by Lucinda John
“Excuse me?” I asked shocked at his words.
“I’m saying a nigga just wanna take you home and make sure you good. If I wanted to fuck, I would have been doing it.” he said causing a blow to my heart.
Just like every other nigga Mayhem thought I was some easy thot bitch because I was about my paper. Yes, in the eyes of another person I had hoe written all over me, but that wasn’t me. I was content with fucking and being with one nigga; until I was forced into this situation. I was always getting judged without people getting to know me first, that shit was starting to piss me off.
Grabbing my shoe off the hood of my car, I did my best to slip it on my feet without causing any more pain. I wiggled my body until I was on my feet, picked up my duffle bag and limped to my car. I didn’t know why my stupid ass decided to show some type of interest in Mayhem. I should have known he was like every other nigga only down for the ride. I was tarnished. There was no hope for me when it came to finding love.
I got in my car, slammed my door, and peeled off broken window and all. I drove around the block for an hour out of paranoia of Cash following me home. When I felt as if the coast was clear, I headed to my apartment. The burning sensation was too much for me to bear; so, I grabbed two Xanax and a Perk drowning them down with a shot of Hennessey.
The calm feeling started to take over me so I used this opportunity to wrap my ankle the best I could. When I was done, I hopped to my bag and placed all my money in the safe without counting it. I felt myself drifting to my happy place, so I hopped in my bed and allowed my mind to wander until sleep came and claimed me.
Macy
“I can’t lose him Joie!” I whined as I drowned my shot of Brandy.
“Slow down on the drinks sis.” Joie said grabbing the bottle from me.
“What you mean slow down, I’m going to through some shit because of your foul ass.” I snapped snatching the bottle back from her and pouring me another shot.
“Wait one fucking minute how is this shit my fault?” she asked looking at me sideways.
“Why didn’t you tell me your man was going to pick him up from jail, better yet, why didn’t you tell me about the fucking party?” I lashed out.
“Maleek told me this was a surprise and to keep my mouth closed. How the fuck was I supposed to know that the surprise was being kept from you? Don’t blame me because I recalled you telling him that he may be getting released on his birthday. That was your fault for not keeping up with that shit not me!” she countered.
“I was too busy trying to calm Robert’s ass. He was talking stupid about coming down here if I didn’t bring Mace to see him. I was so wrapped up in trying to cover up my tracks, his release and birthday slipped my fucking mind.” I replied taking another shot to the head.
“Are you going to tell Mayhem about Mace? I mean you should before he starts putting two- and- two together. What if Robert comes back?” Joie asked.
“I’ll deal with it. As long as I make those trips to New York with Mace, Robert will be ok.” I replied.
“This is fucked up what you’re doing. If Maleek finds out that I knew anything about this, he is going to blow the fuck up.” she said taking a shot to the head.
“You have no choice but to keep my fucking secret, didn’t I help you get and keep Maleek?” I shot at her.
While Joie was dating Maleek, Stacy was a big issue for them. Matter of fact, Maleek was falling for Stacy to the point where he wouldn’t give Joie the time of day. I never really like Stacy. She was nothing but a washed up gold digger who had no type of respect for herself or anyone else for that matter.
When Joie came to me looking real sick over the possibility of losing Maleek, I stepped in. Grabbing one of Mayhem’s gun and a bag that contained thirty thousand dollars’ cash, Joie and I paid Stacy a visit. Our intentions were to pay her to disappear, but we had the gun as back up just in case we had to force her to leave town. The moment her eyes fell on the neatly stacked bills it was nothing for her to jump ship. Thus, confirming she wasn’t really with Maleek out of love like Joie was.
For days Maleek went crazy trying to get in contact with Stacy while Joie and I sipped Patron Margaritas with smirks on our face. When Maleek realized that Stacy wasn’t coming back, he moved on giving Joie a fair chance at his heart. Now, they have a beautiful daughter, engaged, and living their happy lifestyle with their big house and white picket fence. Joie would forever be in debt to me.
“Why do you keep holding that against me when you don’t get your way.” she snapped.
“Because I’m the reason for your fucking happiness, if it wasn’t for me you would have been back in the hood rocking them big cheap ass gold hoops with that dusty jean jacket and run down Jordan’s. I am the reason for your come up.” I spat while wagging my French stiletto nail in her face.
“It’s not always about the fucking money! I’m not with Maleek for his money. I’m with him because I love him.” her pathetic ass had the nerve to say.
“Bitch please love can’t keep you warm, having a roof over your head can and only a man with money can keep ya ass sheltered. I love Robert, but Robert can’t do for me what my husband can and that is why I need your fucking help!”
“You are fucking delusional. You mentioned you love Robert, but what about Mayhem? You spent over a decade with him.”
“I love Mayhem. I will always love him, but I’m not in love with him.” I truthfully answered.
I was one down for being the wife of a boss, but I didn’t like the bad that came with it. I was okay with the shopping sprees, jets, vacations, and all the other lavish things, but I was not built to hold a nigga down while he went to jail. When Mayhem went to jail I started feeling lonely, that’s when I turned to a dating app. I wasn’t expecting to find anyone, but when Robert and I started talking we clicked. He was a music teacher who made crumbs bi-weekly, but he was so damn sexy, sweet, and easy to talk to.
After talking for months, I decided to send him a plane ticket so we could finally meet. We shacked up in a hotel that was near the airport for the entire weekend fucking and getting to know one another. We carried out our once a month rendezvous until I got pregnant with Mace. Since I wasn’t sure who his father was, I ended up feeding Mayhem a sob story about how moving to New York to be closer to my family would be what was best for me and the kids. Once he bought the story I would pay my mother visit regularly and spent the majority of my time with Robert who lived an hour away from her.
I avoided contacting Mayhem’s family in fear that Mace would come out looking like Robert. I didn’t want them to call me out on my infidelity so I decided to stay away. When Mace was born and came out looking just like me I was ecstatic until I received a call from Mayhem saying that he wanted to have a divorce. To fix my marriage and stability, I headed back home and played the happy wife role while trying to keep Robert away. I was so focused on making sure Robert didn’t fuck shit up for me that I ended up forgetting my husband’s birthday even worse his release day.
“Since you want to sit here and daydream and shit, I’m out.” Joie said snapping me out of my thoughts.
“Joie, I didn’t mean anything I said. I’m just down about everything, and plus I had too much to drink.” I said trying to smooth things over. Despite everything, I adored the friendship I held with Joie, she was more like a sister to me than a friend.
“It’s cool.” Joie shrugged.
“Call me when you get home.” I replied reaching for a hug.
“Will do, don’t drink too much love. We’ll figure it out.” she said grabbing her smoke black Prada bag, and the keys to her brand new Lexus truck.
“Thanks.”
“Anytime boo, lock up.”
When Joie was gone I was left alone. Mayhem took the children with him to his mother’s where he was spending the majority of his time. He argued that they needed to get better acquainted with his side of the family since I kept them away so long, but I hated every second Mace wasn’t
with me. I hated for Mayhem to look at him too long just so he wouldn’t figure out that Mace wasn’t his.
Before I could get up and grab me another bottle my phone started ringing, and Robert was the caller. I started to ignore his call, but I knew he would grow persistent and only call more. I even thought about changing my number altogether, but Robert threatened to come to seek legal help if I ever decided to keep him out of his son’s life.
“Yes.” I slurred.
“Hey. How’s Mace?” he asked.
“He’s fine.” I replied keeping it short.
“FaceTime me. I miss him.”
“He’s not home.” I closed my eyes to relieve the headache I felt myself getting.
“Where is he?”
“With his grandmother.”
“Both of our mother’s live in New York so what grandmother is this?” he asked causing me to chew the inside of my jaw.
“My husband’s mother. He’s still Mace stepfather weather you like it or not.” I argued.
“Does your husband know that Mace is his stepson?” he asked.
“Why are you doing this? You knew I was married before we started sleeping around.”
“You also told me that you were in love with me and didn’t even want to be married to him anymore.” he lashed out.
“Robert what is the purpose of this call?” I asked changing the subject.
“To check on my son.”
“Well, he’s fine goodbye.”
“Macy when are you going to bring him to come see me?”
“I can’t right now.”
“Why baby? I miss the both of you?” he said causing me to blush.
“I miss you too, but I need time. He just got out of jail I can’t leave him now.” I lied.
“Come see me. Just tell him you’re bringing the kids to see your mother and come see me.”
“What about Maliah and Mariah?”
“Leave them with your mother.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Macy don’t fuck with me. I will serve you a petition of custody. Don’t keep me away from my son.” he replied making me regret allowing him to get Mace tested.
“Ok I’ll figure it out baby.”
“Good, I love you ma, kiss my baby for me.”
“I love you too.” I replied hanging the phone up.
Despite the constant arguments Robert and I have over Mace, I couldn’t help but still love him. Robert was the perfect guy for me. The only problem was his financial status. I was comfortable with being Mrs. Godfrey. I didn’t have to lift a finger if I didn’t want to. Being with Robert would be a major downgrade; my mother would slap me silly for leaving a rich man to be with one that was living paycheck- to- paycheck.
Mayhem
“Tineah “Tiny” Thomas.” Maleek said dropping a small file on my desk that he was able to obtain from Tasty’s.
“It’s something about shorty.” I said looking at the picture. The club owner took of her as a part of the hiring process.
“She’s a thot.” Ramsey said popping open a can of soda.
“Just because she strips doesn’t mean she’s a thot.” I replied in her defense.
“Yeah but shorty having a heavy body count on her does.”
“Did you fuck her?” I asked him.
“Nah, I’on do thots.” he replied chugging the soda.
“Shut the fuck up, you’ll do a tranny if you didn’t know she was once a man.” I joked.
“Fuck that. I gotta feel that pussy before I do anything.” he replied.
“Man these niggas paying to have pussies and shit.” Maleek added.
“I’m good on that I’m rocking with Emma now, and I already know she’s all woman, saw baby pictures and all plus that pussy to wet to not be real.” he laughed humping the side of my desk.
“Nigga you a fool.” I waved him off.
“So what you about to do with shorty?” Maleek asked.
“Imma have Max fix her car, and shit, I feel bad about fucking that nigga up on her ride.” I replied.
“Think about this shit man, Cash is a fucking pimp why else would he be laying paws on the trick?” Ramsey said causing me to cut my eyes at him.
“Shut the fuck up. You really need to watch the shit that comes out of your mouth.” I snapped.
“Damn you coming at me on the flip about some been around the world girl.” he replied grilling me.
One thing about Ramsey was nothing pumped fear in his heart. That lil nigga would stand toe- to- toe with me no matter how many times I beat his eyes. The fact that he had heart was what made me proud but his mouth was foul as fuck.
“Y’all chill out.” Maleek reasoned.
“Get this nigga Leek.” I fumed.
“Yeah ok.” Ramsey waved me off.
“Send Biggs to pay Cash a visit I want to make sure he makes no contact with Tiny whatsoever.” I said to Maleek which made Ramsey suck his teeth.
“You better go brush them shits in my office sucking your fucking teeth like you lost your damn mind.” I snapped.
“Fuck you!” Ramsey yelled.
“I ain’t on that gay shit nigga pussy is all I know.” I shot back causing Maleek to fall out laughing.
“You niggas are fools.”
“Shit, that’s this nigga catching a bitch fit over what I do with my spare time. Back to business, how is the trucking company coming along.” I said switching the conversation up.
“Shit on point, we gotta interview a bunch of niggas, but the truck and everything else is good to go.” Ramsey replied.
“That’s what I’m talking about, how is ma interior decorating business coming along?”
“A pain in the ass, you know ma a damn perfectionist. She’s giving the contractor a hard time.” Maleek chuckled shaking his head.
“Ma is a headstrong woman. It’s her way or the highway.” I replied with a few chuckles of my own. I could only imagine the hell my mother was giving those contractors.
“I have a meeting with my lawyer in a few so we gotta wrap this up.” I said looking down at my all diamond 18k gold watch.
“Divorce?” Maleek asked.
“Yes, I’m serious about that shit. I feel in my heart something ain’t right, her pussy ain’t even the same. I feel all fucked up in the head that my bitch put me to the side when I needed her the most. Shit but you know what they say about prison, sitting in that bitch alone with your thoughts would have you looking at shit in a different perspective. That’s how I was able to come up with all these business ideas and conclude that the bitch I married ain’t shit.” I spat feeling my anger rise.
The more I thought of how fucked up Macy did me the more I couldn’t help but question her loyalty. I started questioning our whole relationship and her intentions. My father didn’t raise me a fucking fool he always told me to follow your gut feeling because that was your inner caution telling you to take heed to certain situation. My gut was all bubbly when it came to that bitch. Therefore, I had no reason to keep her around.
“When you moving out?” Ramsey asked.
“I’m giving it some time, I want to bond with my kids and shit since I been away all their lives.” I replied.
“Macy is going to flip the fuck out when you move out.” Maleek said.
“Who gives a fuck? She should have thought about that before she decided to play my ass for a fool.” I replied with a clenched jaw.
“Damn, I never thought I’d see this day, you and Macy were like Bey and Jay of the game.” Maleek replied.
“Everything that glitters ain’t gold.” I huffed.
“You over there sounding like pop.” Maleek laughed. “I may look just like that nigga, but you all pops.” he went on to say.
“Make sure the deposits for the night clubs are made. I’m out. I replied grabbing my old leather Partners briefcase. I stood from my executive desk chair and straightened my Brioni navy blue suit jacket.
“I’m about to go fuck with Emma
at work so I’m out.” Ramsey replied dapping us up.
The three of us walked out of The Godfrey Brothers Empire, which was a three-story office building we purchased for business purposes. My office was on the third floor, Maleek’s on the second and Ramsey’s on the first. When it came down to business we would lock ourselves in our personal office for the entire day handling business. Walking to my Porsche Spyder, I watched as Maleek drove off in his cocaine white Ferrari, and Ramsey speed off on his custom made Harley bike before I headed off to my lawyer’s office.
