“Flor! You’re not saying anything.”
“Oh. . . . I mean . . . why’s he quitting?”
“He hates it. School’s even harder for him than for me. Daddy says that’s because he’s lazy and doesn’t try. Daddy says . . .” Sylvie breaks off, like she’s said more than she meant to. Like there’s still more she’s not supposed to tell. “Anyway. Perry says everybody expects him to mess up. ‘Why disappoint people?’ he says.”
“Perry shouldn’t blame other people for his troubles.” Mama’s voice comes out of Flor’s own mouth. “It’s his fault.”
Sylvie goes quiet. Not comfortable, best-friend kind of quiet. In the background, Flor can hear a barking dog and the honk of a car horn. Sylvie’s outside, under the very same September sky, only now it feels like she’s on another planet, hurtling around a different star. Flor turns the water on, turns it off. Out the window lies Cecilia. She looks just like Mama when Mama was a girl, Lita says.
“My mother said Perry didn’t come home last night.” Sylvie’s voice could fit inside a thimble. “Have you seen him, Flor?”
“No.” What a pathetic word. Flor toes the worn spot Mama’s feet have made in front of the sink. “I’m sorry. I know I promised to look out for him.”
“I bet he broke into a cottage and slept there. He does that.”
“He does?”
“Don’t tell your dad, okay?”
Another secret! Flor concentrates on her lifeless sister. It’s like watching one of those cement lawn-ornament lighthouses Mama sells at the gift shop. Sylvie is saying Perry wants to live someplace he can drive as fast as he wants as far as he can and there’s no water cutting him off from the rest of the world.
On the other side of the window, Flossie swishes her tail. Cecilia’s black hair makes a curtain across her face. A leaf drifts down and lands on her thigh.
“He wants to live where nobody knows who his father is and he can be his own person. Oh, Flor!” Sylvie draws a shaky breath. “He quit school. What next? What if he runs away?”
Runs away! As soon as Sylvie says it, Flor can imagine it. Her heart starts to beat too fast. Going up on her toes, she leans toward the window. Waves of late-afternoon light shimmer around her big sister. Who lies there like a shell. Like her body’s a shell and the real Cele has gone away. Has run away.
“No!” she tells Sylvie. “He won’t. Don’t worry. Teenagers say all kinds of chucklehead things.”
How can anyone lie so still so long? How can anyone be so beautiful? It’s like she’s in a trance. Bewitched. Cecilia and not, at the same time. Flor’s heart thumps.
“It’ll be okay,” she promises Sylvie, but somehow she’s promising herself too. “It’ll be all right.”
“You can’t promise that.”
“Yes, I can! I just did!”
Flossie’s ear, the one with a bite out of it, twitches like danger is near. And now something very peculiar happens. Flor has never seen a genuine dead person, but all of a sudden, she imagines her sister in her coffin. Cecilia ate the poisoned apple, or was bitten by a venomous snake, or inhaled toxic gas. There she lies, beautiful and prim as ever but dead, dead, dead.
“Oh!” Flor cries.
“What?” Sylvie says.
When Flor flings open the kitchen door, Flossie Magruder streaks off into the field. Flor rushes to her sister’s side and kneels down. Cecilia doesn’t move. Her thumb and first finger pinch the stem of a fairy rose.
“Cele,” breathes Flor. “Open your eyes!”
“No,” replies her sister.
And Flor isn’t relieved, exactly, because she knew, in her heart of hearts, didn’t she, that her sister wasn’t really dead. But for one terrifying moment, death was so near, so real, Flor could feel its icy breath and see its clammy hands reaching for Cecilia, greedy to drag her away. Flor swivels her head as if she still might spot the wicked witch, the slithering snake or cloud of black gas. She will chase it down, she will beat it back, she will . . .
Someone gulps in her ear.
“Flor? Are you still there? Are you okay?”
Flor sinks down into the grass.
“Everything’s fine,” she says into the phone. “Don’t worry!”
Cecilia swings her long legs to the ground and stalks away. When Flor collapses onto the lounger, its cushions are still warm from the body of her living, undead sister. Tucking the phone under her chin, she picks up the rose and starts pulling off petals.
“I know I didn’t keep my first promise. But now . . .”
“It’s not your fault,” says Sylvie. “I need to come home! I begged my mother, at least for the weekend, but she says I have to stay and get used to it.”
Get used to it! How can adults say these heartless things? “Get used to it” belongs in the same infuriating category as “Life isn’t fair” and “Someday you’ll laugh over this.” A horrifying thing must happen to your brain as you age. It must grow tough and rubbery, like an old pork chop forgotten in the back of the refrigerator.
She and Sylvie try to formulate a plan. Running away. A hunger strike. Maybe Sylvie could do some criminal activity and get expelled.
The backyard gives way to a field, and the field runs downhill to the lake. By now the sun’s low in the sky, and if Flor stays here much longer, it will sink and melt into the water. In the tall grass, a few crickets are already chirping, that slow, mournful, end-of-summer chirp, and now Flor feels worn-out. Her sister isn’t dead, but she has disappeared. The odds of Sylvie running away, or refusing to eat, or spray-painting curse words on the side of a building, or rebelling in any helpful, useful way are a million to one.
“It’s okay,” Sylvie says. “Talking to you makes everything better.”
“How can it? Nothing’s changed.”
“I know.” Her voice is much too calm. Peculiarly calm. “But it’s okay.”
Flor tries to argue this makes zero sense. It’s the kind of thing grown-ups say when they’re sick of a subject. At this rate, Sylvie will either spend the year in abject misery or she will get used to it there, and which is worse?
“Flor, don’t tell anyone what I said about my father and Perry.”
“Who would I tell? Are you forgetting I have no friends?”
The breeze scatters the rose petals Flor tore to smithereens. Sylvie sighs and hangs up.
Inside the house, a miracle has occurred. Thomas is doing his homework, though no one stands over him with a whip. He points to his paper.
“Look. The word bed looks like what it is.”
He’s right.
“How come all words aren’t like that?” Tiny candles of discovery light his eyes. “It’d be so much better! It’d make more sense.”
“I’ve got news. Life doesn’t always make sense.”
Poof. The candles go out. Thomas looks crushed. Aargh! What made her say a mean thing like that? Even if it’s true? She might as well be an adult! Disgusted with herself and pretty much the universe, Flor stomps around the house, which is definitely empty. No Cecilia. No Cecilia anywhere she looks.
Tonight she sends Sylvie an email suggesting they research the symptoms of highly contagious diseases. Sylvie doesn’t answer.
Chapter Eight
Every Saturday afternoon, Dad takes shooting practice at the targets behind the VFW. He likes to keep his shooting skills sharp, just in case an escaped convict hops the ferry and holds the island hostage. After Dad does his meticulous gun-cleaning ritual, he locks his revolver away again till next Saturday.
Today his brain slips some essential gear. He suggests Thomas come target shooting with him. Thomas, of course, goes out of his minimind with excitement.
What is Dad thinking?
Mama is a monument of indignation.
Thomas is six years old! He can’t even tie his own shoes! When Dad replies he learned to shoot at that age, like most island boys do, and did she ever consider she babies that boy too much, Mama brings up her Cleveland cousin who got s
hot, a terrible story that always makes her cry.
It’s downhill from there.
Flor is upstairs on the landing, guarding the phone, waiting for Sylvie to call. Thomas crouches beside her, shooting his finger between the spindles of the banister. Cecilia? Maybe she’s in her room. Maybe she’s gone. Basically these days it’s the same thing.
Mama says, “You always . . .” and “You never . . .” Dad dwindles. Sunlight tumbles through the landing window and tries to tickle Flor’s feet. The day is pretending nothing’s wrong. Look at me, it says. I’m all about sunshine and happiness!
Not here. Not in this house.
“Bang!” Thomas whispers. “Bang!” But after firing off a few more rounds, he lets his arm fall to his side.
“Never mind.” He leans over the banister. “I don’t want to go anyway. It’s not worth it.”
A pause. Both parents look up, and for about three seconds they both look sorry. Even a little ashamed. For three seconds, they could be TV parents, who realize the error of their ways, and order in pizza, and start holding family meetings where every opinion matters, and here comes the happy ending, lifting you on its wings.
For three seconds.
“Go out and play, you two,” Dad says then. “We’ll settle this. It’s not your business.”
Even Thomas recognizes this for the insult it is. He balls his fists. He puffs his cheeks. As if they’re babies! As if they don’t notice, or will forget, the things that get said around here. As if how their parents hurt each other is not their business?
Flor grips the phone, which refuses to ring. If only Sylvie still lived here, Flor could escape to her house now. If only Cecilia hadn’t disowned them, Flor wouldn’t be on her own now. Lonesomeness chokes her insides like a garden full of weeds.
“Go on!” Mama shoos her hands. “You heard your father.”
“No!” Flor’s had it. She shoos her hands back. “It is our business. We live here. This is our house as much as yours!”
“What did I tell you about flipping that lip?” Mama’s hands go to her hips.
“Don’t make her more madder,” Thomas begs.
Too late now. Flor’s had enough. Enough! She’s got no one to turn to except her own self, and if she doesn’t say what’s inside her, something bad will happen. She will wither. Shrivel. Maybe even disappear, wink right out, that’s how it feels. Mama shakes a finger. Flor shakes hers back.
“If we fight we get punished!” The words tear out of her. “You should too!”
Like Flor broke some curse, Cecilia’s door blasts open. She was in there after all!
“Flor’s right!” Cecilia’s eyes and mouth are big. Huge. “We’re sick of you fighting! What’s wrong with you? Why don’t you stop? Do you need professional help? Are you psychotic?”
Dad has started climbing the steps, but he freezes. Cecilia? Cecilia flipping the lip?
“Cele’s right!” cries Flor. “This is all messed up! It’s not how a family’s supposed to be.”
“Everybody’s yelling.” Thomas puts his hands over his ears. “Please stop yelling, please.”
“You don’t just hurt each other! You hurt us too!” Cecilia leans over the railing, pointing, accusing. “Don’t you see that? Or don’t you even care?”
Her sister taking her side turns Flor bold and crazy.
“You’re so selfish!” she shouts. “You should be ashamed!”
“That’s enough!” yells Dad. “Enough out of you both!”
“I hate this!” cries Cecilia. “Hate it! You make me want to run away!”
Run away!
That’s too much for Thomas. He starts to wail. Which makes Flor feel terrible, but there’s no stopping her big mouth.
“No! If they hate each other so much, one of them should go! Just get it over with!”
Thomas wails louder. Even Cecilia looks shocked.
Flor’s clattering down the stairs, stumbling at the bottom, tripping headlong toward the door, and neither parent tries to stop her. Good! Because they can’t. She spoke the truth and she feels terrific. Terrific! She grabs her backpack from the hook and bangs out into the too-bright, too-cheerful sunshine. It’s so bright, for a moment she’s blind.
That’s when she realizes she’s still holding the cordless phone. Which hasn’t rung, like it’s frightened too. No way is Flor going back into that house. She shoves the phone into her backpack, grabs her bike, and jumps on.
“Flor! Stay! Stay!” Her brother’s in the yard. His thin voice chases her down the road.
Chapter Nine
Flor digs her toes into the rim of the old quarry. Her heart’s a circus, with trapezes and tightropes and people shooting out of cannons but no nets—someone forgot the nets. She can still hear Thomas begging her to stay. And Cecilia threatening to run away. Loudest of all is her own voice, saying “One of them should go, go, go. . . .”
Usually, riding her bike till she nearly has a heart attack calms her down, but not today. Today everything’s different. Even Moonpenny Quarry. It quivers in the sunshine, rays of light bouncing off the rocks or getting sucked into the dense, scrubby junipers. The quarry is supposed to be peaceful, but this afternoon it buzzes with secret energy, crackles with a life all its own. Flor hesitates, but where else can she go?
The loose dirt under her feet gives way, and she grabs the trunk of a tree to keep from falling. The tree’s roots grip the rim for dear life. Nearby, a crumpled, dried-up skin. Shucked off by a snake, that slid away all sleek and new.
Flor’s not sorry for what she said. Not. She presses a hand to her heart, feels it beat beat beat. Not. Not. Not.
Maybe she will be. But not yet.
Hate. She shouldn’t have used that word.
Cecilia said it too.
A familiar bark and squeak turn her around.
Old Violet Tinkiss and her two-legged dog trundle down the road. Violet’s hair is a crazy thundercloud. She barely glances at Flor, but little Minnie, strapped into the doggie-wheelchair contraption Violet built her, smiles her pink-gummed smile. Her useless rear legs flap like extra tails. Digging into her backpack, Flor pulls out one of the dog treats she carries just in case she meets up with Minnie.
“Hey, sweet girl.” She fondles the dog’s long, silky ears. “How you doing, Violet?”
Violet grunts. Her being here is an undeniable sign that summer’s over. During tourist season, Violet lies low, sticking to her dilapidated fishing shack or camping at the abandoned rescue station out on the neck. She mutters and curses, maybe at the lake, where her husband’s ship wrecked fifty years ago, or at the heartless summer person who hit Minnie and left her lying in a ditch, or maybe at the cruel universe in general. Dad’s the only human being she tolerates.
But now she’ll be out and about, like some animal that hibernates in reverse. It’s funny how the island’s crazy person makes Flor feel more normal. She tells herself it’ll be all right. Mama will punish her, but eventually her parents will make up, just like always. Thomas will go back to being annoying. And Cecilia. Clearly she’s had a change of heart. She won’t freeze Flor out, not after this.
It’ll be a while, though, till things calm down back there. She watches Violet and Minnie wheel away, then peg-legs her way down the side of the quarry. Loose stones skitter. A rabbit shoots out from one thorny bush and hides behind another. Flor picks her way around the tumbled rocks to where the cattails whisper among themselves. Parting them, she slips through, steps out onto the edge of the swimming hole.
Stretching out, chin on her fist, she peers into the icy water. The bodies of those drowned lovers still lie down there. On a ledge, Joe Hawkins says. He claims he saw their bones, bleached out and picked clean. The skeletons still have their gnarly arms around each other, locked in eternal frozen embrace. Minnows swim in and out of their eye sockets.
Joe Hawkins! Only someone certified brainless would believe him!
The water ripples, though no one threw a stone. The shadow
of a cloud whisks across the water and brings with it Flor’s bad dream. On a ledge, in the dark.
Maybe things won’t be all right.
Flor gives herself a shake. Stop that right now. She sits up and opens her backpack. The phone. Of course it won’t work out here. Still she presses TALK and holds it to her ear.
“Hello? Hello, Sylvie? Why didn’t you call? I really, really need to talk to you.”
Thank goodness no one can see her.
“You could put shaving cream on your lips and say a rabid squirrel bit you. You could fake the symptoms of malaria. Chills and fever.”
No reply. Flor puts the phone away and stretches out on the refrigerator rock. She opens her library book. Moonpenny Public Library is in the basement of the school, and the comforting smell of underground wafts out. After a while, she rests her cheek against the page. A breeze strokes the back of her neck. Quarry quiet. It’s so deep down.
Pock!
Her eyes fly open. Drool glues her cheek to the page. She must have drifted off.
Pock, pock!
Sitting up, rubbing her eyes, Flor knows what that sound is. Dad at the VFW, practicing his shooting. Every single Saturday, come hell or high water.
The sun’s slipped a few notches, and when she stands up, her shadow wears stilts. She has to go home right now. Making Mama madder is the last thing anyone needs. She wipes the drool off her book, shoves it into her pack. She picks up the phone.
“I’m on my way home, Sylvie. In case you’ve been trying and trying to reach me and are worried where I am. I mean, really frantically worried, since you are my best friend and care about me above all other living creatures.”
Her foot has fallen asleep. It’s encased in a block of cement. Dragging it behind her, she stumbles through the cattails, out into the open quarry, and directly into a girl wearing work boots with red laces and a sweatshirt big enough for three more of her to fit inside. Jumping back, the girl swings up a phone and snaps her photo.
Moonpenny Island Page 5
