by Carmen Caine
I fought my rising panic to focus only on his voice and stare into his eyes. It took several tries, but then I was just breathing like he was, long slow intakes of air like going up on a roller coaster and then letting it all out once before repeating the process again.
It calmed me almost at once.
I looked around.
It was warm. It looked like I’d only succeeded in transporting us deeper into the woods. We were standing in a small clearing next to a rock wall. Faint lights and shadows played on the stones. To the left, I could see the fused light cord still running through the dark trees surrounding us. Wherever we were, we hadn’t really gone far, I guess.
We certainly hadn’t gotten any closer to Earth.
I guess my power to dream and use it to forge my own destiny was underdeveloped. I couldn’t control it enough to direct it to what I wanted. It was weird. My negative thoughts had so much more power. I guess I’d been working on those kind much more than the others.
“I don’t think I can do this,” I confessed in a whisper, dimly aware that I was proving my point by reinforcing my negative thoughts again.
“Just what was that thing you created?” Jareth asked me then, his dark eyes lit with a glint of humor, but there was sympathy in them as well. “It’ll give me nightmares.”
“I was trying to get us all home,” I answered, blinking away sudden tears.
Rafael pulled me close and hugged me hard. “It’s ok, little pixie,” he whispered into my hair.
I just let myself stay there and refused to think about anything except how much I loved Rafael and appreciated the fact that he was there.
“We should rest for bit,” Rafael proposed after a bit.
“Good idea,” Jareth agreed. “She’s getting exhausted.”
Suddenly I was exhausted. And I was getting thirsty. My lips were parched. I felt Jerry stir in my sweatshirt pocket and my heart tugged, hoping he was still hibernating and not suffering from thirst or hunger. Yet. Blondie had said there was nothing for humans to eat or drink here. I wondered if it was true, but I was too afraid to even attempt imagining some sort of water.
“Here,” Jareth said, thrusting a water bottle in my face. He waved to his guitar case that he’d just dropped onto the ground. “I only brought a few, but you might as well drink up.”
It was the best water I’d ever tasted. Cool and refreshing. And after seeing Jerry drink his fill as well, I tucked him back into my sweatshirt. Tightening the water bottle cap, I leaned back against the rock wall to gather my scattered wits and rest, if only for a few moments.
Sitting down next to me, Rafael placed his hand on the back of my neck and gently rubbed my cheek with his thumb. It was relaxing.
With a faraway look in his eyes, Jareth tuned his guitar and absently strummed the strings. Gradually, the soft notes morphed into a song to accompany his voice. I just listened. There was no doubt he was a talented musician. He knew how to embed his emotions into music.
I don’t know how much time passed. One moment, I sat there cradling my head on my knees, taking comfort in Rafael’s presence and listening to Jareth’s music. And the next moment, I woke up with Rafael bending over me.
“No more dreams, little pixie,” he said, his amused gray eyes studying mine.
I stared up at him sleepily.
It took a moment to remember where I was. It took even longer to realize that my dreams were even more dangerous here than my thoughts. I jumped up so quickly that I had to steady myself against the low rock wall.
“What did I do?” I gasped.
“Nothing irrecoverable,” Jareth said. His voice came from high above my head.
I glanced up to see him pacing along the top of the stone wall, his hands locked behind his back. But the wall was much taller than before and part of it had morphed into a replica of Disneyland’s Cinderella Castle. A few feet away there was a puddle of white, melted goo.
I covered my mouth with my hands, vaguely recalling I’d been dreaming about being chased through a castle by an evil Pillsbury Doughboy. I eyed the puddle of white, melted goo again.
“Fortunately, Fae light still has its uses here,” Rafael said with a smile, following my questioning gaze. “You have an interesting mind, little pixie.”
I wasn’t sure interesting was exactly the right word.
Jareth dropped down from the wall, landing lightly on his feet. “Shall we go?” he asked quietly.
We didn’t really speak much after that. And we left quickly, following the ever-growing channel of light through the dark trees surrounding us.
I tried not to think of anything but what I saw in front of me. I had some success, and it made me more observant than usual. It wasn’t long before I could tell something was very wrong with Jareth. It was in the tenseness of his shoulders, the way he walked, and even in the tilt of his head.
Thinking it better to engage in conversation rather than let my thoughts wander, I skipped ahead a few steps to join him, leaving Rafael to bring up the rear.
“What’s bothering you, Jareth?” I asked, picking up his arm to put it around my neck.
He didn’t say anything at first, but finally, in a voice so low I almost didn’t hear it, he answered, “I was made to destroy this place. I’m a weapon, Sydney.”
I frowned. “You’re not under Melody’s control—” I began.
“I’m still a weapon,” he cut me off gruffly. “I’m capable of destroying the Tree of Life, maybe even this place and Earth along with it.” He shrugged in helpless resignation. “Maybe that’s what I’ll do here, after all. It’s what I’ve been created to do.”
I felt horrible. “It’s my fault,” I whispered. “If I hadn’t come here—”
“Neither of you are to blame,” Rafael interrupted us from behind. “I ordered Jareth to bring me here. The fault is mine. And I was the first one to make the wrong Blue-Threaded choice.”
We all stopped walking and just looked at each other.
“So, we’re all responsible,” Jareth said with a bitter curl of his lip. “And our fates have brought us here, just the same.”
I bowed my head. Maybe they’d made mistakes. I hadn’t made my choice yet. The pressure of it all—the sheer weight of it—was becoming too much to bear.
How did Samantha do it? How did she hold onto her dream through it all? How did she persevere through the negativity to create a new reality? I wondered what such powerful thoughts actually looked like.
I guess I’d really managed to marry my heart’s wish with my burning curiosity that time, because we were suddenly caught up in some kind of vortex. It was kind of like those special effects used in movies to illustrate jumping to light speed. The darkness whooshed past us and all at once we were still standing next to the conduit, but on the edge of a magical world, a world of beauty.
It was beyond inspiring just to look at it, a collection of crystal towers sweeping gracefully into the sky, lit with internal golden light. Threads of light ran through each of the stones, depicting different scenes of butterflies, flowers, and birds that—as I watched—detached from the stones to fly or move about on their own.
The entire place was alive.
Windows dotted the structures, and from them I could hear the peaceful sounds of flutes inviting those outside to enter and take rest. A glowing pool of purple light surrounded the entire place like a moat, and though the sky behind the entire structure was still black, it was an exotic, velvety darkness, holding beauty in its own right.
It was a place of serenity and harmony.
A cool wind blew against my face, bringing with it the refreshing, pleasing scent of coffee.
There was no doubt about it. This entire creation belonged to Samantha, her life’s work.
I just stared at it, awestruck.
Jareth gave a low whistle, and as if in a dream, knelt by the purple moat, skimming his hand over its glowing surface.
“Part of me belongs here,” he confessed in a w
hisper. “Not with the Brotherhood, but here, in this place. It calls to me like a siren’s song.” There was a wild, almost hungry look in his eyes.
I kind of understood what he meant. The place was an inspiration. But it didn’t make me want to stay. It made me want to create a world of my own.
Jareth’s face had turned almost sad, and I moved back to give him his privacy.
And promptly stepped on Rafael’s toes.
As I whirled to apologize, he caught me about the waist, looking at me from under long, black lashes.
I reached up to lock my hands behind his neck and meet his gaze. “Thank you for coming for me,” I whispered, letting my love for him shine in my eyes.
“I will chase you until the end of time, little pixie,” he replied with a small smile teasing his lips. “I will always come for you, no matter what dimension we end up in.”
I knew there was a bunch of negative things to think about. Like the fact that we were trapped here and would likely die of thirst before I figured out what my Blue Thread was all about. But I didn’t want to think about any of that right now. Right now, I had that moment with him. And the only thing I wanted to do was to be happy with him and kiss him.
So I did.
His lips were soft. Warm. And the kiss was timeless. I stayed there, wrapped in a warm cocoon of love and sharing a happiness that exceeded any expectation that I’d ever had of romance.
Finally, our lips parted and I whispered, “I guess I’m learning to live in the now.”
“It’s not a bad thing, is it?” he asked, his smile growing.
I just laughed.
I think I could have stayed there forever. I probably would have.
But then, Jareth lurched to his feet, and then I heard it.
A hollow, wailing sound.
Emerging from the black forest behind us was the Mutant Tulpa.
Chapter Twelve – The Forbidden
Briefly, I wondered if we could escape and hide in Samantha’s haven just yards behind us, but I knew we’d never make it in time to escape the Mutant Tulpa’s clutches. It hovered in the air, only a few feet away at the edge of the shadowy forest.
This time, there really was nowhere to hide.
The Mutant Tulpa had grown even larger since I’d last seen it. And more powerful. It just hung there, emitting fear and terror that instantly wiped out what fragile progress I’d made in controlling my thoughts. How could I destroy the evil staring right at us, something made from years of accumulated human fear? It was far too strong and powerful for me.
My dread manifested itself as a Tulpa above my head. I heard it pop into existence. It actually shrieked, voicing what I’d felt inside. And as I watched, it left me, pulled as if by some invisible string to the Mutant Tulpa crouching a short distance away like some grotesque oversized tarantula.
The Tulpa my dread had produced was only a few feet away when one of the Mutant Tulpa’s black tentacles snaked out to latch onto it. With a slurping, sucking sound, it swallowed it whole.
I closed my eyes and shuddered.
The Mutant Tulpa was a cannibal, eating even its own kind.
Again, I heard another Tulpa appear above my head. I couldn’t watch this time as the entire process repeated itself.
It was hopeless. We couldn’t escape.
And then I remembered Al drilling survival techniques into my brain.
A person who survives is a person who FIGHTS! ’F’ for First and Foremost, Face your Fear, ‘I’ for Inquire about Injuries, ‘G’ for Get good and warm, ‘H’ for handle Hunger, ‘T’ for treat Thirst, and ‘S’ for Send that Signal of Distress. Fight your fear with logic and never give into it. Take action and move on!
Logic. Take action.
I took a deep wavering breath, and raised my chin, inspired to fight back.
Rafael and Jareth had positioned themselves on either side of me. Their strong faces were determined. Fierce. Absolutely loyal. They stuck with me through thick and thin. I was grateful for their presence and their love warmed my heart.
I faced the Mutant Tulpa once again, but I couldn’t think of a single thing to do. I didn't have an inkling of how to win this encounter.
It chose that moment to expand and reaching out its black, wriggling arms, it emitted a long, low hiss and actually called my name.
“Syyyyyyyydnnneyyyyy,” it whispered in a hideous voice.
I quailed in my shoes. This was it. It really was coming for me this time and I didn’t have the slightest idea of how to defend myself.
It really was going to eat me.
Time slowed down for me then, I guess because I was certain that I really was living my last moments. I wished I could have seen Al, Betty, and the others one last time. I glanced up at Jareth and Rafael, glad they were standing with me to the end.
Looking at Rafael’s handsome face, I suddenly wanted my last conscious moments to be filled with love. I expelled my breath and then I just let everything else go, letting my feelings for him fill me from head to toe.
“That’s it, Sydney,” Jareth cried, jarring my thoughts. A tone of excitement ran through his voice. “It’s love. Love overcomes fear. This isn’t a battle of strength. We can win this thing!”
I opened my eyes, startled.
The Mutant Tulpa had drawn back sharply, reacting as if it had been burnt. It hung there, hissing and spitting like a cobra.
Could it be true? Was the Second Dimension so different a place from Earth that battles here could be won with emotions? The lizards had reacted to the word peace. The Mutant Tulpa was made of fear … could love be its antidote?
There was no doubt that it was inching away from me.
As if from a great distance, I heard Rafael’s words of encouragement, “Think of love. Remember, the many shades of love are a never-ending source of power, far stronger than fear. Fear has no place in the presence of love.”
The many shades of love. He’d told me about that before. Seizing his words, I just started thinking about the people and things that I’d come to love. I’d actually grown fond of quite a few of late, beginning with Jerry snoozing in my sweatshirt pocket, to Al in his garage, Betty, Grace, Ellison, Samantha, and ending with Rafael and Jareth standing by my side.
The Mutant Tulpa began to pant and squeal like a pig.
It was the strangest thing to watch as the golden sparkles above my head began to fly at the screeching Tulpa, joined by butterflies and creeping vines from Samantha’s inspiration towering behind us.
Tendrils of golden, pulsing light formed, tethering the Mutant Tulpa’s tentacles into place as it vainly tried to escape. After each tentacle was secured, the threads began to loop, weaving around the Mutant Tulpa to encase it in a cocoon of light. It didn’t take long before it was fully encapsulated. At first, the cocoon wiggled, but with each additional thread of light, it grew weaker, until finally, with an explosion of golden sparks that lit the night sky like a billion stars, the entire cocoon vanished.
The Mutant Tulpa was no more.
We stood there, waiting in the serene calm that followed and watched the spot where it had disappeared. Behind us, I could still hear the flutes playing in Samantha’s crystal towers.
Finally, I asked, “Is it gone … for good?”
My voice sounded unnaturally loud.
Rafael stirred at my side. “Yes,” he said with conviction. “Its fate ended there.”
I turned on him, ecstatic. As another thrilling thought began to form, I excitedly grabbed onto his arm. But his gray eyes saddened and he shook his head before I could even frame the question.
“I’m sorry, Sydney. That wasn’t your Blue Thread,” he said quickly.
I scowled a little and glanced away. “Of course it wasn’t,” I acknowledged, a trifle bitterly. “It wouldn’t be so easy, would it?”
Both Rafael and Jareth had been forced to face their inner demons with their Blue Threads. I would most likely have to do the same, even though I wasn’t even re
ally sure what my inner demon actually was.
Brushing the thoughts aside, I turned my attention back to the Mutant Tulpa’s demise. It was still kind of hard to believe it had finally met its end through love.
“Well, score one for us,” I said at last. “At least the Lizard People are going to have to start over again. It’ll knock them back a bit.”
Jareth snorted in agreement.
I turned to look at Samantha’s haven once again. “And she helped us, even here,” I said with a smile, recalling how her butterflies and vines had come to our aid.
I just stood there, admiring the beauty of the place. I really didn’t want to leave it, but I knew we had to move soon. My Blue Thread was still in existence and I guess that meant it had to do something with the Lizard People’s puppet strings. That was the only thing I knew to pursue at the moment. Like TopHat had said, I just had to concentrate on the next step. And it didn’t matter that Blondie had said the cords were indestructible. He wasn’t exactly one to be trusted.
Pointing to the channel of light running into the dark forest, I heaved a sigh and said, “Well, let’s get it over with then.”
“Right,” Rafael agreed, but his brows were creased in a worried frown.
“What is it?” I asked, concerned.
He exchanged a glance with Jareth before murmuring, “Nothing.”
I didn’t really believe him, but I didn’t press the matter further. I was sure I wouldn’t like the answer.
Forcing my feet to move away from Samantha’s creation was one of the hardest things I’d ever done. But as I did so, I couldn’t help smiling a little in admiration of her strength of spirit. She’d not only created a haven on Earth with her coffee shop, she’d created an oasis in the Second Dimension as well. And in both places, she’d helped rescue me from the Lizard People’s mad designs. She truly was a powerful being.
We headed towards the cords of light twisting away through the looming dark forest. The trees made me uneasy, so I walked close to the edge of the stream of glowing light, pausing periodically to glance around from time to time.
