by A. J. Markam
I woke up in a graveyard in the dead of night, out in the middle of nowhere. The cemetery was maybe ten by ten feet in a vast ocean of grass, with a few scattered cairns made of piled rocks. I figured a nomadic tribe or some traveling settlers had buried their dead here and then moved on, because there were no towns or cities anywhere in sight beneath the starry sky.
What the hell?
Then I remembered what the bartender had said: that Orlo had destroyed every cemetery within miles and miles of his underground lair.
Had he missed this one because it was so tiny and remote?
Or maybe it actually was hundreds and hundreds of miles away…
That realization quickly led to terror.
“ALARIA!” I screamed, though no one was around to hear me.
I checked my action bar –
No, both she and Stig were still alive.
Hoping against hope, I checked Meera’s icon, praying that she had died so I could summon her to help me –
Shit. No such luck. She was alive and healthy, too.
I pulled up my map and saw I was in an uninhabited zone with nothing around for miles. The only thing on the map was the cross icon that symbolized the graveyard where I now stood. I zoomed out once, twice, five times before I saw the town of Maredo, where Alaria and I had been driven out at gunpoint.
It looked like I was at least an hour southeast of the town. Orlo’s compound had been 30 minutes east of that. I scrolled over and found it on the map: Gnome’s Hollow. The only problem was that, using simple geometry, if one side of the triangle was 60 minutes, and the second side of the triangle was 30 minutes, then the other side between them was… uh…
Screw it. I was horrible at geometry.
All I knew was that I had more than an hour’s ride before I could get back to Alaria.
“God DAMN him!” I roared as I summoned Balrog. I jumped onto the horse’s back and tore off in the direction of the town as fast as I could go.
The entire way there, I kept tabs on the action bar. Nothing was happening to either Stig or Alaria, so I took that for good news – but Orlo was too smart to kill them. He would know that I could summon them immediately wherever I was.
Whatever he had in store for them, it probably wasn’t good.
I made it to the fields above Orlo’s underground lair in miraculous time: just over an hour. The entire way I’d pushed Balrog as fast as he could go. By the time we stopped, he was drenched in sweat and wheezing with exertion. I dismissed him in a cloud of smoke, then tried to find the tunnel. There was only a sliver of a crescent moon, too dim to see much at all, so I had to pull out a torch from my bag and light it. Even then it took me another ten minutes to stumble across the entrance.
I crawled through the hole in the ground and continued through the tunnel until I got to the room with the thousands of holes in the walls, ceiling, and ground. I knew better than to simply try to race across it, so I cast my invisibility spell and gingerly stepped out onto the floor.
Rods immediately began shooting out from underfoot and from the sides of the walls.
I quickly stepped back onto ground with no holes. The rods immediately ceased moving, though the ones already out still stayed where they were.
God DAMN that gnome…
I didn’t know what to do, so I tried a little of everything.
First I cast a Darkbolt at the rods, but it had absolutely no effect. Same with Darkfire.
Then I tried my area of effect spell, Hellstorm. A swarm of little bat-winged demons appeared and rained down flaming sulfur on the room.
Nada.
I sent my All-Seeing Eye across to look for some kind of switch on the other side. Nothing.
What did Orlo say to make all the rods retract? Oh yeah –
I did my best imitation of Orlo’s Vizzini-like voice. “System reset!”
Nothing.
I tried Soul Suck on the rods. Nope.
Out of desperation, I called down my quartet of imps, just to see what would happen.
They appeared in a burst of fire and immediately set off across the room.
Metal poles shot out all around them from above, below, and both sides.
The imps scampered as fast they could through the tightening maze, but eventually they were pinned within hollows formed by the rods.
They chattered at me angrily like, What the hell did you get us into?
“Sorry, guys,” I said despondently.
Once time ran out, they disappeared in little puffs of flame, and I was left alone again.
I sighed and looked at the kaleidoscope of metal pickup sticks jutting every which way. I waited for them to retract, seeing as the imps were gone – but they didn’t. The rods stayed there, frozen in space.
I frowned.
Why aren’t they retracting?
Since there was nothing else left for me to do, I decided to try my luck again. Without going into invisibility, I walked over to an edge of the room that didn’t have any rods protruding, and placed my foot down on the floor.
Nothing happened.
What?!
I stepped a little further out into the empty part of the room, ready to jump back at a second’s notice –
Nothing happened.
Was it really that simple? Once the room had trapped something, it stopped? Like a mousetrap whose trigger has been flipped, it was now harmless until the owner reset it?
After all, it had caught the four imps. Maybe according to the room’s programming, it had neutralized the threat and was no longer recognizing new ones.
How could Orlo have been so stupid? I mean, it was a great trap if you weren’t expecting it – but if you were, then any group that was willing to sacrifice one member could get past it!
Then I remembered what Alaria had told me about Orlo’s weakness: He thinks he’s a lot smarter than he is.
Maybe Orlo had assumed that the room would trap everyone, and then he would come down and dispose of them. In his arrogance, he’d never considered that someone might make it out of the trap alive and return with full knowledge of how it worked, and thus have a chance to defeat it.
Of course, despite all my gloating, I wasn’t across the room yet.
I began to climb my way over, under, and around the rods. Almost two thirds of them had extended, and they formed a labyrinth that wound 20 feet above the ground like a jungle gym from hell. I had to climb, wiggle, and dangle my way through, only to hit a dead end where I couldn’t squeeze past. Then I had to retrace my path and find another route. It took me a good 30 minutes, but I finally touched down on the other side of the room.
Filled with new hope, I set off through the tunnel at a sprint. I passed zombie-like servant after servant, though none of them tried to stop me. They just kept shambling along their preprogrammed paths.
I finally got to the dining room. At first I had no idea where to go from there – but then I remembered what Soraiya had said (when we still somewhat trusted her).
Once you’re in the dining room, go down the hallway behind where Orlo sat. Then go right, then left, then right again.
Everything she’d told us had probably been a trap, which we had avoided by going to a different part of the compound. That explained why Orlo wasn’t waiting for us in the hangar filled with his war machines, and instead had to come to us.
But if it was a trap then, was it a trap now?
Or was it possible that Orlo thought he had destroyed all the graveyards far enough out that I wouldn’t be returning for hours?
And that even when I did return, I would be caught in his stripper pole trap?
Maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t be watching his back.
I didn’t really have any other options, so I crossed my fingers and darted down the hallway.
17
Within 30 seconds I heard the zzzzap zap! of electrical arcs and the gnome’s nasal voice.
“I would enslave you again if I could, my pretty, but your idiot master mucked that up when
he freed you. If I had a Collar of Gorbolik I could do it…”
The Collar of Gorbolik was a temporary collar that could be used to enslave anyone. I had purchased one back in Exardus to use on Meera so that she could follow me into the dungeon and never die.
(Although we’d also used it for… ahem, ‘other things’ in the privacy of the bedroom.)
Orlo continued to speak as I crept along the wall outside his laboratory.
“But there’s really no need. I know I’ll prefer you in your new form – and in time I’m sure you’ll come to thank me for it!”
What the hell was he talking about?
I peeked around the corner of the tunnel into a larger cave. It was a workshop, just like Soraiya had said. Metal towers with coils and wires covered every wall, and multicolored arcs of electricity sparked from one conduit to another.
Orlo sat on a padded seat atop a metal pole, which was connected at its base to a track along the ground. The pole moved along the track, shuttling him from one bank of controls to another, raising him up to read a gauge or lowering him down to throw a switch.
From the ceiling dangled a small cage with Stig trapped inside. He gripped the bars with his hands, and the look on his face was one of sheer terror.
I saw why when I followed his gaze.
Alaria was lying bound and gagged on a metal table, and her entire body was covered in detachable electrodes connected to wires. Next to her table sat a chamber eight feet long and three feet high, made of panes of translucent crystal separated by metal bands. It looked like a chrysalis, one for some giant mechanical butterfly.
And like a chrysalis, there was a dark shape within, though it did not move.
Soraiya leaned against a wall behind Orlo’s mechanical seat and watched the proceedings dispassionately.
As I tried to figure out what to do, Soraiya looked over and saw me.
I was expecting her to scream and start casting firebolts at me, so I immediately began to raise a spell –
But she surprised me and raised one finger to her lips. Shhhh.
I frowned and stopped my spellcasting.
She pointed at Orlo and mouthed frantically, Hurry!
Then she made a motion like she was plunging a knife into his back.
Kill him!
I despaired. No matter what I did, it wouldn’t be enough. As soon as I attacked Orlo he would send me back to the graveyard within seconds.
“Alright, my pretty little succubus,” Orlo cackled, “HERE WE GO!”
His stubby little hand reached out for a switch on the nearest electrical panel.
Okay – I no longer had a choice.
I threw a Darkbolt at him.
It was a pinprick to a giant, but it certainly got his attention. He howled in pain and rotated around on his chair like a doll on a Lazy Susan.
“Who dares – YOU?! Inconceivable!”
Man, the game designers really weren’t hiding their influences on this one.
“Boss!” Stig croaked joyfully from his cage.
“MRMM!” Alaria screamed from behind her gag.
“Oh no!” Soraiya cried in a pretty convincing voice, though instead of attacking me, she just slapped her hands to the side of her face like the kid in Home Alone.
I blasted Orlo with Soul Suck, but it barely took off half a percentage of his hit points.
He didn’t counterattack, though. He just grimaced through the pain and cackled when the attack was over.
“Fool! I could crush you like an insect, but this is even better! Now you shall see the folly of opposing against me – and it will be your beloved succubus who pays the price!”
He put his hand on the switch and slammed it down.
A bolt of electricity arced from one end of the room to the other, from a giant coil near the ceiling to an antenna at the head of Alaria’s table. The wires covering her body glowed and sparked like a spiderweb of static electricity charges, and she screamed in agony as every muscle in her body strained against her bonds.
“NOOOOOO!” I screamed.
I readied Self-Sacrifice to pump more Health into her –
Suddenly the electricity stopped and her body went limp.
At the same time, her picture on my action bar shifted colors to a metallic hue, like her icon had been carved in bas-relief out of silver. It wasn’t greyed out – it was completely transformed.
I couldn’t figure out what was happening until the top of the chrysalis opened up like a gullwing door and a cloud of white smoke boiled out. A voice that was definitely Alaria’s – but sounded like it was filtered through some music producer’s vocoder – spoke from inside.
“Ian?”
The smoke dissipated and someone sat up inside the chrysalis.
“Ian, I feel strange – and why do I sound this way?”
I stared in shock at what I saw.
Oh my God, no –
There was the sexbot Vara, her eyes shining yellow in her pretty metal face –
But Alaria’s voice was coming out of her mouth.
Alaria – Vara? – the robot saw from my expression that something was wrong, and then looked down at herself. There was a brief second of shocked silence –
And then she erupted in a bloodcurdling, digitized scream. “What have you DONE to me, you little BASTARD?!”
Orlo threw back his head and howled with laughter.
“I’ve done to you what I did to all my demons besides Soraiya: I have transplanted your soul into a robot!” Orlo looked over at me and leered. “You accidentally discovered my secret when you removed the mask from one of my servants. I would have preferred to orchestrate the reveal myself, but no matter! Now you see what you are dealing with: a genius the likes of which this world has never known!”
“Why?!” I asked in horror as I stared at Alaria’s new metal body. “Why would you DO that?!”
“Because I CAN!” Orlo cackled. “At least, that was the reason in the beginning. I doubled my workforce in short order – turning my demons’ bodies into mindless slaves, and giving hyper-intelligent awareness to machines! But then I realized there were other benefits to having a demon’s soul trapped inside a robot – particularly the ability to reason and make decisions on its own!
“The best part is, because the demon’s soul is bound to me by the collar I enslaved it with, the robot is bound to me as well! They must follow my commands! It’s two slaves for the price of one! And should the robot be destroyed, the soul automatically returns to its old body – at which point I can repeat the entire process all over again!”
THAT was interesting…
Orlo’s words sparked a plan in my mind. I lifted my hand to cast a Darkbolt at Alaria –
“Not so fast, my young fool!” Orlo shouted. “I know what you’re thinking, and you’re wrong! My demons’ souls will return to their bodies because of their collars. But your demon HAS no collar! If you destroy her robotic body, her soul will just float off into the ether, and you will never see your precious succubus again! But, by all means – go ahead and see if I’m lying!”
Shit.
There was no way for me to test what he’d said – not without potentially killing Alaria forever.
“Goddess-damned GNOME!” Alaria screamed, and thrust out her hand angrily.
The gesture was how she usually cast fireballs. Unfortunately, she was no longer a flesh-and-blood succubus, but a metal sexbot.
However, something odd happened.
A bolt of violet light shot out from her palm and blasted the wall behind Orlo, turning it into a cinder-filled hole.
The gnome jumped in his chair in alarm.
Alaria looked shocked, too, and glanced at her palm like she couldn’t believe it had just happened.
I heard Orlo mutter under his breath, “Probably shouldn’t have made her a combination bodyguard/concubine…” Then he recovered his jovial arrogance and cried out, “No matter! I leave you to your own worst imaginable fates: for you, human, a
life without your true love – and for you, succubus, a life encased in metal, divorced from your true body for all eternity! And now, if you’ll excuse me, I am due somewhere else! Come, Soraiya!”
He pushed a button on the arm console of his chair. A hidden door swung open in the panel of machinery behind him, and the chair raced along its track through the gap in the wall.
Soraiya gave me a reluctant look, but the diamonds on her collar glowed, and she flew after her master. As soon as she’d entered the passageway, the machinery folded back into place.
I could hear Orlo’s mocking laughter reverberating on the other side of the hidden door.
18
I ran over to the side of the chrysalis and put one hand on Alaria’s shoulder. It was unexpectedly warm, just like it had been when the robot was Vara, not Alaria.
The robot looked up at me with a terrified expression on its face. “Ian… what has he done to me?! WHAT HAS HE DONE TO ME?!”
And then she broke down crying.
“Babe, babe – it’s okay,” I whispered soothingly, gathering her up in my arms. I tried cradling her against my body, but everywhere I touched her – from her back to her shoulders to her hair – I was reminded that this was a robot made of metal.
No, it’s HER. It may not LOOK like her, but it is. Don’t forget that.
And for God’s sake, don’t let her know you were thinking it.
Alaria pushed me away, leapt out of the chrysalis, and stumbled over to the slab where her old body lay.
I followed and peered down at her outstretched form. For all intents and purposes, the flesh-and-blood body still seemed to be alive. The eyes were wide open, though glassy. Her chest moved up and down slowly as she breathed. Her skin was still warm, and when I put a hand on her chest, I could feel the heartbeat within.
But the body on the slab didn’t respond to touch. It just lay there, unresponsive.
Alaria stared at her own face and whispered, “What has he done to me?”
“Don’t worry, we’ll get you back in your body. We just have to go catch Orlo and force him to put you back.”
That snapped her out of her trance. She whipped around, grabbed my shirt, and pulled me right up next to her face. “Well go get him, then!”
