by Joe O'Brien
‘Are there any puke bags in the back of this yoke, or what?’
That was too much for Jonathon – he burst out laughing and Danny joined in, raising the back seat noise above Larry’s music.
Suddenly Larry turned off the music.
‘We’re here!’ he announced, turning a corner into a cul-de-sac, and he opened Danny’s window so as to give Danny a good, clear view of his new surroundings.
‘Better view than the one earlier, Jonathon!’ bragged Larry.
Danny had been enjoying looking out at the tall, bushy oak trees that lined the paths and the huge detached mansions behind their black pointed railings until Larry made that smart comment.
Danny pressed the button and his window came up. Jonathon noticed his reaction. His father had hurt his cousin, who he was just beginning to really like, and that made Jonathon properly ashamed of his father.
‘Your new home, Danny, well – temporary new home!’ said Larry as two very tall and very wide black iron gates automatically opened and the x5 slowly crunched along the gravel driveway of number ten Aylesbridge Close, up to a house that looked to Danny as big as a hotel.
‘Wow!’ gasped Danny and he looked at Jonathon and smiled.
Regina came down the granite steps with Earl, her shitzu, in her arms.
As soon as Danny opened the door, Heffo jumped out and ran across the driveway and leapt up onto Regina’s dress barking his brains out at Earl.
Earl snarled down at Heffo, as if to say, Shut it, mongrel, this is my home!
Danny grabbed Heffo and apologised to his aunt who was shaking like a leaf. ‘Jonathon, bring Daniel around the side to the garage, and make up a bed for his dog!’ instructed Larry.
‘Yes, Dad!’ said Jonathon promptly. He knew that Danny was off to a bad start already.
‘What about my stuff, Uncle Larry?’ asked Danny while trying to muzzle Heffo under his armpit.
Larry gave Danny one of the looks that he was getting very familiar with, very quickly.
‘I’ll get it later, I suppose,’ he said, and set off after his cousin.
Jonathon and Danny made a cosy bed for Heffo out of a cardboard box and an old picnic blanket that was just lying around in the garage.
‘You lay down there, Heffo,’ said Danny. ‘I’ll bring you for a walk later.’ Then he looked at Jonathon and laughed. ‘We probably won’t even have to leave this place for a walk, it’s that big.’
Danny stared all around at the gardens as Jonathon led him to the back door of the house.
He had never seen a place like this before. It was like something his granny would watch on one of her boring ‘great houses and their gardens’ programmes.
There were at least three lawns, not just one, and long, high, old, stone walls covered in thick, fleshy ivy surrounded the gardens.
There were granite steps leading up to the first lawn and a winding cobbled pathway curved around the dense, shrubby borders and then cut across the centre of the lawn to a big, mossy, cobbled circle with a large bronze statue of a boy and a girl holding an umbrella; crystal clear water was trickling down their umbrella and gently splashing into the pool that surrounded them.
‘Wow!’ gasped Danny to Jonathon. Danny had never given two hoots about gardens or fountains or, well, things that only grown-ups thought about, but then he had never seen such a beautiful place as this, and to imagine that people actually lived here, was unimaginable to Danny.
‘Would you like to see the tennis court?’ asked Jonathon. He didn’t mean to brag like his father would, he was just trying to be a good, polite host to his cousin.
‘No way!’ said Danny. ‘You have a tennis court?’
Jonathon led Danny down the cobbled path, across the lawn by the fountain, down more steps into another smaller garden with a circular lawn, and through a big archway covered in twining, thorny rose bushes and there, at the very end of the last garden, was a tennis court.
Animal! thought Danny. This place is like being on holidays!
Chapter 10
Danny’s New Room
Uncle Larry had roped Lowry into helping him drag all Danny’s stuff up to his room. Number ten Aylesbridge Close had seven bedrooms, so finding a spare room for Danny wasn’t a problem, but the colours that Aunt Regina had it painted during the week would turn out to be a big problem for Danny.
Jonathon was now giving Danny the tour of the house, as he knew that the longer he kept Danny out of his mother’s way after the driveway incident the more time she would have to cool down and the less chance there was of Heffo being put into boarding kennels.
Regina appeared from one of the many upstairs corridors, with Earl in pursuit.
‘Oh! There you are, boys. Jonathon, darling, show Danny to his room. All his things are there.’
It was lucky that Regina wasn’t present when Danny opened the door to his new bedroom.
Danny just stood at the door and his face and his unusual silence said everything about how he felt about Regina’s choice of colours.
‘What’s up, Danny?’ asked Jonathon. ‘Mum had it painted when she heard you were coming to stay. Do you not like it?’
Jonathon didn’t understand the impression the room with its bright white walls and ceiling, gleaming red window ledges and new red curtains was making on Danny.
‘Cork!’ said Danny.
Now Jonathon thought that the lingering paint fumes were eating Danny’s brain – what did he mean ‘Cork’?
‘I can’t sleep in a room decked out in Cork colours! You have to help me to cover these walls, J. Thank God I brought some posters!’
‘You’re mad!’ laughed Jonathon.
‘I will be if I have to sleep in here. This will be like being all on my own in the middle of Cork supporters with all the red and white around me!’
Danny and Jonathon unrolled the posters and covered the walls. When Jonathon saw the relief and pure contentment on Danny’s face as the last blue poster went over his bed, he thought how wonderful it was to have Danny in his home and how he, too, would like to be as passionate about something as Danny was about his football.
Chapter 11
The Kickabout
Later that day, Danny persuaded Jonathon to have a kickabout, as Larry and Regina had gone into town.
Danny was well impressed with Jonathon. Okay, he hadn’t the foggiest notion about the rules or even how to play the game, but Danny could see that his cousin had natural ability; he probably inherited his dormant talent from Larry.
‘There’s fifteen players on a team,’ explained Danny.
Jonathon nodded his head.
‘Right! Fifteen, like rugby. They play rugby at our school. Father’s always on at me to join the team, but it looks a bit rough to me.’
Danny just stared at Jonathon, and when his cousin was finished babbling on about rugby, Danny let loose.
‘Rugby!’ he screeched. ‘Gaelic football is nothing like rugby. Rugby is played by a bunch of big, hairy wrestlers who just want to chase each other up and down the pitch. No way!’ insisted Danny. ‘No comparison at all. GAA is all about skill and pace. None of that cuddling each other in circles stuff in GAA!’
Jonathon kept his mouth shut for the rest of Danny’s tutorial session.
Danny had sold the whole package of GAA to Jonathon, and the fact that he expressed how good Jonathon could actually be at this magnificent sport just got Jonathon fired up inside.
‘Can I join your team, Danny?’ asked Jonathon. He was nearly shaking with excitement. Danny was gobsmacked.
‘What about your dad?’
The moment of madness had passed for Jonathon – of course he couldn’t join Danny’s team. Larry would rather have his eyes poked out by magpies than let his son play for Littlestown Crokes.
Danny knew that he was partly to blame for raising Jonathon’s hopes and then dashing them again by mentioning the dreaded name.
‘You could join the team without your dad knowing,’ he suggested cheekily.
Jonathon just laughed. But it was a dismissive laugh, not a happy one.
‘Seriously! You could!’ persisted Danny.
‘Father would kill me if he found out, and how would I be able to play without him wondering what I was up to?’
‘Invent something,’ said Danny.
Jonathon just shook his head.
‘Go on, J.’ Danny wasn’t going to give up on this. ‘Look! You want to play for my team. We need a good player, because my dad kicked a player off the team last week, and you’re a savage player. It’s meant to be.’
After a few minutes of total silence, Jonathon just looked up at Danny. Danny had chosen his words of encouragement well.
‘I could tell Father that I’ve joined the debate club at school or maybe the drama club.’
Danny jumped up and kicked the ball high into the sky.
‘That’s it so. You’ll be going to your club on Tuesdays and Thursdays and Saturday afternoons, and we’d better come up with something for Halloween too!’
‘Halloween?’ repeated Jonathon.
Danny told Jonathon all about Halloween and how his dad and Jimmy had organised a trip down to Wexford for the team.
‘My dad has a friend down in Kimuldridge who manages the local under-14s team.’
Jonathon was all ears. The rewards of joining Danny’s team were getting better by the minute.
‘But won’t your dad still be in hospital?’
‘Yeah! But he told Jimmy not to cancel the trip, so it’s still on. We’re going to stay overnight in the local hotel. It’s going to be savage. There’s a youth disco on that night.’
‘Savage!’ said Jonathon. Now he was beginning to talk like Danny.
‘Yeah!’ said Danny. ‘But that’s not the half of it. The next morning we’re playing the under-14s in a friendly.’
‘But they’re older than us, is that fair?’ asked Jonathon. Now Danny’s competitiveness was rubbing off on him!
‘Yeah! But that’s okay. It’s only a friendly and my dad said that because there’s a break of a few weeks before the last game against Barnfield, the experience of it all will pay off.’
Danny stood back up to get his ball.
‘We’ll go into the hospital tomorrow and tell my dad that you’re joining the team,’ said Danny.
‘Won’t he mind?’ asked Jonathon.
‘Don’t worry. He’ll be delighted that you’re joining the team, especially behind your dad’s back.’
The two boys shook hands and then continued their game of football.
It was a hectic day for Danny and he was wrecked going to bed that night. Even though he was surrounded by the red and white colours of the Cork team, his posters did the trick and he slept well in his first night in number ten Aylesbridge Close.
Chapter 12
Can ‘J’ Join the Team?
The next morning, Danny was last to wake and as he pulled his curtains open, the first thing he caught sight of was Uncle Larry and Aunt Regina on the tennis court.
Animal! thought Danny. He would never have thought that Aunt Regina would be into sport, but there she was in her white, frilly Slazenger mini-dress and her sun visor, running poor Larry around the court.
Danny sat on the big bay windowsill for ages watching the very one-sided match and it didn’t take him long to figure out that there was no way that it was Uncle Larry’s idea to fork out for the tennis court.
Larry must have noticed Danny in the window because right in the middle of a game he just threw in the towel, and unfortunately for Danny, that was the end of his entertainment for the morning.
Danny legged it downstairs and out to the kitchen. He desperately wanted to congratulate Aunt Regina in front of Larry as they came in from the garden.
Jonathon and Lowry were already finished their breakfast when Danny rushed into the kitchen.
Larry was first in the back door. He was so drenched with sweat that he looked like he’d just run the marathon, and his face was like a beetroot.
Danny kept quiet, while Larry downed a whole litre of tropical juice.
In waltzed Aunt Regina. Total respect! thought Danny. Not a bother on her. She looks like she could actually run the marathon.
‘Good morning, kids,’ smiled Regina. ‘Sleep well, Daniel?’
‘Like a log!’ answered Danny. ‘Good game out there. You should play for a tennis club,’ suggested Danny.
Aunt Regina was delighted, but Larry let out a big belch. That was what he thought of Danny’s remark.
That evening, after dinner, Aunt Regina dropped Danny and Jonathon into the hospital.
Mick was thrilled to see that Danny and Jonathon were getting on so well.
‘How’s your mam and dad?’ Mick asked Jonathon politely. His speech was quickly improving.
‘They’re fine, Uncle Mick,’ answered Jonathon.
It wasn’t long before GAA took over the conversation as Mick didn’t really know what to say to his nephew, considering he didn’t actually know anything about him.
‘Everything all right at the club, Danny? Is Jimmy managing okay?’ asked Mick anxiously.
Danny wondered if Jimmy had told his dad about the Malachi’s game blunder, so he didn’t really answer his question, but his face must have given him away.
Mick chuckled.
‘Is it really that bad, son? Don’t worry, Jimmy told me about his mistake last week. Just keep an eye on him, Danny. We all know that Jimmy’s not the best with management, but with your help we can still win the league.’
Those words perked Danny up, and he felt it was a good time to discuss Jonathon’s desire to join the team.
‘Eh, Dad? Jonathon’s a really good player, and he wants to join the team.’
If Jonathon wasn’t present at that very moment, Mick Wilde would probably have fallen out of the bed laughing. But one look at his nephew’s face when Danny spoke and he knew how desperately Jonathon awaited a positive response.
‘Really?’ said Mick.
‘Yeah! We’ve being playing out in his back garden and he’s good and he’s dying to join us.’
Mick knew that he had to be very cautious with his nephew’s desire to join the team, but he also knew that eventually, the Larry factor had to be brought into the conversation.
‘And what does your daddy think of all this?’ asked Mick.
Jonathon looked at Danny, and Danny looked at Jonathon.
That was enough for Mick.
‘How are you going to join the team if your dad doesn’t even know that you like football?’
‘His dad won’t let him,’ interrupted Danny.
‘Did you even ask him?’ quizzed Mick.
Jonathon just shook his head, and then mumbled, ‘No point.’
Danny had got it all wrong. He thought that his dad would be up for getting one over on Larry. But what Danny didn’t realise was that when it came to Larry’s kids, Mick Wilde had absolutely no interest in playing games. Family business is serious business, and Danny and Jonathon left the hospital gutted as Mick explained that the only way Jonathon could join the team was with Larry’s consent.
Chapter 13
The Plan
Poor Jonathon was as quiet as a mouse going home on the bus.
Danny tried to start a few conversations, but only got one-word answers from his cousin.
Unlike Jonathon, who was just gutted, Danny was gutted and annoyed. He had really thought that his dad would go along with their plan behind Larry’s back.
‘We can still do it,’ said Danny.
For the first time since they’d boarded the bus, Jonathon turned his head and looked at Danny.
‘How?’
‘Well, you were willing to go behind your dad’s back so I don’t see why I shouldn’t do the same.’
My dad never told me the whole truth about his troubles with Larry, thought Danny, and that was his justification.
Now Jonathon was all ears.
‘Go on.�
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Danny explained the plan to Jonathon. Just like Larry, Mick wasn’t going to know anything. Danny would get Splinter in on the act. Splinter would tell Jimmy that he knew a boy from his swimming club who wanted to join the team and all Jonathon had to do was turn up on Tuesday for training, providing he fooled Larry.
‘But your dad will know everything when he comes back to the club!’ worried Jonathon.
‘I know that,’ said Danny. ‘But if we just concentrate on now and win the league and you’ve helped us, we might be able to get my dad to reconsider.’
Jonathon liked that. It definitely made sense, and even if all failed, at least he would have had a chance to try it out.
By Tuesday, all was going smoothly to plan. Jonathon had put on a great display of drama about the new club at his school and Larry had fallen for it, hook, line and sinker as he thought it would mean his son would have less time to spend with Danny.
Splinter was buzzing with the thoughts of being allowed in on the action, and – being a James Bond fanatic – he felt like he was on a secret mission himself.
Splinter got the ball rolling on his end too and when Jimmy asked his friend’s name. Splinter simply replied, ‘J.’
Danny supplied Jonathon with some training gear and an old pair of football boots that he had collected from home on his lunch break.
It wasn’t just clothes he provided, but also a lesson in how to look and act the part so as not to draw any suspicion.
The two cousins separated before they reached the Little Croker, but before they did, Danny had a few words of advice for his cousin.
‘You wait here for a few minutes, J, and then make your way over to us.’
‘Right, Danny,’ nodded Jonathon.
Jonathon was dead nervous, and he was beginning to question his sanity – he would never have dreamt of doing anything as crazy as this before he hooked up with Danny.
Danny strolled over to the training area. Jimmy had everything set up nicely, and most of the team had turned up for training.
