Learning to Move Forward: Novella #3.5

by Cynthia P. O'Neill

  His breathing began to quicken and I could feel his balls draw up against me. “I want your eyes on me, Grace. I want to see my beautiful bride-to-be come on command, now!”

  I opened my mouth to scream as the orgasm rolled over me with such intensity, that lights shot off behind my eyes. No sound came out. He was the same as me, no words, no grunts, just extreme passion passing between two souls who’d experienced a bonding that defied words; a cathartic release of sorts.

  His hands caressed my face as his tongue dove deep into my mouth, exploring every inch of me. My legs locked around his hips as he ground out his own release into me. We didn’t move for what seemed like an eternity.

  “Are you okay, my love?” He hovered over me with apprehension on his face. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

  I took a deep breath in, a smile spreading across my face. “Permission to touch you, sir?”

  He smiled, biting my lower lip playfully. “Permission granted, subbie.”

  I wrapped my arms around his neck and drew him closer, where I could show him my gratitude by swiping my tongue into his mouth. He took control of the kiss and we were lost to each other yet again as his rod stiffened and began moving inside of me for round two.

  A half hour later, we finally emerged from the office, no one the wiser. We took our food order and headed over to Garrett and Laurel’s house.

  In the car he admitted, “I like the idea you have with the restaurant. Are you sure you don’t want to just work there for me? We can run it together and have plenty of conferences in my office.” His wiggled his eyebrows seductively.

  “You know I enjoy working in the medical industry. I love the pharmaceutical sales, but I wouldn’t be opposed to doing other business work within the medical arena.”

  He tipped his head to the side, pondering a thought. “I bet Garrett could—”

  I didn’t even let him get the thought out before I opposed it. “No favors. I only want a job that I’ve earned, nothing more.”

  His hand came over and clamped onto my knee, giving it a squeeze. “Are you getting mouthy with me, subbie?”

  “We aren’t playing right now, sir. I thought I was to be open and honest with you always.”

  “That’s what I love about you, Grace. You blew me away with your honesty and no holds barred approach right from the beginning. When you went after my brother in the hospital, when Laurel was attacked, that’s when I knew you were meant for me.”

  “What?” I looked over at him and snickered. “You’ve actually wanted to belt your brother a time or two?”

  “Sure. Who wouldn’t? Sometimes he can be a pompous ass. Why do you think I ended up in therapy for a while?”

  “So that’s how you know Jocelyn so well?”

  He nodded. “Yes. I’d been the only brother, the oldest son, until Garrett was adopted. Then he became the center of attention and I became the middle child.”

  I stared at him in amazement. He was jealous. He didn’t seem the type. “But you were only five.”

  “It didn’t matter. I still felt like I’d been abandoned. So I acted out for a couple of years until I was placed in therapy.” He paused a moment, laughing to himself. “I was a fool really. I didn’t understand why Garrett required so much attention. My parents and Jocelyn, who’d just graduated from college and started working with a group of psychologists, before starting her own practice several years later, kept trying to tell me why he needed help, but the biggest break came when I heard him crying one night.”

  “So what did you do?” I wondered.

  “Our bedrooms were connected by a shared bathroom. I heard him inside crying and managed to get the door open. He tried to shy away from me, but I scrunched down on the floor next to him.

  “He asked me not to hate him. I told him I could never hate him, but I was jealous that he’d stolen some of our parents’ attention. He apologized about that and told me how he missed his parents and aunt.” His hand clutched the wheel tightly, causing his fingers to turn a bit white.

  I placed my hand on his leg and gave it a squeeze and noted that his demeanor softened a bit. He had one tear in his eye. “I couldn’t understand how he managed to keep himself together with all that he’d gone through. My heart broke for him that night and we spent the better part of a few hours just hugging one another.”

  I waited for him to regain his composure. “We finally became brothers that night. We did everything together from that point on until he’d graduated early from high school and went cross country to college. I had a hard time dealing with that and saw Jocelyn again to work through those issues.”

  “I’m not sure I follow,” I admitted. “What issues exactly?”

  “I’d felt like he’d run off and left me. I knew he was at school, but I was mad because I was left behind.” He looked over at me, half smiling. “Garrett assured me that we’d always be brothers and would one day work together. He’d already decided to follow in his birth father’s footsteps and study engineering, but cross it with the fascination he’d found for my dad’s love of medicine. By the time he was in his junior year, I was in my freshman year at Duke University and decided to focus on business and law.”

  “I’ve been meaning to ask you, why the law part?” I understood the business side of things, but law?

  “Garrett had plans to start his own business with the money his parents had left and my father had invested for him. He loves all aspects of developing new gadgets and can spot faulty work and weak business plans a mile away, but he doesn’t have the patience to pursue or negotiate a contract. That’s where I come in.” He turned and winked at me.

  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “So all of you started the business together once you were out of college?”

  “Garrett had already begun designing the new machine for my dad as part of his graduate work at MIT. So the machine was ready for a patent and testing by the time he graduated. At the same time I’d finished up my bachelor’s and started negotiating a place he could do business in and expand, if needed. Sarah, our sister, was in the midst of getting her degree in architecture and design. She helped make good use of the building and designed the interior.” He stopped and thought for a second, then laughed. “I guess we did all go into business together.”

  He went on to add, “We’ve discussed how I’d gotten bored with things at work. That’s when I took a few classes, discovered a love for cooking and opened a bistro. I still did some consulting work for his business, but I couldn’t tolerate that bitch, Andrea. She seemed to fake to me and definitely had her claws into Garrett. I could see him trying to appease her and making bad decisions and I couldn’t sit around and continue to let that happen. I confronted him and told him I was leaving until he came to his senses.

  “When he finally saw reason, and she’d exposed herself for being a backstabbing bitch, he kicked her ass out of the picture and I came back to work part-time. I actually enjoy the thrill of negotiating a contract and ripping apart the ones that tried to pull a fast one on my brother. I love business—the art of making the deal.” He leaned over at a stop sign and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek.

  “I guess we share that interest, about making the deal. That’s what I love about pharmaceutical sales,” I admitted.

  We rode the rest of the way in silence. I knew he’d seen Jocelyn, but he always came up with a reason to change the topic before admitting why. I now understood. He was ashamed of being jealous of Garrett.

  ***

  “Okay, Grace. You have my attention, now what did you need?” Garrett sat behind a desk in his home office. I felt like a school girl in trouble with the principal, almost too afraid to talk.

  When I didn’t speak right away, he walked around and took a seat next to me. “We’re family, Grace, you can talk to me without worry. Now what’s wrong?”

  I swallowed hard. “I need to know if I only got my job with your company because you were in love with Laurel.” Phew, the words were h
ard to start but then came rushing out.

  He leaned back in his chair, his hand rubbing against his chin. “I’ve been expecting this question for a while. You’re like me, you don’t like handouts.”

  He moved forward, clasping his hands together and leaning across his knees. “I’ll be honest with you. I was prepared to do anything, and I do mean anything, to get Laurel to move down to Orlando. I was enamored by her and wanted the chance to know her better.

  “As you know, I gave you both the condo we had for business purposes just to get her in the same building as me. I could tell you two were close by the way she talked about you in her interview. I could sense she wouldn’t come without you.”

  My heart deflated. I’d gotten the job as a favor to Laurel.

  “But Evan is not easily swayed when it comes to hiring new people. He admitted that he’d have never interviewed you based on your resume alone. He did me a favor by granting the interview.”

  His hands raised in the air, giving the signal of surrender. “However, you blew him away with your confidence and knowledge of dealing with people in the medical profession. He didn’t bother to read your resume until after the interview and after he’d offered you a position.” Garrett was smiling at me.

  “So you mean the job was all my doing?”

  He nodded. “I got your foot in the door, but Evan is very adamant and picky about who he hires. He would never give someone a job just because I asked him to. He’s a vested party in the business. The more he grows it, the more stake he has in it. That’s our deal.”

  Garrett stood up. “Are there any other concerns?”

  I jumped up and hugged him. “No. I can’t thank you enough for being honest with me. This has been something that’s been bothering me for a while.”

  “Know that you can always ask me anything, Grace. You’re part of the family now.”

  “Thanks, Garrett.”

  He patted me on the back to reassure me. “Don’t mention it.”

  I was about to walk away when he asked, “Can I ask you something?”

  “Sure. Shoot!” I couldn’t help but smile.

  “Would you consider moving up within the WMI group as a manager?”

  My eyes nearly popped out of my head and I could feel my jaw drop to the floor. “Why?”

  “Over dinner tonight, my brother told me about your plan to ease his load at the restaurant, so he can focus on our company and spend more time with you. I think it’s a brilliant idea and exactly the kind of thinking we need at the main office.” Garrett’s words were very straight forward and his face serious.

  “Could I get through our wedding and honeymoon first before committing to anything?” I went down the mental list I’d had in my mind regarding the talk with my parents, my work, the rehearsal dinner, and so forth.

  He smiled. “I wouldn’t expect you to say yes right away. That’s the sign of a good business manager. Feel free to ask any questions, express any concerns, and we can negotiate when you get back from your honeymoon.”

  Garrett and I had our issues with one another early on in his and Laurel’s romance. I didn’t trust him, but he was exactly who she needed and he was one of the few people that held all of us together as an extended family. I had to admit, he’s my brother, or soon would be.

  Chapter 10

  The talk with Garrett had been smooth. Trying to find a time to get my parents together and willing to sit down and discuss our issues was just the opposite.

  When mine, Laurel’s, and Jonathan’s schedules aligned, they had dinner plans, were set to go see a movie, or any of a number of excuses. No matter what we offered, my mother countered with opposition. I guess their dinner and movie plans couldn’t be changed. They were obviously more important than their only daughter.

  I was hurting because all I wanted to do was talk and find out why there was so much distance between us. I only wanted to tell them how I felt and see if my suspicions about being a disappointment were true.

  Jonathan and Laurel thought they were behaving badly. They had confirmation from Dillon, one of Garrett’s security details, that my parents were home and nothing was on their agenda. How he managed to find this out, I don’t want to know. But they picked me up from work and we all drove over together to their house and parked ourselves at the front door until we were allowed in.

  My father was quite welcoming. He ushered us inside and offered to get us some drinks and snacks. My mother, on the other hand, looked ready to pitch a fit. I noticed her move toward us when my father stood in her path and told her, in a very firm, and surprisingly domineering, voice to “Sit down now, Lisa.”

  We were shocked when my mother sat down and scowled at us with her arms folded across her chest. “How dare you come over here without warning; we had plans for tonight.”

  It was surprising to see my father’s hands curl into fists as he punched the arm of the chair he was sitting in. “That’s enough, Lisa! I don’t want another word out of you. Our daughter has been trying to talk to us for some time now and you refuse to listen. I don’t like the distance that your attitude has created for us. We used to be so close and loving, and damn it, I want it back before it’s too late.”

  Jonathan sat on one side of me on their sofa, while Laurel was on the other. I felt his hand intertwine with mine while she squeezed my lower forearm on the other side, in show of support at my father’s outburst. I was hesitant to speak but finally found my courage and sarcasm. “So you’ve felt it too, Dad?”

  He leaned back in his chair and sighed. “Yes. I’ve felt it ever since that damn accident. You don’t know how many times I wish I could go back to that day and tell you that you couldn’t drive or come with me to run my errands. If I’d left you at home, you would still have your hand and your life might have turned out differently, been easier for you.”

  I watched as his hand ran through his hair and then down to his neck, where he flexed it in an attempt to relieve some tension. “I’ll regret that day for the rest of my life.”

  Wow. He just side swiped me with that piece of information. I had no clue that he felt bad about what happened. “It wasn’t your fault, Dad. Whether I’d been with you as the driver or the passenger or not at all, the accident would have happened, but you could have been the one hurt, or worse.”

  My mother piped up. “Don’t reveal any more, David.” Her tone was clipped and her face scrunched in disapproval.

  Why on earth would she want my father to keep quiet? “Why can’t he talk, Mom?” I raised my voice and let my pissed off expression cross my face so she’d have no doubt that she and I had issues.

  “She doesn’t want you to know that I could have reacted quicker if I hadn’t been looking at my cell phone that day. I heard the crash of the first car and could tell they were headed for us. Had I not been busy with the phone, I might have been able to pull you out of the driver’s seat and save you from going through that horrific experience.” He broke down in tears. “I should’ve been the one in the driver’s seat.”

  I rushed over to him and wrapped my arms around his shoulders to hug him tight. “It’s okay, Dad. You pulled me out enough that I didn’t get hurt any worse than I did. I could be dead right now had you not acted at all.”

  I felt my own tears forming. I had no idea my father carried the burden that he might have been able to prevent or alter my life, had he made different decisions that day. I finally got up enough courage to talk. “I thought you and Mom distanced yourself from me because I was no longer your “perfect” little girl. You’d both driven the idea of being flawless into my mind so hard that I thought I’d failed you.”

  His hands came up to brush the tears away from my face. “Honey, you could never fail me. You’re still perfect in my eyes. I’ve always been proud of you. No matter what obstacles have been thrown into your life, you seem to overcome them and find your own little niche.”

  He leaned back and laughed slightly before shaking his head. “All thi
s time wasted.”

  I knew my face was full of questions. “What’s wasted?”

  To our surprise, my mother spoke up. “We were devastated when you were in the hospital. We realized how close we came to losing our only child. Sure, we liked things as close to perfect as possible, but no matter what you did in life, you’d always be perfect in our eyes.”

  She came over to where I was kneeling at Dad’s feet and she joined me on the carpet. Her hand came up to caress the side of my face. “When you came home after the accident, we tried so hard to give you your old life back and make things as close to normal as possible. I guess that’s where we messed up. We were being overprotective and trying to force you to live a life you could no longer live.”

  She held her arms up to me for a hug and I nodded. I hadn’t felt the warmth of her embrace in years and finally broke down, sobbing. “We’re sorry, darling. We wanted life to go back to the way it was, while you took the initiative and moved forward, finding your own path to the new you. We should’ve been more supportive. Our biggest mistake is that we stepped back when you showed us you didn’t need us in your life. Instead we should’ve been there to help you. Our biggest failure was the lack of communication on our part.”

  “You did fail her.” I was surprised to hear Laurel pipe up. “She came to Donny and me for support. She couldn’t understand why you showed no happiness or emotion for anything she accomplished. Then when other things happened and she needed you most, you considered her moody and left her alone when, in reality, she needed you to push through her defense coping mechanisms, to be there for her.”

  Both of my parents stared at me with questioning eyes. “What other things?”

  I took in a deep breath, thinking of the ways I’d get back at Laurel for outing me. “My friends couldn’t accept the fact that I was different when I returned to school and dropped me. My boyfriend was already dating someone else and told me he couldn’t be seen with someone less than ideal. That’s when I fell into a group of people with interests similar to Laurel’s and discovered we had a lot in common. They behaved like true friends should, but my ability to trust had pretty much been demolished.”