Elusive Mr. Perfect

by Murray, Tamela Hancock

  “Whoever answers that will be running a mile a minute,” Joelle told Theodosia. She scanned more ads.

  “Here’s one. ‘I love the glamour of Old Hollywood and spend most Saturday afternoons with a bag of popcorn and a soda, staring at the Silver Screen. How about you?’ ” Joelle shook her head. “Not sure I want a couch potato. Wonder how much buttered popcorn he’s consumed in his life?” After rolling her eyes at the bear, Joelle sighed and kept reading. Some of the ads had been running for weeks. She thought better than to take a chance on any of those. None of the new ads looked appealing. “Maybe I’ve gotten too cynical, or maybe the Lord is trying to tell me to wait. What do you think?” Ready to give up, she folded the paper. Suddenly, her gaze rested on a new ad:

  Sensitive, spiritual man, 29, in quest of sensitive, spiritual woman, 22–32, who is willing to explore the love of God. Fellow seekers wishing to follow a path of inquiry and discovery with the desire to develop a committed relationship are most appealing. If you judge only by the outside of a person, not his heart, or if material gain, status, and power are what you desire, look elsewhere. But if you want to experience Freedom, true Freedom, then call me.

  She read the ad several times, concentrating on the meaning of each phrase. “Maybe that’s it,” she told her bear. “I’ve been saying I really wanted to focus on my spiritual growth. Since that’s all this ad promises, maybe this man is worth meeting.”

  With hope in her heart, she reread the latest ad. Its author didn’t reveal anything about his interests, other than the spiritual. Surely the Lord must be first and foremost in this man’s life.

  “That must have been my mistake,” she mused. “I should have been looking for someone totally devoted to the Lord.” She looked at the printed promises again. “He says he wants a fellow seeker. Hmm. I guess I qualify. What do you say, Theodosia? Do you think I should take the plunge?”

  Speaking the words aloud gave her the courage she needed. Without thinking further, she picked up the phone and made the call. Expecting to wait through a few rings, Joelle was taken aback when a man answered almost before the first ring was complete.

  “You must have been right beside the phone,” she blurted.

  “Yes, I was.” The voice was guarded. “Do I know you?”

  “No—”

  “Look,” the voice grew gruff, “if you’re calling again about that newspaper subscription, I told you I’m not interested. Can’t you people take no for an answer?”

  “Don’t hang up!” When she didn’t hear the click of the receiver cutting off the connection, she continued. “I’m calling about the personals ad in Today’s Southwest Virginian Christian Singles.”

  “Oh! The ad!” The voice became softer. “I’m sorry I was rude. You sound just like the woman who keeps begging me to take out a newspaper subscription.”

  “So I gathered.”

  He snickered. “Can we start over?”

  “Sure. Can’t hurt.” She paused for effect. “I’m calling about a personals ad in the latest edition of Today’s Southwest Virginian Christian Singles—the one that promises freedom. Am I speaking to the man who placed it?”

  “As a matter of fact, you are. It’s nice to meet you.”

  “Nice to meet you, too.” She giggled in spite of herself.

  “So,” he asked, “out of all the ads you must have read, what made you decide to call me?”

  As a variety of responses flashed through her mind, she decided honesty was the best tactic. “I’m looking for someone spiritual.”

  “Good. Are you a spiritual seeker?”

  “I’m always looking to draw closer to the Lord, yes.”

  He paused. Joelle wondered if he didn’t like what she had to say. “Hello?” she asked. “Are you still there?”

  “Yes, I’m still here.” He didn’t say more, allowing silence to ease over the phone line.

  She hadn’t expected her future date to be so shy. An adventurer was what she had pictured, since he’d advertised himself as a seeker. Joelle tried to bring him out of his shell. “So, what else would you like to tell me about yourself?”

  “I have good intuition. I can tell just from talking to you that you are a very good person.”

  “I’m working on it.” She let out a nervous giggle. “So what’s your name?”

  “The name my parents gave me is Abe, but my real name is Freedom.”

  “Freedom.” The name seemed strange, until she remembered the wording of his ad. “You sure were clever in your ad.”

  “I thought so.”

  “So why did you change your name?”

  “I thought it suited me better than the name of a Jewish patriarch. When you meet me, I’m sure you’ll agree.”

  Joelle found Freedom’s objections confusing. “Are you Jewish?”

  “Of course not,” he scoffed. “If I were, I wouldn’t have placed an ad in a magazine with ‘Christian’ in the title, would I?”

  “I guess not.” Joelle felt foolish—too foolish to ask him to confirm he was a Christian.

  “So what’s your name? I’m assuming you still use the one your parents chose for you.”

  “Of course. I’m Joelle.”

  “Joelle. Hmm.” He paused.

  “It’s a combination of my parents’ names,” she found herself explaining.

  “Charming. I’ll bet you’re a brunette.”

  Joelle smiled into the phone. “I’m afraid your intuition failed you this time. I’m a natural blond, although I do wear teal contacts to liven up the color of my eyes.”

  “Is that your only form of subterfuge?”

  “I like to think so.”

  “Good. You sound like someone who’s up for exploration,” he said. “Meet me at the Towne Center Cineplex at seven o’clock this Friday night. You won’t regret it.”

  “Wait! How will I know it’s you?”

  “You will. Trust me.”

  “Who were you just talking to, Dear?” Her mother was cutting up leftover meat for the night’s roast beef hash. “Your father told me you were on the phone.”

  She shrugged. “A guy I know. It’s no big deal.”

  Eleanor’s face looked hopeful. “Wilbert?”

  “No. Someone else. Sorry to disappoint you.”

  “Well, as long as you’re having a good time. You’re only young once, and the decision you make as to whom to spend the rest of your time on earth with is the most important one of your life. Besides accepting the Lord, that is.” She placed the chopped meat in a container and handed it to Joelle with a wordless motion for her to find a place for it in the refrigerator. She swept the floor as Joelle moved dishes aside and slid the container of beef in between canned sodas and Jell-O.

  “Have a cup of tea?” her mother offered.

  “Not right now, thanks.”

  Joelle’s mother took a seat at the kitchen table. “Talk for a minute, then?”

  Joelle smiled. “Of course.” She sat beside Eleanor. “You have a serious look on your face. Am I in trouble?”

  “Anything but.” Her mom chuckled. “I don’t know if we ever told you this, Joelle, but your father and I are so proud of you.”

  “Proud of me?”

  “For accepting the altar call this past fall and for trying to live a better life ever since.”

  “Thanks. Is the change that obvious?”

  Eleanor laughed. “You’re a lot more relaxed and pleasant to be around. Plus, I know you’ve been reading your Bible a lot more.” She bent an eyebrow. “Not to mention, we have been seeing a parade of different men lately. I’m happy to say that none of them seems to be the least bit like Dustin.”

  “They’re not like him at all, Mom. They’re Christians.”

  “Quite a difference, isn’t it?” Eleanor didn’t wait for Joelle to answer. A knowing smile crossed her features. “I might as well tell you this. Ever since you accepted the Lord and broke off with Dustin, I’ve been praying that you’d find someone. Specifi
cally, the man the Lord has in mind for you.”

  “Mom! It’s not like I’m desperate!”

  “A beautiful girl like you? You could never be desperate. It’s just that I know you miss Dustin, even if he was awful to you.”

  “He wasn’t so awful, really.” Joelle averted her eyes all the same.

  “Don’t try to fool me. I know better. I also know enough about the world to realize that most of us women miss any relationship with a man, even a bad one, once it’s gone. I don’t want you going back to that. It’s high time the Lord showed you the man He wants you to be with.”

  She lifted her face. “I can’t say we disagree on that.” Joelle nodded. “I’ve been praying about the new directions my life is taking, and I keep getting the strong feeling it’s time to connect with the man I’ll eventually marry. You know, I’d think with all the changes I’m making, bringing romance into the mix is the last thing anyone would suggest. Isn’t that ironic?”

  “The Lord’s plans don’t always seem to follow logic,” her mother counseled. “And they certainly don’t go by what makes sense by the standards of the world. You’re wise to stay with how you think He’s guiding you. I’ll keep praying.”

  Ready to turn the conversation to a light vein, Joelle shook her head in mock derision. “So what’s the matter? Are you tired of having me around?”

  “Never. I dread the day you leave this house, but I get a sense that it’s time. Accepting the altar call was the first step of the rest of your life. I can’t pretend I understand why you and I both get the feeling the Lord’s plans for you involve a man, but He knows best. I realize you turned down a lot of dates when you were committed to Dustin. I’m glad that’s no longer the case.”

  Joelle tried not to cringe. She still didn’t have the courage to tell her mother she was meeting men through the personals, even if they were in a Christian magazine. “I have to admit, it’s been an adventure. You know how it used to be. I’d just hang out with a bunch of friends, and we’d all do things as a group. Dustin and I just drifted together.” Joelle remembered their long courtship. “Other than the junior and senior proms, I’m not sure we even had what you’d call a real date.”

  “I’m not even sure I’d call that a date.” Joelle’s mother shook her head. “All that money I spent on that evening dress, just so you could go to the prom for a half hour and then go to Dustin’s and watch TV the rest of the night. What a waste.”

  “I know. All that fanfare and not much fun.” She patted her mom on the shoulder. “I promise the next time I go to a prom, I’ll buy my own dress.”

  “Thanks a lot.” Eleanor chuckled. “Of course, the last thing your father and I want for you is to get back together with Dustin, but don’t you miss some of your old girlfriends? I liked Tory and Nina.”

  Joelle allowed her lips to curl into a thin smile. The girlfriends she spoke of were good at putting on virtuous fronts but were out for nothing but trouble when no one else was around. Too interested in having a good time to settle down, they hadn’t changed much since high school.

  “Maybe you could invite them over sometime?”

  “No, Mom. But thanks for the offer.” Joelle had no desire to renew those friendships. “I don’t have much in common with them anymore. If I called them or suggested we get together, they’d only try to convince me I should go back to Dustin. There’s no way I could ever consider that. He was never honest with me.”

  “Then you’re smart for not trying. You can never have a good, solid relationship with a man who’s less than honest with you. That’s one of the secrets to your father’s and my marriage. We’re always honest with each other.” She smiled. “Although we do try to be tactful and not hurt each other’s feelings.”

  A surge of guilt shot through Joelle. She knew someone she hadn’t been honest with lately. That was the one thing that held their friendship together when all else seemed to fall apart. “I just remembered, Mom. I have a phone call to make.”

  Ignoring her mother’s quizzical look, Joelle made a beeline for the privacy of her room. She dialed Dean’s number from memory, her heart rapidly beating all the while.

  The line was busy.

  Who could he be talking to?

  Fifteen

  Running his fingers through still-wet hair, newly showered Dean plopped into the easy chair in front of the TV. Years ago his mother had bought the chair by redeeming a large number of S & H Green Stamps. He had affectionately dubbed the chair “The Throne.” As far as Dean knew, Green Stamps were a relic of the past, much like the turquoise vinyl of The Throne’s original upholstery. The vinyl, which had been chilly in winter and stuck to his legs in hot weather, was now covered by a heavy-duty, knotty brown fabric that reminded Dean of indoor-outdoor carpet, except that it was slightly less scratchy.

  His parents had replaced their living room furniture with a matching couch and chair in medium blue with a floral pattern. Mandy had asked for their couch, and Dean had gladly taken the cast-off chair. So what if it didn’t match the mauve sofa he’d bought on sale when a local furniture dealer went out of business? Later, when he sprang for lamps, the rose-colored pair with floral shades had appeared as though they’d be perfect counterparts for the sofa. Only after he got home and discovered they looked too pink did he realize the lamps were a final sale and he couldn’t take them back. No wonder they’d only cost forty dollars each, when they were originally marked two hundred dollars. Figuring that’s what he got for being greedy, he set the lamps on two inexpensive end tables he’d spent a weekend assembling. As for the lamps, he resolved to be thankful for the light they cast.

  At that moment, the sun broke through the clouds, shining unforgiving light through the picture window. His attention momentarily drawn to the window, Dean could almost count the squares in the loosely woven blue-and-green draperies, obviously a product of a discount store, that the landlord had left as part of the decor. The transparent curtains almost matched the teal blue walls.

  In the meantime, Dean tried to ignore the fact that his living room looked like the revenge of a scorned interior decorator. He hoped one day his future wife would take pride in outfitting a house they could call their own. For now, the hodgepodge of furniture he owned was good enough for a bachelor.

  Dean pulled up the footrest of the knotty brown chair and settled into comfort. He deserved to rest. His three-mile run had been a good one. No one else had been running or walking on the track that day. Without distractions of other joggers, he was able to think of nothing for awhile, letting his mind go blank except for keeping count of how many laps he completed. Hiding behind thin cloud cover, the sun didn’t beat down upon his back with any intensity. His moving legs stirred the air enough to keep him from overheating. Only after he stopped was Dean aware of how much he’d been sweating.

  Now smelling of soap and deodorant and wearing athletic shorts and a T-shirt, Dean gulped a tall glass of cool water. He mindlessly pushed the buttons on the TV remote. Baseball season, a time when he pitched on Sunday afternoons for the church team, was over. Autumn’s volleyball season had not yet begun. Sunday Night Bible Study for Young Adults would resume soon, meaning Dean could fill empty Sunday afternoons preparing for the class.

  In the meantime, the hours stretched out endlessly before him, an unwelcome break from his business. He knew it was wrong to feel that way. The Sabbath was a gift from the Lord. A time to renew and replenish oneself. A time to rest so facing the workweek would be less tiring. Dean somehow felt Sunday afternoons shouldn’t be spent alone.

  At least Zach had called and let him know how things were going with Eagle and Raven. As expected, Eagle had been sullen as he boarded the plane and made no secret of his desire to return to the West Coast.

  Zach had been more optimistic about Raven. He had asked Zach a few questions about his own faith and how it affected his life. Dean was grateful to hear those encouraging words.

  Dean was about to suggest to Zach that they get to
gether for a pickup game of basketball at the school gym when his friend mentioned he had a full afternoon ahead of him studying for a college exam. After Zach hung up, Dean felt lonelier than ever.

  If only he could make up some excuse to call Joelle. A year ago, he would have thought nothing of picking up the phone and asking her to share a malt with him at one of the local haunts. Though she’d usually be groggy from her Saturday night adventures, she never turned him down, but things had changed. She had made it clear she was looking for a man to share her life with. Why else would she persist in looking through the personals?

  Dean had been keeping Joelle in his prayers all his life, but he had been especially vigilant since she accepted Christ. In his heart, he knew he had always loved her. When he first came to that realization, they were in high school. Dean remembered feeling jealous that Joelle was becoming too attached to Dustin. He tried to convince himself his concern was only that of a close friend. No one could deny Dustin was a bad influence, yet Dean knew he really wanted Joelle for himself.

  He had spent time alone in his room, praying about whether or not to speak up and make his feelings known to her. No matter how much he argued with God, His answer had clearly been “no.” Even Joelle’s steady church attendance wasn’t enough. She freely admitted to him that she went mainly to appease her parents. Otherwise, Joelle hadn’t bothered to put on a show of living a life pleasing to the Lord. The pain in Dean’s heart was great. Going against the Lord to pursue an unequally yoked relationship would have been wrong. At best, a brief romance would have cost their friendship. At worst, Joelle would have influenced him to take up some of her bad habits. Then they both would have been swimming upstream to get out of Satan’s snare—if they ever could.

  In the meantime, Dean was grateful that the Lord hadn’t led him to dissolve their friendship. Sometimes being Joelle’s friend was agonizing. Each time Dustin got in trouble with his parents, the law, or both, she came crying to him. Each time Dustin betrayed her, Joelle would ask Dean’s advice, only to abandon it as soon as Dustin pleaded with her to forgive him. When Joelle’s “friends” abandoned her, Dean’s shoulder was there for her to shed her tears. Not once did Dean let Joelle down. Not even now, when she had gotten it in her head that she should go off on a wild goose chase, looking through a circular for dates.