He sat down on one of the bar stools and watched her steadily while she cracked eggs into a j bowl and grated cheese for an omelette. All the time she worked, she was conscious of his eyes. Why was he here? About the divorce, of course, but why had he found a personal visit necessary?
After the harsh words they’d exchanged, she would have thought he’d never want to see her again. She looked up and something about his watchful face made her say, ‘You look like you didn’t get much sleep last night?’
‘I haven’t got much sleep for three days. Aren’t you going to eat anything?’
‘I’m not hungry,’
‘Am I taking all your food, Josey?’ He smiled slightly.
‘As a matter of fact, you are,’ she said coolly. ‘But I owe you a meal or two.’
She slid the omelette, bouffant and golden, on to the waiting plate, then added toast and coffee. He didn’t talk while he was eating, but she saw his was enjoying his food. Finally, he pushed his plate back.
‘Do you like this little house?’
She answered vaguely, ‘It’s very nice but the rent is rather high.
Heywood reduced it for me, but of course, I wouldn’t want to take advantage of his generosity for long.’
He nodded, then rose and carried his dishes to the sink where she was scrubbing the omelette pan for the third time. She looked at him nervously.
‘I guess you are here about the divorce?’ she blurted out the words she hadn’t intended to say first. ‘I was going to write to you as soon as I got a permanent address …’
He leaned forward and put his finger on her lips. He was smiling, his eyes glinting with that look that had the power to make her knees weak.
‘Why did you come, Thorne?’ she mumbled around his finger.
‘I came to take you back with me.’ When she merely stared at him, he added, ‘To live with me. To be my love, my partner, my wife—all of those things we merely played at before. To make a real marriage.’
She drew a long, shuddering breath. Now that the time had come to confess, she found herself quite calm. ‘That’s impossible,’ she said almost matter-of-factly. ‘If you knew the truth about me, you’d want a divorce.’
‘Josey, darling.’ With gentle hands, he drew her away from the sink and into his arms, where he held her quietly. She stood stiffly, breathing in the familiar masculine odour of his skin, letting the comforting warmth of his body relax her slightly. ‘There is nothing, absolutely nothing, Josey Macallan, that you could tell me about yourself that would make me want a divorce— except that you didn’t love me anymore, and even then, I would still want you.’
‘Don’t say that,’ she said brokenly. ‘Please don’t say that. I am—I must file f-for a divorce.’
‘Come and tell me about it,’ he said comfortably, leading her into the living room and putting her into the big armchair. He kicked the footstool beside the chair and sat down on it, his long legs folding themselves under it. He took her hand. ‘Tell me.’
‘I am wanted for parole violation,’ she said bluntly, not looking at him.
‘Why?’ Just that one word, but something unsurprised about it made Josey look at him. He was watching her calmly.
‘I am a felon—an ex-convict. I—was Tony Leyden’s partner when he was convicted of theft. You were his defence attorney.’ She kept her eyes on him desperately as the words poured out, waiting for the look of disgust, the inevitable change of expression. ‘Those things you said about me in court weren’t true—maybe some of them were—but I hadn’t known about the money. Tony asked me to keep a box of mementoes for him. But he did spend money on me and he did lend me money to pay my rent,’ she added painfully. ‘My lawyer said it was no use—it would be much easier on me to plead guilty and let the judge suspend sentence.’ His face changed to a look of raw fury and she stopped, frightened.
‘Go on,’ he said in a controlled voice. ‘I thought you were going to defend me when you started talking to the judge. Funny, isn’t it?.’- she asked bitterly. ‘You were Tony’s lawyer but I thought you were going to defend me.
He was squeezing her hand so tightly that it had whitened from the pressure. His face was like a teak carving, hard, cold and implacable.
‘Go on, finish it,’ he muttered between set lips.
‘That’s why I screamed at you,’ she whispered tiredly. ‘I felt—betrayed.’
‘You were betrayed.’ His voice was filled with the bitterness of self-condemnation, but his eyes were naked with pain. ‘By the system, by all of us. Tony, who lied, and your lawyer, who was too lazy and incompetent to represent you properly. And I was the worst of all, because I was so biased and gullible that I swallowed every one of Tony’s lies without question. And the Judge, who didn’t even bother to look beyond my distorted version to see you as something besides the treacherous little tramp I had portrayed—as an innocent and badly frightened young girl, who hadn’t been given a chance to defend herself.’
‘You sound as though you already know about me,’ she whispered almost disbelievingly.
He smiled wryly. ‘My dear, I’ve known who you really were since the week before I married you.’
Her eyes opened wide, startled. ‘You mean—all that time I was going through agony, worrying about it, and you knew! How could you?’
‘Egotism,’ he said cynically. ‘You were right— I do have it. I wanted you to trust me enough to tell me of your own accord.’ His twisted smile held a hint of self-derision.
‘You—you bastard!’ she hissed. ‘You put me through all that torment—and you knew all the time!’
‘Yes. It somehow became an obsession with me. If you loved me, you’d trust me enough to tell me the truth, and if you didn’t, it meant you didn’t love me. It was as simple as that.’ He smiled without humour , watching her with a merciless intensity that somehow frightened her. She stilled, suddenly very wary, knowing that the reply she made would be very important. ‘I didn’t tell you because I thought I would lose you,’ she said hesitantly.
He blinked. He hadn’t expected that. ‘Lose me? He frowned.
‘If you learned who I was, the woman you’d despised in court, I thought you’d throw me out. You thought I betrayed Tony, that I was greedy, covetous … I knew you wouldn’t want to be married to a woman like that.’
He stared at her blankly, transfixed with horror. ‘My God,’ he breathed. ‘That never occurred to me. I have known the truth about you for so long, it didn’t occur to me you’d still think …’ He stopped, shaking his head dumbly. ‘I’ve known for years that you were innocent.
When you ranted about me being a bad lawyer, I was angry, of course, but later, when I learned who you were, I knew you were justified. I was a bad lawyer. But it didn’t occur to me you would assume I still felt the same way about you.’
‘You mean you wouldn’t have thrown me out?’ Somehow, that seemed the most important thing Josey had heard yet.
He knelt beside her chair, holding her hand to his cheek. ‘My darling,’ he said simply, ‘I would never “throw you out”. You’ve been the sum total of my existence almost since that first day on the beach. The way I treated you after that,’ he added dryly, ‘was a form of self-protection because you’d become so important to me. I can’t live without you. I’m not even a whole man when I’m away from you. It’s as though I’ve lost a vital part of my body and I walk around in pain, unable to function. I need you to live.’ His face was almost unrecognisable. His pallor had reduced his tan to a muddy-yellow. His mouth was a taut grimace of pain—his eyes starkly pleading. There was a look of uncertainty about him that Josey had never seen before. He looked—almost—afraid.
Thorne frightened? She put out her hand tentatively and touched his cheek, and he turned his face into it and kissed her palm. It was the gesture of a penitent, and Josey had never associated repentance or even fear with Thorne before. She felt a surge of tenderness.
‘Thorne?’ she whispered. ‘I feel the same
way about you.’
He kissed her softly, his lips tender and gentle on her mouth, her eyelids, her cheeks, the edges of her lips. Her confidence was returning, and she ran her hands daringly inside his shirt.
‘No.’ He put her from him firmly. ‘If, by some miracle, you’re prepared to forgive me, I want to get the explanations over with now.’
‘You don’t have to explain anything,’ she said demurely.
‘Yes, I do. Josey, I’ve known since a few months after you were released from prison that you were innocent. Tony told me,’ he added in answer to her puzzled look. ‘He was working for Stephen Vinelli, and he opened his safe and stole some money. In his confession, which Stephen and I had him write and sign, he admitted that he framed you that other time. Stephen and I were appalled at what we’d done to you and I tried to find you through your parole officer so we could make amends.’ His glance at her was questioning.
Haltingly, she explained what had happened and watched his face set ominously. ‘Is see.’ Grimly, he added, ‘I went after your lawyer then, and gave the fool a lesson in law he’ll never forget. Josey,’ he added swiftly, ‘you were cleared of all charges on the court books five years ago. In the eyes of the law, you’re innocent.’
So it had all been for nothing! The running; the changing of her name; the five years with John when she’d literally hidden from the world behind closed doors—it had all been unnecessary! But somehow, that fact—the wasted years— weren’t so important as that it had been Thorne who had done it, who had realised his mistake and made retribution; then waited patiently for an opportunity to tell her.
‘I didn’t know,’ she whispered. Her face was wet with tears and he lifted a long, lean finger and wiped them away from her cheeks.
‘How could you?’ he asked slowly. ‘I was afraid to tell you because I knew you had good reason to hate me.’
‘No, not hate.’ She smiled shakily. ‘We were both fools. I thought I married you for revenge then realised on our honeymoon that I loved you.’
He drew a deep breath, his eyes blazing with leaping lights. There was a suppressed note of exultation in his voice as he replied, ‘Neither of us could understand our emotions. I couldn’t be around you for five minutes without going into a tailspin—you had me coming and going. I started out by hating you and wanting to make love to you at the same time.’ He grinned faintly. ‘I told myself it would be easy when you responded so positively—but I was by no means as confident of my technique as I pretended. I wasn’t even sure if you really disliked me or were merely provocative.
‘And then you went away, leaving me to mend my shattered defences with Brian’s help.’
He grimaced. ‘That— puppy! Do you have any idea what you did to me when you said he’d had you that night I waited up late? I nearly went insane! My sweet innocent, don’t you recognise raw sexual jealousy when you see it?’ He laughed harshly. ‘God knows, I’ve demonstrated enough of it since we’ve been married! I was so utterly unsure of you. The night I stormed in on your date, I’d just learned who you were and I was desperate. I knew you despised me. The best I could hope for was to get you into my bed, then perhaps I could make you fall in love with me—eventually. When you mentioned marriage, I sat there stunned, unable to believe my luck, searching for flaws in your words. I knew you didn’t love me but I thought if I could keep you wanting me, our marriage had a chance.’
She flushed. ‘I did try to back out,’ she muttered defensively.
‘That you did! But I wouldn’t let you, would I?’ He laughed joyously.
I ‘You thought I married you for your money, didn’t you?’
‘Not exactly money—I knew you better than that by then. But the things I could give you, the lifestyle, all of that, yes. It was better than believing you hated me so much, you married me for revenge. So I used it all—money, sex—-to keep you, until you levelled with me. You had to be the one to tell me—I wouldn’t settle for anything less. So I kept on testing you, picking quarrels, making love … God, at times the only thing that kept me sane was your sexual response! Yet I hated that, too, when I thought that was all you wanted from me.’
Josey could understand that. She had felt the same way. ‘How did you learn who I was?’
‘I put my staff on it when I returned to Atlanta with Eve. When they hadn’t made any progress by the time I finished with the court case in Charleston, I returned and went through the files myself.’ He smiled slightly. ‘When the computer threw up Tony Leyden’s name, I remembered.’ He looked at her painfully. ‘My darling, if I live to be a hundred—a thousand!—I’ll never make it up to you for what I did.’
‘No, Thorne—it wasn’t altogether your fault…’
‘No excuses!’ He said harshly. ‘I was blindly prejudiced. I thought I knew people—what made them tick—their motivations. I knew nothing!’ He added remotely, ‘When I realised what I had done to you, I joined my father’s firm, which specialises in civil cases, big business accounts— that sort of thing. I no longer felt competent to defend cases in criminal court.’
‘Thorne!’ Josey was appalled. ‘It wasn’t all your fault! Your mother—a-and f-father …!’
The pale grey eyes warmed at her stammered words of sympathy. ‘Yes, Josey, my parents may have contributed, but I did it to myself, my darling. And I didn’t learn my lesson. I did it a second time when I jumped to conclusions about your place in Maud’s life. I need you in my life, my dearest heart,’ he added thickly. ‘I need you for my eyes and ears—to help me see people as they really are. To help me when my cynicism threatens to blind my viewpoint.’
‘Like Elaine and Ralph.’ She smiled at him teasingly.
‘Yes, even Ralph,’ he agreed drily. ‘Irritating but harmless—and certainly not to be taken seriously. Yet I made that evening miserable for you with my jealousy.’
‘Zoe Vinelli did her share,’ she said drily, then remembered. Her cheeks whitened. ‘Thorne, I’d forgotten! Tony …’
‘Are you speaking of his threats to take your story to the scandal sheets?’ he asked her calmly, pulling her into his arms. She started. ‘You know?’
‘I know,’ he said gravely. ‘And have successfully spiked his sordid little blackmail plot—with Stephen’s help.’ ‘How?’ she asked fearfully. ‘With the written confession he signed after robbing Stephen. It can earn him a second prison term if we care to pursue it. And this time, he’ll get no leniency. I assure you,’ he added, with a narrowed smile. ‘Tony saw the light after it had been pointed out to him. Stephen is in no mood to compromise this time—especially when he learned that Tony and his wife were having an affair. It was her jealousy of you that prompted her to make trouble by informing me. Of course, she never dreamed Tony would get caught in the backlash.’
‘But she must know about me!’ Josey licked dry lips. ‘And she’ll tell Eve Sanders and . ..’
‘No.’ His face flared with a raw anger that threatened retribution for Zoe. ‘She won’t talk. Not if she knows what’s good for her. Her life of luxury depends on Stephen’s continued generosity, and he has had his eyes opened. However, just to nullify your fears, I suggest we start telling our friends about your prison experience and the villainous part I played in it.
As a romance, it will make the cocktail circuit. We’ll probably be able to dine out on it for some time.’ His mouth quirked. ‘Haven’t you learned from Maud that the more outrageous a story is, the more acceptable it becomes? We’re sure to be a nine-days’ wonder, then something will come along to take our place.’
He slipped in beside her and pulled her into his lap. ‘Stop worrying, my beauty, we’re over the worst. From now on, everything’s going to be coming up roses.’ For long moments they rested there, arms tightly around each other. Josey felt at peace for the first time since that fateful Sunday afternoon when the police brought her the news of her parents’ death. He rested his head against her bright hair, and she felt a deep thankfulness that she had come full circl
e to this point. Oh, there would be more bumps in the future—braving the curious eyes would be one— but with Thorne beside her, she couldn’t count them as any more substantial than air puffs in the wind.
‘Do you think you’ll ever forgive me for what I did to you?’ Thorne’s voice was muffled against her hair.
She looked up, shocked that he could still be wondering about that.
‘Darling, I forgot it long ago! Besides, if it hadn’t happened the way it did, we wouldn’t have met and be here now, like this.’
He smiled slightly, but his eyes were shadowed. ‘I don’t deserve that you should forgive me, but I thank God for your generosity. I love you, Josey, and I will never knowingly make you unhappy again. I’ll make it up to you, I promise you that.’
‘Don’t try to spoil me!’ she scolded. It’ll become impossible—and you’ve already called me a shrew!’
He smiled. ‘Very well, I won’t spoil you if you’ll love me.’ He rose with her in his arms and started striding towards the bedroom.
‘You act like a man who knows just where he’s going,’ she commented blandly.
‘I told you I was alone here for at least two hours. Plenty of time to discover the bed and establish squatters’ rights. I was determined I was staying the night—either in the bed with you or out there in that armchair.’
His suitcase was laying open on the bed and he swept it off then ripped back the patchwork coverlet and blankets, all in one swift movement. Then, he turned to her.
But she was already removing his shirt, her hands sliding smoothly , over the hardening muscles of his shoulders. Her eyes were shining with a demure mischief that delighted him. The discovery of his love had restored her self-confidence and shown her in a new light—as the kind of woman she should be, one who was aware of her powers because she knew she was loved. For a long moment, he watched her, his eyes observing the smiling eyes; the dimple playing at the corner of her lips; the faint hint of fugitive colour on her cheekbones as she unbuckled his belt. He placed his trembling hand over her fingers.
Lady With A Past Page 15
