by T. S. Ryder
Rollon tore her top down the front and moved to kiss one breast. "We can't. There is no future for us. You're human."
"Does it really matter?" Her eyes drifted shut, but even as she spoke she knew it did matter. It mattered for her and for him. Finally, she was able to get her body under control and stopped her rocking. She ran her fingers through his hair. "I want to see Thor's mother."
Rollon tensed. "No."
"Yes."
He pulled back and frowned at her. "You've gotten awfully lippy, there. I shouldn’t tolerate the way you speak to me."
"You like the way I speak to you." She wrapped a strand of hair around her fingers. "There is something between us, Rollon. You can't deny it. You and I . . . There is something here. I know you're scared. I'm a bit scared, too. That's why I want to see her. I want to know the risks."
"The risks." Rollon pulled away. Even though he still knelt over her, their bodies were no longer touching. Tindra whimpered from the loss. Her eyes trailed over his form. All muscle. Just the right amount of hair. She pushed herself onto her elbows and he drew back further. To her surprise, he looked angry. "The risks of becoming a vampire, you mean?"
What were they talking about? Right. Thor's mother. She nodded. "Yes."
"You told me you don't want to be a vampire."
"I've been reconsidering. Maybe being a vampire isn't such an awful thing."
Rollon shook his head, withdrawing further. "It doesn't matter what the risks are because it's not happening. It's illegal on pain of death."
Tindra sighed as she sat up. She pulled the ruined nightshirt off and thrust out her chest. Even though she knew she needed to calm down and not act like this while they were having a conversation of this magnitude, she couldn’t seem to help herself.
"Your laws are too strict. You don't have any allowances for personal choices. Make classes and therapy required, whatever. But shouldn't I be allowed to choose whether I want to be a vampire or not? Who are you protecting when you say no human is allowed to become a vampire regardless of the circumstances?"
Rollon looked torn. He ran a hand through his hair, deliberately not looking at her naked body. Eventually, he sighed. "Maybe you're right. But the risks are still very great and if humans thought it was just a convenient fountain of youth — what are you doing?"
Tindra had moved forward again so she was pressed tight against him. She nuzzled into his neck. His scent was so delightful, he just couldn't get enough of it. Why had she never realized just how delicious he smelled before? It was like she had had a cold her whole life and her sinuses were clear for the first time ever.
"Hey. We're trying to talk."
"We can talk after."
Rollon gripped her hips and pulled her away, firmly putting distance between them. She kept her arms wrapped around his neck, though. His brow furrowed as he studied her. "Are you drunk?"
She didn't remember drinking anything and her head was far too clear for it, anyway. She shook her head. "Completely sober."
"I'm not so sure. You're not acting like yourself."
Tindra moved to kiss his neck again.
"Listen to me! You're not yourself. Did somebody slip you pot brownies?"
"No." Tindra shook her head and rolled her eyes. "I'm not drunk and I'm not high. I just had this really great dream and I really want you. I want you so bad I feel like I might catch on fire if I don't have you. If I don't get to taste you." Her gaze dropped to his neck. Was that a fluttering pulse she saw there? "I want to know what your blood tastes like."
Rollon stiffened. His hands gripped her shoulders and held her in place as he stared at her. Slowly, his nostrils flared. When he moved in closer, Tindra wanted to nip at his neck, but he wouldn't let her close enough to it. She mewled in frustration. Why was he teasing her like this?
He buried his face in her neck and she gasped, only to groan in disappointment when all he did was take one sniff and pull back. He all but leaped out of bed and put a fair distance between them. Tindra jumped in surprise.
"What's wrong?"
Rollon shook his head. "You don't think it's odd that you want to drink my blood?"
"No . . . oh." Her eyes widened as she realized that she wanted to drink his blood. Where had that come from? The desire holding her loosened its grip. "Am I turning into a vampire?"
"No." Rollon's voice was rough. "No, it's not that at all. If I had been paying closer attention, I would have . . . Your scent is unmistakable. You're pregnant."
What? All the air left her lungs, and she was left staring slack-jawed at the king. It was impossible. Pregnant? No. No way. She almost started to giggle, but the look on his face . . . He was serious. Dead serious. She was pregnant. Her hands moved to her stomach. Was it just her imagination or was there a slight bulge there?
Her head spun and she collapsed back on the bed. "But after the miscarriage, they said I couldn't. The doctors. There was something that . . . Oh, my . . . Are you sure? How can you tell?"
"Your scent." Rollon slowly moved to her side again. He wrapped his arms around her. The overwhelming desire from before was completely gone. Her fingers dug into his arms and she shook as everything crashed down on her. "It's okay. Everything is going to be fine. We'll figure this out."
Pregnant. Tindra's eyes filled with tears. Suddenly, all the years she had spent protesting that she didn't want to have children just faded away. Warmth filled her chest, bringing with it a determination she hadn't known she was capable of.
"It's going to be wonderful," she whispered. "My baby. Our baby. Rollon . . . " She rested her head against his. "This baby is going to have more love than they will know what to do with."
Chapter Fourteen – Rollon
Any worries he might have had disappeared the moment he saw Tindra's smile when the doctor confirmed that she was pregnant. Unexpected pregnancies were difficult to deal with, even under the best of circumstances. But Tindra laughed and cried and when Rollon tried to comfort her. She told him that she had never been happier. It had eased his heart substantially.
Rollon walked with her in the gardens afterward, unsure of what to say. With Eva's attack and Ingrid's betrayal, he hadn't had much time to think about much else. Now he was going to be a father again, and he really didn't know what his relationship with the mother was. He didn’t know how to bring it up, either.
"There's my new mommy!" Thor bounded into view. He picked Tindra up and swung her in a circle. "I just got your message, Dad. This is so exciting!"
He beamed as he set Tindra back on her feet and patted her stomach. The human giggled a little nervously as she slipped her hand back into Rollon's. Thor fell in step next to them, a smile beaming over his face. If Rollon didn't know better, he would have said his son looked a tad bit smug. Like he had been hoping this would be the outcome.
"So, should I start calling you Mom now?" Thor continued elbowing Tindra.
"I'm not old enough to be your mother."
"Nobody is, really. But whatever you want." His son shrugged. "Did you know that it was my birthday yesterday?"
"Shit!" Rollon could have kicked himself. "Thor, I'm so sorry. I forgot—"
"I did, too, until just now."
"Happy birthday," Tindra said with an uncertain smile. "What do vampires do to celebrate their birthdays?"
Thor glanced over her head at Rollon. He could see the question in his son's eyes. His first reaction was to say no, but it was his birthday and Tindra had asked as well . . . It was time to face the past. Slowly he nodded, his grip tightening on Tindra's hand.
"Usually we have a few drinks and a present exchange, but this year . . . " Thor looked back at Tindra. "This year, we're going to see Mom. And you are coming with us."
***
The room he had put together for Thor's mother was the most high-tech, comfortable hospital room that money could buy. The doctors quickly updated him as to her situation while he and Thor stepped into the room. Tindra was staying in the waiting ro
om for now. Ariel was once a vibrant woman, but the years of this curse had wasted her away. Her hair was white, and there were deep wrinkles in her face. Her bones were wasted and twig-like.
"I was young, arrogant and selfish when I was with her," Rollon whispered as Thor sat on Ariel's other side. "She could have lived a full life if I hadn't been in it."
"Dad, she loved you. And she loved me, too. There's no point in holding onto guilt for something that isn't your fault."
He stroked the back of her hand. The machines that kept her alive beeped and whirled, but Rollon could still smell death hanging in the air. If he had come more regularly, would his guilt at her state still be eating him up on the inside? He sighed. There were no answers for what might have been. Slowly, he rested his other hand on Ariel's forehead. After all these years . . .
"I didn't love her. I knew how much she loved me and I used that for my own ends. But I didn't love her. That more than anything else . . . How could I treat her like I did?"
Thor sighed. "Dad . . . She knew you didn't love her. And I don't know what would have happened if she had been stronger. But you didn't treat her badly."
"I didn't treat her well."
"You can't change that. But you can change yourself. I'm going to get Tindra."
Rollon wanted to protest but was silent. Moments later, Tindra entered. Thor stayed out. The human gazed at Ariel, a crease in her brow. She moved to Rollon's side and leaned against him. He wrapped an arm around her and kissed the top of her head. Even though the proof of why they shouldn’t be together was right there, he didn't want to let her go.
"I didn't expect her to be old."
"She's aged as the years go by. Slower than humans, but . . . I don't think she's going to last much longer. And I'm not sure she would want to."
Tindra touched Ariel's hand. "I'm sorry that you had to go through this." Rollon thought she was talking to him at first and opened his mouth to reply, but she continued. "Don't worry, though. I'll take good care of him. I won't let him wallow forever. All he needs is a good kick in the pants."
"Talking about kicking the king . . . " Rollon shook his head. "Odd little human."
"Don't odd little human me. I know how these things work. You need someone who will tell it how it is, and I'm telling you: you need a kick in the pants to knock some sense into you." Her smile was short-lived. "How often does it happen like this?"
"Ariel's the only one I know about."
Tindra's brow furrowed. "If she is the only one in thousands, then why are you so worried about it happening again? It was just a tragic fluke."
"I'm worried because . . . because I didn't want to fall in love and have this happen." He stroked her face. "I'm worried for you. Terrified. I feel this fear in my bones. It's a fear I've never felt before, something so deep and strong . . . I'm not sure I could live without you, now that I've grown to know you."
"Is that your way of telling me you love me?"
His hand still gripped Ariel's, and Tindra pressed hers to the other side as if with their grip, they were receiving her blessing on this strange relationship between them. Was it disrespectful to do so in her presence? Or was it the only place where it could be done?
"I don't know what love is." Rollon swallowed the lie back down. "No. That's not true. I know exactly what love is. I love Thor. I love the kingdom. And in an entirely different way . . . I love you."
"A different way?" Tindra teased.
"With fire and lust and a desire to protect you from everything." Rollon glanced at Ariel. "The way I didn't protect her. And maybe that is why I've been holding back. Not because she ended up like this, but because until she was like this I didn't . . . I didn't see her. I didn't appreciate her."
Tindra squeezed his hand. "Thank you for sharing. And thank you," she whispered towards Ariel. "I promise I'll look after him. I love him, too. More than I thought I could love anybody. And I'm sorry that you never got your happy ending."
She wiped her face and stepped away before giving Rollon a soft smile. He wasn't sure what to say. Apparently, he didn't need to. Tindra traced her fingers over his lips for a moment.
"When you're ready, I'll be in my apartment."
She slipped from the room, leaving him alone with Ariel. He stroked the brittle hair from her pale face, remembering how beautiful she looked that first day he saw her. There had been no question in his mind that she might not want him, and he was right. From the moment he opened his mouth, he saw her falling in love with him. He hadn't been cruel to her, but she had given him everything and he had returned only a fraction of himself back to her.
"I'm sorry, my darling," he whispered. "I'm sorry for everything. I wish I could make it up to you. I know that I can't, but I promise from this day forward I'm a changed man. I won't let myself be blinded again." Thor entered the room. He took up a spot beside Rollon and the king gripped his shoulder. "You'd be proud of our son. He's brave, strong, intelligent . . . and he picked up your knack for causing trouble."
"I certainly did." Thor laughed. "You know, Dad would still be wallowing if I hadn't brought Tindra into our lives. I practically had to launch her at him to get him to do anything about it.'
Rollon chuckled. For a moment they stood there in silence, each lost in memories of the past. Eventually, Thor stirred. He kissed his mother's forehead, tears glimmering in his eyes.
"It's time to let go. Mom." His voice shook as he smoothed her hair. "We'll be alright, I promise. And I will never forget you."
"Neither will I." Rollon brushed a kiss against Ariel's forehead. "Goodbye."
For a moment, he thought he saw the old mischievous smirk she would give him. Then, as if she had been waiting for this moment, the beating of her heart stilled. Tears burned his eye as Thor squeezed his mother's hand. He smiled briefly, then collapsed into sobs. Rollon wrapped his arms around his son, rocking him gently like he did when he was a child. Thor clung to him. Tears rolled down Rollon's face.
"She loved you," Rollon whispered. "She loved you more than anything."
"I know."
The doctors rushed into the room, but Rollon merely had them turn off the machinery and leave again. It was time to let go of the past, and wherever Ariel was now, he hoped that she was happy.
Chapter Fifteen – Tindra
A week passed without incident. Hilda was quiet and withdrawn, but that was only to be expected. Despite the upset in the palace, everything else fell into a normal rhythm. Tindra attended birthing classes and she had doctor's appointments regularly. Rollon told her that Ariel had only been pregnant with Thor for seven months, but he had been born fully formed with no problems in the early days of life. He had been conceived during hard times, too, and Tindra was hopeful that the half-vampire baby she was carrying would be strong and hardy.
She sat in Rollon's bed one night after putting Hilda to bed, running her hands over her stomach. It was still as flat as it ever was. How soon would that oval, egg shape start pushing out? How soon before she felt the first flutters of movement? She never got to experience that with her first pregnancy. She had hardly been pregnant at all before she wasn't again.
The pure scent of manly man drifted into her nostrils and she looked up eagerly in anticipation. Her senses had become much more sensitive since she had gotten pregnant, and most times she knew when her lord was approaching before he reached her.
Sure enough, Rollon came into the room moments later. He smiled at her before stripping off his tie and joining her on the bed. Since their visit to Ariel, he had become much more affectionate, actually letting her close to him. He kissed her and then her belly, making her giggle. He stretched out beside her.
"Long day?" she asked.
Rollon nodded. "The defense lawyer for Ingrid's trial was asking a lot of questions. Pestering to get at Hilda. How's she holding up?"
"I don't know. She's buried herself in her hobbies and studies. She's not refusing to eat or anything. I think you need to hire her a the
rapist. This is a lot of trauma for a little girl to go through."
Rollon nodded. "I've already started looking into therapists. I should never have kept the truth about what Eva did from her."
"You wanted to protect her."
"And we only hurt her more." Rollon sighed as he rubbed Tindra's stomach. "Is that Ingrid's phone on the nightstand?"
Tindra glanced over. "Yeah. Hilda was playing games on it instead of going to sleep, so I took it away. I'm still not sure what sort of mom I'm going to end up being."
"You'll be fine. The fear is normal." Rollon smiled encouragingly. "I've done it once before but the thought of raising another child is terrifying. I got lucky with Thor, but what if this new baby and I don't get along? What if I have nothing in common with them?"
"I'm sure you'll do fine. As long as we love this baby and let them be who they are, then we'll be fine. We'll be fine," she repeated.
She undid the tie in Rollon's hair, allowing it to fall like a curtain over his face. He pressed another kiss to her stomach, then moved up to her chest, kissing between her breasts before settling at her neck, sucking at her skin in a way that sent tingles running down her spine. It didn't take much these days to excite her, and the familiar tightening of her core started even before Rollon's hands got in on the action.
"I want to taste you," she blurted. Ever since that night when she learned she was pregnant, she kept thinking of blood and feeling a mix of desire and disgust. She knew it wasn't normal and she shouldn’t want it, but she couldn’t help herself. "I want to taste your blood."
"Ariel craved blood when she was pregnant, too." Rollon tore off his shirt and threw it to the floor. "She even grew these tiny little fangs that came and went. Let's see." He pushed her lip up and made a humming noise. "Sometimes they didn't grow until we had sex."
Instantly heat pooled in every part of her. "What are we waiting for, then?"
Rollon grasped her thighs and pushed them apart. He kissed between her breasts again, this time moving down while he pushed her nightgown up to her waist. There was a sharp tug and a tearing noise, and he threw away the lacy panties she had chosen to wear that night. God, if that didn't turn her on even more. With a sassy grin up at her, he dipped his head between her legs and kissed her thigh.
