by Pamela Bauer
“Maybe, but she’s not happy here, is she?”
He rubbed a hand across his chin. “No, she’s not. I’m just not sure if I’m comfortable with her being so far away. I am responsible for her.”
“You could go along. Take Kevin and make a vacation out of it.”
“And be away from you?” The look on his face told her what he thought of that idea.
It was the perfect opportunity to bring up the subject of their relationship. “It might be good for us to have some time apart.”
“Good to be away from you? Not funny, Dena,” he drawled. “Please, don’t try to make a joke out of this.”
“I’m not. I’m serious.”
That brought his head around with a jerk.
She turned away from him, unable to look him in the eye. “I wanted to tell you this last night, but Leonie came home and…” She took a deep breath before continuing. “When we started dating we agreed that our relationship wouldn’t be serious, that there’d be no talk of the future.”
“But things have changed between us,” he said quietly.
“They’ve changed for you.” She still didn’t look at him.
There was dead silence except for the faint ticking of her clock. Then he spoke. “Are you saying you’re not in love with me?”
She couldn’t lie to him. “No. I’m just not ready for…” She struggled to steady her nerves.
“For what? Commitment?” he asked soberly.
“We agreed there would be no demands, no promises,” she said weakly.
He just stood staring at her. She glanced at his face, and her stomach balled into a knot. She wanted to kiss away the pain she saw there, but she knew she couldn’t let herself do it.
He walked toward the door and opened it, pausing to say, “My mistake.” Then he left.
A chill crossed her body. The door closed behind him, creating a sound that was as hollow as the feeling in her stomach.
DURING THE NEXT HOUR she looked at the clock repeatedly, wondering how she was ever going to get through the next few weeks if she couldn’t even get through an hour without thinking about Quinn. She was about to slip on her shoes and go for a walk when there was an urgent knock at her door.
Automatically her heart moved into her throat as she wondered if it could be Quinn. When she opened the door and saw him standing there, she felt a rush of desire so strong it frightened her. He looked terrible, his face white, his eyes weary.
“I didn’t expect to see you,” she said to him.
“I need your help. Sara’s gone.”
“What do you mean gone?”
“I took Kevin for a bike ride. She stayed here to do her homework. When we got back, she was gone.”
“Maybe she went to a friend’s house.”
He shook his head. “She left this note.”
Dena read the message scribbled on the piece of lined notebook paper. In it she had written that she was going back to where she belonged. “You think she’s going to try to find a way to get to South Carolina?”
He nodded. “I need to find her. Will you help me?”
“Of course. Let me grab my keys,” she said, turning back into her room to reach for her purse. “Did she have any money?”
He nodded. “Do you know what happens to runaway girls?”
She could see the fear in his eyes. She put a hand on his arm and said, “She’s going to be all right, Quinn. She’s not a runaway. She just wants to go see her friends and familiar places.”
“She’s got to be either at the bus depot or the train station. She can’t get on a plane without an ID. We’ll need to check both places.”
She nodded. “We’ll get Krystal to help us. What about notifying the police?”
“I’ve already called. I’ve got a friend in the department. Right now our best bet is to find her before anything happens.”
Dena agreed.
CHAPTER TWELVE
WHILE QUINN WENT to the bus depot, Krystal headed to the train station and Dena got in her car to search the neighborhood streets, hoping that the twelve-year-old was on foot and hadn’t climbed into a car with a total stranger. After combing several blocks, she was beginning to think it was a hopeless cause. Then she saw her.
Her backpack was slung over her shoulder as she walked, her dark hair flying in the breeze. Dena wanted to honk her horn to get her attention, but she worried that if she did, the girl would flee. She drove up ahead to the next block, parked her car and called Quinn on his cell phone.
“It’s me. I found her,” she said as soon as he answered.
“Thank God,” he said on a long sigh. “Where are you? I’ll come get her.”
“Why don’t you let me bring her home,” she suggested.
“Is she there? Let me speak to her.”
“She’s coming up the block but she hasn’t seen me yet. Look, I gotta go. Call Krystal and tell her we found her. I’ll meet you back at the house.”
“Are you sure you can get her to go back with you?”
“If I can’t, I’ll call you.” Then she clicked off, waiting for Sara to come closer. She watched her progress in the rearview mirror, and as soon as Sara was even with her front fender, she hopped out.
“Sara!” she called.
The girl turned. For a brief moment she looked paralyzed with fear, then she began to slowly walk backward. She looked around, as if trying to judge which direction she should run.
“Sara, please don’t run away,” Dena begged.
“I’m not running away. I’m going home,” she told her, still moving backward slowly.
Dena walked toward her. “You mean South Carolina?”
“I don’t belong here and I don’t want to stay with Quinn.”
“But your dad made Quinn your guardian. He wanted you to be with him,” she argued.
“I think it was a mistake. I should be in South Carolina. When it rains in June there it’s a warm rain. It’s cold here…a lot.”
“I know. And I think you should go back to South Carolina this summer, too. I even told Quinn that.”
She looked at her suspiciously. “You did?”
Dena nodded. “Just tonight. I told him you probably have friends you could stay with in South Carolina. You do, don’t you?”
She nodded. “But Quinn would never let me go. He’s the one who made me stay here when all I wanted was to go home.”
“He had to keep you here with him. He’s your legal guardian now,” she said for the second time.
“He’s acting like he’s my father, and he’s not. He’ll never be my father.”
It had started to rain and a cool wind had arisen. Dena had an umbrella in her car, but she worried that if she tried to get it, Sara would run. “Why don’t you come sit with me in the car and we’ll talk. If we stay out here we’re going to get wet.”
“No, I’m going to leave. You can’t stop me,” she warned, although Dena noticed she had stopped moving her feet.
“I’ll tell you what. If you’ll give me fifteen minutes in the car, I promise I won’t try to stop you. I just want to talk to you.”
She eyed her suspiciously. “You won’t drive me back to Leonie’s?”
“Not unless you want me to,” she answered, hoping she wasn’t making a promise she couldn’t keep.
Thunder cracked and the rain became heavier. “Sara, I’m getting really wet,” Dena called out, a plea in her voice.
“All right,” she finally conceded and pulled her backpack from her shoulder so she could climb into the car.
Once inside, Dena started the engine and Sara’s hand flew to the door handle.
“I’m not going anywhere, Sara! I just want to get us a little heat so we’ll dry off. See?” She raised her hands. “I’ll keep my hands off the wheel.”
Sara watched her closely, mistrust in her eyes. “You’re not going to talk me into staying.”
Dena knew it was going to be an uphill battle to say something to convince her.
There was only one thing she thought that may have some impact on her actions. “I wanted to tell you something not many people know,” she began.
“Does Quinn know?”
She shook her head. “It’s something I don’t like to talk about because it’s painful.”
“Then why do you want to tell me?”
“Because I think it might help you.”
She wrapped her arms across her chest. “I don’t need any help. I’ll be fine if I go back to South Carolina.”
Dena didn’t argue the point, but said, “I know what it’s like to lose your mother, Sara. When I was thirteen I lost mine.”
Her eyes narrowed. “She died?”
“No, she just decided one day that she didn’t want to be my mother and she left.” Dena had to swallow to get rid of the lump that memory still produced. “She moved far away, leaving me and brother in the care of my father, and I never heard from her again.”
“Why would she do that?”
“I don’t know,” she answered honestly, because to this day she didn’t understand how a mother could turn her back on her own children. Dena had heard all the suppositions people had made—that she was in love with another man, that she’d run off to pursue the stage career she’d always wanted, that she’d become tangled up in drugs. All had been unsubstantiated rumors.
“What did you do?”
“I went looking for her.”
“You did? Where did you go?”
“She used to always talk about this friend she had when she was young, a woman named Trudy. She lived in Des Moines—that was about an hour away from where I lived. My mother told me she and Trudy had always said that someday they’d travel around the world. I thought maybe that’s what she was planning to do, so I got on a bus and went to Des Moines.”
“Did you find her?”
“No. I did find Trudy, though. She called my dad and he came and picked me up.”
“Did you get into trouble?”
Dena grimaced at the memory. “Oh, yeah. He sent me away to boarding school after that.” She shuddered at how clear that day was in her mind.
“And you haven’t seen your mom since?”
“No. So you see, Sara, I know how bad the pain is when you lose someone you love,” Dena said softly. “At the time you think you’ll never stop hurting, that you’ll never get over missing them.”
Sara looked down at her hands, which she had clasped in her lap. “I won’t,” she said in a choked whisper.
Dena reached across the seat and put her hand on her shoulder. “Probably not, but the pain will hurt a little bit less as time goes by. You need to believe me when I say that. And you also need to let the people who care about you help you get through this painful time in your life.”
“I know,” she said in a voice choked with emotion. “That’s why I want to go back to South Carolina.”
“I know you have friends there who care about you,” she said in understanding.
“Then will you help me get back home?” She looked at her with a hopeful look in her eyes.
She sighed. “I can’t put you on a bus without talking to someone in South Carolina. How about if you come back with me to 14 Valentine Place tonight, and tomorrow we’ll sit down and plan out a safe trip for you.”
When Sara didn’t respond, Dena said, “Sara, if you’re worried about what Quinn will say, you don’t need to be. I’m certain he’ll take you to South Carolina this summer. I’m just surprised he didn’t mention that we discussed it when he got back from my place.”
She looked down at her hands. “He did say he wanted to talk to me after he took Kevin on his bike ride, but he seemed so crabby I thought he was going to tell me something bad.”
Guilt surged through Dena at the thought that she was responsible for his mood. “Then he was planning to tell you.” The windshield wipers beat in a steady tempo as the rain poured down. “You don’t really want to start your journey on a night like this, do you?”
“No,” she said weakly.
“Then I can take you home?”
“14 Valentine Place isn’t my home,” she said. “I don’t even have a real bed.”
“I tell you what. How about if you sleep at my place tonight? You can have my bed.”
“Where will you sleep?”
“On my sofa. It pulls out into a bed. And I have a screen that separates my bedroom from the rest of my apartment so you’ll have privacy. No little brother will walk in on you in the morning.”
“You really want me to?”
Dena squeezed her shoulder. “It would make me feel better if you’d come home with me, Sara. Will you?”
She didn’t answer immediately, then said in a near whisper, “All right.”
They were two words that sent relief rushing through Dena. “Okay. To my place then,” she said, and put the car in gear.
BECAUSE QUINN HAD BEEN at the bus depot in downtown Minneapolis, Dena was able to get back home and have Sara settled in her bed before he arrived. When he showed up at her door, he looked exhausted.
“Where is she?” he asked as soon as Dena opened the door.
She put her fingers to her lips indicating they should be quiet. “She’s asleep,” she whispered, nodding toward the screen. “Why don’t you just leave her here for tonight? I don’t mind.”
“Are you sure?”
“It’s no problem. Really. Where’s Kevin?”
“He fell asleep in Jason’s room downstairs, so Leonie said I should leave him with her.”
She nodded in understanding.
“Do you mind if I just check on her?” he asked, looking past her shoulder.
She opened the door wider and gestured for him to come in. He crossed the room and poked his head around the room divider. When he turned back to Dena, there were fewer lines on his face.
“Where did you find her?” he asked.
She motioned for him to follow her outside to the landing. Then she gently pulled the door shut behind them.
“Over on Snelling. She told me she was on her way to South Carolina, but I don’t think she had made a plan to get there,” Dena told him.
“Thank God you found her,” he said, closing his eyes. “When I thought of all the horrible things that could happen to her…” He shuddered and Dena placed a hand on his arm.
“It didn’t happen. She’s safe.”
He sighed. “I’m supposed to be protecting her, not chasing her away.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself. You have to remember that she’s suffered a terrible loss. She’s homesick and wants to see her friends. I told her you would take her to South Carolina.”
He nodded. “If we need to stay there until her aunt takes over, then that’s what we’ll have to do. I don’t want to risk anything happening to her during these last two weeks of my guardianship.”
“I think that’s a good idea,” Dena agreed.
“Thank you for what you did this evening,” he said to her, gazing at her in that way she’d always found so compelling.
“I was glad to help out.”
“I don’t know what you said to her, but whatever it was, it got her back here.”
“We can talk tomorrow. I’ll see you at breakfast?” she asked, putting a hand on her doorknob to indicate she was going to go back inside.
“Yeah. Tomorrow at breakfast,” he concurred, then headed up the stairs.
She watched him walk away, wishing she could call him back. She wanted desperately to take him in her arms and kiss away the worry lines on his face, but she knew she couldn’t. Not after what had happened between them earlier that night. Instead of comforting each other, they were alone. Tears trickled down her cheeks as she stepped back inside.
DENA MOVED QUIETLY as she made the love seat into a bed, tucking the linens beneath the mattress and spreading a quilt over the top. All she needed was a pillow and she’d be ready to climb under the covers. As she craned her neck around the room divider, she saw th
at Sara was only using one of the two on her bed, which meant Dena could take the other.
As she did, however, a small wooden jewelry box went tumbling to the floor. As Dena picked it up, the top flopped open and its contents spilled onto the carpet.
Scattered on the floor were a locket, two rings, several old coins, a charm bracelet, a rabbit’s foot, a photograph and a small stack of air mail letters tied together with a piece of pink ribbon. The photo was a family picture of Sara, Kevin and their parents. Dena felt a tug on her heart as she stared at the smiling faces. She put the photo back into the wooden box, then reached for the other items. When she picked up the stack of letters, she saw that the top one was addressed to a Patsy Martin at a University of Minnesota address. The postmark was dated thirteen years ago.
Dena knew that Sara’s mother’s name was Patsy and assumed Martin had been her birth name. She wondered why Sara would be carrying around a letter addressed to her mother. She looked at the return address and saw that it was from a Carolyn Martin. She thumbed through the stack and saw they all were from her.
Dena figured she was either Patsy’s sister or her mother. Dena returned them to the carved box and set it on her dresser top, thinking that tomorrow she’d asked Sara about the letters. If there was another relative on Patsy’s side, Quinn needed to know.
DENA WAS AT HER PC when Sara awoke the following morning. “Good morning,” she said as the sleepy-eyed girl staggered toward her.
“I had a box under the pillow,” the twelve-year-old said, concern furrowing her brow, one arm pointing toward the bed.
“I know. It fell to the floor when I had to borrow the pillow last night, so I put in on my dresser.”
Dena noticed Sara wasted no time in getting it or in opening it. Out of the corner of her eye Dena could see her checking its contents. Then she put the box into her backpack and zipped it shut.
Dena got up and walked over to the bed, sitting down next to her. “Sara, when the box landed on the floor the contents fell out.”
A look of panic crossed her face. “You didn’t read the letters, did you?”
“No. I wouldn’t do that. They weren’t addressed to me,” Dena said in a soft voice. “Were they your mother’s letters?”
