by Jordan Bates
“I didn’t know he was going to give you the book.” I couldn’t even look at Greg, because what had just happened was definitely not something my boss should have a part of.
“Is it okay if I head out now?”
“Yeah, no problem.” Greg started to stand, but I shooed him to sit back down, still not able to meet his eyes. I placed the book back into my bag, feeling ashamed that my heart was fluttering so much. I left the room without either of us saying a word.
I mentally kicked myself as I took the elevator down. Just because Adam and I weren’t talking right now, it didn’t give me any right to have these feelings for anyone, especially not my boss. Yeah, sure, Adam and I had had our rough patches before, but they always ended in us working it out and making our relationship that much stronger.
When I left the building, I got the same feeling I had last week when I left alone. I looked around, making sure I was good, and then headed towards the road. My mind wandered back to the texts Adam had sent. He was so angry. He had cursed at me and called me a cunt, his least favorite word. I flinched just thinking about it. It wasn’t until I almost stepped into the road and a hand grabbed my waist and pulled me back that I heard the sound of a car horn blaring. The vehicle in question shot past me, horn still sounding.
Close one.
I closed my eyes.
I wasn’t alone.
I turned around to see who my savior was and came face to face with Max.
“You trying to get yourself killed?” He had one arm wrapped around my waist and the other hand on my cheek. I almost leaned into him but stopped myself. I stood frozen as he wrapped himself around me. His jaw was tight and lips in a thin line, but when his eyes searched mine, they were filled with concern. I didn’t understand how a man who was so hard on the outside, could be so caring on the inside.
“No, but thank you.” I tried to laugh it off and Max let me go, but his touch lingered on my body.
“Why are you getting out so late? Greg asking for more help on his projects?” And there it was, back to work talk, a safe place for us. Greg must be a known procrastinator. “I can ask him to let up on the extra work.”
“It’s fine. I wouldn’t mind the extra work.” I didn’t want to tell him that he had planted the seed of moving departments, that that was where my mind was heading. I didn’t want him to know that he had that much influence over me. “I should be getting home now.”
“I can drive you.” Max pointed down to a pickup truck. It was completely different than the town car I had seen him in last week.
“That’s okay. I live across the street.” I smiled wearily at him.
“At least let me walk you. You don’t need to be getting injured this early into the job.” He took another step backwards, his laughter finally filling the space between us. I felt a strange tug in my chest. I didn’t like it. It was the kind of feeling I got when I read my books, when you started to like the one person you shouldn’t. The types of feelings that led to something more. I didn’t know what it was about Max, but something drew me to him—not physically but mentally. He was smart, and that drew me to him, even though he was an arrogant ass. I wanted to get to know more about him, but on a professional level, and maybe even one day, a friend level.
“I’m fine, Max. I’ll be safe. I promise.” I turned around, but this time before I crossed the street I looked both ways and made my way towards Lilly’s apartment. Before I headed into my building, I turned around to where I had been standing with Max. I caught his stare just as I had on Friday night when he left me. My heart leapt a little, and I pushed the feelings down deep inside of me to lock away. I made my way up to the apartment without another thought. I couldn’t have any more of those thoughts. The lights were off except for the one in Lilly’s bedroom. I made my way quietly across the apartment and to my bed.
I lay there for what seemed like hours, thinking about my conversation with Max earlier today and then the one at the curb just before coming home. I picked up my phone again and dialed Adam. It was only eight, but I needed peace of mind from my husband. On the second ring, the line finally picked up.
“Hello?” Adam’s voice sounded groggy.
“Adam.” My heart sank. He hadn’t even known who it was when he answered.
“Alexa.” His voice sounded tense now.
“Did I wake you?”
“Nope.” I heard the loud pop of his P. “Just a little tired from not sleeping at all.”
Worry filled me. I hadn’t meant to keep him awake. I knew he worked nights, and I hadn’t even taken into consideration that he wouldn’t be able to sleep.
“I’m sorry. I should have answered the phone.” I whispered the words, scared that if I didn’t sound sorry enough Adam wouldn’t believe me. I brought my hand to my mouth, biting on one of my nails. It was a habit I hadn’t entertained for a long time, but I didn’t know what else to do.
“You should have.” His words were hard and tears were starting to form. He had completely disregarded my apology. “I didn’t know what to think. I thought you were dead at one point.”
“I’m so sorry.” My words broke out of me as a sob.
“Don’t. I need to know you won’t ever do something like that again. That you won’t leave me like that.” The words were like a knife to the heart. I had hurt the man I loved, but then I thought to how hurt I was.
“I promise.” This was the second time I said this tonight, and this time I didn’t know how true it was. Would I break this promise to Adam? I didn’t know where these thoughts were coming from, but I knew during this conversation that something had completely changed. That my marriage was changing and I didn’t know how to stop it.
“I’m going to get ready for work.”
“Okay.” I felt as low as I could feel right now.
“I love you, Alexa.”
I sighed at that. “I love you, too.” I caught my breath. “Adam.” I hung up. I had said Adam. I had. I knew I had. But before saying his name, I had to stop, because I had almost said something different. I had almost said Max. It wasn’t necessarily that I loved Max, but it seemed like he was consuming my every thought. I didn’t know what to think, so I turned into the pillow and cried myself to sleep, knowing that sleep could cure almost anything.
Chapter 5
The next week seemed to go by in a flash. Greg had me help him out on a few more projects. Lilly, Erica, and I seemed to become closer as we agreed on girl night almost every night. Adam kept me on a short leash, calling and texting every day. I wasn’t complaining, though, because just as I had said before, after every time we had a rough patch we would always come out stronger, and we were getting there.
Adam and I had finally chosen a home for us, but it wouldn’t be ready for move-in until next week. We would be staying at a hotel until we could move. I was excited because he was supposed to be coming in this afternoon, just in time for our office party, or well, Max’s birthday party. I had just found out about it yesterday after work. Lilly had insisted I wear a dress she had already picked out for me.
It was Saturday morning and I knew Adam would be on his plane coming here, so I was surprised when my phone started to vibrate and I saw his name flash onto the screen. A photo popped up of us together a year ago in New York. I smiled at the memory of us running through the snow. I couldn’t get enough of it, or enough of him.
“Adam?”
“Hey, babe.” I could hear noise in the background. I got excited thinking he was already here. “I have some bad news.”
I didn’t say anything to his comment because I knew the look on my face and the ones on Lilly’s and Erica’s were just how I felt. We were sitting outside a Starbucks, trying to get our caffeine fix for the weekend.
“They want me to stay in California for a few more days, until the house is ready to move in to.” I knew what that meant. It meant he wouldn’t be in my arms. I wouldn’t get to hold my husband for another week.
“Okay.”
I could hear the disdain in my voice.
“Babe. Don’t be like that. You know I want to be there with you.”
“I know. It’s just hard.” I felt defeated, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to do anything. It was his job. It was demanding and we both knew it. “Just make sure you get here soon. I haven’t even seen the house yet and I don’t want to move everything in by myself.”
“Don’t worry.”
A thought popped into my head, the listing he had sent me of our new house. “Babe.”
“Yeah?” He sounded distracted now.
“I know you sent an email about the house, but I didn’t see a price range for it.”
“Don’t worry about it.” It was like he was waving me off with his words.
“But if I need to work more—”
He cut me off immediately. “I said, don’t worry about it.” This time the words were so easy going. I could tell I was making him agitated, and with what had happened last week, I didn’t want to push my luck.
“Just know that I’ll be there to move everything in. Everything won’t come until after I’m there.”
I took his word for it and we hung up with a quick goodbye. I looked up to the girls who were sitting in front of me.
“He isn’t coming home today.” I didn’t have to tell them. They knew, but it felt good to say it out loud.
“Let’s take these drinks back to the apartment and start getting ready for tonight.” I looked at my watch and then back at Lilly, her words not making sense. “The party isn’t for hours, but I have some of the best products. We can have a full pampering day!”
I knew this to be true because her skin was flawless and she always had her nails done. I wasn’t always big on getting dressed up, but this was the first big party that I was going to since my wedding, so a good pampering sounded like just what I needed.
It was almost six before we finished our nails and makeup. The girls wouldn’t let me look in any mirrors. They said it was a surprise, and I knew I would be surprised. Erica was doing my makeup and by the way she came into work every day, I was shocked it wasn’t what she did professionally. Her contour was always on point.
I looked around the room. Dresses were laid out everywhere, but Lilly said she had already picked mine out. I was about to ask her which one was mine when Erica put a blindfold over my eyes and both girls started to put me in my dress. I had been traipsing around in only black lingerie for the last hour, so I was excited to feel the smooth silk slide against my skin. The blindfold fell from my eyes and I was looking at both Lilly and Erica who had on their own dresses already.
“What?” I questioned. Both girls couldn’t stop smiling.
“Just turn around.” Lilly’s eyes shone with excitement as she turned me around herself.
I was not expecting what I saw in the mirror. The dress was a beautiful dark green smooth silk and stopped just above my knee. It wasn’t too tight, but it still hugged my curves. It was strapless with a sweetheart neckline that looked stunning against my pale skin. I never would have thought I’d look this good in green.
“You look gorgeous.” Erica’s smile didn’t fade as she looked over her and Lilly’s work.
“Gorgeous? Try sexy as hell!” Lilly pushed me away from the mirror, handing me a clutch that matched the dress. “I just wish Adam were here to see you tonight.”
I couldn’t help but blush, because in all honesty, I had never felt this sexy before, not even on my wedding day. I looked back at my reflection a little longer. My legs looked long with my heels on, even though I was only five two, and my hair looked great, elongating my neck, around which a simple chain necklace with three leaves on it was draped.
“Maybe he can be. Here.” I took my phone from the clutch Lilly had given me and handed Erica my phone. “Take a picture and I can send it to him.
She took a few at different angles and I sent him them all in hopes of a quick response, but when it didn’t come, I put my phone away. Adam and I had been keeping up constant communication lately, but tonight I wanted to not think about how he still wasn’t here with me.
We headed out of the apartment and headed out to the sidewalk. Lilly had on a knee-length dress that was purple with tulle underneath and a lavender cardigan over the top. Erica had a navy-blue dress that went to the floor; it was an A-line style dress and fit her so well that it made her look like a movie star.
Max’s place was only a block down from the office, so we walked. I hadn’t known that he was so close. The other night when I had seen him, he was getting in a truck to leave but offered me a ride home. If he was so close to work, why wouldn’t he just walk? Those thoughts escaped my mind when we walked into his condo building, though. It was magnificent. A door man let us in and directed us to the first gallery door, where the party was being held. The music was already loud, and the smell of fresh seafood filled the room.
We were only a few minutes late, but everyone else had gotten here early. They were all dressed to impress, and everyone had at least one glass of alcohol in their hands. Max definitely knew how to throw a party. Greg came up to us immediately.
“Hello, ladies. I’m happy to see that you made it.” He was carrying a tray of wines and handed us each one.
“Good to see you, too, Greg.” It was Lilly who piped up. I was shocked she had even said anything to him. He didn’t stay long, bowing away from us.
“Don’t scare the poor man!”
I laughed at Erica’s comment because it was true. It seemed that even though they tried to act like nothing was happening, you could totally tell there was tension between Lilly and Greg, but we all just let them keep ignoring it.
We made our way over to where the food was. If there was going to be alcohol, there needed to be carbs in my stomach. We looked before deciding to grab plates to fill all the way up. I turned around at the end of the table but was confused by the look on Lilly’s and Erica’s faces, their wide-eyed gaze reaching over my shoulder. I turned around to see Max standing behind me, and understood immediately why they were staring so intently.
He looked fantastic in his black and white tuxedo, his dark green tie the only hint of color. It matched my dress, but I had to remind myself that it was only a coincidence. All four of us stood there in a silence that I didn’t want to break.
“You look stunning, Alexa.” Max took a step closer, placing a hand on my arm. I didn’t move it right away, though; a warm sensation went up my arm to my neck. It was suddenly a sauna in the gallery room.
“Thank you, Max.” I finally took a step back. “Happy birthday.”
“Thank you, and thank you, ladies, for coming tonight.” He was bringing Lilly and Erica into the conversation now, but he didn’t look away from me. He had taken a step back from me, putting his hands back into his pockets. It almost made him look smaller, but I knew deep down inside that it was so he wouldn’t touch me again. I didn’t even think he meant to a second ago. The girls moved to stand beside me, both wrapping one arm around my waist on each side. “I have to make my rounds now. I hope to see you all later.”
Max was already walking away before I got the nerve to stop him. I left the girls where they were, both with shocked expressions as I walked after Max. This was definitely a first for us, me the one chasing after him. “Max, wait.” I grabbed for his wrist and he stopped dead in his tracks, staring down at where we connected. I ripped my hand away.
“I have something for you.” His eyebrows scrunched together like they had the first day I met him, not in confusion but in question. His eyes got wide. I could see his face as the thought formed, and a smirk slowly inched along his face. I realized then that the way I was acting was probably sending the wrong signal. I pulled a folded piece of paper out of my clutch. I had sneaked it in here when Lilly and Erica weren’t looking earlier. “Here.”
I handed Max my application for The Ink Well, but this time it was for the publishing and editing department. I had woken up yesterday in the mi
ddle of the night and wandered around the apartment I had been sharing with Lilly. I couldn’t help but think that if I was here and Max was offering, why shouldn’t I take the job that I knew I already loved? I hadn’t talked to Adam about it, but after him not coming home today, I needed to take this step. If I did this before he came to Atlanta, then there would be no going back. So I ended up filling out the application on my phone and printed it out before we left for the night. Max looked over it for a few minutes, and the silence between us grew awkward. The smirk had left, but a soft smile remained, and I had one to match it.
“Thank you,” was all he said as he looked down at me, but the smile I had went away slowly.
“What’s wrong?” Max moved closer to me. “There was a smile there, but then it disappeared.”
He moved his hand to reach for me, but I pulled away. He flinched and dropped his balled fist to his side.
I took a deep breath. “Adam was supposed to come home today but didn’t. I didn’t tell him about the application.”
Max held the sheet of paper up between us.
“Do you want this, Alexa?” His question caught me off guard.
“Of course I do.”
“Then we will get it situated. Whatever it is that you want, I’ll make sure that you get it.” He turned his back to me and only moved a few steps before turning back. “And as far as I’m concerned, no man should ever leave his wife alone for this long. Not even for work.”
I didn’t know how to respond, because I saw the pained look on Max’s face, and I didn’t know why it was there. He left me alone in the middle of the dance floor, but it wasn’t long until a purple drink was shoved into my hands. Lilly and Erica danced around me, oblivious as to what happened between Max and me. I pushed both him and Adam to the back of my mind and partied the rest of the night. By the fifth drink, I had no care in the world and the girls made the executive decision to finally head home for the night.
