by W. J. May
He jerked his hand through his hair again. “I can’t believe we are having this conversation.”
“Answer the question, Devon!”
“I don’t know.” He paused, as if to collect his thoughts. “I don’t think children are born evil. Maybe there’s a gene which predisposes them to want to do wrong.” He sighed. “I think if that’s true, then their environment would be what would bring out their wickedness or keep it tucked away.”
“So, logically, if one day we got married, and decided to have children, our child would most likely be good--look at you and me! Even if there’s a hint of my father’s genes, he or she could still be a normal, happy person.” Hadn’t she spent most of last year terrified she was suddenly going to turn into her father? To simply wake up one day and have morphed into a monster overnight? What a ridiculous fear! I can’t believe I have wasted so much time being afraid of something so stupid.
“That’s not—I don’t—how is this even a subject for us to discuss?” Devon stuttered, unable to finish a thought intelligently. It was a side of him Rae had never seen, and it scared her. Devon was always composed, always able, always in control. To see him at a loss, out of control, it was terrifying, and only served to jack up her tension and insecurity.
“So if you don’t think I’m evil, there must be some other problem. Are you ashamed of me? Because I’m Simon Kerrigan’s spawn? Is that it?” Anger and a sinking sense of loss and betrayal warred for dominance in Rae’s heart. The previous year, Devon had been the first to tell her about her father’s terrible legacy, but he had also been the first to see her as herself, rather than Simon Kerrigan’s daughter. Or so she has thought. Now, she wasn’t sure what to think. Tears coursed down her cheeks.
“Slow down!” Devon’s eyes grew big. He reached for one of her folded arms and grabbed her hand to hold it tight. “This is so frustrating!” He pulled her close, letting her cry, rubbing her back and begging her to calm down. Bit by bit, it worked. After a time, he hugged her a moment and then held her slightly away, his hands resting on her shoulders. “Not you, you’re not frustrating. Everything else is. You’re this awesome, amazing girl! You could have any guy, and yet you pick me.”
Why wouldn’t she? Wasn’t it the other way around? Why did Devon like her?
“I’m the luckiest guy! I don’t want to screw this up. I—I just can’t shake a lifetime of teaching to satisfy my physical desires.”
Teaching? Seems more like societal superstition to me.
He twirled a piece of her hair between his fingers and stared absently past her. “You haven’t had it ingrained since you began school. It’s like trying to learn that fire doesn’t burn you. It’s almost instinctual to think that it’s wrong.”
If he thinks we’re so wrong together, how could this ever be right? “Are you trying to re-start the fight?” Are you saying I’m ignorant now ‘cause I haven’t been taught? Tears rushed to her eyes again but she refused to let any of them fall.
“No, I’m not.” He stepped back and sat on the desk, his fist pounded the top of it. “I don’t even know where this freakin’ argument came from and I never want to see you cry again.” A long, exasperated breath escaped his lips.
Rae didn’t understand his frustration. Her point was sound. So what if I still hang onto the childhood fantasies that love can conquer all? If he wants to take things slow, fine with me. But does he have to keep saying that us being together is wrong? She had always believed that he would eventually be alright with everything, and get tired of living in secret. She had never considered what would happen after that, but she had never doubted that it would, eventually, happen. Now, she wasn’t so sure. It felt like he was blindsiding her with this, but she realized that the reality was that these feelings had been inside him all this time, but he had kept it from her. It seemed clear, no matter how much she wanted it not to be true, that these opinions of his were real and long-standing. Unless the Anna-chick has something to do with it. She clenched her jaw, forcing her thoughts to stay just that – thoughts. Letting her doubts and insecurities out into the open would only give them more power, and she knew instinctively that it would ruin any chance she and Devon had at happiness. She thought back to the previous year, when Devon had still been dating his “normal” ex-girlfriend from Roe Hampton. Devon had broken off the relationship. They had never discussed it, but Rae suspected he had done so after realizing his feelings for her. They had not started dating until the end of the year, before she left for the summer, but it showed that Devon couldn’t fight his feelings for her forever. Maybe the same could be said for this situation.
Maybe he just needs time to see it for himself. Fighting wouldn’t solve anything. She needed to show him that they belonged together. She walked over and gave him a short tentative hug. “Truce?” For now.
He stroked her hair. “We’ll get this sorted, both of us, together.” He kissed the top of her head.
She forced a smile and looked up at him. “Then, I’d better get going back to my dorm. Madame Elpis’ll be starting her bedroom checks.”
“Go, before we get caught,” he said but made no effort to push her away.
“Alrighty, I’m going.” She sighed and kissed him once more before she reluctantly pulled away. Heading towards the door, she licked her lips to taste him one last time. In the hallway, she turned to wave at him before disappearing down the stairwell. Something had changed tonight and she knew things were going to be different between them.
She raced back to Aumbry House, making no sound as she came in the door. No one was around. The halls were quiet. Alone on the antique marble stairs, she let her tears of frustration fall. How would things turn out, if they were two teenagers without tatùs, without the world of responsibility resting on their shoulders? She wished their lives were that simple.
Chapter 14
Warning Bells
The evening of the dance, Rae ran down the hall chasing the flow of constant chatter.
Molly stood in the bathroom, makeup done, in front of a full-length mirror straightening her gorgeous auburn hair, which now fell pin-straight on her shoulders.
A twinge of envy shot through Rae. She twirled an unruly curl around her finger. No point in straightening her hair. It never lasted long enough. At least Molly had talked her into adding the blonde streaks into her dark mop the previous year. Rae had instantly loved it and kept up the style.
Desiree curled wisps of her hair around her face, and stared into the other mirror. She wore torn jogging pants and a sport top. Her tatù danced as she moved her hips to the music playing on a docked iPod sitting on the counter.
“You could go to the dance dressed in that.” Rae pointed at Desiree’s clothes and giggled. “All the guys would go crazy!”
“She’ll make the girls of Roe Hampton insanely jealous,” Molly added.
“It’s a tatù, not a tramp-stamp.” Desiree smiled, despite trying to sound annoyed. “I’ll stick to my simple dress.” She unplugged her curling iron. “However, according to my father, I seem to get into enough trouble without trying.”
“Why are you guys getting ready so early?” Rae checked her watch. “It’s only five. The dance doesn’t start until eight, right?”
“Yeah, but Maria and Haley are coming over,” Molly said. “We’re ordering pizza, and Reece’ll be here about seven. Plus, it’s going to take me an hour to do your hair so I wouldn’t have any time to get ready then.” She watched Rae in the mirror.
“You don’t have to do my hair. I plan on just wearing it in a bun. There’s no use straightening it. You know it’ll just go curly in five seconds.”
“Molly’s got big plans for your head tonight. She said she wants something more dramatic than last year. There’s no photos, but people talk, and I totally want to see Molly’s talent,” Desiree said. “I’ll grab a chair from my room for you.” She disappeared out the bathroom door.
“What? Wait a minute. I think–“
“
Too late.” Molly grabbed Rae’s arm to prevent her escape. “I bought these sparkly little ponytail holders and we’re going to put some twists and braids into your hair. We’ll leave most of it down, just put the sides up and do all the little bits. It’ll look awesome. Trust me.”
Rae let her shoulders drop and exhaled. “Fine.” She pretended to give in but was secretly ecstatic that Devon would get to see her all dolled up by Molly’s best efforts. Molly might be loud and sometimes obnoxious, but having all of her considerable talents focused on Rae was, occasionally, a plus. “As long as it won’t make you late for seeing Reece. I want to meet him before the dance. You know, make sure he’s good enough for you.”
“He is. He’s the pie in my apple.”
“Pardon?” Rae raised her eyebrows.
“You know, apple pie.”
“Molls,” she laughed, “I think you mean he’s the apple of your eye.”
“Whatever.” Molly waved her hand. She turned as Desiree walked in with a chair. “Sit. Let’s get started.”
Two hours later, Rae followed Desiree out of the bathroom. She had to admit Molly had outdone herself again. Her hair looked awesome, like it belonged on someone else’s head. The tiny braids and twists were going to be a pain to take out later, but the finished look was definitely worth the trouble.
Walking down the hall, Rae had to laugh. Molly hadn’t stopped talking about Reece the entire time. Desiree and Haley wouldn’t shut up about Kraigan. The air seemed to be charged with excitement, and it had nothing to do with Molly’s tatù.
Inside her room, Molly took charge once again. “Rae, you’ve got to get dressed. Reece’s going to be here in about fifteen minutes, and I want you downstairs with me to see him when he gets here.”
Desiree reached inside the closet and pulled the dress bag out. She handed it to Rae with a dramatic curtsey. “Your highness.” She had a big grin on her face.
Rae grabbed the bag out of Desiree’s hands and leaned forward to whisper, “Just remember, payback’s a bitch. I’d be keeping one eye trained on me all evening, prince-ass.”
Desiree let out a throaty laugh. She straightened and gave Rae a light shove. Unprepared, Rae lost her balance and fell backward on the bed.
“I’ll get you, my pretty.” Desiree pounced on top of her. Both girls rolled and play-fought, enthralled in a fit of giggles.
“Stop it!” Molly hollered. “You guys are gonna ruin Rae’s hair and wreck her dress. None of us has a tatù to fix that in time! Don’t make me use this.” Molly pointed her fingers at them, little sparks jumping from the tips.
Desiree harrumphed but slid beside Rae on the bed. She and Rae leaned their backs against the wall, crossing their arms and legs simultaneously. That only brought on another bout of laughter.
“Sorry, Molls. I promise to be good now.” Rae tried to wipe the smile off her face and raised her hand. “Scout’s honor.” It felt good to have friends like this. These were the moments Rae figured she would remember the most after she graduated.
Molly swatted Desiree’s feet and shook a finger at her. “You’re only trouble. I finally have Rae dressing and acting ladylike, and you go encouraging her to act the silly-sausage.”
Desiree stuck her tongue out but stopped goofing around long enough to help Molly take Rae’s dress out of the dress bag. Rae crawled off the bed and slipped into her dress.
“We gotta go,” Molly said when Rae turned around. “It’s almost seven.” She grabbed her bag and phone. “We’ll see the rest of you at the dance.”
“I need a pee-break before we head down,” Rae said as they passed the bathroom.
“Hurry.” Molly checked her phone. “Reece just texted. He’s in the parking lot. I’ll let him know we’ll meet him outside Aumbry House.”
Rae glanced up at the bathroom door frame as she slipped inside, Carter’s conspiracy theory that it had been rigged playing in her mind. Better to be safe than sorry. Nothing appeared out of the ordinary. Her heels clicked lightly against the marble. She stopped short when she saw herself in the mirror.
Where a girl had been only a few minutes before, a woman now stood. Rae couldn’t believe that she was looking at herself. The dress gave Rae’s small chest curves. Its empire waist gave her legs added length and she admired the shape of her ankles and calves. She did a slow twirl, her grin turning into a full smile when she caught a glimpse of her tatù. The silver in the dress made the fairy’s wings sparkle more than usual. It felt like the wings fluttered on her skin.
Wait till Devon sees me. She couldn’t wait to see his face. Leaning towards the mirror, she wiped a smudge of mascara.
Bang!
Rae jumped, her levitation tatù almost causing her head to hit the ceiling. She spun, arms extended and ready to do whatever she needed to protect herself.
“What the heck?” Molly shouted, jumping out of the way as Rae landed.
“Sorry. Instinct sometimes kicks in and my tatùs react before I do.” Rae checked her heels to see if they were alright.
“You lose control?”
Only when I think someone’s after me. “I’m working on it…” Rae shrugged. “I hate it when that happens.”
“That’d be bad if it happened in public.”
“It wouldn’t happen then. If I feel I’m in danger, it’s like my tatù kicks up a notch.”
“Yeah, ‘cause I’m a little bit dangerous,” Molly sang.
Rae grabbed a face towel and tossed it at her. “Very funny. I’ve been a bit on edge since Alecia got hurt in here, and nervous tonight wearing this fab dress.” Rae grinned sheepishly. “It kinda pulls me out of my usual. I feel very—uh—pretty.”
“You’re welcome. Now hurry up! Reece’s here.”
The two of them rushed downstairs, slowing to a more decorous walk as they passed by Madame Elpis’ room. Thankfully, the door didn’t open.
Pushing through the doors, Rae wondered how Molly could move so fast in her dress without it riding up or personal bits falling out.
Reece, looking exactly like the photo Rae had seen, waited outside Aumbry House, leaning against a cast iron lamppost. A big smile brightened his face when he saw Molly. He wore a very expensive suit; distinguished, yet still maintaining a certain youthfulness. Rae liked him without even speaking to him. The way he stared at Molly was enough for her.
“Molls, you look fantastic.” He reached out to swing her around in a full circle.
Rae watched them kiss and cuddle. Swallowing hard, she tried to suppress her jealousy. They felt no shame in public--and had nothing to hide.
“This is my best friend, Rae.”
“Hello.” He reached his hand towards her.
“Hi.” She shook his hand. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”
“Same here. Molls hasn’t stopped talking about you.” He grinned.
“I don’t think she stops talking at all.” Rae laughed and shot a glance at her friend. “I wouldn’t change a thing about her.” Molly rolled her eyes and mouthed “whatever.”
Reece released a deep, throaty chuckle. “You’re probably right, but with a body like hers, the chatter’s fine with me.” He reached down to squeeze Molly’s bottom; a knowing look passed between the couple. Could people read things between her and Devon as clearly as this?
“You look very handsome.” Molly grabbed his jacket and pulled him close to her.
Rae took it as her cue to leave. “Why don’t you guys catch up? I’ll go see if Julian and Devon are ready.”
“See you ‘na bit.” Molly’s voice came out muffled against Reece’s neck.
Rae headed to Joist House and took the stairs two at a time to the top floor. She knocked on Devon’s door first. As she waited, she glanced down to straighten her dress and fix the shawl.
A door slammed, startling her. This time she didn’t jump but instinct told her to be on guard, so she cautiously turned to see who had made the noise. Blinking in surprise, she pressed against the door when she saw who s
tomped towards her.
“Kraigan?”
“What’re you doing here, Kerrigan?” Man, our names sounds alike. He wore jeans and a polo.
She laughed. “I could ask you the same thing.”
“I was just conversing with Julian.” He glanced back down the hall and then looked her up and down. “Dressed in that, I assume you’re going to the dance.” He grinned. “Don’t be throwing yourself at the boys, the school’s not going to know what to do with you.” He sauntered down the hall.
Oh no he didn’t— Rae knew he was teasing but she was thankful he hadn’t seen the back of her dress. “I hope you’re not going dressed like that. Or is that your best outfit from the orphanage?” she joked back.
He reached the end of the hall and turned back to her at the stairwell door. “Ha ha. I went to the local charity shop and bought an Elvis tuxedo in baby blue.” He faked a very obvious anxious look. “You don’t think it’ll be too much?”
She laughed. “It’ll be perfect. Just make sure it covers your tatù. The Privy Council might take you in for questioning.” Speaking of covering—“Kraigan?” she called as he disappeared through the doorway to head down the stairs.
“Yeah?” He popped his head around.
“Where’d you get the Privy Council photo?”
“Why? We did great on the report. Who cares?”
“Me. I covered your ass when Carter drilled me.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Oh. Sorry. Looks like I owe you one then.” He winked as his head once again disappeared through the doorway. “I’ll see ya at the dance.”
“You so owe me!” She yelled at Kraigan and caught his laughter floating up from the bottom of the stairs. She pounded on Devon’s door, adding her foot for good measure.
“What’s with the yelling out here?” Someone called from the other end of the hall.
