by Lena North
I knew immediately that they'd noticed that the girls, or the horses, were missing. Men were running around, and both Einarr and Jarl Ingolf stood in the center, ready to get up on their horses. I thought things through and quickly decided to change our plans just a little.
"Einarr," I shouted.
"Not now, Sissa," he called back.
"Einarr, listen to me! I saw tracks and Torbi came riding by with no time to stop," I shouted loudly.
That got everyone’s attention, and all movement stilled as they stared at me. Einarr took his foot out of the stirrup and marched up to me. The Jarl was already on his horse, but he moved the horse over to my side as well.
"What has happened?" I asked, but then I continued without letting them ask any questions. "There were fresh tracks from horses leading away from the village. Going south. They seemed strange to me so I'd started to walk back when Torbi came rushing by, and I shouted at him, but he didn't stop. He just shouted back to me that he had to stop them."
I held Einarr's eyes even as I heard the Jarl growling orders to the men to get up on the horses. He looked surprised.
"Torbi was chasing them?" he asked disbelievingly.
"Chasing who?" I countered.
"The girls from the Northern Isles, Sissa. They have run away."
I closed my eyes and thought about my friends. They were out there riding north through the darkness and night would be on them soon. They could very well ride into another ravine, and there were both wolf and bear in the forest. I didn't have to fake my emotions, so I felt tears sting when I opened my eyes again.
"Wait, Ingolf," Einarr called out to his brother. "I have a few questions for Sissa before we leave."
Under the coat, my dress was wet all the way up to my thighs and my shoes were filled with snow. I'd kept somewhat warm as I walked and also too focused on getting back to the village to think much about it. Standing still hurt so I shivered, but I clenched my teeth. The longer I could keep Einarr standing there, talking to me, the more time Torbi and the girls would have to get away.
"Are you okay," Einarr asked, looking keenly at me.
"I don't understand," I replied. "Have Morag, Catriona and Nessa left? How?"
"They stole horses and left. We don't know when, although it seems that it wasn't so long ago so we'll find them soon." He held my gaze, and his eyes grew harder. "We didn't notice that Torbi left, but you met him, you said?"
"Yes. I was walking back and he -"
"I know what you said, Sissa. But why would he rush after them? He should have -" Einarr interrupted me, but I interrupted him right back.
"Einarr," I said pleadingly. "Torbi was in love with Nessa. Please understand his side in this. He would try to find them and bring them back before anyone noticed. He would try to keep her safe."
"Hm," he said. I wasn't sure he believed me, and my knees started to shake. Then I made one more try. I was getting desperate so even though I kept my voice low it was also angry.
"Maybe you've never been young and in love, Einarr, and you are hard as flint, so maybe you don't have it in you to understand. My brother is very, very different from you, and he's an honorable man. The kind of man who would do anything in his powers to save his loved one. Even if it meant risking punishment from the likes of you."
He leaned toward me, but I held my ground and kept my back straight as I glared at him. My words had been true even though I had meant that he saved his loved one from being a captive, not from being punished for stealing a horse. Then Einarr suddenly laughed.
"I've said it before... you are an unusual girl, Sissa," he said quietly. Then he noticed how I shivered, and he frowned. "You seem cold?"
"No, not really," I lied. "I am worried about my brother, though. I want to go home, talk to my parents."
"I'll take you," Josteinn suddenly said. I jerked and there he was, standing next to me. I wondered how long he'd been there.
"You're not coming with us to search for the girls?" the Jarl barked.
"No, uncle. You need to leave immediately, and you need to ride fast. I have been cutting timber the whole afternoon, so I'm tired. I'd slow you down," Josteinn answered calmly.
I thought I heard Einarr snort something out under his breath, but then he suddenly clapped his son on the shoulder, and a look passed between them.
"Let's go," the Jarl bellowed, and without any further discussions, they all left.
By then I could almost not feel my feet and the spots where the wet skirt touched my thighs were burning. I knew that I had to get warm quickly, so I turned and started to walk. To my horror, I stumbled. It was difficult to move my legs, my feet felt sluggish, and I wondered how I'd manage all the way home without anyone noticing. I would not have gotten this wet and cold simply from picking a few lumps of pine resin, so questions would be asked if they saw what my dress looked like under the cloak. Then I felt a strong arm around my waist, taking some of my weight.
"Of course, you worry, Sissa. Let's get you home to your parents," Josteinn said calmly, steering me towards my home. He let go of me immediately but just knowing that he walked next to me, and would catch me if I stumbled, made it possible for me to walk with at least some sort of resemblance of dignity all the way home.
Chapter Fourteen
Warm, and happy
The door slammed shut, and I sighed with relief when I saw that there was a small glow in the fire pit. I walked over, put a few logs on it, added some dry grass and started to blow softly to start up a fire. Then Josteinn pushed me to the side.
"Go and get dry clothes, Sissa," he said calmly.
"What?" I asked weekly.
"Your clothes are all wet, and your shoes too. Go and change," he said.
He had his back toward me, and he was poking the fire so I couldn't see his face to judge his mood. I was shaking, and my feet throbbed so I decided to not argue with him, and walked the few steps to dig out a dry dress from a small chest we kept in a corner. There was no privacy in our home, and this had never mattered when only the family were around because we were used to seeing each other in various states of undress. Having Josteinn there, somehow taking up more of the small space than my whole family did, was different. I glanced over my shoulder, but Joss still had his back toward me so I turned and quickly stripped out of my wet clothes. Then I used the blanket to rub myself dry.
A log fell in the fireplace, and I looked over my shoulder. Joss was watching me with a hard look on his face, and I froze for a moment but then I pulled the blanket up to cover myself. I couldn't interpret the look on his face, but I knew that I didn't look as good as the free women so I didn't want him to see me. We got enough food to be able to work hard for our Jarl, but not more, and I'd heard the women gossip so I was well aware that my body was bony in a way most men would find unattractive.
We watched each other in silence a long time, and I thought that his face had started to soften when he suddenly sighed softly.
"Get dressed, Sissa," he said.
"Okay," I replied calmly, but all I wanted to do was howl with disappointment. I wasn't sure what I'd wanted him to do, or say. Maybe I should have done something, I thought. The women sometimes talked about catching a man, but I hadn't cared so much about that so I didn't know what it meant. Or how to do it.
When I'd put dry clothes on I hobbled over to the fireplace and sat down. Josteinn looked silently at me, so I waited for him to start asking questions. I didn't know what to tell him and I didn't want to lie.
"Give me your feet," he said.
"Huh?"
"Sissa, your feet. You need to warm them up, so give them to me and I'll do that for you."
"Huh?" I repeated.
He smiled a little but said nothing. Then he bent down, grabbed my feet and lifted them off the floor. I tried to pull them back, embarrassed because they were not exactly clean and because I had no clue what he was attempting to do. He started rubbing them but stopped almost immediately, frowning at me.
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"Sissa... You have to keep your feet warm, you know this. They're almost frozen solid now, and you could lose them."
He bent his head, still rubbing my feet, but after a while, he sighed deeply. Then he put them on his lap, holding them firmly with one hand as he leaned back. With his free hand, he started pulling at his tunic. I stared at him, wondering what he was going to do but too stunned to move. Finally, he lifted the tunic and with a set look on his face he put my feet straight on his warm stomach.
I gasped as he shuddered. Then he lowered his tunic and hugged my feet closely to him. He had a determined look on his face, and his eyes never left me.
"Better?" he whispered after a while.
"Hurts," I whispered back to him because it had started to feel like my feet were being poked with hundreds of needles. It stung and burned, and I tried to pull them away from him, but he held on tightly.
"Good. If it hurts, then it's all good. You have to hold them still, Sissa. It'll pass."
We sat there, looking at each other in silence. Every now and then he shifted my feet a little, to a warmer patch of his belly. Each time he shuddered, but he kept moving them and hugging them. The ache slowly subsided to a dull throb, and I exhaled slowly. His face went soft, and he smiled at me then. One of his hands started to caress my leg, sending tingles down my spine and into my belly.
"I don't want to know, Sissa. Okay?" he murmured suddenly.
"Joss..." I wasn't sure, but I thought that he meant that he didn't want to know where I'd been.
"Sissa, please. We don't talk about it because if we don't, then I have nothing to tell my father," he said calmly. "Or my uncle," he added.
I nodded. Apparently he'd figured out that I'd been lying, and it was a clever move of him to stay completely unaware of what had happened. He wouldn't have to lie then, and I was glad that he'd do that for me.
The door slammed open, and we jolted. Ulf barged into the house, clearly upset about something.
"Torbi?" he called, but when he saw us he stopped and stared. "Sissa?" he asked weakly.
"The girls left. Mags and my friends," I said quickly. "Torbi chased after them to try to stop them."
"What?" he scowled. "Why would he do that?"
I gave him the same explanation I'd given Einarr, and Ulf frowned, though nodding slowly at the same time.
"Thought it was the other one. Not the short and feisty one, the silent one with the eyes," he said thoughtfully. Then he grinned. "The big and plain one? What was he thinking?"
"Nessa is not big, Ulf, she is tall. There's a difference," I snapped.
Ulf looked at Josteinn. A look of male understanding passed between their eyes, and suddenly they both snorted with laughter.
"Sissa," Joss said when they'd calmed down. "You are tall. Nessa is big. There certainly is a difference."
"I wonder if they'll catch up with them," Ulf said.
Before either of us had a chance to reply, my parents walked through the door. I had to do another round of explanations and then we sat there, looking at each other. Mother watched my feet, still held firmly under Joss' tunic, so I started to pull them out, but he held on and turned to my parents.
"Sissa needs new shoes," he said calmly.
"You think we don't know this, Josteinn Einarrsen?" My mother snapped sourly.
"Gudrun," my father said warningly and put a hand on her leg. "Josteinn, we know. The Jarl and his wife know too. Sissa is still walking around in her brother's old shoes," he said tersely.
He had a point, and Josteinn knew it. It was not for my parents to give me new clothes, and they had no means to do it no matter how much they wanted. The Jarl and his wife should provide for me. I was their thrall, working on their land, in their kitchen, so it was their duty.
"I hear you, Raudulf," Josteinn said calmly.
"Obliged," my father replied.
I wondered what Freyja would think if Josteinn suddenly asked her to make sure I had new shoes. I figured she'd be unhappy, to say the least, though that wouldn't be my problem. If it got me better clothes, then I wouldn't protest.
"I'm sorry, Josteinn," my mother said. "It's hard when you want to provide and are unable to, isn't it?" she said, and their eyes met. I thought that it looked like Mother was taunting him somehow but then she smiled gently.
"We don't have much, but if you would like to share our evening meal, then you are welcome. It would give me pleasure to thank you for tending to my daughter's feet this way."
I made a sound of protest. The food we had was horrible compared to what he was used to.
"I would be honored, Gudrun," he replied, and I stared at him. He smiled at me, and then he winked. I hoped that my family would assume my cheeks was red from the warmth of the fire, but when I heard both Ulf and Father chuckle I knew that they didn't.
Then we had dinner together, and it was the best meal I'd had in my life, but also the weirdest. Everyone deliberately avoided difficult topics, so instead the talk was about everyday life in the village, the coming summer, and my father's woodcarving. There were no awkward silences, we laughed a lot, and it was pleasant, but at the same time, it was incredibly weird to have Josteinn at our table. He complimented my mother on the food, eating just enough to be polite but not so much that there wouldn't be sufficient for the rest of us. I could see that he didn't like the thin soup we had or the mushy pieces of old vegetables in it, but I actually thought that it wasn't that bad. Mother was good with herbs and not only for healing so it had a rich aromatic taste and the warmth settled in my belly. At least, it wasn't Nettle-soup, I thought, chuckling to myself.
Through the meal and the good mood, there was also a strange undercurrent, a tenseness that we all tried valiantly to push back, but it was still there. We all worried about Torbi, and it was for different reasons, but the apprehension was anyway thick in the small room.
After dinner, I expected Joss to leave, but he sat down by the fire and talked to my father about wood carving techniques. I was astonished to learn that they had this in common. From the look on my father's face, it was a surprise to him too, but he was pleased. He brought out his tools, and they tried them out on the logs by the fire. I watched as Joss leaned down deeply over the wood, concentrating on what he was doing with a small satisfied smile playing on his lips. Suddenly I wondered about Einarr's ambitions for his son. I wasn't sure anymore if Josteinn shared them or if he had other dreams.
"You're good at this, Josteinn," my father said calmly when they put the tools away.
"I like it," Joss replied just as calmly.
Then the stillness in the house was over. The door slammed open, and both Jarl Ingolf and Einarr walked in. The small room was suddenly crowded. I backed away to stand in the corner, as far away from the men as possible. I could see on their faces that the news they came with wouldn't be good, though I hoped this meant that our plan had worked.
"Raudulf," Jarl Ingolf said, and Father stepped forward.
"Is he dead then?" he asked, calmly.
"We don't know for sure, but we think so," the Jarl replied immediately. "We followed their tracks as far as we could. He had followed the girls as they rode south and they must have spotted him. We think that he caught up with them, but too late. It looks as if they didn't see clearly in the darkness and we believe that they have gone over the edge and into the ravine. It's a steep fall, and the river is wide. They will not have made it if this is where they ended up. We searched, and we saw his cap a while down on a ledge, but there were no signs of them or the horses."
"No," Mother whispered, and her shoulders sagged.
I wanted to scream with joy. Our plan had worked, and they'd seen exactly what we wanted them to see. I closed my eyes, clenching my jaws together because I had to cover my glee. Einarr's eyes were sharp. He would definitely notice if I didn't take great care how I reacted.
"I'm so sorry, Gudrun," Jarl Ingolf whispered. "I know how hard it is to lose a child, and Torbiorn was a good man
."
Of course, Jarl Ingolf would understand what my parents felt.
They didn't stay for long after that, and Josteinn left with them. Before he left, he gave my mother a soft caress on her shoulder and whispered something to her. Then he nodded solemnly at my father and Ulf and walked out the door without even looking at me.
The room was silent when they'd left. Ulf watched the fire with a hard scowl on his face, though I could see how he swallowed again and again. Mother made no sounds, but I saw how she wiped her eyes, and Father just sat there, staring at the wall. I struggled with the knowledge that I could take their pain away, and give them hope. It felt cruel to sit there and watch them grieve for a son they thought was lost when I knew that he was alive. I still knew I couldn't tell. They had to look like they were mourning for Torbi, and if I explained what actually happened, they wouldn't be able to pretend. I consoled myself with the thought that he in a way was lost to them. It was unlikely we'd ever see him again, so it was a little like he was dead, I told myself. I also knew that later, when all of this had blown over, I could tell them.
Chapter Fifteen
Suspicion
The gods must have been on our side because that night they sent Thor across the skies in his wagon and thunders shook the rafters in our home. With him, Thor brought a heavy snowfall. This would disguise the trail we'd made deliberately, but also hide any other tracks that remained. I sighed with relief even though I also worried because the snow would cover the escape but it would mean that traveling north would be even riskier. Torbi and the girls would have to seek shelter somewhere, and they had very little food, and not enough clothes. I hoped that the bad weather would turn south and that they were well on their way.
