“Seriously, Brett? During a party? Is it so hard to use a damn bathroom?”
I held my hands up in surrender. “In my defense it’s like a rite of passage for boys to pee outside. It was only a matter of time.”
“I swear to God, Brett, if I get a phone call from the daycare saying he dropped his pants to piss on the playground, I’m gonna kick your ass.”
“Look, beauty, this is the kind of stuff you’ll just have to deal with. It’s every penis-carrying member of society’s God given right to whiz outdoors. Don’t be jealous.”
She smiled brightly, and I could have sworn I hadn’t seen those jade eyes light up like that since I’d met her. It hit me right then and there that I’d do anything to put that smile on her face as often as possible. A woman that beautiful should always smile that happily.
“This is an amazing party, Brett. I can’t even begin to thank you and your friends enough for helping me pull this off.”
I couldn’t keep myself from touching her right in that moment. Reaching up, I brushed a strand of hair from her cheek. “They’re your friends too, Kenz, and we’ll always be here to help you and those kids, any way you’re willing to allow us to.”
Her smile faded as she studied me, a frown marring her beautiful face. I missed her smile immensely the moment it disappeared.
“I’m not good for you, Brett. I need you to know that.”
The moment she said that, a massive knot coiled in my gut. How could she not see how wrong she was? The more time we spent together, the clearer it was becoming that she was perfect for me.
“Kenzie—”
“No, please,” she interrupted. “Hear me out.” Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath before concentrating on me once again.
“You’re an amazing guy, Brett. I know that, and I also know that the twins and I are lucky to have you in our lives. But I’m not good for you. If I let this go any further than friendship, things would eventually go bad and you’d end up resenting me. It’s happened before. I’m too damaged, and I’d hate myself if I let a wonderful man like you get pulled down all because of me. You deserve so much better than what I have to offer you.”
I could see the determination in her posture, the sincerity that shined through her eyes, and I knew that arguing with her at that moment would be a lost cause. She was too strong in her convictions to believe anything I would say. But I’d be damned if I was giving up on her.
“I’ll let you have this win right now, baby, because I can see how much you believe what you’re saying.”
“It’s the truth,” she insisted, but I just pushed on, taking a step closer to her so she could see the sincerity in my eyes.
“But I know what you really are. I know how amazing of a person you are and how wonderful of a mother you are. And I’m not giving up on you. I don’t know what bullshit you’ve been dealt in your life, but I’m not like any of those people from your past who let you down. You will trust me one day, beauty, and until that day comes, I’ll be here waiting.”
Taking full advantage of her stunned silence, I leaned forward and planted a chaste kiss on her gorgeous lips.
“Now, let’s get back to the party. We’ve got two five-year-olds in serious need of cake.”
We’ve got two five-year-olds in serious need of cake.
Not you....WE.
That one little word was like a wrecking ball to the walls I had surrounding my heart. This man loved my kids. And despite my warnings, he still insisted in believing in me, no matter what.
I didn’t see how it was going to be possible to keep that man at arm’s length for much longer.
The truth was, I was falling hard for Brett, and it terrified me. One more hit to those well-constructed walls and they were going to come crumbling down around me.
Past
The day I met Lance I thought my life had changed for the better. I’d been waiting tables at a local restaurant when a handsome, older man came in and sat at one of the tables in my section. I could recall thinking that I’d never before seen such a handsome man in all my life. His dark, hard and chiseled features, his icy blue eyes framed by long dark lashes were all beautiful enough to draw my immediate attention. But it was that perfectly straight, white smile that had me enamored.
“H-hi,” I stammered as I stepped up to the table. “Uh…Can I help y-you?”
I kept my eyes trained on the floor, feeling awkward and frumpy in my waitress uniform standing next to him in his fancy three-piece suit.
“You know what would really make my day?” he asked, his voice sending a shiver through me. “If you’d let me see those pretty eyes of yours.”
There was no stopping the huge grin that spread across my face. I slowly lifted my head to see him grinning back.
“There they are. So beautiful. What’s your name, sweetheart?”
“Mackenzie,” I replied shyly.
“Well, Mackenzie, I’m Lance. Nice to meet you.”
For the rest of his meal, he made a point to start a conversation with me any time I’d stop at his table for a refill, or to drop off his plate. He asked for my suggestion on what to order. He asked how I liked waitressing. He seemed thoroughly interested in everything about me. I told him about wanting to be a nail technician and one owning my own salon. By the time he’d finished eating, I was completely smitten with him. So when he asked me how old I was, my heart sank because I knew I’d never see him again when he found out I was only a teenager. He was a lawyer. He was well aware of the trouble he’d get in for dating a minor.
“Hey, why the sad face? What happened to my beautiful smile?” Lance asked me when he saw my frown.
“I-I’m only seventeen.” I spoke softly, too nervous to meet his clear blue gaze.
“How much longer until you turn eighteen?”
I quickly looked up, surprised by his response. I was so certain he’d brush me off when he found out how young I was, even though my life had already made me feel so much older than I was.
“Three months,” I answered, my voice full of hope.
“Well then, it looks like we’re just going to have to spend the next three months as friends. You see, I know a good thing when I see it. And, Mackenzie, something tells me you and I were meant to meet each other.” His smile was so charming I felt my heart squeeze. “I feel a strong connection to you, Mackenzie. Don’t you feel it?”
“I do,” I breathed, stunned that he felt the same thing I was feeling.
“Good. Until then, I’d love to get to know you, sweetheart. What do you say?”
I nodded, grinning like a little schoolgirl. I felt it down to my bones. Lance was the man who was going to make my life better.
The next three months were heaven. Lance came in to the restaurant as often as he could, just to see me. He even bought me a cell phone so we could talk at night after my parents had gone to bed. I’d talk to him about how miserable I was and how I just wanted to escape, and he’d tell stories of all the wonderful things he’d show me when he got me out of that godforsaken hell hole. He was going to take me on trips, show me the world. He talked about putting me through school and buying me my very own salon. He said he wanted nothing more than to spoil me every chance he got, and how, when we were married, he was going to make my life so happy I’d never leave him.
I was in love. Lance was my knight in shining armor. He was going to save me, give me a good life. He was so patient, so kind and loving as he waited out the days for my eighteenth birthday. With my future before me, and Lance waiting in the wings, I was able to get through those three months knowing what was waiting for me on the other side.
On the morning of my eighteenth birthday, I woke with a sense of happiness I’d never experienced before. It was finally the day. My life would start.
I went to school that morning, my senior year coming to a close in less than a month. Lance showed up at the front of my high school as I was walking up, holding a dozen long-stemmed red roses. When I worked
my shift at the restaurant that afternoon, he was there with the most beautiful heart-shaped pendant necklace. After clasping it around my neck, he gave me my first kiss. The sweetest, most romantic kiss ever. It was truly the stuff of fairy tales.
Later that night, he drove me home, accompanying me inside. It was the last time I’d ever step foot inside that house again. As I packed up what little belongings I had, my father ranted and raved that I would never be allowed in his house again if I left with Lance. That was fine with me; I had no intentions of ever seeing either of my parents again for as long as I lived.
“Gary, just let her go,” my mother pleaded. I could hear the excitement in her voice as she spoke. “With her gone, things can go back to how they used to be. We can be happy again. She’s the reason we’ve been so miserable!”
“Shut your fucking mouth, Nancy!” my father hollered. “You’re both fucking poison. I should have left you both years ago.” He stepped up to Lance as we headed for the front door. “I should be thanking you. You’re taking this worthless piece of shit off my hands.”
Lance took my hand in his and led me away without so much as a word to my father. He dropped my bag in the trunk of his car and walked over to open my door for me before going around and climbing into the driver’s seat. As we pulled away, I looked back one last time. My father was rushing out the door and climbing into the cab of his truck, my mother close on his heels, crying and begging him not to leave. He shoved her to the ground and climbed in, peeling off to whatever bar or whatever mistress he was in the mood for. Something deep in my gut told me he wouldn’t be going back, that he was leaving my mother for good. And as we pulled around the corner, away from that horrible house, I couldn’t find it in myself to feel sad for her.
The abuse began so subtly, so methodically, that it took me looking back on that time to realize just how bad it had been. Lance managed to alienate me from anyone else in my life, but he did it in a way that made me believe it was my idea.
He’d talk about the time I spent with friends and co-workers. He’d lay on the guilt, making me feel as though I’d neglected him until I pulled away from anyone who could have taken my time away from Lance.
I became so obsessed with making him happy that I hadn’t even realized I’d made him the only person in my world. Everything I did was to please him. My sole reason for existing was Lance. Unfortunately, by the time I realized what was happening, I was in too deep. I had nowhere to go, no one to turn to for help.
I’d mistakenly thought I could rectify the situation simply by talking to Lance. One night I voiced my concerns about not having a social life outside of our relationship, so sure he’d understand my dilemma and support me in building a life outside of us.
The problem was, I’d unknowingly tied myself to the worse kind of abuser. As the years passed, it became evident that Lance was even worse than my father. His abuse started out mentally and emotionally long before the physical violence.
It had been three years into our relationship before he’d even taken his hands to me. But the night I brought up wanting to spend more time with friends was the night everything changed. My face was so bruised I’d had to take an entire week off work before the swelling and discoloration went away enough for me to cover them with makeup. He’d come home from work the day after with an engagement ring. He got down on his knees, crying and begging, swearing over and over it would never happen again. And like a fool, I believed him. I accepted his proposal, naively thinking that nothing like that would ever happen again.
I was so very wrong.
The beatings grew so frequent that I was let go from my job at the salon for missing so much work. I had no money, no friends, and no family. I was, once again, well and truly alone.
I was trapped.
Every time he hit or kicked me, it was my fault. My fault for burning dinner, my fault for knowing how to push his buttons, my fault for not understanding the stress he was under at work. He thrived on letting me know that I was the reason for his anger and violence. He was the second man in my life who I’d turned into a monster.
I was cursed.
The only time he didn’t hit me was when I was carrying the twins, but that didn’t mean all forms of abuse stopped.
Oh no, I was told daily how fat I was getting, or how undesirable I’d become. When I didn’t have the energy to clean the house, I was a disgusting, lazy slob. When my back hurt to the point of tears, I was being dramatic. I was to blame for Lance’s cheating because I’d let myself go and he couldn’t stand to look at my body.
Once the twins were born, I’d worked tirelessly to get my pre-pregnancy body back. But there were just some things that carrying two babies did to a woman’s figure that couldn’t be undone, no matter how many hours were spent in a gym.
It was during one of those grueling workout sessions with the personal trainer that Lance hired that I realized something that rocked me to my core.
I had turned into my mother.
Present
“You tracked Kenzie’s every move at the party last week. I don’t think you took your eyes off her for more than a minute. Might as well admit it, dude. You’ve got a serious hard-on for that woman.” Trevor had been at it since we sat down at Colt’s. So far, beers with the guys consisted of them giving me shit about Kenzie. And as usual, Trevor was the worst.
“You won’t hear me denying that, brother.”
“You want to wife that chick and you know it.”
I looked over at Trevor with a look that screamed you’re one to talk.
“This coming from the man who got Lizzy loaded just to get her down the aisle?” I scoffed.
“Eh, if it works, it works. At least I’m getting it on the regular now.”
“I said I had a hard-on for her. Not that I wanted to marry her.”
“We all saw you at that party, man,” Luke chimed in. “You’re more whipped than poor Ben over here.”
Ben’s offended gaze shot towards Luke. “What the hell! I’m not whipped.”
Trevor let out a snort before saying, “I work with that woman. I know the set of balls she’s got on her. Any man dating her doesn’t have a choice but to be whipped. It’s your cross to bear, Benny boy, just accept it. Only reason we don’t give you more shit about it is because she’s hot as hell.”
Ben’s eyes narrowed on Trevor. “You know Lizzy’s keeping me on retainer, right? Just in case you fuck up and she needs a good defense for murdering you.”
Just as everyone burst into laughter, Luke’s phone went off.
“Ah, hell,” he muttered, looking down at the screen before sliding it back into his pocket. “I gotta go.”
“I thought you weren’t on call tonight?” I asked.
“I’m not, but I want to be on scene.” Concern spread over is features as he said, “I think you need to come with me.”
Icy dread filled my chest at the look of concern on Luke’s face.
“What’s going on?”
“String of break-ins. Someone got shot.” He shook his head sullenly before adding “It’s Kenzie’s apartment complex, man.”
He barely had enough time to complete the sentence before I was out of my chair, heading for the door at a run, my heart firmly lodged in my throat.
BANG!
I woke from a dead sleep by what sounded like a gunshot. Disoriented and shaking, I thought for a moment that it had just been a dream. That was, until the twins came running into my bedroom; their eyes bugged out in fright.
“Mommy,” Callie shrieked as she and Cameron dove onto my bed, scrambling toward me and climbing under the covers.
“It’s okay. It’s okay,” I soothed, wrapping the both of them in my arms at the same time I tried to steady my own heart rate.
The sound of sirens, accompanied by blue and red lights, came through my bedroom window. I had no idea what was going on, but whatever it was, it wasn’t good. My mind immediately went to that dark place. What if he’s out there
? What if Lance found us?
The commotion from outside grew louder and louder, causing my fear to grow along with it, until it squeezed my chest like an ice cold fist.
“Mommy, what’s happening?” Cameron whimpered from beneath my arm.
“I don’t know, baby. But it’s all going to be okay. It’s going to be okay,” I repeated on a whisper, trying to remind myself that Lance had no clue where we were.
A loud pounding on the front door started screams from all three of us.
“Kenzie! Open the door!”
Oh, God. He’s here. He found us. No! No no no no.
“Beauty, it’s me. I need you to open the door, baby.”
Beauty. Lance never called me beauty. Oh, God. It was Brett. Jumping from the bed, I ran down the hallway as fast as I could. My fingers fumbled with the deadbolt and chain lock; my hands shook uncontrollably. As soon as I got the door open, Brett barged through and wrapped me in his tight embrace. The moment I was in his arms, all of the fear disappeared. I was safe. My kids were safe. I was overwhelmed by how much I trusted Brett at that very moment. I knew…I just knew that if he was there, my children and I had nothing to fear.
“Brett! Brett! Brett!”
The twins came barreling down the hall, not stopping until they’d latched onto both our legs, forming a big group hug in the middle of the doorway.
“Let’s move this inside, yeah?” Brett asked softly, finally pulling from our little huddle and guiding us into the living room before shutting and locking the door behind him.
“W-what’s going on out there?” I asked, wringing my hands nervously in front of me.
“A bunch of apartments were broken into tonight. One of the men drew a gun on the burglars and fired. Luckily, no one was seriously hurt. Stupid fu—I mean…uh, the police arrested three teenage boys for the break ins. Apparently, they thought it’d be funny to take a dare from some of their buddies at school. Now two are in the back of squad cars and the other is on the way to the hospital to have bullet removed from his leg.
Worth the Wait (Picking up the Pieces #4) Page 10
