Leif pressed his face into my hair and tried to shush me. He was petting my head and murmuring to me, trying to comfort me. I tried to concentrate on his hand on my head but my arm was pulsing in pain and couldn't be ignored.
To try to take my mind off of my arm, I looked around for Gavin and the others. They were all pinned down on the ground. Leigha was snarling at the guard that was sitting on her back, holding her body down. Gavin and Austin were simply cursing vividly. Leif was stuck trying to protect me in the shadows, and I was useless. We had lost. It was that fast. It was over.
Leif, taking in the reality of the scene as well, pulled me closer into his body and whispered so silently in my ear that I knew no one else had heard him. He said, "Use your gift."
I knew what gift he meant, but I was afraid. Every time I had used the gift of energy I had hurt someone, myself included. There were so many people here that I didn't want to hurt.
"No, I can't control it," I whispered brokenly.
"You have to, Sunny." He pulled my face up to his. He pressed his nose to mine and looked into my eyes. "You can do this." I wanted to drown in his eyes right then. They were warm and beautiful. I realized in that moment I would do anything for him. I nodded once at him. I closed my eyes to try to steady myself then raised my arms to focus the energy, only pain shot through me, so unexpectedly that I yelped out.
My arm was useless. I cradled it against my stomach to try to stop the hot pain. I looked back at Leif. His face was grim and tight and fearful. It was the fear that threw me. Without any warning, he quickly and almost without thought put one hand on my back and one hand on the front of my shoulder and jerked my arm viciously back into place.
There was a sickening, shuddering pop then pain. I gasped with it, but surprisingly, after the initial stabbing fire, my arm actually felt better. Not good as new, but better.
"Now, Sunny! You need to use your gift now!" He didn't give me time to focus on my arm or test it out. In fact, the desperate urgency in his voice spurred me to action. I again closed my eyes, raised my arms to the ceiling with only a very real twinge of pain, and pulled energy to me. I pulled it directly inside of me. I continued to pull and pull until my body felt tight and full until I couldn't pull anymore in without fear of bursting open. I could feel the energy zipping around through my body. It was snapping and crackling. There was a loud buzzing sound vibrating out of me, muting out all other noise. It was overwhelming it was so loud.
I opened my eyes and realized happily that I finally had a color. I was outlined in a bright white aura, with ribbons of light blue and silver. Too bad I didn't have time to enjoy it. I dropped the shadows from my body as I stood up. I had everyone's instant attention. Everyone stilled and watched as I came out of the shadows awash in light.
I looked at the one Shadow Guard who was holding Leigha down. He was being purposefully rough with her. He had his hand on the back of her head, pressing it down on the floor painfully. I could see the sheen of unshed tears glistening in her eyes. Her face was a mask of anger, humiliation, and pain.
The tears alone from such a strong woman made me hot with anger on her behalf. I focused directly on that guard. I raised my arms and hands up and pushed energy out of me through the palms of my hands at him. The energy was the base of my color. It flew across the air in a river of white and hit the guard like a wave in the chest, strong and sure.
I watched almost unemotionally as he was pushed up, thrown into the air and against the brick wall, chest first, with enough force that several bricks broke out of their line and fell to floor with the guard. He lay crumpled on the ground, unmoving, covered in a layer of brick dusk and rocks.
Aiden moved into my line of sight, arms up in his own show of peace now. I couldn't hear what he was saying. The buzzing in my head was too loud. I had asked him for his help once. It was too late now. I wouldn't do it again. I pushed him aside, turned away from him and focused on the three guards holding Gavin and the three holding Austin.
"Gavin, Austin, don't move." I could hear myself over the buzzing of the energy. The words came out of my mouth, but it was not my voice. It was dark and gravelly and hoarse, with a faint echo.
I watched as Gavin and Austin flattened themselves down against the floor and covered their heads with their arms. They had no confidence in me and my gift. I couldn't be upset with them. I didn't have much confidence either. There just wasn't any other choice or room for fear at this point.
I focused all my attention on the guards and pushed. I watched as the light flew across the room, caressed harmlessly over the bodies of Gavin and Austin, and blasted all six guards at once. They were thrown as before, but because there were so many, they tumbled together in the air, crashing into the hallway walls and to the floor in a heap.
I then turned my attention to Aiden. He looked nervous. Good. I could see his lips moving, but still I was not able to hear him. I said to him, in my creepy power-filled voice, "You lose."
I pushed a short pulse of energy at him. I wanted to knock him out, but I didn't want to do anything permanent to him. He hit the wall hard. I watched as his head snapped back and into the red bricks. His eyes rolled back into his head and he was out.
I turned to Leif. He had stood with me the entire time, silently guarding my back. I pointed to Aiden and said, "He comes with us. Secure him." Without another word, I walked down the hall. Since I was still aglow with my color, I could see just fine in the dark, as my color illuminated the way.
I didn't know if anyone followed behind me or not. All I knew was that I had to let loose the rest of the energy I had inside of me, and I didn't want anyone else hurt in the process in case I lost what little control I had. I went down the stairs, through the ground floor, and outside into the night. I couldn't chance any regular humans seeing me this way so I phased into the shadows. I made my way up to our clearing. It was a lovely fall night. The air was crisp. The sky was so clear, I could see millions of stars winking at me in the inky darkness.
I raised my arms to the sky and pushed all the energy I had inside me out. I felt the power, the electricity, as it pulsed and shivered out of my body in waves. It was too much and it hurt. It was an unexpected slicing pain. It felt like glass tearing me apart inside as it was pushed out. There was no stopping the energy or the pain that came with it at this point. I screamed and screamed as a bright shower of white rained up into the night.
As the energy drained away from me, so did my strength. The buzzing in my head slowly ebbed as the energy drained and emptied from by body, but the buzz was soon replaced by the hollow sound of wind.
I dropped the shadows and phased back into the light. My legs were suddenly weak. I fell down to my knees on the cold frosted grass. I felt moisture on my face and reached up a weak hand to swipe across my face, only to see the red copper colored blood smeared across my fingers. My nose was bleeding. Lovely. Why not?
My head was throbbing and pulsing. The darkness was creeping in around my vision and I felt dizzy and fuzzy. I could hear my heart pounding steadily. I tried to concentrate on the rhythmic thump, but I was losing consciousness. I sprawled out on the frozen ground, my cheek cold against the crisp grass. I closed my eyes, and gave into the dark, suddenly feeling so very alone.
Chapter Fifteen
Decisions
I was cold. Frozen cold. My head hurt ferociously. I kept my eyes closed for a moment to try to get my bearings. I didn't know how long I was out. All I knew was that I was still lying on the icy grass in the clearing by the cross.
I became aware of the sound of feet hitting the ground. Someone was running towards me. I hurt too much to care at that moment. I lay on the grass surrounded by the thumping in my head. Then without warning, I was jarred up off the ground and wrapped up in a familiar tight embrace. "Ow, geez! My head!"
"Why did you run off like that?"
I didn't care that he was yelling. I was thankful it was Leif. I don't think I could have hurt an ant at that point, I
was so weak and my head hurt so badly. "Leif, I'm cold. Please take me home."
He finally let loose long enough to run his eyes over me. He smiled at me and shook his head once. At least he was calming down. "You can't go home like that. You're a mess."
"Thanks a lot," I mumbled.
He looked at his watch and said, "We have time. I'll take you back to the Inn. You can clean up there before I let your parents see you."
Leif helped me to my feet. Sadly, my legs were too wobbly. They would not hold me up and I ended up sagging against him weakly. "I'm sorry," I said feeling shame wash through me. Then I promptly started to cry. I don't know why. Maybe everyone was right, maybe I was just weak and useless.
I was so tired. My head hurt, and I felt so lost and empty inside. I didn't know where all the emotion was coming from. All I can say is, it was there, and it was impressive. Leif, God love him, lifted me up, cradling me in his arms and walked us down the hill. It didn't take me long to pull myself together and to feel a little silly.
"You can put me down now. I think I'm okay," I said.
Leif immediately stopped and set me carefully on my feet. My legs, although still weak, held me this time. We stood there for a moment to make sure I was good then he took my hand into his and we slowly walked into town to where I had parked my car.
Leif drove us over to the Inn where I jumped into the shower, more to warm up than to get clean. Then I pulled on my jeans and t-shirt. My sweatshirt was a lost cause. It was covered in mud, dirt, and blood, so I borrowed a blue hoodie from Leif. This would make two that I had swiped from him. My makeup was washed away in the shower, so my lovely bruised face was quite noticeable, but otherwise I was good to go.
"What did you do with Aiden?" I asked as I was putting on my shoes.
"The others took him back to Acadia where he will be held."
"What does that mean, held? You don't do torture or anything do you?" I was only half kidding. But then I watched as his eyes closed down and he looked away from me. "Leif, you aren't going to torture him, are you?" I didn't want that to happen. I just wanted him out of my hair so he would stop stalking me and hounding me and popping up everywhere.
"He will not be tortured," he said, but he didn't look at me when he said it.
"Leif, look at me. I don't want him hurt. That's not why I said to hold him. I don't want that on my conscience."
"We don't need anything from him. He will not be hurt. Sunny..." He finally looked directly at me. "I am not saying we haven't in the past, but I give you my word, he will not be harmed."
I left it at that. I had no other choice but to believe him. "So now what do we do?"
"You need to come to Acadia."
Raising an eyebrow at him, I asked, "Are you retrieving me or are you asking me?" There are times in life when I guess you just needed to face facts, and I think that moment was one of those times. I needed to know who and what I was, not just to Acadia, but also to Leif, and myself most of all.
Leif sat back down next to me on the bed, took my hands into his and said, "I am asking you. This is your choice, Sunny. I think you need to realize this is not just going to go away because you want it to. Whether you come to Acadia or not, you are the Queen. If you come with me to Acadia, we, I will do all I can to keep you safe and to see you where you belong."
"What if this is where I belong? What if I don't want to be queen? What if I just want to be me? Is that really so bad?"
Leif just smiled at me. "But you are the Queen. You are the rightful Ruler of Acadia. You can't change that. It's who you are. Once King Gideon realizes that Aiden has failed, he will send others. You have to know this. I wish there was time for you to grow and train and what ever it is you need right now, but there isn't. You are going to have to make a choice. Come with me to Acadia. Sunny, we need you. Your people need you."
No, it was not who I was, it was what I was. There is a difference. Why didn't anyone from Acadia seem to realize that? Maybe I didn't know the difference myself anymore. What did it really matter anyway?
"I'm afraid."
"Why? I will be with you always. I won't let anything happen to you." He looked almost insulted.
How do you explain why you are afraid? I was afraid of what I would become, afraid of my powers, afraid of the unknown. I was afraid of the change. "How? How do I just leave my home? Leave my mom and dad. What about school?" I know all this seemed trivial to Leif. He didn't understand having a family like mine. He didn't understand how I felt.
"It's not forever, Sunny."
I shook my head. Acadia was like a dream to me. It wasn't real. I didn't know the people or the kingdom. How was I supposed to help them? "How do you know it's not forever?"
"I just know."
There Leif sat, next to me on the bed, still grasping my hand and all I could think was that it didn't matter that I was afraid of what would happen, or what would become of me. Did I feel as if I was meant for a greater purpose? No, not really. But beyond all the fear, beyond all the doubt, was a little kernel of excitement. A small bit of wonder.
"Okay, I'll go." Leif started to jump up in excitement. "But not yet! I am not just disappearing into the night. We need to figure out how to do this so that my family doesn't suffer for it. I don't want them hurt."
"We'll figure this out, Sunny. We will do this, you and I together."
Epilogue
"Happy birthday, Sunny!" my mom sang brightly, waking me up as she came into my room on December thirteenth. She had my favorite, strawberry waffles with syrup on the side so they didn't get all mushy, on a tray for my yearly breakfast in bed. I felt a sad twinge now that I knew that this was not actually my birthday.
I didn't show it though. "Thanks!"
I sat up excitedly and waited for my present, greedy as I was. I always get a present first thing in the morning. My mom placed my tray on my lap then she wiped her hands on the front of her pants, as if she was nervous. "We have your present downstairs this year. I do have something for you now, though. I placed it next to your plate. Come down when you're ready." She then turned and walked out of my room. This was starting out to be a strange day.
I lifted up the folded piece of paper from next to my plate and opened it. It was just a single worn sheet of square ivory white paper. The edges were bent and browned from age. It said simply: watch the shadows. keep her safe.
I didn't need to ask what it was. This was the letter left in the basket with me when I was a baby. My mom had found it for me as she said she would. Funny, the letter made sense to me. I doubt if it did to my mom and dad though. Who knows what they thought it meant. I folded it back up and set it gently aside on my nightstand then ate my birthday breakfast, thinking.
Everything had been quiet since Thanksgiving night in November. Time had passed, and my life and schedule had resumed to school and Leif. I didn't train all that much now, though. It had taken me a good week just to feel up to it. Leif was being careful and taking it easy on me.
I asked him once how he knew where to find me that night, and he said that he had seen the light shower in the sky from where I released the energy from my body. I hadn't told him about that night on the hill. I didn't tell him about the pain, or the complete drain it had been on my body or the fear I now had of that very gift. It was so strong. It was so much power. I don't know why I hid it from him. I just didn't want him to know. It felt like a weakness. Here I had this wonderful, special gift, and I was afraid of it. I guess shadow gifts are a private matter after all.
Gavin, Austin, and Leigha had not come back yet from Acadia. Leif didn't know when or if they would come back at all. Everyone it seemed was just waiting for me. I needed to decide what to do. The problem was, I wanted everything to just stay as it was even though I knew it couldn't.
After I finished eating, I went downstairs, my decision finally made. "Hey," I said. My mom and dad were both sitting in the kitchen at the table with their morning cups of coffee.
"Happy
birthday, little girl," my dad said tentatively.
Today felt like the right time. I sat down at the table with them and then said, "I want to tell you a story about a kingdom named Acadia..."
Shadow Warrior
Chapter One
Preparing
"Mom, we have been through this. It's only ten days." My mom and I were at it again. The same fight we had been having for the past month. Spring break had finally arrived and would officially begin the next day, and that was the day that Leif and I had decided to make my first trip to Acadia. It was the perfect time to go. I was thinking of it as a much needed vacation. It was a chance to pop into Acadia, have a look around, and come home. Do the whole meet and greet thing. The how we were getting there was still a mystery, but I would figure it out soon enough, or as soon as Leif told me.
My mom, well she was not real keen on the whole idea. In fact, you could say that my mom and dad weren't too happy with the whole shadow walking thing at all, which means, they were pretending there was no such thing. I could try and bring it up, try to get them to understand, but they just changed the subject every time and stayed in their nice, safe reality. I understood, really I did. It was just a bit annoying.
"You are not going, and that's final."
"Mom," I said, sighing the word. "How do you plan on stopping me? You know this is something I have to do. We've been through this."
"I'm telling you, you're not allowed, that should be enough." She stood there, wringing her hands which made me feel a twinge of guilt. Her brown eyes were upset, and her lips quivered. "Please don't go, Sunny. You won't come back."
I told Leif my parents would be a problem. He never listened. "Of course, I will. I'll come back. This is my home."
"No, you won't. You'll leave to go to that...place, and I'll never see you again."
Shadow Dancer Boxed Set Page 15
