10,689.231
It turned out that the dreams did in fact come. Jav wasn’t sure if that was good or bad, but he felt something akin to physical relief. He felt like he’d regained some ground and not like he was ready to burst, which was good. The more he thought about it, though, the more he saw things with Mao going in one direction and one direction only. He didn’t think he could stop himself, but at the same time he didn’t want to jeopardize the relationship he already did have with her.
He frowned throughout the morning briefing, thinking only of Mao and how he might come to terms with his feelings for her in a way that would work for them both. The briefing was all schedule and quota information, anyway, nothing he couldn’t live without. Recently, that’s all there was. He was listening carefully enough to learn that they would not be able to acquire sufficient resources from this system to rebuild the Grans, which added to his already cheerless mood. The Empire had suffered so much in so short a period of time, but then who mourns the fallen predator?
As they were finishing, he noticed Kalkin staring at him with an unusual look on his face, a look that seemed to be there a lot lately, if Jav’s imagination wasn’t getting the better of him.
“Why are you looking at me like that? First Specialist, sir,” Jav said, emphasizing the title that he almost never used.
“Like what?” Kalkin said.
Jav narrowed his eyes. “You’ve got a silly grin on your face.”
“No, no. I gave up silly grins a long time ago. They’re a thing for youth and innocence and for those who can afford them. Not me. You, on the other hand, you’ve got a visitor, I hear.”
Jav’s breath caught in his throat. No. There was no way Kalkin could possibly know what Jav had been thinking over the last few months. Telling Raus was one thing, but Kalkin knew Mao, had known Mai. Jav’s mood darkened further. He felt awful: unclean and infected with corruption.
“Whoa, easy Jav. I’m not accusing you of anything,” Kalkin said. He placed a hand on Jav’s shoulder as they exited the personnel jump deck that led from war room and directed him several meters down the corridor. Raus, just behind them, took the cue to leave them be for the time being and waited at the deck.
“Jav,” Kalkin said, so that only the two of them could hear, “no one knows anything about who you were before you joined us on 1397, but I think I know you as well as anyone can know you. I’ve watched you rise up from the bottom, suffering bullies, persevering through physical hardship and personal loss, learning and mastering one of the most difficult martial arts known to the Empire. Few people impress me, but you do. In fact, I can think of only one other person I would put into the same category. I’ll tell you about him sometime.
“What I’m trying to say is that I trust you, I respect you, and that I think you are your own worst enemy. I’m quite certain that I’m crossing a line here by saying this, but I’m your boss, so I’m entitled. I don’t know what, if anything, is going on between you and Mao Pardine. That’s between the two of you, two adults capable of making your own decisions. Just know that there’s nothing wrong with or unusual about seeking comfort in familiar places, in people you love and who love you. Whatever happens, it’ll be right.
“Now then. I’ve said my peace, and I won’t mention it again. I’ll never judge you, Jav.” Kalkin squeezed Jav’s shoulder, clapped his hand upon it, and went on his way.
Jav stood, staring at nothing with eyes wide. What the hell? How could Kalkin possibly know all that was going through his mind? Was he so transparent? Still, it meant more than he could express to know Kalkin’s feelings on the matter.
Raus approached tentatively. “Jav? What was that all about?”
“I’m really not sure,” Jav said.
“So are you going to introduce me to your dream girl before I have to go?”
Jav flinched inwardly, recovered, smiled. “Yeah, come on.”
• • •
Jav and Raus arrived at Mao’s quarters. When the door opened, she was already smiling, seeing Jav right away, but then her eyes rolled up, taking in Raus’s prodigious height—he stood almost a full meter taller than she did. She swallowed hard and then looked back to Jav.
“I could take him,” she said, nodding, her face full of resolve.
Today she wore a tight white T-shirt that did show off her lithe figure and baggy black pants cinched at the ankles, just as Jav’s gray pants were. Both wore black fabric shoes with everplastic soles.
“That won’t be necessary, Miss Pardine,” Raus said.
“And certainly not here in the corridor,” Jav added. “Mao, this is Raus Kapler, he’s the newest member of the Death Squad.”
“Oh,” she said. “Nice to meet you.”
Raus smiled. “It’s nice to meet you, too. Jav speaks very highly of you.”
She couldn’t help reddening or the quick glance she shot at Jav. He shrugged in response.
“Will you be joining us today, Specialist Kapler?” Mao said.
“Please, call me Raus. No, unfortunately, I will not. I have to continue supervising the dismantling of my Tower and see to my brother’s transfer here to the Palace.”
“Oh, I see,” she said not very convincingly.
“I will let you two get on with your kicking and punching.”
“Thanks, Raus. If you need any help at the Tower let me know,” Jav said.
“Right. See you again soon, I’m sure, Miss Pardine.”
“Bye, Raus,” she said as he took his leave. She and Jav headed in the opposite direction on their way to Jav’s rebuilt training facility. “He seems nice.”
“He is.”
They stepped into a personnel jump deck and then back out again at a completely different location.
“Oh wait, now I remember,” Mao said. “He was the one in contact with the Emperor before planetfall, right? The former king?”
“I think he prefers to have been known as a prince, but yeah, that’s right.”
“I had no idea what he was talking about, but now it makes some sense.”
“His brother’s been sick for a very long time, kept in stasis until a cure for his condition could be found.”
“And we’re going to help him with that cure?”
“Uh huh.” Jav stopped and punched a code to open a door. “Here we are.”
Mao preceded him into the room and nodded in appreciation. “Very nice, Jav,” she said.
“This is version two. The first facility didn’t survive the fight with Nanda Oslet and Olander Karza. But the technicians did a great job putting it back together.”
“Even in transit?”
Jav nodded. “It’s all standard tech. The crumbled concrete was further broken down, remixed and reset. The optical sheets were easily rendered by computer using the original program, then printed and applied to the reset columns. Right now it all sits on top of the one gravity block, but that’s enough. When possible, I’d like to get a custom 30 G block.”
Mao shook her head, smiling. “A 30 G block?”
Jav shrugged and returned her smile. He felt heat begin to rise in him. He also felt the sudden dizzying onset of deja vu, but knew that it wasn’t true deja vu. It was more like nostalgia, but even that wasn’t quite right. They weren’t on Planet 1287 and he wasn’t talking to Mai. He reigned in his thoughts and cleared his throat. “So what is your ranking now?”
She narrowed her eyes and leaned in coyly. “It’s gone up,” she said, all mysterious and conspiratorial.
“Oh?” Jav raised an eyebrow.
“Yes.”
“Well?”
In response—in a flash—she bent her knees, and pivoted, whirling her right elbow into his midsection. He doubled over and flew bodily through the first few columns rising from the gravity block, sprawling on his back.
He sat up coughing and nodded his approval. “That was very nicely done. So you’ve already got yourself a custom block, huh? I thought you maxed out a long time ago.”
She cocked her head. “Well, anger is a good motivator and I was running out of challenges with the Eight Elbows.”
“Twenty-seven,” Jav said, guessing.
Mao grinned.
“How far did you get with the Eighteen Heavenly Claws?”
“Only through the Eagle forms.”
“How about I teach you the rest?”
“Is that okay? Don’t you need Hol’s permission for that.”
Jav nodded and shrugged. “It can be our secret.”
“If you teach me the Dragon forms as payment, I’ll take that job you offered me last night.”
“Deal. You know, we’re scheduled to leave this planet at the end of the year, but there’s been unofficial talk of another Artifact Competition after we make planetfall again,” he said.
Her eyes lit up with interest and she sprang toward him, landing catlike on all fours between his legs, bringing her face very close to his. “What did you say?”
He had the willpower to make himself do a great many things—his training and accomplishments as an F-Gene fighter were evidence of that—but keeping his hands off of Mao right now when she was this close and when all he could see in her was Mai was perhaps not one of them. The only thing that prevented him from losing all control was a combination of propriety and respect for both Mao and the memory of her sister. Since her arrival, every moment in her presence had been a physical struggle, but now he was so turned on that he couldn’t prevent the tenting of his trousers. Her attention was elsewhere, though, which was good.
“Um, yes, another competition,” he fought to calm his blood while trying to look and sound casual. “With the Eighteen Heavenly Claws, the Eight Elbows, and 27 gravities behind you, you couldn’t lose.”
She stared at him for a moment, close enough for him to feel her breath coming in short little puffs. She leaned forward suddenly and kissed him on the mouth. His eyes went wide and he returned the kiss, taking hold of her and losing his balance so that she collapsed down on top of him. There was no way to hide what was between them—their pants were baggy, but thin and there was no mistake. Jav felt her press herself down upon him, grinding back and forth slowly with her body as she continued to kiss him.
As much as Jav wanted this to happen, he didn’t want it to happen right here on the gravity block where they were like two animals rushing to enter the rutting season. If he had any goodness left in him, he shouldn’t want it to happen at all. Regardless, he had enough presence of mind to think about how they might feel afterwards and so removed his arms from around her, sat up, and gently eased her off of him. As Mao backed away, once again on all fours and still between his legs, she gently sucked in some errant saliva, clearing the last of it from her lower lip with her teeth.
“What just happened, Jav?” she said.
“Something that probably shouldn’t have.”
Their eyes, hers brown, his gray, met lingeringly. Hers drifted down to what she’d felt between them, then returned to meet his again. “Really? Because that’s not what I felt just now.”
“It’s wrong Mao.”
“How is it wrong?” she said, shaking her head in anticipation of any reasons he might offer.
“How is it not?”
“Do you find me attractive?”
Jav was visibly flustered. “Yes. How could I not?”
She cocked her head, confused by the question and the incongruity of his reluctance, “But?”
“It’s not just about whether or not I find you attractive.”
“Okay, but I kissed you, remember? What followed was mutual. We’re both adults. Neither of us is forcing the other to do anything we don’t want to do.” She smiled at what appeared to be the beginning of acquiescence.
She took hold of his hands, stood up, and pulled him to his feet as well. “Start teaching me Dragon Perceives Truth. I’ll behave, I promise. But you’re going to have dinner with me in my room again tonight, and we’re going to talk about this some more.”
Jav nodded.
“Honestly, Jav,” she said good-naturedly. “I feel like I’m the adult and you’re the child.”
He laughed, adjusted his pants, and self-consciously led her by the hand to the center of the block.
• • •
They sat at the too-small table in Mao’s room, a small assortment of food between them.
“You did well today,” Jav said.
“Thanks. You’re a good teacher.” Mao watched his face carefully, seeing the reaction she expected to see, a painful memory or a pang of guilt perhaps. She knew he was thinking of Mai, the person who’d been largely responsible for his own training, the person who’d taught him Dragon Perceives Truth. She thought she understood what was bothering him now.
“Mao. . .”
She blinked at him expectantly.
“Mao, I don’t want there to be any misunderstandings. You’re being here means everything to me, but you have to also understand how difficult it is for me.”
She scooted her chair up and brought her face exceedingly close to his. “Why? Because I remind you of someone? Because you still think I’m a child? Because it might offend someone who’s been dead for two years? I’ve felt your eyes on me since I arrived, Jav. I felt something else more substantial this morning. I know that I look like her. I can’t help that, though. In other circumstances it might bother me, but quite frankly, I’m glad that I do.”
Jav said nothing.
“What is it you want, Jav? Permission? Forgiveness? I’ve known you since I was thirteen. I watched you overtake me in the Eighteen Heavenly Claws. I’ve seen you save lives without a care for your own. I’ve seen you bend and reduce space with your fingers. Being in your presence, how could I not have had a crush on you? How could any girl not?” Her eyes grew heavy with moisture. “But it’s not just a crush anymore. Last year you told me to live if only because Mai couldn’t. Now, more than ever, I want to be yours because she can’t. I love you, Jav. And if what you need me to be is Mai’s surrogate, then let’s have no more excuses. I’m not a child anymore. I’ve thought about this; for the last year I’ve thought of little else. I have no misconceptions and no misgivings. I want this.”
Jav shook his head softly. “I’m sorry.”
Time stopped for her. She had seen a way out for both of them, one that would work. Surely he could see it, too. She’d waited a year, running the scenario over and over in her head, a scenario that always ended happily for the both of them. She would have waited longer if necessary, but he had brought her here, had looked on her with obvious and welcome desire. He wasn’t going to deny them what they both wanted—what they both needed—was he?
He reached out for her then, burying his face in her neck, breathing deeply the scent of her lightly perfumed hair.
She still didn’t know. Was this goodbye?
But then his lips were upon her, tickling her neck first then moving up to press against her own lips. From deep within she felt all the tension and anxiety set free, released in an orgasmic rush. Alert and sensitive to his slightest touch now, her breath came erratically, but she managed to say, through their kisses, “For this you don’t need to apologize. Ever.”
12. THE FIRE KING
Year of the Church 1083
(10,690.024)
Suur Cathedral was all the civilization that could be found on Suur Island. The spectacular scenery and unchanging tropical weather had appealed to Iiken Hassur who, at the venerable age of eighty-nine, in Year of the Church 876, spent all of his considerable fortune purchasing the island and establishing the cathedral upon it. Beyond this aid to the Church, he could not help but indulge his ego when Suur sounded so much like his own name. There was no connection, but that didn’t matter to him. Almost immediately, the island and the cathedral became synonymous with the old man who was largely responsible for promoting the fighting circuit, building it into the exceedingly lucrative Three-World enterprise that it had become. He lived out his final
days on the island, seeing some of the first great circuit fighters produced right there in what he considered his namesake.
Garlin Braams’s father had been a circuit fan, but had not been a part of the Church. Braams had grown up immersed in his father’s enthusiasm, knew all the greats from years past—Haalan Mohs, Uusin Feleno, Allos Vesta, even, or most especially, Sorjinn Braams—and knew of course of Iiken Hassur, the man responsible, according to his father, for all of it. His father had been fond of saying that Iiken Hassur was a business man, a Church man, a great man. His temperament being what it was, Braams eagerly shared his father’s enthusiasm, respecting his views and his words with all the might of a loving child. At the local Cathedral, Braams surpassed all of his fellows, grasping the concepts quickly and earning a recommendation to pursue Entitlement before his compulsory studies were complete. For the Braams family, there was no question about acceptance or of where the boy would be sent: Suur Cathedral awaited.
That was nineteen years ago. Braams had entered Suur Cathedral younger and smaller than any others then or before him, but neither his age nor his size would hinder him. Though the difference in age between him and his peers would always remain, he soon grew and excelled among the adults as he had among the children. His affinity for fire was not unique, but his mastery over it soon proved to be. Most whose Haloes manifest themselves as fire employ simple combustion, controlled, directed, and malleable, but combustion nonetheless. Braams was easily capable of effecting combustion, but to him it was just that: easy, a trick, nothing of note. This frustrated a number of his peers, as they struggled to produce even the thinnest smoke, and yet there were few if any who begrudged him his ability. He was affable and always willing to help with encouragement or with advice. When he took up his study of the aspect of the tiger, there were some less skilled in the Secrets who allowed themselves a bit too much freedom, often beating him black and blue, sometimes bloody, but Braams never complained. He learned his lessons well. His affability never wavered, but his skill in all things gave birth to a kind of arrogance for which no one could realistically criticize him.
The Blood Solution (Approaching Infinity Book 3) Page 18
