d better hurry. Don’t wanna keep Prince Charming waiting.” The doorbell rang and he raced out to answer it.
Frankie cocked her head and scowled. Leave it to Christian to put her concern into words. She’d worried over the last three days, after her conversation and the way it ended, how things would be when she came face to face with Xavier again.
Part of her wondered if he’d even show up. Or if he’d regret dropping those three little words and head for the hills. Maybe he’d become a mountain man. He’d make one hell of a sexy mountain man.
Another look in the full length mirror and she forced a smile.
“You look beautiful. Why the frown, dear?”
“It’s a smile. See?” She pulled her lips higher. “Teeth.”
Her mother laughed. “Take a deep breath.”
Frankie closed her eyes and allowed her lungs to stretch to their limits. When she opened her eyes again, her mother stood at her other side.
“Now … smile.”
This time, as her lips tilted up and her teeth appeared she didn’t look like she was snarling. She looked … happy. Beautiful. She smoothed her hands down the front of the salmon-colored dress that had shown up on her doorstep yesterday and slipped her feet into the matching mile-high heels. Both fit perfectly. Her heart swelled knowing Xavier had picked them out for her … and that he knew her sizes.
He knew her. But she still had a secret capable of shocking the hell out of him and potentially changing the way he saw her. She bit her lip and dropped her gaze to the floor.
“Whatever you’re thinking about, honey, I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about.” Her mother’s frigid hand enclosed around Frankie’s arm and she leaned into her daughter. “Don’t worry yourself out of letting a man who adores you love you.”
Frankie laughed lightly. “He doesn’t—”
“Don’t keep him waiting, sweetie.”
* * *
The man standing in her living room, talking to Christian wasn’t Xavier. This guy wore a dark suit and held a chauffeur’s hat in his hands. When he noticed her, he stiffened then smiled.
“Ms. Holden.” He extended his hand. “I’m here to take you to meet Mr. Xavier. Are you ready?”
She nodded, biting her tongue to keep from demanding where Xavier was and why he’d sent a driver for her.
The driver opened the door and went outside, pausing on the porch. “I’ll be waiting by the car.”
Frankie turned to hug Christian, who wrapped her in an embrace second only to the comfort she found in Xavier’s arms.
Chris kissed her temple. “Don’t psych yourself out, Frank.”
“I’m not—”
“Going to freak yourself out on the ride to wherever you’re going. Just relax. It’ll be fine.” He slid something small, square, cold, metallic into her hand. “Just in case.”
She blushed from head to toe. “Thanks.”
“Don’t show your mom. She’ll have a cow.”
“Show me what?” Her mother stepped up to give a hug. “And I don’t have cows.”
“Charlotte, you have a whole frickin’ herd grazing in the back yard. But I love you anyway.” Christian gave Charlotte a quick hug before heading for the door. He paused and pointed at Frankie. “Love you, Frank. Call me in the morning. And you—” He aimed his finger in her mother’s direction. “Promise you’ll call me if you need anything tonight.”
She smiled. “I promise. Now get out of here. Both of you.”
Frankie shielded her eyes from the bright sky. The sun had begun its descent, not quite evening yet no longer afternoon. She climbed into the backseat of the limo and waved to her mother before the driver shut the door.
The ride didn’t take too long, and the closer they got to their destination, the surer she became of where they were going and what she’d find once she got there. She took her cell out of her purse when a text message came in.
Go with ur <3. Luv u, C
She smiled and turned the phone off. Her heart knew exactly what it wanted, had known it for a while now, actually.
As they pulled up in front of Xavier’s large two-story home, and he came out onto the porch, dressed in a tuxedo with a tie the exact color of her dress, her heart tried to jump out of her chest.
She loved him.
It was about damn time she admitted it to both of them.
>
* * *
Xavier felt like one big bundle of exposed nerve endings. He’d planned this night down to every last detail. When he’d first asked her to dinner, he’d thought he’d take her to some fancy restaurant, but the more he considered what this dinner, this conversation, this night meant, he knew he couldn’t do it in a public setting.
So he hired the maid to clean the house from top to bottom, the driver to keep him from making love to Frankie in the back seat of a car, the caterer to cook something delicious, and the florist to make just the right arrangements.
He checked his watch. Again. Pulled the curtain back. Twice. And when the black limo eased to a stop at the curb, it took every ounce of control he had not to run out and scoop her into his arms. He strolled out onto the porch with his hands stuffed deep into his pockets.
The driver came around the car and Xavier shifted from his right foot to his left. When the door opened and the driver offered a hand to Frankie, Xavier’s entire body tensed. He couldn’t wait to see her. It’d only been a few days, but those days felt like forever.
One long leg appeared, quickly followed by the other and then, there she was. His heart jumped, jolted and thudded. His throat got all tight and his palms sweated. She stood and smoothed her hands over her flat stomach, finishing the motion by moving over her hips. He bit back a groan. Her curled blond hair, caught by a subtle breeze, lifted away from her face. Their eyes caught and locked.
He’d told himself he’d wait for her on the porch, make her come to him, but he couldn’t wait another moment to touch her. He hurried down the long walkway, smiling when she did an adorable stutter step thing and practically ran to greet him.
She threw her arms around his neck and clunked him in the back of the head with her silver handbag. He winced. She gasped. He could have sworn the driver laughed.
She pulled away from him and took his cheeks between her hands. “Oh, my gosh! Are you okay? I’m so sorry.”
Xavier took her hands in his. “I’m glad you’re here.”
Her smile turned him all warm and gooey inside. “Can we try the hug again?”
“If I can kiss you, too.”
She stepped into him, pressing herself so close not even air could fit between them. Her hips fit perfectly between the palms of his hands. He held on, letting her take the lead.
And heaven help him, did she ever.
She held his face between her palms and planted a kiss on his lips. Her fingers dug into the hair at the base of his neck. His hands slipped down and cupped her tight rear end, bringing those sexy hips of hers tight against his pelvis.
“You scald me,” she said against his lips.
His breaths came out in ragged pants. “And if I don’t get you inside, we’re gonna give the neighbors one hell of a show.”
* * *
Any doubt Frankie might have had disappeared the moment Xavier took her into his arms. She could feel his excitement, his enthusiasm tingling on her skin, mingling with her own.
When they got to the doorstep, he paused. “Close your eyes.”
She did, and with her hand in his, he guided her over the threshold and into his home. They walked over the hardwood floors of his living room and onto the tile of his kitchen. A door opened.
“Give me one second.” She heard his footsteps, the rustling of something, the definite scrape and tangy smell of a match strike. “Okay, you can open your eyes.”
The moment her eyes opened, her breath flew away. Yellow flowers of every shape, size and variety decorated his back patio. He stood next to a table with a bright yellow tablecloth and white place settings. White tapered candles burned. Off in the distance the sun winked from behind the mountains, casting the exact hue he loved, very similar to the dress he’d chosen for her.
“It’s beautiful.”
“You’re beautiful.” His eyes ever so slowly caressed her. “I gotta admit, I love pickin’ out your clothes.” He held out a chair. After she sat down, he eased down into the chair next to her. He laughed and shook his hands out. “Man, I am so nervous.”
She smiled. “Me, too.”
A man appeared from out of the kitchen door. He wore a dark suit with a white towel draped over his arm. “Shall we serve?”
“Yes, please.”
Frankie was impressed.
And as dinner came and went, she realized he’d planned every last detail. All of her favorites—or his—made up everything from their clothes to dessert, the place settings, to the scenery.
The kitchen light flipped off and she knew they were now alone. Xavier’s smile indicated he knew it, too. He leaned forward, his forearms on the table supporting his weight.
“I missed you.” He shook his head. “I didn’t realize how crazy it would make me to leave you for a few days.”
She reached across the table and put her hand on his arm. “I know what you mean.”
“I meant what I said, Frankie.” He placed a hand over hers. “I love you.” His expression grew somber, his eyes grave as they sought hers. “The only other woman I ever loved went away to college and ended up marrying a guy she met while I was still hanging out in high school. She broke my heart, and I vowed I would never love again.”
He rubbed a hand over the goose bumps rising on her skin. “I kept telling myself you’d hurt me—and maybe you will,” he added with a shrug. “I think that’s why I was such an ass to you during my recovery. I thought if you walked away, I’d be right about you and I’d survive if you left before you could take my heart with you.”
Showing this vulnerability to her had to be one of the toughest thing he’d done in a long time, if not ever, and it made her love him all the more.
“But you kept coming back.” He laughed and smiled. “The harder I pushed you away, the harder you fought to stay. And now I never want you to leave.”
He reached under the table and pulled out a file, handing it to her. She felt her confusion register on her face. “What’s this?”
He didn’t answer, just motioned for her to open it.
She did and her confusion intensified. Her medical degree told her exactly what she was looking at. But why would he… “I don’t understand.”
“I know my past is a big hang-up for you. And I get it. Really.” He scrubbed his face. “I did a lot of soul searching those last hours we spent together in Boston and decided I wanted to be the kind of man you deserved. So, I went to the doctor and—”
“And you’re clean.”
“Yep.” He smiled. “I only want to ever sleep with one woman for the rest of my life.”
“I want that too, but…”
“But?” Anxiety dripped from that one syllable.
She wondered if he could hear her heart banging around in her chest or the blood rivaling Niagara Falls in her veins. Was she really going to admit this to him? It wasn’t like he wouldn’t figure it out eventually.
In for a penny…
“The truth is, X—” She made sure to look directly into his hazel eyes and not so much as blink as she admitted, “I’ve only ever slept with you.”
“But we didn’t…” His jaw dropped open. His eyes widened. And time stood still. Even the flame on the candle froze mid flicker. “But you’re thirty-two.”
She nodded.
His eyes closed and he shook his head. He slumped back into his chair and she felt like crying. Seconds dragged on and she wondered if he’d ever look at her again. His head moved ever so slowly on his shoulders, like he was confused, trying to shake off the say-what-huh? His eyes opened and the intensity in those hazels nearly knocked her over.
He stood and did just that to his chair. He drew her up out of her chair and into his arms. His kiss was tender. “I’m not good enough for you, sweetheart.” He sighed. “But oh, man, I wanna be.”
She thought of the report he’d given her freely. “You are. Oh, baby, you already are.”
As soon as he stiffened in her arms, she realized her mistake.
> “Huh uh. Don’t go there.” She grabbed hold of his chin and looked him in the eye. “Talk to me.”
His eyes closed. He dropped his head, resting his forehead against hers. Seconds ticked by, filled with his rough breathing. He held her tight as if she were his anchor in the sea of memories. “My dad. Ah … he … whenever I cried or wasn’t strong enough or tough enough, he made sure I understood just how unacceptable weakness is.”
“He—” She couldn’t say it.
“Beat the shit out of me, yeah.” He pulled her even closer, squeezed her until her bones bended. “With every hit, he told me I was a baby.”
“Oh, X.”
“No pity, Doc. I can’t do pity.”
She kissed him, a gentle brush of mouths. “No pity.”
“I love you.”
This time when their lips met, she showed him exactly how much she loved him. Tongues tangled, hands roamed, breaths mingled. She needed this. He needed this.
But then he paused.
“Why did you wait?” he asked against her mouth.
Her heart felt like it might explode and her brain couldn’t possibly register coherent thought. “What?”
“Why are you a thirty-two-year-old virgin?”
“Mom taught me sex should be shared with somebody special.” She shrugged, feeling like some kind of loser just waiting for her screenplay. At least she wasn’t forty. “While in med school, I was too busy working and studying to date, and then after, I just wasn’t interested in the arrogant athletes only interested in getting down my pants.”
She laughed when Xavier growled and pulled her even closer, nuzzling her neck. “Did you want to wait until you were married?”
She nodded against his chin. “I guess once I’d waited for so long, I thought that would kinda be the way of it.”
“And how do you feel now?”
With him so close, his need for her pressed hard and demanding into her hip, she wanted to forget her wants and just go with her desires. She ground herself against him, feeling naughty as he moaned into her ear. She grinned. “Sorry.”
“No, you’re not.” He did a little grinding of his own. “Now answer the question. Given the choice—with no pressure—” He grabbed her butt, holding her firmly against his rising need. “—do you want to wait?”
