by Meg Maguire
“No, Kate. I’ve never been happier in my entire life.”
“Oh, good.”
“But if you ever put me through anything like that again, I will murder you,” he amended.
“Understood. I guess I like, literally don’t have a leg to stand on now, trying to convince you this job isn’t dangerous to my health.”
Ty shook his head, not looking as if he wanted to pursue this conversation. Kate decided she didn’t, either. She’d come out here and lost her job, but she’d found a lover, for as long as that might last. Right now she felt ready to surrender for a change, to take things as they came. She didn’t want to hang on for dear life anymore, so scared of losing her grip that she couldn’t enjoy anything. She wanted to let go, to float, the way she’d floated as Ty had carried her barely conscious body through the wilderness.
Then she thought of something else he might well wring her neck over. Her mouth opened and closed with uncertainty as she debated whether or not to ask about it.
Ty smirked grimly at her expression and read her mind. “Don’t you even dare ask me about the bloody camera, you freak.”
SEVERAL HOURS LATER KATE was up and moving with the medic’s permission, ankle puffy and sore but seeming otherwise in good working order. While Kate had been recuperating, two members of the crew had followed Ty’s tracks into the woods and recovered their abandoned equipment. Ty strapped the last of their stuff to the back of the snowmobile and scanned the sky—still overcast but white now, not gray. He ignored a rumble from his stomach, too close to the finish line to give in and accept food from the rescue crew. Anyhow, he’d break the fast properly, with a steak and a beer, not a bag of crisps and a can of cola.
Soon enough they were back on the trail, Ty driving and Kate huddled behind him, the rescue crew trailing a few yards back. They zipped effortlessly over the snowy trails he and Kate had been trudging along just hours before, making the ordeal seem like a ridiculous dream.
The drone of the motor lulled his brain and he felt at peace with the world. Accepting and calm. He couldn’t quite understand it. Ty’s worst fear had just come to pass—Kate had gotten hurt on his account. Times three. Sled accident, creosote fire, trap… That last one was the worst. It had been nearly twenty-five years since he’d stood by as another person he loved made an impulsive decision, did what Ty knew in his gut was wrong and made him watch as she paid for it. And he’d let Kate go. He hadn’t listened to his gut, but goddamn, he’d known what to do—and it was the right thing. He’d messed up again, he’d backed down. But this time, when the consequences came, Ty hadn’t frozen. He’d come through for Kate, and there was no chance he’d ever ignore his intuition again.
He knew now what had to be done about the show, and Kate’s job. He knew how to take his best stab at fixing everything, and there was no chance he’d relent until he got his way. No flip of the coin, no darts. He’d go after it the patented Kate Somersby rabid-junkyard-dog way, the network be damned.
After an hour or so the trail opened onto a stretch of snow-covered prairie, and Ty spotted their salvation. Kate saw it, too—she squeezed his middle as Grenier’s Sled Supply appeared on the horizon.
Jim Grenier must have been tipped off by the motors, because he was already walking down to meet them as they pulled off the trail.
“So, we didn’t lose you, after all,” he said, smiling at the pair of them as they dismounted and found their land legs.
“Nope,” Ty said. “All your dogs made it back okay then?”
“They always do. I’m sure that camera you mounted on the sled’s got a story to tell.”
Kate went inside with Grenier to collect the items the dogs had brought back while Ty loaded the rental truck.
“It’s going to feel weird to be back in a motel tonight,” Kate said, slamming the tailgate closed a few minutes later.
Ty nodded. He looked off into the distance, smirking, wondering exactly what that final near-death experience had done to the walls Kate had erected between them.
“What’s on your menu?” she asked, grinning.
He turned to face her, keeping his words more tender than flirtatious. “I’ve got a few things in mind.” They climbed into either side of the cab.
“I can’t wait to see what you order. It’ll be my treat,” Kate said. “Thanks for saving me,” she added suddenly, voice soft. Ty wondered if she felt it, too—this harsh pang in the chest, half regret, half relief.
“You’re the one who saved me,” he said quietly, eyes fixed in the distance. He heard Kate’s nearly inaudible “whoa” as he did something he hadn’t done in forever. He buckled his seat belt.
12
DINNER WAS A QUIET AFFAIR. After leaving the truck at the motor court the pair had walked to the bar, where Ty ate two steaks and two baked potatoes and Kate made calls to secure them a flight back to Los Angeles the next afternoon. They’d thoroughly missed their original booking.
Kate flipped her phone closed and Ty lifted his glass of beer to propose a toast.
“What’s this to?” she asked, raising her own drink.
“To evolution,” he said after thinking about it a moment. To me finally finding my balls after a lifetime of faking it.
Kate shrugged her agreement and they clinked their glasses. “Evolution.”
“Do you remember much of what I said to you while I was carrying you to the safety crew?” Ty asked.
“No, not a word.”
He shrugged. “No matter.”
“Did I miss something good?”
“Nah. Just the ramblings of a very tired man.” He was grateful she wouldn’t remember all the promises he’d made when he’d been desperately bargaining for her to come out of the accident unharmed. There was one in particular that he wasn’t prepared to make good on…letting her back on the location filming. Not only was that still out of the question, Ty had made a decision about the entire show, one that could only look ugly at the outset. But he’d decided. This was the way to go, and he wouldn’t be dissuaded. He just needed time to get the network on board, and he needed Kate out of the picture if negotiations were to go the way he hoped. She’d never agree to the idea if he explained it up front, but if the pieces came together as he hoped, Ty thought he stood a fair chance of winning her over.
“I owe you Lakers tickets,” she said, bringing him back to the present. “You found the safety crew first.” Her tone was warm, her smile a bit wicked—both indicators of Ty’s good chances once they got back to the motel.
“I look forward to collecting on that.” He grinned guiltily to himself. Time would tell if she’d forgive him enough to make good on the promise before the NBA season wrapped.
They drained their glasses and walked along the dark street to the motel, and Ty’s priorities shifted as if a switch had flipped from business to pleasure. He didn’t bother going to his own room. As soon as Kate shut the door behind them he pulled her into his arms.
He felt her hugging back, not to the bone-crushing degree he was, but strong again. “You gave me such a scare this morning, Katie.”
Her voice was stilted from the hug. “Now you know how I feel, each and every day.”
“Goddamn…I don’t know how you do it,” he said, reliving for a moment just how terrified he’d been.
Kate slid out of the embrace and looked him in the eyes. “It’s just how you are, Ty. I can’t stop you from needing to do those things. Plus you make it look fun, all that death-defiance.”
“Well, not anymore. I’m crossing over to the lame side from now on—seat belts, harnesses, walk signs, all that boring old sensible crap.”
She smiled. “I’ll believe that when I see it…but good. I hope you do.” She glanced around the room, probably feeling how Ty did, as though they’d just boarded an alien spacecraft. “You want to take a shower?” she asked, lips twitching, and exhausted or not, Ty’s body responded in the unmistakable affirmative.
He followed her into the bathroom.
While she brushed her teeth he warmed the water up to her preferred, scalding temperature.
Kate spit and asked, “Does all this feel really weird to you? You know…us? Like this. Finally lovers?”
He shook his head. “I’ve been imagining us this way for almost three years now. Everything seems just about right, finally.”
With another smirk she began to undress him, her small fingers taking their time with his shirt snaps. Even with sleep-deprived circles beneath her eyes and an assortment of fresh scrapes and bruises, Ty didn’t think she’d ever looked this beautiful. She finished undressing him and he returned the favor, savoring every inch of skin he exposed.
The hot water pummeled them as they entered the shower, steam and soap and shampoo reminding Ty that he was still a human being. He felt everything that ever stood between them being washed away, rinsed down the drain. Perhaps it was the exhaustion’s doing, but he felt more raw and vulnerable than he ever had before in his life, here, naked under the bright bathroom lights, this close to Kate. It felt pretty bloody good.
Kate rinsed her hair with an indulgent sigh. With the requisites of hygiene met, she put her hands on Ty’s sides, breaking into a smile he didn’t recognize, one that averted her eyes and made the steam-flushed apples of her cheeks blush even deeper.
“Why are you smiling?”
“I’m finally going to get to have sex with you in a tacky motel room,” she said, grin deepening. “My number one fantasy,” she added in a scandalous whisper, holding up her index finger. She grabbed the soap from the tub’s shelf and lathered her hands and slid them down his body, palms making a slippery assessment. Her fingers wrapped around him and Ty felt himself surrender, not only to the pleasure but to her, in every sense of the word. He closed his eyes, lost in the sensations, letting the moans rise out of his lungs, giving in completely. Her slick hands touched and fondled and teased until his arousal demanded more.
His eyes opened to find her still smiling up at him. “Take me to your bed, Miss Somersby.”
THEY ABANDONED THE SHOWER and Kate toweled off, Ty lingering to shave. As she left the steamy bathroom, she noted with a frown that, predictably, all the sheets and covers had been replaced and the bed remade in their absence. She untucked everything at once. This had to be just like her fantasy, and that meant rumpled bedclothes. Ty climbed in beside her a few minutes later, smelling like lust and shaving cream, his naked body still slightly damp.
“What do you need, Katie?” he asked. Not waiting for an answer, his fingers were on her within seconds, stroking gently between her legs, making her want to open herself to him—not just her sex, but everything. All of her. The armor that Ty had accused her of hiding inside—it was sitting in the snow next to that trap now, rusting.
“I need to be with you,” she whispered, meaning so much more than just this encounter. The sexual desire she’d been bubbling with a few minutes earlier had been eclipsed by something more elemental.
“I want that, too,” he mumbled.
His touch made her dizzy, draining away any last vestiges of her old determination to keep her body and her spirit separate. She pulled away, sitting up and looking him over again. She couldn’t get enough of this man. Her fingers trembled as she brushed them across his thighs. She felt a little frightened by the intensity of her emotions, but it was a fear she wanted to explore. When he tried to rise and do the same to her she pushed him back down with a firm hand.
“Let me enjoy you.”
Ty allowed her hands to roam as they pleased, her palms, fingertips and nails surveying his bare body as he watched. She took in this man lying beneath her, more beautiful and strong and powerful than any she’d ever dreamed she’d be able to call her own, even for just one evening. She inventoried every inch of skin she’d lain awake fantasizing about, every inch she’d tended to when he’d been hurt.
In the end it was his mouth she wanted most. She lay down alongside him, their chests pressing as they melted into one another. Kate’s fingers tangled in Ty’s hair as she held his face to hers, tasting him, kissing him, her tongue discovering all the nuances of his mouth. Her fingertips memorized his face. He seemed to sense her wish, holding back his own explorations so that this caress could be hers to give.
She drew her lips away from his, gazing down at him.
“Tell me what you want.”
“I want to…I want to see you. I want to have you, without you trying to prove something. I want the Ty who crawls into my bed at 3:00 am.”
He shifted a little, seeming uncomfortable but game. “Okay.”
“I want the Ty who no one else gets to see. Show me that.” She smiled. “Even if it means the sex is lousy. Just show me what you wanted all those nights.”
He nodded. “All right.”
“Bearing in mind we don’t have any condoms.”
Ty’s lips twitched but he didn’t reply. He guided her to sitting and his hands surveyed her in return, tender, as though this were the first time they’d been undressed together. His touch was far different than the commanding variety he’d shown her in the woods. He seemed unsure of himself, his palms cupping her breasts cautiously, as if he feared he might hurt her, his mouth half-open with awe. He leaned in to suckle her, his lips gentle but needy. He moved to sit cross-legged and coaxed her into his lap, wrapping her legs around his waist, mindful of her sore ankle. His cock was hard and heavy, resting against her belly. Ty seemed unaware of it. His eyes were trained on her face as he kissed her, his mouth taking hers in quick, anxious tastes. Hands returning to her breasts, his fingers strummed her nipples, gently pinching, and she felt desire burning there as surely as she’d ever felt it between her legs.
She uttered his name against his mouth, like a sigh of sweet surrender. “What were you looking for, all those nights when you came to my bed?”
His palms left her breasts to stroke her neck, cup her jaw. “I didn’t want to be alone with myself.”
“Why does that scare you?”
He smiled, looking down. “You’ve seen me at my worst. Would you want to be trapped alone with that?”
“I like you at your worst.”
“Maybe that’s why I kept crawling into your bed, then. Because you can handle me. Maybe I want to be handled.”
“Maybe. I like that side of you,” she said. “The one you don’t show the cameras. I want the you that’s human, the one nobody else gets…. Show me what that man wants.”
“I’ll try.”
Kate rocked her hips back and Ty reached down to guide himself inside her, pulling her close again. He sealed their bodies together and she felt him, like a part of herself, pulsing in her core. He closed his eyes for a long moment, not moving, brow knitting.
“Oh God, Kate.”
“What?” She stroked his face, wanting to understand what was going on inside that private mind.
He wrapped his arms tight around her, pulling her even closer, burying his mouth and nose in the hollow of her collarbone. A long exhalation steamed against her skin.
“This is it,” he said finally, the words muffled.
“This is what?”
“This is what I wanted all those nights.”
“And what is ‘this’?”
“Just…this. Being inside you. Having you all around me. All your smells, and the way you feel. Your hands on me. I wanted you like this, letting me in, without it being about what I could give.”
“Without any agendas?”
“Without any…anything. The only times I can ever just be are when you let me lie next to you. When it’s just me, being a wreck, and you allowing me to be that way.” He pushed his face harder against her, arms tightening. He held her in that position for a long time.
“You know what the hardest part of my job is?” Kate asked, not pausing for a reply. “It’s the editing. It’s watching as they take all the unscripted bits of you, between the segments, and get rid of them. Stripping it all away so only the version of you that yo
u want the world to see is left. I wish everyone could see who you really are. You’re so wonderful.” The words surprised her even as they came out of her mouth. It was possibly the nicest and most sincere thing she’d ever said to him. To anyone.
“I don’t want everyone to see that,” he mumbled. “I only want you to.”
They were quiet for a few minutes, and Kate let her body dissolve into their greater whole. Almost without meaning to she began, slowly at first, to rock with him, the motion intensifying until their hips were writhing, until she could feel the friction, feel him moving in and out of her.
Ty moaned, long and low, close to her ear, and the raw sound raised all the tiny hairs along her back. He transformed before her, the sensuality melting into raw sexuality, melting her. How had she ever lived without this?
They rocked together, feeding each other’s excitement, in no rush for this exploration to reach a conclusion. Ty maneuvered her onto her back, taking control of their motions, thrilling her with that sensation of tender dominance as his large, powerful body commanded her and served her simultaneously.
“I want to taste you, Katie,” he murmured.
“You can have anything you want.”
After a dozen more beats he withdrew to stand before the bed. He pulled her by the calves to the edge of the mattress and knelt in front of her as she’d done for him in the little cabin. Kate glanced at the wall behind him, at the full-length mirror next to the bureau that revealed the entire scene to her—the long, elegant back muscles of the beautiful man before her. He coaxed her thighs open, eyes fixed on her center. He brought his face in close and she heard his deep inhalation.
“Sweet Christ, you smell amazing.”
Kate responded with a firm hand on the back of his head, drawing him closer still. It had been a long time since she’d been treated to this particular intimacy, and even longer since she’d had a thoroughly impressive experience. Now she was itchy with impatience, sensing in every fiber of her being that this man would know exactly what her body wanted, instinctively.
