by Jessie Cooke
Jagger, the singer and guitar player, took a break on stage and got into the cage to spar and Sabrina found herself sitting between Smoke and Ash while they waited for the match to begin. As usual, Smoke was quiet, but Ash at least attempted conversation.
“You live in Florida, huh?”
“Yes, close to Orlando.”
“It’s nice there,” he said.
“Are you from Florida?”
“Nope. I was actually born and bred in New York.”
“Oh wow, how did you end up in California?”
Ash turned and pointed at one of the guys standing on guard near the door. Sabrina had seen the other guy a few times around the club, but she’d never been introduced to him. He was the kind of man that could intimidate most anyone with just a glance. His biceps were bigger around than her thighs and looked as solid as a rock. His t-shirt and even his vest stretched tight across his chest and his legs looked like long, tall tree-trunks. “That’s my buddy Sledge over there. We grew up together in New York, but Sledge moved out here to California after we got out of high school. We stayed in touch, though, and when I was going through a hard time for a bit Sledge told me I should come out here and take a little vacation from it all. I came out for a visit and never left.”
“You don’t miss New York?”
“Sometimes. I used to work on Wall Street...” Sabrina laughed, and Ash gave her a mock-wounded look. “You don’t think I look like a guy that could work on Wall Street?”
“No! It’s not that...it’s just...” Her eyes went to the “Enforcer” patch on his vest and he chuckled.
“It’s cool. I’m just giving you a hard time. It’s completely understandable that no one would believe a person would go from being a Wall Street mogul to part of an MC...especially as an enforcer. It’s kind of a long story, but the gist of it is that I was in love, she dumped me, I got depressed and realized I hated my life. I came out here and fell in love with these guys. I know they all seem crusty around the edges, but these guys are the best friends that anyone could ever have. They would literally take a bullet for me. I never had anyone in my life that cared that much about me before. I had friends, a lot of them, as a matter of fact...and family, of course. But the sad fact was that it was all superficial, even my family. People who have never really had to work or fight for anything don’t know how to appreciate anything, you know?”
Sabrina nodded. “Yeah, I do know that.” She thought about Devin. He’d been born rich and smart. He never struggled for anything, not even his good grades in school. He and Sabrina had gone out a few times and suddenly they were a couple, and he never really did anything to make that work either. As soon as things weren’t going well, he called it quits...like she wasn’t worth fighting for. But Ash made her wonder if it wasn’t that she wasn’t worth fighting for, but instead that he didn’t know how to fight for what he wanted since things had always just fallen into his lap. It was beginning to seem to her that people who were passionate about getting what they wanted in life had more character than those who didn’t.
“So anyway, that was five years ago. Sledge is still my best friend, but I love all of these guys.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“I love my brother, and respect him...but what makes him so all-powerful to you guys? I mean, why would a grown man give another grown man as much power over his life as you guys give Wolf?”
Ash made a face, like he was thinking of how to answer that. Before he could, from the other side of her, Smoke said:
“Respect.” They both looked at him but he was still staring at the match in front of him. Jagger was kicking the butt of the guy that he was in the cage with, and Smoke looked completely engrossed. She looked back toward Ash and he was smiling at his friend. He looked at her and said:
“Like the man of many words there said, respect is a huge part of it. You know, Wolf didn’t become president simply because he was Coyote’s son. He was elected because he is smart, and he’s got these amazing ideas about where this club is going in the future. He honestly loves this club and everyone that’s a part of it. We trust him, not just with our futures but with our lives. I’ve only been a part of the club for five years, but some of the old-timers have been around for twenty or more and if you talked to any one of them...and I did, before I made the decision to join up...they can’t think of a bad word to say about your brother. I know it’s a hard lifestyle to understand sometimes. From the outside, looking in, it looks like chaos...anarchy even. We live outside of the fringes of society and the law, but the truth is that this club is really about structure and discipline, it’s just our own variety. We party, a lot. We do things that feel good, that other people might look down on us for, but at the end of the day every decision that’s made in that meeting room...or just in Wolf’s head...is made in the best interest of everyone in this club.
“It’s like being a part of a big, extended family, always having someone to look out for and someone to look out for you. It’s figuring out that sometimes family is about a lot more than blood. When I came out to visit Sledge and decided to stay out here and prospect for the club, my own family...my blood...couldn’t understand it. They thought that I’d lost my damned mind. But since then, a few of them, at least, have come around to realizing that if I hadn’t left when I did, I’d probably be dead by now.”
When Sabrina was a kid she remembered Coyote saying almost the same thing one time during one of his quickie visits with her. She was beginning to realize that many of the guys looked at the club as their lifeline...and therefore to Wolf as their savior. She still wasn’t sure if that was good, or healthy, or not...but she was at least beginning to realize she didn’t know enough about it to judge. After all, when things weren’t going so great in her own life...twice now...she’d turned to the club, and even now with her heart aching over Bruf, and so many questions about the lifestyle, deep down she still felt more comfortable with the people in the club than she did surrounded by the ones in Florida who all seemed to be so obsessed with their own best interests that hers was an afterthought – except her mother of course. Sabrina’s mom had always been there for her. She’d spent a lot of years upset and angry with her mother. She’d blamed her for not having a father in her life and then when she found out who her father was, she blamed her mother for making bad choices. Sabrina thought about how she felt about Bruf...and she wondered if that was how her mother had felt about Coyote. Maybe it was time she stopped thinking so much about herself too.
It was after midnight and the party didn’t seem to be winding down much. Some more of the fighters from Vegas had just flown in and it actually seemed to be picking up speed. Sabrina was tired by that time and ready to call it a night. Wolf wouldn’t let her call an Uber for a ride home. He had one of the prospects give her a ride in the SUV instead. It was a short drive to Blair’s little house, and the kid that was driving her was friendly and talkative. She found out that he had been assigned as the designated driver for the visiting fighters and he seemed proud of his job. She was laughing at something he was saying when he pulled up to the curb in front of the house and she started to get out of the car. Suddenly, his entire affect and tone changed. She flinched as he pulled out a gun and said, “Stay put. Don’t get out of the car.” She did as she was told, but watched out the driver’s side window as he approached the house. He was almost to the porch when she saw the silhouette of a man stand up with his hands in the air. She rolled down the window and as soon as she heard the voice, she knew everything was okay. She got out of the car as the kid was putting his gun away and her heart sped up when she got close enough to make out Bruf’s features.
Bruf looked at her, and simply said, “Why don’t you go on in? I’m going to walk Cubbie here to the car.”
Confused about what he was doing there, but excited to see him, Sabrina did as he asked and a minute later he was back at the door. She let him inside and they awkwardly stare
d at each other for several long seconds. Bruf finally spoke first:
“I want you.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Like...sexually?”
He gave her a predatory grin and said, “Well, yeah...but more than that.” His eyes went to her belly and he said, “I want you to go back to Florida where you’re safe and have that baby...but I want you to come back. You can do that, right? I mean, you can go to school here...I know your mom’s there too...”
“What changed?” she interrupted. They could talk logistics later. She needed to know why he’d had such a sudden change of heart. “You rushed out of here yesterday like I had the plague...and then at the gym earlier you told me to go home, like there was no chance for us.”
“I’m not good with words, Sabrina. I’m not sure I can explain it.”
“Try,” she said. “I’m sorry, but I need the words.”
He sighed, and she could tell he was uncomfortable, but it warmed her heart when he did begin to talk again. He was trying. “I grew up, first with parents that didn’t talk much, and then with a brother who talked all the time...just because he loves the sound of his own voice. But nobody really talked about their feelings and I have no clue how to do that.”
Sabrina thought about his parents’ horrible deaths and what that must have done to him, not to mention what she now knew about his brother. Her heart ached for him, but she still had to be cautious of her own. She took a step closer to him and held out her hand. He took it and she led him into the living room. They sat down on the couch and she said, “There’s no trick to saying how you feel, Bruf...you just say it. You stop worrying about how it’s going to sound or how the other person is going to react to it and you just say it.”
“I did, kind of. I want you.”
She laughed. “Okay, but what do you want me for?”
“I want you to be in my life. I want you to be here, with me. I want you to be my...” He stopped again, and she waited. Finally, he said, “I guess I want you to be my old lady.”
“You guess?”
He sighed. “I want you to be my old lady. But Wolf is going to have a problem with that, especially as long as you’re pregnant and I’m...There’s some stuff I need to do first. So, I need you to go home to Florida, and have the baby...and then we can start over. If you want to. I want to start over.”
Sabrina put her hands on her stomach and said, “Wolf loves us both. Somehow, I think we can convince him to let us give this a shot. But about the baby...When I planned on marrying Devin, it was just assumed that I would be the aunt, and no one would ask any questions. I could have a relationship with him or her...I just wouldn’t be its mother. I had a little trouble coming to terms with that at first, even after I’d signed a contract. You were right to worry that I might change my mind and want to keep the baby.” She saw him grimace and she went on, “But I can honestly tell you that every day that goes by, I come to terms a little more with the fact that this child is not mine to keep and raise. I made a promise and even if there wasn’t something legal in place, I could never do that to my friend. She already loves this child and I know that she’ll be a great mother. But...” He flinched when she said that, but he waited for her to go on. “I still want to be his or her aunt. I still want to be some part of this baby’s life. Can you handle that?”
He looked at her stomach like he was trying to picture it. She could see the wheels turning in his head and when all he finally said was “I’ll learn to,” she was disappointed. She wanted him to tell her how he felt, whether it was what she wanted to hear or not. Leaving that subject alone for the time being, though, she asked:
“Are you and Wolf okay?”
“No,” he said, “but we will be. I just need some time to deal with a few things and I need to know you’re in a safe place while I’m doing that.”
“But I don’t get to know what it is you’re dealing with?” He didn’t answer her, so she said, “Is it about your brother?”
“It’s about him, it’s about you, it’s about Wolf and my future with this club. I can’t go into this, a real relationship, without getting my shit in order first.”
“But you can’t tell me what that ‘shit’ is?”
“No. I honestly can’t...and this might not be the only time something comes up that I won’t be able to share with you, Sabrina. There are reasons for it...mostly, keeping you and everyone around you safe. It’s the way we operate, and I don’t see it changing any time soon. Can you live with that?”
Sabrina nodded, for a second wondering if she really could, or if the heat that was crawling up her neck to burn her cheeks, or the tickle in her belly and the fire in her gut, were taking over her thoughts. She didn’t think clearly when he was so close to her. Her head shut down and her body took over...and that nod, right or wrong, was simply because she was ready to table the conversation and move on to the make-up sex. Bruf leaned in close, so close that his features were blurred, and his lips hovered over hers. “Tell me you want me,” he whispered.
“I want you,” she said, without hesitation. “I want you so bad...” His lips were against hers even before she finished talking and his tongue was working its way between her teeth. Sabrina pressed her residual thoughts to the back of her mind, wrapped her lips around his tongue, and sucked on it. Bruf’s moan stole the last shred of control she might have been hanging onto. His hands were on her body and he was devouring her mouth as he stood up, pulling her along with him, and lifted her off the floor. She wrapped her legs around his waist and his calloused hands slid up underneath her shirt and caressed her back as he turned them around and carried her toward the hallway.
Sabrina felt her clit pulsing against her wet panties as her jeans rubbed into his hard abs. She held onto his face with both hands and tightened the muscles in her thighs to hold onto his waist, and she bounced up and down against him, practically masturbating herself into him. She closed her eyes and Bruf’s lips left her mouth and landed on her throat. He put his hands underneath her ass and held her against him even tighter, letting her rub herself in tight little circles, letting the heat build even more between them as she approached an orgasm, with both of them fully dressed and upright. She felt him stop walking, but she didn’t open her eyes. She continued to rub and bounce into him and he continued to bite and suck at her neck. It was only minutes, maybe even seconds, before she threw her head back even further and cried out as her insides turned to liquid heat and her jeans were soaked with it. She’d never had an orgasm that easily. When she opened her eyes Bruf had his head tipped back too and he was smiling at her. He laid her down on the bed in the guest bedroom and that was when she saw the wet spot on the front of his shirt. She wondered what he must have thought of her...getting herself off on him like that. She felt herself blush and Bruf said:
“Huh-uh...no blushing. I don’t want you shy with me, Sabrina. I want you to tell me you want this.”
She opened her mouth, and nothing but a croak came out. She closed it again, swallowed, cleared her throat and swallowed again, and then she said, “I want this. I want you.”
Bruf started stripping off his clothes then. Sabrina was so entranced by watching him that he had to remind her to take hers off too. When they were both naked he shook his head slightly and said, “So fucking beautiful.” He put his hands on her waist and moved her on the bed so that her legs were dangling off the side. He pushed them open with one of his hard thighs, brushing the tip of his rock-hard cock against her soft skin as he did, and causing her whole body to convulse. He saw her shudder and he grinned before dropping to his knees next to the bed and sinking his hot, wet tongue into her sopping-wet pussy. She had to grip onto the quilt that covered the bed to try to hold herself down as he slid his tongue along her slit, opening her lips up as he went and touching her most sensitive places. When his tongue finally hit her swollen clit she moved her hands to his hair and began rocking her hips up off the bed, saying his name over and over in a heated rush of breath.<
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Her body felt like it was overheating as he licked her and rubbed his face into her and sucked her hard clit into his mouth and nibbled on it. She was moving her hips so fast and hard that Bruf had to put one of his arms across her belly to hold her down. She had her eyes closed, but when she felt her second orgasm approaching, she opened them. His face was still between her legs and his tongue was still doing amazing things to her sensitive flesh, but his green eyes were looking directly at her face and the pure lust she saw in them was what put her over the edge. She tugged hard at his hair as her body went taut all over, and her hips came up even farther off the bed, and she exploded...even harder this time than she had the first. She felt him smile against her as he slowly worked her through the orgasm and helped her come back down to earth.
By the time her muscles were shaking all over and her legs felt like wet noodles, he was moving her to the center of the bed and settling himself between her legs. The feel of his big, hard cock resting against the top of her mound was off the hook, especially when he began to rub himself back and forth, striking her clit each time. She grabbed him by the hips and raised hers and let out a breathless “Please...”
“Please what, baby?...Tell me what you want.”
“I want you, Bruf. I want you inside of me...please.”
He continued to tease her while leaning down and licking across her lips and then down to her breasts. He sucked one of her nipples into his mouth and wound his tongue around it. She whimpered as he used his lips, teeth, and tongue to make love to first one and then the other of her breasts. When she was completely relaxed, eyes closed, floating on the fringes of a cloud somewhere, higher than she’d ever been...that was when she felt him slide into her. He stretched her open slowly, rocking back and forth into her and against her until he was buried inside and the walls of her pussy were on fire. She was moving underneath him, unable to keep herself still. Bruf, who seemed to have much more self-control than she did, reached for her hands and brought them up over her head. He positioned himself so he could hold onto them in a push-up position. She was completely at his mercy then, unable to move, or even protest if she wanted to. But she didn’t want to. She didn’t want him to stop what he was doing. She did want him to go faster. He was moving so slowly that it was almost agonizing...but he had her pinned so she couldn’t make him move any faster.
