by Bella Grant
“Naomi,” Beau said, and she knew what was coming. “What happened earlier?”
“Don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I told you the name of the man who’s after you and you shut down,” he said. “Why? And don’t give me that bullshit about it being nothing.”
She frowned. She could say nothing to him that wouldn’t lead to more questions and blowing her cover. “I said I was fine, Beau, and I meant it.”
“Damn it, woman,” he yelled and threw the towel he’d been drying dishes with onto the counter. “Why won’t you admit something’s wrong? Do you think it’s your fault, is that it? Are you holding back so you feel guilty for what happened?”
It’s all my fault. I don’t have a choice. The thoughts raced through her mind as she braced herself against the counter and closed her eyes on the tears of anger filling them. If she didn’t tell him something, he would keep pressing.
“That name… Reminds me of a man I loved once upon a time. A fiancé,” she said, spitting the word out, hoping he’d buy the partial lie. “It just startled me is all, to hear it.”
“How badly did this man hurt you, Naomi? How long ago?”
That, at least, she could answer, and the words slipped from her mouth in a whisper. “Three years ago. Three goddamned years. Are you happy now?”
“No, I’m not happy,” he growled and stalked toward her but didn’t completely close the distance. His eyes glared with that predatory gleam again, but it wasn’t to possess her. She’d seen that look enough times in the mirror. That was the look of someone out for blood. “I asked before if he hit you and you never answered me, but your friend said he did something worse.”
Eddie cursed Jackie. Damn that woman and her big mouth. “It’s nothing I want to discuss, so just drop it. I’ll be fine. I always am.”
He reached slowly for her hand, and she forced herself not to move, but that didn’t stop her from flinching at the contact anyway. He reached for her other hand, and she flinched again, her thoughts on the fiancé. She cursed and apologized until his eyes flared in anger and he told her none of this was her fault. “Is he the reason you do that?”
Eddie chewed her bottom lip. “If you’re asking if he hurt me physically… I’m sorry. I just can’t, Beau.”
He frowned and pulled away from her, and his hands released hers. The last thing she wanted was to push him away, but if he started talking about her past, everything would come out and her cover would be shot to hell. “I want his full name.”
“I’m not telling you a damn thing until you promise me you won’t do something stupid.”
“Like what, exactly?”
“You work for the government. For all I know, you’ll track him down and take him out quietly.” Not that we aren’t currently trying to do that right now, anyway. “I don’t understand why this is such an interesting topic for you. I’m doing just fine. I can handle myself.”
“Sure you can. That’s why you still have nightmares and refuse to take your pain meds and are pissed off half the time.” Beau rumbled off the list. “Maybe you should stop acting like none of it happened and talk about it. It’s affecting you more than you think. You opened up last night. You can do it again—you need to, or you’ll never be able to move on.”
“Shut it, Beau.”
“No, because one of these days, you’re going to break down. Your life won’t be worth living, and eventually, the pain and the memories will consume you.”
“You’re treading on thin ice, Savage. I suggest you cease and desist,” she whispered menacingly. He had no idea how close to the truth he was. Her hand crept towards the cake Jackie baked on the counter. “What makes you so different from all the others, huh? The professional therapists? What makes you think I would talk to you about any of this?”
“Because, unlike those therapists, I actually care for you, and against my better judgment, I’m falling for you.” He glanced up and down her body and added, “Not to mention you trust me, whether you want to or not.”
She blanched. “Who said there would be a repeat?”
“You do, every time you look at me.”
His words touched and ticked her off at the same time, and too bad for him, the anger won out. Her hand was at the cake, its blue icing beautifully done, before she could stop herself.
“Have fun with this, Navy,” she grumbled, grabbed a handful of cake, and smashed it against his face. He stood there, stunned, as it fell from his face. He scrunched his eyes and wiped the rest of it away.
Naomi chuckled at him until he reached for the cake, too, and chucked some at her. She shrieked and tried to grab the plate, but he was too fast for her. He threw more pieces at her as she laughed and cursed him. When there was none left, he set the plate down and wrapped her in his arms, holding her somewhat loosely so as not to upset her. She flinched at first, but her body relaxed against his.
After a few minutes of laughing in each other’s arms, Beau set Eddie on her feet and grinned down at her, making her burst into laughter again. She was flushed, and it was from more than just anger at his meddling and dragging up her past yet again. He held her close, giving her the sense of security she’d missed in her life. He ran his hand through her sticky, cake- and icing-filled hair, making her smile even more.
“I should probably clean this up,” she said quietly, motioning to the mess they’d created in the kitchen.
“Is that really what you want right now?”
“I don’t know what I want,” she whispered. He’d opened her wounds before and begun to heal them, and as much as she hated his questioning, she wondered if his tough attitude was what she needed to finally put everything behind her.
He bent down and kissed her, licking the blue icing from her lips until she shook with need. “Naomi, tell me what you want before I lose it.”
The want in his words sent a shiver through her body as he straightened and met her gaze. She wanted to be loved by another man, wanted to get the images out of her mind of when her life hit bottom and she thought she’d never survive… Never thought she’d have another connection to a man again.
But here, now, was a man standing before her, willing to take on the challenge.
She stretched up on her toes and whispered his name. “Beau.”
It was all he needed to hear. He scooped her up in his arms and carried her upstairs to her room. He kicked her bedroom door closed, and she backed towards the bathroom as he set her on her feet.
“I think we could both use a shower,” she said and thought back to a time before the incident. Back when she still held hope of finding love and having a normal life, or as normal as she could for a spy.
With Beau’s eyes on her, she slid the straps of her tank top down her shoulders and moved her hands to her jeans. If she watched his eyes, she could get through this and get over everything. She trusted Beau, who had the strength in his body and his mind to take on a woman like her and not flinch as she did every time she looked in the damn mirror.
She stepped into the bathroom, and Beau followed, keeping his distance until she invited him closer. A flash of another man’s face charging at her froze her body, but her eyes found Beau’s again, the dark desire to be with her reflected in their depths. The next time the face appeared, she tore it away with the force of his gaze and her hands undid her jeans, sliding them down her hips so she could kick them off. She reached into the shower and turned the water on, letting it run to hot, and her hands returned to her top covered in smeared icing and cake.
Beau swallowed hard and moved forward a few steps, stopping short of reaching her. “Let me.”
Eddie waited for the rush of raw hatred and fear to burst to the surface as he moved towards her, but all she felt was the warmth of his hands and the trust in his eyes. She lowered her hands, and his replaced hers at the hem of her shirt. He nuzzled her neck, kissing the sensitive flesh near her ear as his hands pushed her tank up over he
r breasts then pulled back enough to lift it off over her head. She stood before him in her bra and panties and reached for his shirt next. He held up his hand to stop her so he could take his shoulder holster off first and set it aside, followed by his knife. When his gun was still in easy reach of the shower, he turned back to let her take his shirt off.
Her hooded eyes marveled at his bare body again. She reached for his jeans, and he let her unbutton them and slide the zipper down as he continued to kiss her shoulders and neck, nibbling her earlobe until her knees were weak. His arm wrapped around her waist to hold her up.
“I’ve got you,” he whispered in her ear. “I’ll always have you.”
Once, she’d believed a man when he said that, but this time, her heart fluttered and her stomach filled with butterflies. She felt it—deep in her bones—the truth of those words. She was supposed to be protecting him, and he was saving her life instead.
Steam filled the bathroom, and Eddie worked at his jeans, tugging them down over his hips and bringing his boxers with them. He helped her and stood before her in his full naked glory. The trail of hair she’d felt earlier stretched farther down, and her body warmed as her clit throbbed at the sight of him fully erect, a sight she thought would send her into a panic mode. Instead, she was desperate to feel him, all of him. He helped her with her bra, and she slid her panties down. She looked up, meeting his gaze, and wrapped her hands around him, squeezing just a little. He groaned and pulled her closer but stopped as if scared she would flinch. She didn’t, and his lips again covered hers.
Eddie’s hands moved down his length, reveling in the warmth and hardness of him as she backed towards the shower. He followed, and when they reached it, he lifted her up and over the small lip by her hips and stepped inside after her, pulling the curtain closed around them.
She stepped into the hot spray and let the water wash away not just the mess but her fears from the day and what the next few days might bring. He told her to turn around so he could get the icing out of her hair. She hesitated at the idea of having him behind her, but she did turn, forcing the old paranoia down, and let him work his hands through her hair. He massaged her scalp, and she closed her eyes, sighing at the sensation and relaxation flooding her body. He didn’t stop at her hair but reached for the body wash and loofah.
“What are you doing?” she whispered, her voice rough with need.
“You’re dirty,” he replied in her ear. “I’m going to help clean you. And then, if you want, you can have your way with me.”
He started at her shoulders, moving the loofah across her skin as his other hand followed behind, gliding down her wet skin. He moved from one shoulder to the other before doing her back. When his hand soaped her breasts, her nipples hardened instantly at his touch and the texture of his palm and loofah combined. He kissed her neck, and she leaned back against him. His erection pressed against her lower back spurred her desire.
“Beau…” She whispered his name, and his arms tightened around her.
“Stop?”
“No,” she pleaded. “Don’t stop.”
The loofah fell to the bottom of the tub as his soapy hands cupped her breasts and his kisses migrated from her neck to her shoulder and up to her ear. “What do you want, Naomi? Tell me.”
“You. I want all of you,” she breathed.
One of his hands slipped down between her legs and held her warm folds, wet from the water and her need for him. His palm rubbed against her clit in lazy circles as his fingers spread her lips. Eddie knew he wasn’t just opening her physically. Beau had started something with that first damn kiss of his, prying open her worst memories and exposing them to the harsh light of reality of what they’d done to her all these years.
“I want you to forget that man,” he whispered in her ear. “You’ll never remember him again after me. You’ll never hurt again because of him.”
She believed him. His words reverberated through her as his fingers slid inside her, filling and stretching her. It had been a long damn time, and she was tight. His fingers tugged at her nipple as those on his other hand delved inside her. She reached behind her and took his length in her grip, sliding up and down in the water until he grunted.
“Keep doing that, and this won’t last as long as I want it to,” he muttered.
“Maybe I want to feel you… all of you.”
“Not yet,” he said tightly. “Not until you let go.”
His hand pressed harder and moved faster as he removed her hand carefully from him and placed it on her own breast. His hand covered hers and helped her massage the flesh. She moaned as pressure built within her and a sharp burst of pleasure shot forth, making her cry out as her body shook in his hands. Before it could end, he turned her around and picked her up, wrapping her legs around his waist as he pressed her back against the wall. She gripped his shoulders as he held her and his tip pressed against her folds.
“Are you sure?”
She stared at him, felt the desire in his eyes and in his hands as he held her. “Never been surer in my life.”
He kissed her and thrust inside her, slowly at first, stretching her and letting her adjust to him. She slid down him easily, and when he thrust again, she pushed her hips forward, taking all of him in to the hilt. He groaned, and she sighed at the feeling of being filled once again. This was on her terms, though, and her body shuddered with wanton desire at the contact.
Beau moved his hips, and they quickly found a rhythm as the pressure built inside her again. The first time he’d brought her to the edge, she thought she’d let go of all she could, but as he groaned with her, feeling his swollen cock inside her, she knew his words were true. After this night, she would never think of another man again. This was what love was about, what being in a man’s arms was supposed to be—her body ready to explode with passion and desire.
Not writhing in pain after being tortured for days.
“God, Naomi,” he muttered, and the next second, he groaned. Eddie followed barely a second later, draping herself over him as her body let go and the orgasm ripped through her, body and soul.
But as the water continued to pour down around them and she stared into his eyes, she knew the night was far from over.
They cleaned up quickly, and she shut off the water. She tossed him a towel, and they dried, not speaking as the need to be in one another’s arms grew until she couldn’t stand it any longer and let her towel fall to the floor. This moment in time, when nothing scared her, she wanted to be with him… Before those nightmares crept back into her life. She wanted this time with Beau.
She held his face in her hands and kissed him fiercely, their tongues dancing and warring against each other as he groaned deep in his chest. He picked her up and carried her to the bed. As he laid her out and stared at her naked body, Eddie couldn’t take her eyes off of his and his erection, hard again so quickly. She held out her hand and he took it, letting her pull him down beside her.
“I’ve never wanted anyone more,” he whispered between kisses.
Eddie pressed him against her, moaning when her sensitive nipples brushed against his chest hairs, tickling them. Everything throbbed with need for him to touch her again, fill her again. “I don’t think I can stop.”
“Then don’t,” he whispered. “I won’t stop you.” He lifted himself to look down at her, and a devilish grin crossed his lips. “But I will taste you again—all of you.”
Beau slid down the length of her body as she ran her hands through his hair. The second his tongue licked her folds and clit, her hips bucked and her back arched. Her senses were on fire, and every touch pushed her one step closer to the edge of oblivion. His fingers thrust inside her as he sucked her clit hard, and her vision blurred at the short burst of pleasure with each pull of his mouth.
“Beau, I can’t take much more of this,” she bit out as another moan escaped her lips. “God, I want you.”
He removed his mouth, and she whimpered at the loss of contact
until he crawled up her body. His knee spread her legs apart so he could fit between them. “Still doing okay?”
She met his gaze and didn’t speak, bringing his lips down to hers as he thrust inside her. His tongue matched his hip’s movements, and her nails dug into his back, holding tighter with each deep plunge. Using what little strength remained in her bad leg and using her good leg more, Eddie managed to flip them over so he was on his back. With a wicked grin of her own, she straddled him, sinking all the way down to the hilt, and with his eyes locked on her body, she rode him hard, her need for control matching her need for him. His hands held her hips against him, each thrust deeper and harder than the last. When she couldn’t ride him any longer because of the pleasure exploding inside her, Beau moved for her, driving her even farther until she tumbled over the edge with Beau there to catch her.
They cried out as one, groaning as their sweat-slicked bodies came together on the bed and their chests heaved with the strain of trying to catch their breath.
“Well,” she gasped and looked over at him. “I’d say I’m making progress.”
He chuckled and pulled her into his arms, kissing her forehead. “I’d say that’s an understatement.”
“I think you cured me,” she told him. Her mind and soul seemed lighter than they had in years, free of the chains those horrid memories placed on her.
“I’ll agree with you when you can sleep through the night.”
She didn’t want to argue with him, but for her to do that would take more than forgetting about her fiancé. He was only part of the problem. They lay together for a while longer until she remembered the mess they’d left in the kitchen downstairs.
“I should go clean up our mess.” She groaned and sat up, but Beau leaned over and kissed her fiercely.
“Stay here and rest a while. I’ll take care of it.”
“All of it?”
“Why not? I’ll do another walk while I’m down there.” Something else glimmered in his eyes, but Naomi wasn’t sure what he was thinking. “Stay up here and get some sleep. Let someone else take care of you for once.”
