Welcome to Temptation/Bet Me

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Welcome to Temptation/Bet Me Page 57

by Jennifer Crusie


  “What else does he do?” Bonnie said, and Tony grinned at her.

  “He has skills we’ll discuss later,” Liza said. “This is excellent pasta, Emilio. This place should be packed every night.”

  “Which is your job,” Min said to her. “Save Emilio. I love him.”

  “I think so,” Liza said. “Let me check out the kitchen first.”

  She got up, walked past Emilio, and pushed her way through the swinging doors.

  “Is she—” he said to Min.

  “She’s the best waitress you’ll ever have,” Min said. “And she will get you business. She’s checking out your kitchen now. If you pass muster, you’ve got her.”

  Emilio went to protect his kitchen from Liza, and Cal poured more wine into Min’s glass. “Drink this. I’m about to try to talk you into something, and I need you juiced.”

  “I kind of miss the charm,” Min said, picking up her glass. “Listen, I was thinking about the snow globe and the movies and everything, and I apologize for calling you the devil. They were all coincidences.”

  “Yeah,” Cal said. “Tony thinks it’s chaos theory.”

  “Bonnie thinks it’s the fairy tale,” Min said, and sipped her wine.

  “Fairy tale?” Cal said, lost again.

  “You know, you’re a prince, it’s meant to be, we’ll live happily ever after. It’s okay, she’s sane on everything else.” Min smiled at him. The point is, we’ll be fine as long as we stick to the plan.”

  “Right,” Cal said. “The plan.” Her lips were soft and full, curved in that comforting smile, and he started to get dizzy again. Kiss me. “I think we should start dating. Want to go to the movies?”

  Min blinked at him and put down her glass. “Did you hear anything I said?”

  “Everything was a coincidence, we should stick to the plan,” Cal said. “That’s not going to work for me.”

  Min folded her arms. “Why not?”

  “Because if we don’t date, the universe is going to maim me.”

  “What?”

  “The universe, fate, chaos theory, fairy tales, the spirit of Elvis, I don’t know what it is, but I’m not fighting it anymore.” Cal leaned closer and caught the faint scent of lavender again as Min looked at him as if he were insane. “You hate me, you’re high maintenance, you’re pathological about food, and your best friend will kill me someday, but it doesn’t matter. I’m going to give this a shot. Does your mother still want to check me out at dinner? I’ll go”

  “Why, if I’m that awful?” Min said, looking annoyed.

  He smiled down into her beautiful face. “Because you’re smart and kind and funny, and my nephew is crazy about you, and you wear great shoes, and you look like a depraved angel.” Because I’m going to go crazy if I don’t touch you.

  “Uh huh.” Min nodded. “And because of that, you’re going to dinner at my parents’ house tomorrow night so my mother can see you’re harmless?”

  “Tomorrow?” He nodded, trying not to look appalled. “Good. We’ll get that out of the way fast. Tomorrow night it is. So about tonight—”

  “On the dating thing? No, so you’re off the hook with my mother, you do not need to go to dinner. But if you want to do a friends-night-out thing, we could go to the movies. Blue Hawaii is playing at ten o’clock.”

  “Blue Hawaii,” Cal said. “I don’t suppose that’s porn.”

  “It’s part of the Elvis revival,” Min said. “You don’t have to go.”

  Cal sighed. “Yes, I do. And I’m going to your parents’ tomorrow, too.”

  “I’m not understanding this at all,” Min said, and he took her hand, happy to be touching her again, and said, “Come with me, Minnie. I will explain.”

  He pulled her out of her chair and across the restaurant to the front door, and when they were out on the darkened street, he leaned down, his heart pounding, and he kissed her with no reservation at all. The familiar rush was fast and hot as always, hotter because he wasn’t fighting it, but there was comfort there, too, she felt so right under his hands, against his mouth, and when she slipped her arms around his neck, he kissed her harder, falling into her helplessly, not even trying to save himself. He felt her move closer, and her perfect mouth opened as her lush body pressed against him, and years passed, and he saw paradise, and the voice in his head whispered, THIS ONE, YOU IDIOT. Then something smacked him hard on the arm and jarred them both out of the kiss.

  “What the—” he began, still holding on to her, and then saw Liza, standing on the sidewalk with her purse. “You know, if Bonnie is right, a leprechaun will be by any minute to kneecap you.”

  “Liza,” Min said, stepping away from him a little, and he felt cold where she’d been touching him and held on to her.

  “I didn’t hit him on the head,” Liza said.

  Cal looked at Min. “Forget her. You want to know why? This is why. It really is bigger than the both of us, and I, for one, am not fighting it anymore.” She opened her mouth to say something and he said, “And you want this, too.”

  Liza scowled at him. “Oh, tell me you know her. Tell me—”

  “Yes, I do know her, although not as well as I’m going to,” Cal said, facing her down. “And yes, I care about her. A lot. And I don’t know the rest, but I’m going to find out. Is that all right with you?”

  Liza looked at him for a moment. “Yes. But I’m watching you.”

  “All right then,” Cal said, feeling relieved in general. The just-friends bit wasn’t good, but that was okay, he was good at courting women. We’re playing my game now, he thought and looked down at Min with great affection.

  “Don’t look at me like that,” Min said and turned to Liza. “We’re going to the ten o’clock movie, just as friends. Want to come?”

  “Yes. Tony?” Liza said as Tony came out of the bar to find her. “We’re going to the movies at ten.”

  “It’s Blue Hawaii,” Cal said to Tony.

  “I don’t suppose that’s porn,” Tony said.

  “It’s Elvis,” Cal said.

  “Why?” Tony said.

  “Because it’s time to make my move,” Cal said, looking down at Min.

  “Hey,” Min said.

  “Oh, well, hell, then,” Tony said. “Let’s go.”

  Min had started her Saturday by calling her mother to tell her that Cal would, in fact, be dining with them that night.

  “We’ll see what kind of man he is,” Nanette said, her tone boding no good for Cal.

  “You’re going to love him,” Min said. “He’s gorgeous and successful.”

  Nanette sniffed. “Probably the kind who thinks he’s an eight and you’re a four. Men are shallow and treacherous. Wear something slimming.”

  “He’s a ten, Mother,” Min said. “And I’m not slim.”

  After that, baseball seemed an improvement, at least until she got to the park.

  “You’re sticking with me,” she told Liza. “Bonnie always wanders off with Roger, but you are staying so you can jab me if I start to act goofy around Cal.”

  “There’s not that much jab in the world,” Liza said, but she followed Min to the bleachers anyway.

  “Min,” Harry yelled when he saw her, and she stopped to smile at him as he came running up.

  “Hey, you,” she said as he skidded to a halt in front of her. “How’s it going?”

  “Good,” he said, nodding his head. “Thanks for coming.” Then he looked down and said, “Whoa. Cool shoes.”

  “Thank you,” Min said as Harry bent closer to see the blue plastic fish that overlapped across the toes of her sandals. “You know, you’re a lot like your uncle.”

  “Harrison, your instincts are right,” Cal said from behind them, and Min jumped. “Women are more important than baseball, but get your butt back to the outfield anyway.” Then she turned and he grinned at her, his face softening, and her heart rate bumped up again. “Minnie, you’re getting freckles on your nose.”

  “I know.” Mi
n rubbed the bridge of her nose, trying not to care about the affection in his voice. “It’s these Saturday mornings. I never go out in the sun so I keep forgetting to get sunscreen.”

  “I like them,” Cal said, and Min felt her heart bump again.

  “Me, too,” Harry said from below.

  “I don’t,” Min said, trying to keep a grip. “But I’m stuck with them because I keep forgetting—”

  Cal took off his cap and put it on her head. “Problem solved.” His grin widened. “Very cute. You can play for my team any time.”

  “Stop that,” Min said, and tried to adjust the hat so it wouldn’t squash her curls. It felt warm from him, and she kept her hand on it a minute longer just to feel it. You’re worthless, she told herself.

  “Harry!” somebody called, and Min turned and saw Cynthie walking toward them in a fluttery pink dress, smiling beautifully at Harry. “How are you, buddy?”

  Harry scowled. “Hi.”

  “Hi, Cynthie,” Min said, trying not to hate her, and turned back to Harry. “We’re going to go get good seats. Knock ’em dead, kid.” She looked past Cal’s ear, avoiding eye contact. “Thanks for the hat. I’m sure it makes me look like hell.”

  “Nah.” Cal tapped it on the brim. “It makes you look like a butch angel. Shanna should be here.”

  Min smiled at him in spite of herself, warm all over, and then Tony yelled, “Hey, we’re playing baseball here,” and Cal dragged Harry onto the field.

  “How’d I do?” she said to Liza.

  “As well as could be expected under the circumstances,” Liza said.

  “Do at what?” Cynthie said.

  “I’m practicing my cool,” Min said.

  “Oh,” Cynthie said. “Well, good job.”

  Min followed Liza and Cynthie over to where Bonnie was sitting and watched Harry’s team get killed in the first three innings, trying not to watch Cal. When he looked up and caught her looking at him, he grinned, and she thought, Oh, for heaven’s sake, Minerva, and turned to Liza to distract herself. “You’d think Tony would be apoplectic by now,” Min said to Liza.

  “No,” Liza said. “He just wants them to have a good time. He yells at them so they’ll get better, but he doesn’t care if they win. He says all their games are practice for the future.”

  “Really?” Min said. “He does have layers.”

  “Only about three,” Liza said. “I was wrong about him being dumb, though, he’s actually quite bright. He’s a nice guy.”

  “That’s all?” Min said.

  “Yes,” Liza said. “That’s all. He is not The One. Speaking of which, nice ball cap you got there, Stats.” She tapped the brim. “Maybe he’ll buy you a soda after the game.”

  Min shook her head. “We’re just—”

  “It’s the fairy tale,” Bonnie said. “He’s winning you.”

  “What?” Cynthie said. “Fairy tale?”

  “Yes,” Bonnie said. “Min and Cal, they’re a fairy tale. She’s the girl who doesn’t have the life she deserves, so her fairy godmother got her a prince to rescue her.”

  “Fairy godmother?” Min said.

  “Liza,” Bonnie said. “She picked Cal out for you.”

  “Wait a minute,” Liza said. “I am not accepting responsibility for Calvin Morrisey.”

  Min started to laugh. “You did pick him out. You sent me over there to meet him. Now, that’s funny.”

  “A fairy tale,” Cynthie said, sounding as if she wasn’t sure they were serious.

  Bonnie nodded. “Cal gave her the ball cap because it’s part of his quest.”

  “No, he gave her the ball cap because he’s courting,” Cynthie said, a little sharply. “It’s part of the attraction stage.”

  “Attraction stage,” Liza said.

  “He is not attracted—” Min began.

  “There are four stages to mature love,” Cynthie said. “Assumption, attraction, infatuation, and attachment.”

  “Now, see, I would have called the way he looks at her infatuation,” Liza said.

  “Excuse me?” Min said, looking at her best friend, the betrayer.

  “It’s the fairy tale,” Bonnie said.

  “It’s attraction,” Cynthie said flatly.

  “It’s love, a random reaction,” Liza said. “Chaos theory.”

  “Hey,” Min said, and they looked at her. “It’s a kind act by a friend because I don’t want freckles. Not everything is a theory.”

  “The fairy tale is not a theory,” Bonnie said. “Even if you won’t believe it’s happening to you, it’s happening to me.” She smiled at them all, too happy to be smug.

  “So how’s Roger?” Min said, more than willing to have somebody else be the topic at hand.

  “He is The One,” Bonnie said. “He’s going to propose in a couple of weeks and I’ll say yes. I told my mama to plan the wedding for August.”

  “He told you he’s going to propose?” Cynthie said, and when Bonnie looked at her, surprised, she said, “I’m writing a book on this. It’s none of my business, but I am interested.”

  “Oh,” Bonnie said. “Well, no, he hasn’t told me. I just know.”

  Min tried to look supportive, but the silence that settled over them must have reeked of skepticism because Bonnie turned back to the field and called Roger’s name. When he came trotting over to them, she said, “Honey, are you going to ask me to marry you?”

  “Yes,” he said. “I didn’t want to rush you, so I thought I’d wait till our one-month anniversary. It’s only eleven days.”

  “Very sensible,” Bonnie said. “Just so you know, I’m going to say yes.”

  Roger sighed. “That takes a lot of the worry out of it.” He leaned over and kissed her and went back to the field.

  “That was either really sweet or really annoying,” Liza said.

  “It was sweet,” Min said, trying to imagine Cal saying any of that. Stop thinking about him. “And annoying.”

  “I told you,” Bonnie said. “It’s the fairy tale. You have to believe.”

  “Positive thinking,” Cynthie said, nodding. “There’s good evidence for that. Could I interview you? For my book. Because this is fascinating. You’ve moved into the infatuation phase very quickly.”

  “Sure,” Bonnie said. “But it’s not infatuation. This is True Love. Like Cal and Min.”

  “Will you stop that?” Min said.

  “Of course,” Cynthie said to Bonnie with no conviction whatsoever, and they began to talk.

  Min took a deep breath and turned back to Liza. “Cynthie seems nice,” she said quietly, hoping for a conversation that didn’t have Cal in it.

  “She is,” Liza said. “But I think she wants Cal back.”

  Min gave up and stared out at the field where Cal was talking to somebody on third base. His face was serious again, and the kid nodded, hanging on his every word. What a darling, she thought and then remembered, No, beast, but that wasn’t working anymore. Well, it had never worked, really.

  “Are you going out tonight?” Liza asked.

  “Yes, but just as friends,” Min said. “He’s doing me a favor. We’re going to my mother’s so she can stop worrying about him being a vile seducer.”

  Liza shook her head, looking doubtful. “I don’t think meeting Cal is going to reassure your mother.”

  “Why not? Elvis likes him. And Elvis has very good instincts.”

  “Elvis?” Liza said, sounding alarmed.

  “The cat. I named him Elvis,” Min said.

  Liza sighed. “Thank God. I thought you’d finally cracked.”

  “Hey, I’m not the one who believes in the fairy tale,” Min said. “Or in chaos theory, for that matter.”

  “Or the four-step program to love,” Liza said, jerking her head toward Cynthie, who was listening to Bonnie finish up the theory of fairy tale love.

  “Right,” Min said. “That’s all garbage. You don’t need a theory, you just have to be practical, figure out what it is you wa
nt in a man, and then find one who has those things. Make a plan. Stick to it.” Her eyes went to Cal. “Don’t get distracted.”

  Liza rolled her eyes. “Or you could just fall the fuck in love.”

  “Oh, right,” Min said, looking away from Cal. “That’s like saying you could just fall off a building. Because it won’t hurt until you land.”

  Liza drew back. “I just meant—”

  “No,” Min said as several people turned to look at her. “You have to be sensible. It’s not silly love songs and sloppy kisses, it’s dangerous. People die for it. People die from it. Wars are fought. Empires fall.”

  “Uh, Min . . .”

  “It can ruin your life,” Min said, shutting her eyes so she wouldn’t look for Cal. “Which is why I’m staying friends with Cal, nothing more. I’d have to be insane to think there could be anything permanent. Masochistic. Suicidal. Delusional.”

  “Uh huh,” Liza said.

  “So that’s my plan,” Min said. “And I’m sticking to it.”

  “Right,” Liza said.

  When the game was over, Harry came up and said, “Uncle Cal said we can go to lunch if you’ll come,” and Min said, “Well . . .” and thought Calvin, you nephew-exploiting bastard. Still, lunch wouldn’t kill her. It was okay to have lunch with a friend. And his nephew. Like a chaperone.

  “Uh huh,” Liza said, even though Min hadn’t spoken.

  She made him take them to a retro diner where she and Harry played Elvis all the way through lunch, a new experience for Harry, who’d been raised on Chopin. Cal didn’t seem to mind. When they dropped her off, Harry said, “I’ll see you tomorrow, Min,” and she said, “Yes, you will. Dinner at Grandma’s.” Harry looked a little confused, and Cal said, “Harrison, I will pay you fifty bucks if you’ll call your grandmother that tomorrow.” “I don’t think so,” Harry said, and Min got out of the car feeling that tomorrow was going to explain a lot about Calvin Morrisey, assuming he lived through dinner that night with her parents.

  “Keep the cap, Minnie,” Cal said when she tried to hand it back to him through the window. “You look good in it. I’ll pick you up at eight.” Then he drove off and left her feeling ridiculously happy, which couldn’t be good.

  “You’re a mess,” she told herself, and went to get ready for dinner with her mother.

 

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