by Pandora Pine
Griff’s jaws snapped shut and he sat back down silently.
“If you’re going to fire Drake for having a secret, then you’ll have to fire me too. I don’t just have one secret. I’ve got hundreds. Hell, maybe even thousands.” He turned his attention to Presley. “If I tell you the story of one mission into Baghdad where I killed ten civilians with my bare hands are you gonna tell me to fuck off too, Pres?”
Pres’ mouth dropped open as he shook his head no. This wasn’t the way he’d envisioned this conversation with Gregor going. He’d assumed Gregor would be on his side.
“JFC, I love you all like brothers, but I keep my secrets because they’re too ugly, too shameful to share with anyone.” Gregor held his hands up hands in front of him, turning them from front to back. “I don’t want anyone to know what these hands have done in service to our country. I keep my secrets partially because it’s treason if I don’t, but also because I’m protecting myself. Just like Drake was protecting himself.”
Presley chanced a look at Drake who was still standing at the back of the kitchen with his arms wrapped around himself. Leo had a hand resting on the crook of his elbow.
“Drake, you think you’re in the wrong for keeping your former career a secret from Presley, but what if Pres is the one who’s wrong for flying off the handle and not giving you a chance to tell the story of how you ended up in that situation?”
Drake sucked in a harsh breath. He looked like he was blinking back tears.
Presley understood where Gregor was coming from, but his friend was wrong. He had every right to fly off the handle, but maybe he should have given Drake a chance to explain things today when it could have just been the two of them instead of everyone being here to witness this scene.
“I admit I’ve been a huge dick from the moment I met you, Drake. I was pissy and bitter that another one of my friends had the love of his life knock on his front door. Over the last few weeks, I’ve watched the two of you turn your physical attraction into something built to last. I know you’re angry, Pres, but you need to ask yourself if this one bump in the road is enough to throw away happily ever after with the man of your dreams.” Gregor took a deep breath and looked over at Drake. “You’ve led a hard life, Drake, from growing up in foster care to losing your dream of becoming an actor, but you’ve found a home here at Sand Dollar Shoal and a family who loves you. Think long and hard before you walk away from that.”
What did Gregor mean? Was Drake really contemplating leaving the hotel for good? Where would he go? Where would he live? Who would love him? Not that Presley cared, especially about the last one.
“There are a few key facts you need to know, Pres. Facts that I think everyone needs to know. Drake and I sat at this table last night and had a long talk. What he told me was enough for me to believe that my faith in him is totally justified. I, for one, don’t want you to leave the hotel, Drake, but I can’t speak for everyone else. Why don’t you make your case?”
Drake nodded and took a deep breath. “I went to California to become an actor and ended up meeting Donovan Charles and Galen Roberts when I waited on their table. Donovan owns Nasty Boys Productions, which produces gay porn. To make a long story short, he gave me his card and after an audition, hired me to work for his film company. I never wanted to do porn, I just fell into it figuring I could go on other interviews for real acting jobs on the side. I didn’t realize I’d have to sign an exclusivity agreement with Nasty Boys.”
“Why did you get out of the business?” Landon asked softly.
Drake went to the kitchen counter and grabbed a manila folder. He took a piece of paper out of it and handed it to Landon. “I got that letter seven months ago saying that one of the Nasty Boys had tested HIV positive.”
Presley bounced out of his chair. “Jesus fucking Christ, Drake! You have HIV?” He backpedaled, knocking into the kitchen sink, his face as white as a sheet. This was his worst fear come to life. Over the last few weeks, Presley had swallowed countless loads of come and he’d allowed Drake to come in his ass without a condom. He was totally fucked.
Noble got up after Pres and pulled him back to his chair. “Let Drake tell the whole story, Pres. I can’t believe he would have ever done anything that would have put you in danger.
Reluctantly, Pres sat back down and took the letter from Landon. He quickly scanned the contents, thinking to himself how terrifying it must have been for Drake to have gotten this in the mail one day out of the blue. Hell, he knew exactly how Drake must have felt that day. He was experiencing the same thing right now.
“Once I got over the shock of the letter, I broke my contract with Nasty Boys. The adult film industry requires its talent to get HIV tested every two weeks, but it can take up to four months before a positive test result to show up on a test.”
“No prophylactics?” Leo asked
Drake shook his head. “There was a bill proposed in California last year that would require all adult film actors to wear condoms, as well as using dental dams during oral sex, but thanks to heavy protesting from the industry, the bill was voted down.”
“Jesus Christ, so every time you went to work, you were literally taking your life in your hands.” Leo stood up and took Drake’s hand before dragging him and his chair next to Griff.
Drake offered him a small smile and nodded. “Anyway, after I resigned, I kept to the two week schedule of getting tested. I did that for six months, just to be sure the test results were right. I would tape every negative test result to the fridge and then wait for the next two weeks to go by and then start the process all over again until I got the last negative test back.”
Presley felt all of the blood drain out of his face. He’d just accused Drake of having HIV in front of everyone and Drake was negative. For as mad as he’d been over the last thirty-six hours, he was equally ashamed now.
Drake picked up the manila folder and set it in front of Presley. “All twelve of my negative test results are in there, along with my negative results for gonorrhea and other STIs.” Drake paced back over to the wall and stared down at his feet. “I figured that I’d been given a second chance to live my life the way I wanted to live it. I sold my condo and bought a map of the United States. I made a deal with myself that I’d throw a dart at it and move to wherever the dart struck unless it hit California.”
Noble snorted. “The dart hit Hyannis, Massachusetts?”
“Actually it hit closer to Provincetown, but the night I got here it was raining so hard that I needed to get off the highway. I saw the sign for Sand Dollar Shoal and tried to find my way here, but that’s when I hit the puddle that stalled my car. I could see a light on from the main road and I ran toward it, hoping whoever lived there would be kind enough to help a total stranger.
“My light,” Presley said softly, daring to look up at Drake. His face was filled with pain.
Drake nodded. “You all know the rest of the story from there, except for Leo.”
Leo turned in his seat to face Drake. “My stars, you two fell into a whirlwind romance. I didn’t have to see it happen to know that it did.”
Smiling sadly, Drake sighed. “That’s exactly what happened. For the first time in my life, I felt like I’d found a family. You all took me in and made me feel like I belong here. I can never say thank you enough for that. I’m so sorry that I lied to you all. I know you don’t believe me, Pres, but I was going to tell you the truth after the unmasking. I was going to drag you out the door and back to the cabin and just spill my guts. I never guessed that those guys at the party would recognize me. I’m sorry I hurt you, Pres.” A rogue tear slid down Drake’s face which he batted away. “I think the best thing for me to do is leave. I don’t want to come between any of you.” He turned to Griff. “Pres knows the password to my computer, so he’ll be able to access anything you’ll need from there.” Nodding to Gregor, Drake walked out of the house.
Pres simply sat there and watched him go. None of this felt real. He fe
lt frozen in time.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Presley Aaron Forrester?” Gregor shouted, startling Leo who grabbed on to Griffin. “After all that you’re just going to let him walk out of your life without a single word?”
Presley didn’t know what to say. He looked up at Gregor with his mouth opening and closing, but with no sound coming out.
“I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m not accepting his resignation,” Griff said.
“Me either,” Gregor agreed with a smile.
“Neither do Landon and me,” Noble smiled.
“What about you, Leo?”
“I shouldn’t get a vote, but none-the-less, I don’t accept Drake’s resignation either. Further, he can share my cottage when my two weeks in the Hiraeth room end.”
“That’s makes it nearly unanimous, Pres.” Gregor crossed his arms over his chest.
Wordlessly, Pres got up from his chair and headed toward the door. He had no idea what he was going to say to Drake, but he needed to at least say something.
XX
Drake was crying so hard that he couldn’t see the zipper on his black suitcase. He’d managed to get it up on the bed, but now he couldn’t get the damn thing open to pack his things. He sighed and walked over to the bedside table to grab a tissue.
He sat down hard and tried to take some deep breaths. What he needed to do was get himself back under control so he could get packing and then get gone. Being here in Presley’s house, knowing he’d never hold him again was pure torture.
As hard as it had been, Drake had told everyone the whole truth. He’d given Presley all of his medical paperwork and apologized with his whole heart. It was obviously not enough since Presley hadn’t said one word to him. Pres had barely even looked at him.
He hoped it would be like the movies where he’d turned to go and Presley would grab his arm and beg him to stay, but real life was never like the movies. Drying his tears, he got up from the bed and was finally able to get his suitcase unzipped. Opening the closet door, he pulled out the few dress shirts he had.
“Drake?”
Presley’s voice startled him. He spun around to see his ex-lover standing in the bedroom door. “I’ll be out of your way in a few minutes. I don’t have a lot of things to pack. The spare key to the cottage is on the kitchen table.”
“None of the guys accepted your resignation,” Presley said softly.
Under any other circumstance, Drake would have been elated, but right now, all that mattered to him was Presley. His ex-lover hadn’t said how he voted. He took a blue striped dress shirt off its hanger and folded it neatly. “What about you?”
Presley said nothing.
Turning around, Drake took a good look at the love of his life. Pres looked like shit. He had dark circles under his eyes and his shirt was wrinkled beyond repair as if it hadn’t been ironed and he’d been wearing it for a week straight. Of course the way Pres looked was Drake’s fault. He set the hanging shirts in his open suitcase and sat down on the bed. “I’m sorry I lied to you, Pres. I should have been a big enough man to tell you the truth from the beginning. It’s no excuse, but I’ve been discarded so many times in my life I just didn’t want that to happen again before you got to know me. The real me.”
“The real you was an adult film star.” Presley cringed as if saying those words caused him physical pain.
Drake shook his head miserably. He vowed to be honest about his old life from here on out so that nothing like this would ever happen again. He’d had enough pain in the last two days to last him a lifetime. “I’d like to think there’s more to me than just my old job, but yeah, you’re right.”
“You never treated me like that.”
“Like what?” Drake was confused.
“Like I was a co-star in one of your movies.” Pres wrapped his arms around himself.
Drake snorted, laughing for the first time in two days. “Guys think going to work and fucking for a living is a dream life. Well, it isn’t. Not that you want to know the details, but it’s tedious with all the cameras all over the place and Donovan shouting out directions on how to move my hips or suck faster or harder…” Drake trailed off. “I can’t tell you how many nights I went home with a sore cock and how I limped for days after shooting scenes with Galen Roberts. Not to mention my personal life.”
“What do you mean?” A curious look lit Presley’s face.
“Everyone wants to fuck a porn star, but no one wants to be in a relationship with one.” Drake shrugged. “Not that I blamed guys for not wanting to be my boyfriend. I wouldn’t have wanted to date me either. It was a lonely life. After being in the business for a while, it got so I didn’t want to have sex with anyone outside of work. You changed all that for me.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Before I met you, I felt dead inside, like I’d sold my soul and was just an empty shell of a man. You made me feel happy to be me. You were the first man I wanted to kiss in six years. You were a lot of firsts, like the first man who kissed me without getting a paycheck.” Drake shrugged and stood back up. “I think you were the first man who ever loved me, Pres, and for that, I’ll always be so thankful. You proved that I wasn’t just some throw away person. I’ll never forget what loving you felt like in here.” Drake tapped a hand over his heart.
He’d been wrong to think this wasn’t something out of Hollywood. This was just like the movies, with Presley leaning against the doorframe with a sad look on his face while he packed his things. Only in the movies, the wronged man forgives his lover. Drake knew that would never happen now.
“I’m sorry too, Drake,” Pres said simply.
Drake nodded and turned away from him. He couldn’t take much more of this before he’d end up crying again. There would be time for tears once he was in the car and away from Sand Dollar Shoal.
“I was a total dick last night and again today. I should have given you a chance to say your piece. I’ve never been that angry or that hurt in my life and I didn’t know how to handle that.”
“I wouldn’t have known how to handle it either.” Drake’s usual way of handling pain and rejection was to bottle it all up and not let anyone see his emotions. He hadn’t been able to do that in this situation. He guessed that was what being in love did to him.
Pres stepped into the bedroom and set a trembling hand on Drake’s arm. “Don’t go, Drake. I don’t accept your resignation either.”
Biting his lip, Drake nodded. He could feel tears threatening to fall again.
“Can you forgive me for being such a giant dick?” Pres smiled up at him, resting a hand against the side of his face.
Drake barked out a rough laugh. “Only if you can forgive me for making a living off my giant dick.”
“I forgive you, Drake.” Pres stood up on tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek.
Wrapping his arms around Presley, Drake held him tight. He never thought he’d get a chance to hold his lover again. “I love you so much. I promise if you give us another chance, I’ll never lie to you again.”
“I know you won’t, sweetheart, and I promise never to be a judgey bastard ever again.”
Drake snorted. “Don’t go making promises you can’t keep, Pres.”
Pres rolled his eyes. “Take me to bed, Drake.”
Drake pressed a kiss to Presley’s lips. “I will but not for sex. Neither of us got any sleep last night. There will be plenty of time for making up later.”
Pres nodded and started tugging Drake toward the bedroom, when a knock on the door stopped them. “Who is it?”
“Uh, it’s Leo!” he shouted from the other side of the door. “Griffin informs me that since I’m the newbie, his word, not mine, it’s my responsibility to find out if Drake will be remaining at the hotel.”
“YES!” Pres shouted and dragged Drake away from the door.
Drake followed behind Presley, his heart nearly full to bursting. Now that he’d been given a second chance, there was n
o way he was ever going to let Presley go.
EPILOGUE
June…
It was a rare afternoon off for Presley and Drake. Wednesdays were usually the slowest day of the week for guest check-ins before things ramped up for the weekend starting on Thursday afternoon.
Thanks to Drake’s marketing strategies, all of their rooms were booked solid through Columbus Day weekend which was the last weekend Sand Dollar Shoal would be open for the season.
The only idea Drake had proposed to the others that hadn’t gotten off the ground yet was his plan to make the hotel a destination wedding spot. Presley had thought of a plan that would launch Drake’s idea into orbit.
Before heading down to the beach with his boyfriend, Presley had stopped into the kitchen to pick up the picnic lunch he’d asked Gregor to make for them. Beach picnics had been another idea Drake had and the guests had gone so crazy for the idea that Gregor had to keep ordering more baskets to keep up with customer demand.
“What a gorgeous day!” Drake was spreading out the red plaid blanket embroidered with the hotel’s logo, while Pres was watching his lover’s muscles ripple under his tee shirt.
Drake grinned, settling himself on the blanket and reaching out for the basket. “I still don’t understand how we got the afternoon off.”
Presley joined him on the blanket, taking a minute to kiss his full, red lips. It had been smooth sailing for him and Drake since they’d made up from their fight. Every time Pres pictured Drake packing his suitcase, he felt sick to his stomach. He hated being more than a few feet away from Drake. Thank goodness, Griff had moved his office so Drake could have the one next to his own.
“Promise you won’t get mad at me, but we didn’t exactly get the afternoon off. I just thought this was a better place for our business meeting than in my stuffy office.”
Drake snorted and blew a loud raspberry against the side of Presley’s neck. “Only you could turn a day at the beach into a business meeting.”
