That afternoon I sat with Mia while she showed me how to use some of the computer packages I’d not used before. I had to admit, she was a great teacher; either that or I was a great student as I picked it up so quickly that she got through two days worth of training in one afternoon. We spoke about her new job and she told me that she would be working for one of the most prestigious advertising agencies and although the job was entry-level it was full of perks. She showed me a picture of her new apartment. It was gorgeous. I’d always been jealous of her but now I was positively green with envy! She had everything. She told me she was hoping to get half of her husband’s millions when they divorced, but if Claire was right, I’m sure she’d be lucky to get anything at all. When I’d finished showing Mia I understood how to design posters, I was allowed to sit with Doreen and finish off some of my own work.
‘I hope you don’t turn into a cow when you get Mia’s job,’ Doreen said with a giggle.
‘You know me, Dor.’
‘Yeah. You’ll be ok. You’ll ‘ave to come out ‘ere and share cakes with me at break, though.’
‘Even better, you can come into my office!’
She giggled. ‘We can have discos and everything! No-one will know!’
I was going to miss sitting next to Doreen. Being alone in that huge office was one thing I wasn’t looking forward to. I enjoyed working with people, having a chat and a gossip. I was looking forward to meeting Mark tonight though. I would finally get the chance to hear how he realizes his mistake and wants us to get back together. I would play it cool, at first, but then I would throw my arms around him and we would kiss passionately and then we would end up in bed together at his apartment and that would be it – we would be an official couple again only this time I’d make more of an effort so that he’d have no reason to look elsewhere ever again. I still missed freckly Mark a little bit. I cried myself to sleep for a few nights but then I just stopped thinking about him and started thinking about my Mark again and our reunion.
***
Catherine had excelled herself this time. Feeling full of confidence I made my way downstairs and out of the front door. It was weird walking to Mark’s apartment again after all this time. He lived further away than Freckly Mark but too near to make it worthwhile getting a bus or a taxi – it was quicker and cheaper to walk there. I wished I’d worn comfier shoes, but I was deliberately making an effort – no more trainers for me. These high heels would have Mark drooling, hopefully.
My stomach was full of butterflies dive-bombing wildly as I knocked on the door. Mark answered and it was like looking at a stranger. I wasn’t expecting to feel like this. I thought he would be familiar and it would be like we’d never been apart, but it wasn’t like I’d expected. Mark appeared to be nervous too. ‘Come in,’ he said with an air of formality. ‘Would you like a drink?’
‘A lager would be nice,’ I replied. In the past I would have sat down on the settee after getting my own lager, but this time I hesitated. It was strange being here after all this time.
‘Sit down,’ he said; pointing to the settee we’d sat on so many times together.
I sat and felt uneasy when he sat down next to me. He passed me my lager and I felt nothing as our hands touched. I put this thought out of my mind as I looked into his blue eyes. He looked tanned and well-groomed, as usual, but I didn’t feel any spark.
‘So, why did you want to see me?’ I asked.
He placed his lager onto the floor. ‘We can talk about that later. First tell me what you’ve been up to.’
I didn’t feel comfortable with the way he’d changed the subject so I asked again. ‘I’d rather just get straight to the point.’
He sat back and stretched his arms. ‘I don’t know where to start, really. I thought we could have a catch up first. I’ve missed you, you know.’
My heart started to beat quicker. He’s missed me. I knew it. ‘Have you? I’ve missed you too.’
He smiled and bent down to get his lager. He took a sip. ‘When you’ve seen somebody every day for nine years it’s weird when you suddenly stop seeing them, you know?’
‘Yeah. It was your idea, though.’ I sipped my lager and stared at my feet. I was starting to like my new shoes.
‘You look great by the way,’ he said.
‘Thanks. You do too.’
There was a distinctly awkward atmosphere. It wasn’t how it used to be at all. Things had changed. Maybe people were right about him; I shouldn’t get back with him.
‘I saw you on Facebook with her,’ I said.
He looked confused. ‘Who?’
‘Your new girlfriend.’
He placed his lager down again. ‘My new girlfriend isn’t on my Facebook page.’
‘What?’
‘I can’t put her on there.’
‘Why not?’
‘I just can’t.’
‘So who’s the slutty brunette in your main photo?’
He laughed. ‘That’s Monica.’
‘And who’s she?’
‘She’s just this girl who keeps flirting with me. She keeps messaging me telling me where she’ll be and to be honest she’s a bit of a stalker. I had a fall out with my girlfriend a few weeks ago and I sort of copped off with Monica at a club and ever since then she keeps trying it on. She’s got a fella though and I’ve got a girlfriend so nothing’s happened since.’
‘So what does your girlfriend think about you having Monica splashed all over your Facebook page?’
‘She knows all about it. She’s glad. People don’t suspect anything if they see me with Monica.’
‘What do you mean?’
He took a deep breath in. ‘My girlfriend’s not my PA. She’s a married woman, ok?’
I was shocked. ‘What? How could you!’
‘She’s not married any more, they’re separated.’
‘Because of you, right?’
‘We didn’t mean for it to happen – it just did!’
‘So why did you ask me over tonight? You don’t want to get back together with me do you?’
He laughed sarcastically. ‘What gave you that idea?’
‘I don’t know. I guess I just thought you’d realize what a mistake you made that’s all.’
‘But I didn’t make a mistake, Tez. We grew apart. I grew up and you didn’t.’
I got angry. ‘What do you mean by that?’
‘Come on Tez, look at yourself. I left school, went to Uni got an entry level accounts job and now I’m a partner in my firm. I have ambition and I need a woman who’s got ambition too. All you wanted to do was stay local, get yourself a dead-end job and have an easy life. You need to get out of your comfort zone and do something different!’
‘For your information I’m a marketing assistant now!’
‘I know but that’s only because Mia’s leaving!’
I paused to digest what he’d just said. How did he know about it? I hadn’t told him. Then it hit me. I looked at him. He was avoiding eye contact, gulping his lager.
‘Oh my god – it’s her isn’t it? You’re Mia’s bit on the side!’
I felt like I’d been hit by a truck. I sat back down and started to gulp my lager down- fast. ‘So, when did it happen, then? When did you first meet her?’
‘It was at your Christmas party.’
I walked to the fridge and got some more lager. Now that there was no chance of a reunion I could relax a bit more. ‘How could you do this to me? With my own boss as well! I always thought she was a cow but all this time she was telling me to get over my problems when she was the cause of them all! What a total bitch! It’s a good job she’s leaving otherwise I’d have to kill the cow!’
‘For your information she feels terrible about the whole thing! She’s dreading Monday when you go to her for your training.’
‘I bet she only gave me her job because of her guilt! Well you know what? I think I’ll take a lesson from you – on Monday I’m gonna step right out of my comfort zon
e! If she thinks she can take my fiancé from me without a fight she’s more of an idiot than I thought!’
‘Tez, calm down. Don’t lose your new job whatever you do.’
‘So now you’re saying I should stay in my comfort zone? You’re full of shit, Mark! I don’t know what I ever saw in you in the first place!’
He looked hurt. ‘You don’t mean that.’
‘I do, though. Right now I don’t know why I ever wanted to marry you. You’re right; you did me a huge favour cancelling the wedding. And you know what else? If you had asked me to get back with you tonight I wouldn’t have – I love somebody else now, not you.’ I don’t know whether it was the drink talking or not but the words came out of my mouth before they’d registered in my brain. Now that I’d said them I knew they were true. I didn’t love Mark, not ex Mark anyway – I loved Freckly Mark.
‘So is this Monica’s brother you’re talking about, then?’ Mark stood up and walked towards the fridge. He took out a sausage roll and started to eat it, dropping crumbs all over his carpet.
‘How do you know about Mark? It seems you know everything I do, lately.’
‘Monica saw a picture of you on Facebook; the one from Paul’s wedding. Paul put it on there; anyway Monica recognized you and told me you were seeing her brother. It’s no big deal.’
‘And that’s when you told her we’d been engaged.’
‘Well what was I supposed to tell her?’
‘You do realize that you’ve ruined things between me and Mark. I hadn’t told him I’d been engaged and I didn’t tell him I knew you were seeing his sister, either.’
‘So, that’s not my fault. You should have been honest with him right from the start.’
‘Like you know anything about honesty you cheating pig!’
‘Now there’s no need for that!’
Obviously not a student of body-language himself, he came over to me, attempting to give me a hug. I took the opportunity to hit him hard across his face.
‘Ow!’ he screamed, ‘what did you do that for you psycho!’
I’d drank too much and I’d had a shock finding out about Mark and Mia. It all became too much for me; I burst into tears and collapsed onto the settee. Mark came and put his arms around me again and this time I didn’t have the energy or the inclination to push him away. ‘If you want, I’ll get in touch with Monica and sort things out for you,’ he said.
‘Don’t bother; you’ll only make it worse.’ I looked at him and felt glad that I finally had closure. I could let him go now. His blue eyes were watery and I knew we’d always have the past but that it could no longer ruin our futures. ‘So you’re going to New York then?’ I asked.
He nodded and brushed my hair away from my eyes. ‘It’s probably for the best now, isn’t it? A clean break?’
‘Yeah. Is that why you asked me round here? To say goodbye.’
‘Yeah. I’m starting to think it was a bad idea now though!’ He laughed, which eased the tension and I laughed too.
‘No. It was a great idea and I’m glad you thought of me.’
His eyes watered again. ‘Of course I thought of you. Like you said, we were together nine years and almost married! You’ve been a big part of my life.’
I hugged him. ‘Thanks. I’m so glad we had this talk. I know what I have to do now.’
‘I hope that doesn’t mean killing Mia!’ He laughed again.
‘I’m over that now and I think I’m finally over us too.’
He smiled. ‘We were just kids weren’t we? Maybe if we were just meeting up now things would be different?’
‘I guess.’
We sat there for a while longer just holding each other. I felt a sense of peace wash over me, that I hadn’t felt for a long time. I could move on now. Once I’d seen Mia for the last time I could say goodbye to my past and look to the future – hopefully a future with Freckly Mark in it.
Chapter Thirteen
Decisions, decisions
Mia looked nervous as I took my place next to her. I could see why Mark was attracted to her; not only was she beautiful but she was ambitious too. She was also a cow but maybe she didn’t show Mark that side of her.
‘Terri,’ she said, ‘I’m glad you decided to come into the room so amicably.’
‘You know if I’d found out about you and Mark straight away I would probably have killed you but now that I’ve realized I’m finally over him I actually pity you.’
Her eyes widened, ‘Why would you pity me?’
‘Because you’re giving up everything and taking a chance on a cheating pig, that’s why. For your sake I hope he can keep it in his pants.’
She shook her head. ‘I think we’d better crack on with this, don’t you?’ She opened the publishing package our company used for designing letterheads.
We sat in silence for the rest of the training, only speaking about work; once we’d done I went back to my own desk and told Doreen the gossip.
‘What a cow!’ she said, ‘Well, we knew she was a cow, anyway but this is even worse than ever! Do you want me to kill her for you, love, because I’m too old to go to prison,’ she giggled as she continued to type.
‘Oh, Dor, you’re so funny! You cheer me up.’
‘No, but seriously though, someone needs to put the bitch in her place!’
‘I’m over it now, Dor. She’s done me a favour in a weird sort of way.’
‘Yeah, you’re better off without him, love. So does that mean you are going to start getting serious with your new man then?’
‘I can’t, Dor. He doesn’t want to know. He said he’ll never trust me again. No, I think I’ll concentrate on my new job for a while – men are too much of a distraction. At least I won’t have any personal problems to bring in to work, will I?’
Doreen laughed and opened her desk drawer. She took out two chocolate bars and handed me one. ‘They say a chocolate bar is a substitute for love so get that down you.’
I bit into the creamy chocolate as I thought about Freckly Mark. The chocolate reminded me of his eyes. It was so ironic that when I was with him all I could think about was my ex Mark and getting him back when now all I could think about was getting Freckly Mark back, yet at the same time I didn’t want to risk getting my heart broken all over again. It was hurting me already and we’d only been dating less than six months – imagine how I’d feel if he dumped me in nine years time? I continued to eat the rest of the chocolate as I finished sending emails telling my customers about my promotion.
***
I went round to Claire’s that evening. I’d promised to tell her all about my date with Mark. She was shocked when I told her about him and Mia. She was also upset that she hadn’t managed to get the gory details from her work colleague first, to spare me the embarrassment of finding out the way I did. I told her it didn’t matter as going to see Mark had given me the closure I needed so that I could move on.
‘So that’s definitely it then. You’re totally over Mark?’ she said before shoving a prawn cocktail crisp into her mouth.
‘Well, not exactly,’ I said.
She rolled her eyes. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, I’m over my ex but I don’t think I’m over freckly Mark?’
‘Ok, first things first. Now that you’re over your ex Mark let’s just call freckly Mark, Mark from now on, is that ok? All this freckly Mark this, Freckly Mark that is getting really annoying.’
‘I know, I only said it so you didn’t get mixed up between him and the other one.’
‘I know, so like I said, let’s just call him Mark and you can call the other one ex if you like.’
‘Ok. Well, anyway, I think I might be falling for Mark. I can’t stop thinking about him. I really miss him.’
‘Look, I was right about your ex, wasn’t I? He didn’t want you back? Well, I don’t think Mark wants you back, babes, otherwise he would have called you.’
I bit into a crisp. ‘I know. I thought he would call. I
really thought he liked me.’
‘I know. I think you need to forget about men for a while and come hit the town with me!’
‘I don’t know…’
‘Come on. It’ll be a laugh.’
I knew then that I’d fallen for Mark. I never usually turned down a night out with Claire. I just wanted to be by myself for a while, to think things over; work out what I was going to do to get back with Mark.
Chapter Fourteen
A surprise visit
It was the first day in my new role. Mia had gone. She’d gone quietly too – no big send off. I was glad about that as I wouldn’t have gone and half the office wouldn’t have either – probably why she didn’t have one. Lots of people have come up to me recently and congratulated me on my new job. I think they’re glad that the office will be a bitch-free zone from now on. I was happy to find out that Danielle was going to be my new PA. We’d gotten on so well when she came as a temp; Steve liked her too and so now she was here permanently. I’d asked her to hold all my calls while I attempted to get to grips with a poster using the publishing package I’d struggled with. Despite this the phone started to ring.
‘Danielle, I thought I asked you to hold my calls,’ I said, hoping I didn’t sound too bitchy.
‘I know that, Miss Gordon, it’s just there’s someone here asking to see you.’
‘What, here in the office?’
‘Yeah, it’s a girl; she said you know her, Monica Wyatt.’
Getting him Back Page 6
