“Claire!”
The male voice scares the crap out of me, freezing my movement and making my heart stop for a couple of ticks.
“Jesus,” I turn, holding my hand over my chest as Nick walks toward me from just up the rocky shoreline.
“Did I scare you?” As he gets closer, I see that he’s not alone. Tyler is right behind him.
“I thought it was just me up here,” I say, my heart beginning to settle down.
“You couldn’t take the high school antics anymore, could you?” Nick is giving me that antisocial smile of his.
Tyler stands by, not saying anything, supporting a stack of driftwood in his arms, his eyes hidden by the bill of his hat.
“I just want it to be over,” I confess to both of them. “I can’t wait to go to Seattle.”
Nick smirks and then laughs. “Join Tyler and I for our anti-Basin Lake bonfire then. We couldn’t take all the idiots over there either.”
I pause for a moment, wanting to say yes but also unsure if Tyler really wants me here, and not altogether clear if Nick really does either. Then I point my thumb back down the shore. “I left McKenzie. I should probably get back.”
Tyler dumps the pile of wood on some sand and begins to stack it like a teepee. He doesn’t say a word to me.
“Suit yourself,” Nick says with a shrug.
After sighing, after considering that if I go back now Austin might still be sitting there, might have another line of innuendos to force on me, I decide to stay. “Actually, I guess I’ll hang out here if you guys don’t mind. You’re both kind of saving me from Austin,” I offer truthfully.
Tyler pauses in the building of the fire.
Nick makes a sneering sound. “That guy still trying to bug you?”
All I do is nod. I don’t really want to talk about it or bore them with the details.
“Can I help?” I ask instead.
“I think I’ve got it.” Tyler finally speaks, taking a quick look up at me.
“We could use more kindling,” Nick disagrees. “Maybe some dried up old branches… that kind of thing.”
“Sure. Be right back.” I walk into the sparse tree line a bit, enjoying the quiet of the night and the crackle of dry pine needles and twigs beneath my feet. It doesn’t take more than five minutes to gather enough to get a fire roaring, though my hands are dirty and a little sappy once I’ve delivered the stash.
“Thanks,” Tyler says and offers me the first smile of the night.
“What’s Denver like?” I ask him after I’ve cleaned my hands at the water’s edge, once the fire is really going and we’re all sitting against a really big log, the licking and snapping of the flames putting us all into a half trance.
“Bigger than this,” Tyler says quietly. “Me and my friends went downtown a lot to see movies and stuff, go to the arcade… just hang out… have fun.”
“You miss them?”
“Why would he miss them?” Nick muses. “He’s got me now.”
Tyler laughs, and it’s such a nice, genuine laugh, and I love it. “I kind of miss them, some of them.”
I wonder if he’s talking about the girlfriend, Laney. I wonder if he misses her.
“You said in chemistry you didn’t want to move, right?”
Tyler nods, but it’s like a noncommittal nod.
“It’s brave starting your senior year at a new school, let alone in a new town… and a new state.”
“Like I said, not much of a choice. But I’m actually okay with it. Really, I am.”
He’s serious when he says it, and it would be flattering to think he’s okay with it because he met me, and Nick of course, but it’s more like maybe he was trying to get away from something. My mind goes to that ex-girlfriend again, and I’m not quite sure why. I should be thinking about Kate and my prospects of getting into pre-med, not wondering about the things Tyler may or may not be telling us.
“Well, now all you’ve got to look forward to are bonfires and the occasional trek into Spokane,” Nick says. “Save for me… and maybe Claire… you would have been better off couch surfing in Denver.”
“Wow, thanks for including me, Nick,” I say, more amused than annoyed at him.
Tyler laughs, looks at Nick and says, “Let’s just agree Claire is the best thing about this town, okay?”
I’m not really prepared for that, but his sentiment brings me another ping of warmth. Before another word can be spoken, by Nick especially, I say, “Thank you for what you did the other day… for my sister.”
Looking at me again, Tyler lowers his chin and gives me a sort of half nod. “Yeah… she okay? She seemed pretty upset.”
“She will be.” I don’t want to dwell or slip up and say more about Kate than I should, so I leave it at that.
“Tyler’s got the makings of a hero,” Nick says, followed with a quick, “Oh, shit.”
“Oh, shit what?” I turn to his line of sight and see two figures coming toward us, but when they get closer I see that it’s just McKenzie and James.
I turn away, back to Tyler, and he’s already looking down at the sand.
TYLER
When Claire found us maybe ten or fifteen minutes after Nick and I left the main bonfire, I was taken temporarily mute. I wasn’t completely shocked to see her—she seems like the kind of girl who’d need a breather from whatever high school bullshit was happening at the main fire—but I was surprised that she wanted to hang out with us when she was clearly leaving her friends and that guy.
To top that off, she helped with gathering up some extra kindling without complaint, even though I didn’t want to make her do that. And once we were all sitting down and started to talk, I could feel myself begin to relax around her, wanting to hear about her life and consider even sharing more of my own.
But when her friends join us, McKenzie and James, it sets off the balance, and I feel like going right back into my shell again.
“I was starting to worry about you,” McKenzie, the best friend, says to Claire while I look at the fire.
“I’m sorry. I just had to get away from Austin. He doesn’t give up, and it’s so annoying.”
“Beyond annoying,” McKenzie agrees, then adds in a, “Hey, Nick… Tyler.”
“McKenzie… James…” Nick replies.
“Have you met my boyfriend?” It takes a second before I realize McKenzie is talking to me.
“Uh… no… not officially.” I get up and take a step toward the couple, putting my hand out. “Tyler.”
“Hey. Good to meet you,” James says. “We don’t get a lot of new guys here. You not playing this year?”
I tilt my head, unsure of what he means. Nick and Claire are standing up now too. Claire seems to get the confusion on my face.
“He’s talking about football,” she says, bunching her lips up and shaking her head. “Not everyone wants to risk life and limb for a stupid game,” she adds, speaking to James.
“It’s just that he’s built, and we could always use some good guys on the team.”
“You realize football leads to brain damage.” Nick says coolly.
“It also leads to scholarships and multi-million dollar contracts,” James shoots back. “You been watching Garrett Hevener at WSU? He’s their star player, easily gonna get picked up by the NFL. Mark my words. His family has that big farm just outside town.”
Nick scoffs. “And he’ll have a traumatic brain injury and early-onset dementia by the time he’s forty.”
Both guys are making good points, and I’d kind of like to cast my lot in with James here, let Nick know that if not for the attack, I’d be out on the field playing some kind of ball, whether it be football, baseball or basketball. I miss the camaraderie and the adrenaline that I’d only been able to experience as my younger self. But that’s not something I want to put on the table, and so I stay quiet, and I think maybe my silence is rewarded when Claire turns to me and we share a quiet laugh.
“Let’s go swimming,” McK
enzie says in a loud, authoritative way, seeming to want to put an end to this argument.
“I’m down for that,” James says.
“It is still warm enough out,” Claire agrees.
This is where my interest in seeing her in nothing but a bikini collides with my need to remain clothed. I expect Nick to sit this one out too because he’s scrawnier than James and possibly slightly body dysphoric—one of those terms I picked up in the few counseling sessions I’d been required to attend in my life—but what instead happens is that Nick enthusiastically agrees.
“Sure, let’s do it,” he says, already peeling his hoodie and then his shirt off.
And then all of them are doing it, getting half naked, McKenzie keeping her shorts on but wearing a bikini top, James whipping his shirt off and staying in his board shorts. Nick and James are already walking toward the shore while Claire slips her sundress off, revealing a black bikini top and squared off matching bottoms.
I feel my Adam’s apple bobbing up and down my throat as I swallow hard. Claire was beautiful clothed, but I hadn’t been quite ready to see her like this. She’s the kind of girl that isn’t too short or too tall, not too curvy or too angular, basically just right, and her skin is pretty much flawless.
“Are you coming in?” she asks me, folding her sundress up and setting it on a pair of flats she’d walked over here in.
“Uh… not sure I’ve got the appropriate attire,” I say nervously, looking down at my button-up shirt and cargo shorts before pulling the bill of my hat a little lower over my eyes.
“Just swim in your underwear,” McKenzie says, still hanging close to Claire. “We do it all the time.”
“Nah… that’s okay.” I try to wave them off, figuring it’s better if they just head out and have fun the way Nick and James seem to be doing, splashing at one another like two old friends.
“Okay, well come on, Claire. Let’s see if we can dunk Nick!”
Claire laughs softly. “Stay close to the shore—you’ve been drinking.”
McKenzie pauses. “You aren’t coming?”
“I’ll sit this one out.”
McKenzie gives Claire what I think is a conspiratorial look, and then she’s off and into the water.
“Don’t stay on account of me.” I don’t want to be the reason she loses out on the fun. “But… you know… it’s cool if you want to.”
“I want to,” she says clearly, offering a slight smile before she sits next to me, pulling her legs up and wrapping her arms around her knees. “I figure I can pick your brain a little since you really don’t say a whole lot in chemistry.”
There’s something like a hum with her body so close to mine, and I long to inch closer to her, long to feel the touch of someone. I miss that. “I hope you don’t think I’ve been rude or anything. I just keep to myself sometimes.”
“You and Nick get along though,” she says, loosening up her arms and stretching the soles of her feet toward the fire. “He must really like you because he doesn’t like to give the rest of us the time of day.”
“I’ve noticed,” the thought making me chuckle, “but he seems to be having fun now.”
“Probably because nobody else can see him with us. I think he likes being the outsider.”
“I’m not sure anybody really likes being an outsider.” Even when I was surrounded by friends back home, I’d still felt like one, the only one who was different.
She turns to me, her blue eyes lit up by the fire. “You have kind of a mysterious side, don’t you?”
“Not really,” I begin, eager to dispel that theory. “But what about you? You got something going on with that Austin guy?” She’d all but confirmed we were saving her from him earlier, but it’s one way of getting off the topic of my mysterious side. Plus I wouldn’t mind the confirmation.
Her smile dissipates. “You really want to know?”
“Sure… uh… I mean, just curious what’s going on with that?”
God, I’m an idiot. Regardless of taking the heat off myself, this is probably about the last thing she wants to talk about.
She shrugs, part of her smile returning. “No idea. There’s not any interest from my end though. I think he and I have already proven we aren’t good couple material.”
“But he doesn’t agree?”
She gives me a suspicious look. “Why don’t we talk about you and your ex? I really don’t want to keep talking about mine.”
“Oh, I don’t think so.” I ease away from that discussion with another quick laugh that is more nerves than anything before I look away from Claire and toward Nick, McKenzie and James just off shore.
She’s quiet, and the sounds of her friends laughing and the popping and snapping of the fire take over.
“You still love her,” she finally says. “I think I can tell.”
I shake my head and risk a glance at her. “How could you know that?”
“Because I have an older sister who tried to deny she loved someone when she really did. It’s easy to spot… or maybe I’m just guessing with you.” Another sweet, soft laugh. “But if you still love this Laney, you should tell her. You should make an effort to reunite once you guys graduate.”
I’m overcome with a strange sensation, a feeling of being let down that Claire is pushing me toward another girl and an equal feeling of hope, wondering if Laney and I do have another chance. Maybe I’d get over the hurt, and she’d decide I was enough for her by the time we were ready to move on to college.
“Tyler?” She nudges me with her smooth shoulder.
“I don’t know. I’m not sure she’d want that.”
Claire’s smile is comforting, and beyond that, it’s easy to see she’s really listening, seems to care about what I’m saying for some reason and maybe is even trying to offer me some decent advice.
“You’ll never know if you don’t try. You seem like a nice guy, Tyler, and if she’s what’s making you sad, then you’ve got to figure it out.”
“But I’m not sad.” I shake my head. Of course I’m sad. I’m pitiful, and I think that’s what Claire must see in me.
Instead of a nudge, she now touches my shoulder with her slender fingers, and I’m tempted to reach out to her too.
“Just think about it. Only you know what you feel inside, but I’m just saying… well, anyway, I think I might run in for a few minutes. Are you sure you don’t want to join us?”
“Nah, I’m okay here by the fire.”
“Okay, then,” she says, jumping up and offering me a friendly glance before she makes a run for the water.
I sit and watch, thinking about what she said about Laney. Eventually, I pull my phone out and check her Instagram, full of pictures of her and her friends, even me if you go back far enough. There aren’t any new guys, not yet, and thankfully none of Heath—that fucker. He really did deserve what he got, even if it messed my life up too.
Taking my cap off, I drag my hands through my hair and over my face, my thoughts of Laney reminding me of everything bad about our breakup, not the jump I’d wanted to make from thinking about something good—the fact that I’d loved her and might still love her—to reliving one of the worst days in my life when we broke up and I’d done the whole Jekyll and Hyde thing.
Lifting my head back up, I decide to focus on Claire instead, focus on her beautiful form and the memory of something sweet, something kind, her seeming to care about me, a guy she doesn’t even know. I’m not sure she’s right about Laney giving us another go. While she still talks to me, albeit only via text or email, I’m not sure that’s enough to build a future on. It’s also not enough for me to know what Laney really feels about me now or if it’s close to what I still feel for her. Maybe, in her heart, she’s let us go, not wanting to be the idiot I sometimes feel like for hanging on.
I’d be an even bigger fool to try something with Claire, to follow the interest I’m developing in her. It wouldn’t be fair because of what I still feel for Laney, not to mention th
e fact that a girl like Claire deserves a guy who isn’t fractured, definitely not me. Besides, I’m not ready to be rejected again—I don’t even want to think about the dark hole that would take me to.
But next to the fire and the soft waves of the lake rippling onto shore, it seems okay to dream a little, as long as dreaming is as far as it goes.
CLAIRE
Out in the water, I find myself wishing Tyler was with us, partly because I kind of like him and partly because he looks so sad sitting alone in front of the fire, fully clothed while the rest of us are half naked and swimming around like fishes in the water. McKenzie climbs up on James’ shoulders, and then they dare me to climb up onto Nick’s. When Nick agrees, I’m sort of shocked and continue to be amazed while he holds me very steadily as I spar with McKenzie and knock her off balance. She used to always beat me at that, even when it was Austin’s shoulders I was on, but Nick has a great foundation that wins out against the twenty or thirty pounds James has on him.
When McKenzie goes down for the third time, she gives up, and we all go to shore. Tyler is standing, his arms crossed and facing west to the far, dark end of the lake that stretches beyond us. He’s looking up at the sky, maybe at the stars that are coming out, and I have an urge to go stand next to him and see if I’d be able to point out any constellations. But not wanting to push or invade his space, I remain with everyone else, drying off by the heat of the fire.
Eventually Nick has had enough of us “townies” and puts his shirt back on. Then he calls for Tyler, twice before Tyler responds, like he’s being pulled out of some really deep thinking. He walks toward us, and I smile at him. He offers one back, but it’s not very big or wide, and I’m almost sure he’s sad. There is a pang of guilt in my belly, hoping I didn’t set something off by mentioning Laney—then again, he’d been the first to mention exes.
Between the Girls (The Basin Lake Series Book 3) Page 8
