by CK Dawn
“This is why you were crying earlier, isn’t it? You knew they were sending me away.”
He nodded and then reached over to pull me into yet another hug. I stretched across the middle console to bury my face in his shoulder. My tears soaked his cotton shirt.
Eventually, I pulled away and wiped my eyes dry. “I don’t get it, Dad. How could they even pull this off? I’m supposed to start school in a week.”
He shrugged and stared out in front of him at the unopened garage door. “Carson has friends in high places. He can do almost anything he wants.”
“Why hide the truth about our ancestors?”
His gaze flickered toward mine before fixing it back in front of him. “I really can’t say much.”
“But you’re on the council. You must know this stuff,” I accused.
He took a deep breath and then turned to me again. “Believe me, Bree. As much as it hurts to watch you leave, Carson was telling the truth when he said it was what was best. For now, at least. Just trust me that everything is going to be all right.”
I nodded and fell into his arms again, but I didn’t trust him. This all just felt so wrong. How could it be all right?
Four
My father and I sat in the car weeping for my departure until my mother drove up to park beside us in the driveway. By now, the tears had already dried.
“Does she know?” I asked my dad.
He nodded. “She doesn’t know everything, but she knows you’re leaving.”
I cleared my throat to keep the tears from rising again. “I guess you’re right. It will be easier if she doesn’t know the reason.”
Honestly, I wasn’t even sure I knew the reason. But I knew I couldn’t continue asking questions. My father would only insist he couldn’t answer them, and I only hoped that by allowing him his secrets, I could also keep him safe from whatever wrath Carson Ray would lay upon him should he open his mouth.
I won’t tell anyone, I repeated to myself. As long as they don’t know, Carson can’t send them away. They can live peacefully here in Sea Haven.
I still wasn’t entirely convinced I’d be headed on a plane to a new school in a few hours. I was betting on the alternative: they were going to drop me out of the plane without a parachute. Carson Ray would probably do the honors himself. I did my best to hide these thoughts as I clicked the door open and stepped out onto the concrete to greet my mother.
She’d already exited her vehicle and stood with outstretched arms. “Bree, honey! I heard about your recommendation from Mrs. Ray. Congratulations!”
My whole body froze for a beat. Wait. She was happy about this? I forced my feet to continue moving, and I fell into her arms. Her frame was so much smaller than my father’s that it seemed strange after hugging him all day. Her blue nurse scrubs were itchy against my bare arms. I wasn’t sure how she managed to wear them all day at the clinic. Her brown hair—the same shade as mine—danced slightly in the breeze and tickled my nose. I pulled away from her and forced a smile on my face, once again reminding myself that lying was the best option here. Don’t break her happy bubble.
“Yeah, I guess I have a real knack for journalism.”
My father cleared his throat from behind me, reminding me to keep the sarcasm from my voice.
“I’m just so sad you’re leaving,” my mom said.
I shrugged. “I was going to head to college in a week anyway.”
“I know, but you would have still been in Sea Haven. You would have been able to visit every day.”
My brows shot up involuntarily. “Well, I don’t know about every day.”
My mother laughed, which made the keys to her Prius jingle in her hand. “I know, but at least you would have had the option. Now you’ll be halfway across the country.” Her smile quickly turned to a frown.
“It’s great news, really,” my father said, taking a step toward us. “It’s not like she’s the first young adult in Sea Haven to leave for college.”
“Right,” my mom agreed before looking back at me. “I just didn’t think you’d be one to leave for college. But your father’s right. If you want a career in journalism, then you have to follow your dreams. It’s great news that you got in; although, they’re kind of late on sending out their acceptance letters, huh?”
I opened my mouth to say something—I didn’t know what yet—but my dad cut in.
“She was on a waiting list,” he lied. He shot me a look that told me to just go with it. “Why don’t we go inside and discuss this in there?” He ushered us toward the door.
My mother dropped her purse next to the couch and took a seat. I sat opposite her, and my father plopped down into his recliner. I gazed between the two of them, daring one of them to speak first. My mother rose to the challenge.
“I’m just so proud of you, Bree,” she raved.
Proud of me for uncovering secrets the council has been holding from us and being sent away so I don’t spill them? I thought, but I simply smiled back instead.
“Not many teens are willing to leave Sea Haven after high school. You’re going to come back with so much insight about the world. You’re going to learn so much!” She bounced on her cushion excitedly.
I quickly looked to my father to gauge his reaction to her words. Would I be coming back? Or were they sending me away forever? He kept his eyes locked on my mother, but I couldn’t read them. I knew he was avoiding my gaze.
I turned back to my mother. “I really don’t want to say goodbye.”
Her expression softened. “I know. But remember, it’s only four years, and you’ll be back over holiday breaks and summer vacation. And hey, we can have a going away party for you.”
My heart broke. She seemed awfully excited to see me leave Sea Haven. She doesn’t know the truth, I reminded myself. She doesn’t understand what’s really going on, and it’s better this way.
“Uh, Carol,” my father said, leaning forward in his chair.
She turned to him, curious eyebrows raised.
“Bree has to leave for school tonight.”
“What?” She looked between me and my father. “No, not tonight.”
My father and I nodded solemnly in unison.
“No.” Her voice cracked, which oddly made me feel better. “I’m not ready to say goodbye yet. This is…all just so sudden.” She placed her hand to her head like she was afraid she might pass out.
I couldn’t bear to see her like this. I scooted across the couch and pulled her into another hug. “It’s okay, Mom. I’ll be okay. We’ll throw a going away party of our own. What do you say to whipping up some of your famous chocolate chip cookies?”
Her eyes lit up. “But, Bree, you never want to cook with me.”
This may be my last chance. I smiled back at her. “Well, I’m going to need some cookies for the road.”
My mom offered to wash my laundry while I said goodbye to my friends. When Liana didn’t answer my text asking to meet up, I stepped out the back door and headed toward the beach. I hoped she would be there. If I didn’t catch her before I had to leave, I’d never forgive myself for not saying goodbye.
At the beach, I scanned the throng of people. By now, the crowd was even thicker than when we’d gone swimming earlier. I stood on my toes, hoping to find her lying on the sand or splashing in the waves. But I didn’t see her.
I let out my breath and fell back onto my heels. She could be in the water, but I was in jeans and a tee. I didn’t want to just dive in to look for her fully dressed. Besides, she may not even be here. I glanced around again, hoping to spot her blond hair somewhere. Just as I was about to give up, I recognized her pink beach bag lying in the sand.
Hope surged through me once again. I began my way through the crowd, hoping another angle of the beach might help me find her.
This is useless, I finally admitted to myself. She was probably under water somewhere. I had just decided that I’d run home and get my swimming suit when I noticed a girl in a purple bikini
bent down near Liana’s bag.
“Christina!” I called, hurrying toward her.
She flipped her wet brunette hair out of her face and scanned the crowd.
“Christina!” I called again, closer this time.
Finally, she spotted me. She straightened up and took a swig from her water bottle.
“Hey, girl,” she greeted after she swallowed. “What are you wearing? You’re at the beach in jeans?”
I knew she was only teasing, but I was agitated for already wasting so much of my time searching for Liana. “I stopped by looking for you and Liana. Do you two want to come over?”
She smiled, revealing a dimple on her left cheek. “Sure. We were almost done anyway.”
“Do you mind letting Liana know? I’m not exactly dressed for swimming.” I gestured down to my jeans.
Christina pointed her chin toward the water as she rummaged through her bag. “Here she comes now.”
I turned to find a dripping wet Liana heading our way.
“Hey. What’s up?” She bent to her bag and pulled out a towel.
Christina spoke while drying off. “Bree asked if we wanted to hang at her place for a while.”
“Sure, sounds fun,” Liana agreed.
On the walk back to my house, dread overcame me. I had no idea how I was going to explain this all to them.
Back at my house, we headed straight to my bedroom. Well, that’s one way to tell them, I thought when I opened my door. On my bed sat a huge suitcase we hadn’t used in years. The last time I remembered seeing it was when my dad went on a business trip a few years go. My mom must have pulled it out of her closet for me. It was still covered in a thin layer of dust.
“Going somewhere?” Christina asked, plopping her beach bag onto my bed next to the suitcase. She pulled her coverall out of it and slipped it on. Liana did the same from near the doorway.
I bit my lip and turned to them. “Actually, yeah. I am.”
“Packing for college already?” Liana laughed. “Even I’m not that excited. I figured if I forget anything, I can just run home and get it.”
I took a deep breath. I didn’t know what to do with myself, so I settled with sitting on my bed across from Christina. Liana sank to the floor by my closet and crossed her legs.
“Well, it’s going to be kind of hard for me to just come home and get anything.” I did my best to avoid their gazes and instead poked at a stray thread coming out of my jeans.
“What are you talking about, Bree?” Christina insisted. I felt her shift from the opposite side of the bed.
I sighed. There was no easy way to say it. Just spit it out. “I’m leaving Sea Haven.”
“You’re what?” Liana shot up from the floor.
Christina simply gave me a confused expression.
“I got into a good college in Illinois. I’m leaving tonight.”
“You’re kidding me, right?” Liana asked.
They both stared at me until I couldn’t take the silence anymore.
“I’m serious. I got in last minute, and I have to go. It’s a really good opportunity for me.” My gut twisted at the lie. Was there really no way out of this?
Christina narrowed her eyes like she didn’t believe me.
Liana’s eyes, on the other hand, widened. “You can’t move across the country! We’re supposed to be roommates! Why didn’t you say anything about this before?”
Her voice faded into the background as the tears threatened once again. I didn’t want to leave her, and here she was blaming me like it was my decision. I took another deep breath. I can’t tell her the truth. I can’t. If I do, they’ll come after my friends next.
“I thought you were undecided anyway,” Liana was saying as her words became clear to me again. “Why can’t you at least get your gen eds out of the way here?”
“It’s a good school,” I told them. I actually had no idea. I didn’t even know the name of the school I was being shipped off to; I didn’t catch that during our meeting earlier. All I could focus on at the time was that it was halfway across the country where I’d be far, far away from the ocean.
“A good school for what?” Liana asked. “What’s wrong with our university?”
I hated this. “I’m going to be a journalist.” I forced myself not to say, I guess. It wasn’t exactly my choice, now was it?
“Since when did you want to be a journalist?” Liana’s voice softened, and she fidgeted with the hem of her dress.
I shrugged, but inside of me, a fire burned. It took all I had to hold that fire in. “I don’t know. It’s just something I’m going to do.” I couldn’t even manage to spit out the lie and tell them I wanted to do it, but neither of them seemed to notice that it wasn’t my choice. Still, they chewed me out like it was, like I was somehow betraying them.
“But people don’t just leave Sea Haven,” Liana pointed out.
“Yeah, they do,” I said like it happened all the time, but it didn’t. Only one or two people left per year, and I was beginning to wonder if the council had anything to do with that. It’s not like there was a reason to leave. Sea Haven was a happy place. I was one of the only people who knew it held dark secrets…
“And you’re leaving tonight?” Christina confirmed in disbelief, breaking me out of my thoughts.
I nodded. “But you know what? Now you two can be roommates.”
The room fell silent. They both shared a look like that was a good idea.
When Christina turned back to me, she spoke softly. “We’re really going to miss you.”
“I know.” I couldn’t hold it back any longer. The flood of tears hit once again, and then suddenly, my friends were by my side, hugging me and crying themselves.
It was like watching my own funeral.
Five
After helping me pack my suitcase, my friends said their final goodbyes. My heart broke as I led them out the front door and watched them disappear down the sidewalk.
I’d managed to fit as many keepsakes as I could in the suitcase. I’d made sure to pack all the photographs I could, including my baby book, the five framed photos of me with my family and friends that I’d placed around my room, and all of the pictures that hung from the bulletin board above my bed. I packed the collection of illustrated mermaid stories my grandmother had given me as a kid before she died. I even made sure to pack The Little Mermaid t-shirt Liana had given me last Christmas, even though I never wore it. From Christina, I packed the striped shell she’d once found on the beach for me.
There was just one more thing I couldn’t leave home without. I pulled the necklace from my jewelry box and held it up in front of my face. On the chain hung the smallest container with a cork on top. The vial was filled with a small amount of sand and a blue-green liquid that clearly wasn’t ocean water. My dad had picked it up from a tourist trap years ago on one of his trips down the coast.
I tugged at the cork. The darn thing didn’t budge. I tried again, but I quickly noticed that by twisting it, I was beginning to rip the cork apart. Thinking quickly, I threw open a drawer at my desk and pulled out the safety pin I knew would be there. I shoved the pin between the cork and the edge of the glass, working my way around it to separate the glue. Finally, the cork broke free.
I hurried to the bathroom and poured the not-ocean-water liquid down the drain. I didn’t care about tossing the sand down, too, since there wasn’t much of it. I quickly rinsed the vial to remove any last grains of sand and then dried it off.
Stepping out onto the back patio, I inhaled the scent of ocean air. It may be my last chance to enjoy the aroma of home. As a wave of tranquility washed over me, I took a step and then another and another until my feet hit wet sand. I bent and scooped a small amount of it into my vial. Nearby, a tiny shell caught my eye, and I threw that into the vial, too. Standing, I took another deep breath and walked until the ocean waves began lapping at my bare feet. As the next wave came in, I gathered just enough salt water in my vial to fill it the re
st of the way.
I held the vial in front of my face triumphantly. Carson Ray may be able to take me out of Sea Haven, but he could never take Sea Haven away from me.
I stalked back to my bedroom, where I placed a dab of glue back on the cork and pressed it into the top of the vial. Then I slung the chain around my neck and tucked it under my shirt for safe keeping. I eyed the mirror to make sure it wasn’t visible. It wasn’t, but when I caught a glimpse of my face, a frown formed across it. I hated myself. I turned from the mirror and fell down onto my bed next to the suitcase, burying my face into my pillow. How could I just be going along with this? Why wasn’t I fighting back? I thought I was stronger than this. Since when did I just blindly follow authority? Sure, I’d never been in detention or anything, but that didn’t mean I hadn’t deserved it a time or two.
I raised my head from the pillow, wiping away the hot tears that had formed in my eyes. I knew the reason I wasn’t fighting this. I was scared. In one night, my whole idea about the world I lived in was turned on its head. I didn’t know what other secrets lay out there or what might happen to me if I tried to uncover them.
“Bree,” my mom called from outside my room, making me jump.
I sat up straight in bed just as the door popped open a crack.
“How’s it going? Almost all packed?” She poked her head into the room.
I nodded, but I couldn’t keep that frown from returning to my face. “Almost.”
She stepped through the doorway and sat on the last sliver of bed available. I glanced at my suitcase next to me. I wanted to hide her in there and take her along with me. The plastic bag she held in her lap crinkled as she opened it.
“What’s that?” I asked.
She sighed. “I picked up a few things for you. I knew you couldn’t take too many liquids on the plane, so I bought you some travel sized shampoo and conditioner to hold you over until you can pick up more.” She pulled them from the bag and set them on top of the suitcase. “I thought you might like some other things for your dorm room, too. Here are some tacks for your bulletin board—if you get one in your dorm.” She set those aside as well but kept her eyes locked inside the bag, avoiding my gaze. “I also picked up some hand towels, a mini sewing kit, and a flash drive, just some things I thought you might need. You have enough notebooks and pencils, right? Because I didn’t get you any.”
