In my mind, I shouted to them, but no words came out. I couldn’t quite figure out where I was.
Wake up. I yelled at myself, but the fight took every bit of strength I had, and I fell back into the darkness.
* * *
I wasn’t sure how long I had been out but when I woke up, I could hear a soft beeping and feel a soft blanket wrapped around me. A subtle smell of roses lingered in the air, almost overpowered by antiseptic.
I had to be in a hospital.
I thought back to the party. Cooper in the pool shed. I smiled until the memories played out in my head. I left and was walking home and then nothing. I woke up here. What happened to me?
My left hand moved first, squeezing something.
Someone.
A hand.
My chest ached. It felt like I had just been hit by a bus.
Inside, I fought harder than ever before to open my eyes. Finally obeying, my eyes were assaulted by the fluorescent lights, causing me to squint. It took a moment to come into focus. Propped up slightly in a stark white, private room, I guessed I was in a hospital. The nondescript room was free of any pictures or decoration other than a dry-erase board with some scribbling and a wall-mounted television. My eyes looked down to the hand connected to mine.
“Anna,” I breathed. She sat in a chair, asleep, with her head resting on my bed. Her raven black hair piled in a sloppy bun, she wore one of Ashton’s old flannel shirts.
My throat felt like it had been shredded by a cheese grater. Trying to lift my right hand to my throat, I was slightly restricted. Lifting my head, I saw an IV in my hand. My arm, covered in bruises and scrapes, hurt less than my leg that throbbed under the blankets. Looking down, I saw it heavily bandaged.
To my right, a window with the curtains pulled mostly closed, let in a narrow view of the midnight’s sky. On the wall ahead, a round, white clock with large black numbers hung. It was quarter after eleven.
I needed something to drink. I looked left as I again squeezed Anna’s hand. Talking hurt too much; I didn’t want to try that again.
Ashton also slept in a chair, sitting up, with his neck crooked to the side, leaning on the wall near the door. He looked like crap. His face was pale, and his hair looked like he licked an electrical outlet. He had been pulling at it. He did that when he felt stressed.
Mustering all the strength I could, I squeezed and shook Anna’s hand once more.
“Just five more minutes,” she mumbled. Then quickly her head shot up and her tired eyes met mine. “Kinsley,” she cried, tears instantly streamed down her face.
“Drink,” I mouthed, barely audible. “Throat.”
“Let me get the nurse,” she said, releasing my hand and pressing the button on the wired remote next to me. She stood and reached for the cup on my bedside tray table. “Ashton . . . Here, honey.” Anna brought the drink to my lips. “Let me help you,” she said, tipping the cup to allow me to sip the cool water. “Not too much.” She pulled it back. “Ashton, wake up,” she said louder that time.
His eyes blinked open a few times as he straightened his neck. “Anna?” he asked sleepily. His eyes found mine. “Lizzy.”
Ashton jumped out of the chair and pushed past Anna. “Thank God, you’re awake.” He grabbed my hand and bent down to kiss my forehead.
“Can I help you?” a nasally voice asked from the wall.
“We need a nurse, Kinsley’s awake,” Anna answered, wiping the tears away.
“What . . .” I tried to speak but I couldn’t finish, I needed more water. My hand went to my throat. “Drink.”
Ashton picked up the cup of water I had just been sipping from and helped me take a few swallows. Lifting my head up caused significant pain in my chest.
Setting the cup down, Ashton shoved his hand into the side pocket of his khaki cargo shorts. “I have to call your parents. I promised I’d call no matter what time it was.” I looked up at him, my eyebrows pinched together. “I sent them home to get some sleep.”
“How long . . .”
“You’ve been unconscious for three days,” Anna said, taking Ashton’s place as he walked out the door. “I know you wanna know what happened.” She was cut off by the knock on the door, followed by the hottest male nurse I had ever seen walking in.
“Welcome back, Sleeping Beauty,” a nurse in scrubs greeted me with a warm smile. “How are you feeling?” He looked at the monitor next to the bed, pushing buttons until a blood pressure cuff on my arm began to inflate.
“Hurt.” My hand gingerly touched my chest then went to my throat.
“Just so happens, I have pain meds for you.” He produced a tiny, amber vial no larger than the end of my pinkie and two needles, one filled, one empty, from his pocket. “I’ll get you some ice after I give you the pain meds and Zofran for the nausea. You’re going to get morphine and sometimes it can make you sick because it’s so strong. Okay?”
I nodded my head. I didn’t care what he gave me if it took the pain away. The pressure in my chest was unreal. The blood pressure cuff hissed as it finally deflated and the machine beeped.
“I’ll get the ice, I know where the machine is,” Anna offered. “I’ll be right back, honey.” She picked up a small gray pitcher off the bedside table and quietly walked out. She looked as exhausted as I felt.
My eyes watched Nurse McSteamy clicking and scanning things at the computer to the right, near the window. With a headful of fun, sexy curls, his blond hair hung down to his ears, making him look more like a surfer than a nurse. If his arms were any indication of the rest of him, under the scrubs was tanned skin stretched tautly over tone, trim muscles. He looked like he could have been related to Ryan.
Ashton came back in a minute or so after Anna left. Walking to the bedside, Ashton sat down in the armed chair that Anna had been asleep in. “Your parents will be here in about an hour. You scared the shit out of me.”
Our house was about twenty miles from the closest major hospital. One of the only drawbacks of living in the country was the distance from good healthcare.
“Sorry,” I whispered.
“Can you rate your pain for me?” McSteamy asked.
“Bad, like ten,” I gritted.
“Can you tell me your name and date of birth, please?” the nurse asked over his shoulder from the computer.
“Kinsley Allen. December third, nineteen-ninety-five.” My voice sounded so scratchy and hoarse I almost didn’t recognize it. “What’s yours?”
“I’m Eric, I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself earlier, did I? I’m your night nurse. I’ll be with you until seven and then I’ll be back tomorrow. If you’re ready, I’m gonna go ahead and push the medicines.”
I nodded slightly, watching as he injected the clear liquids into the tubing connected to my hand. It didn’t take long before I had a funny taste in my mouth and the pain slowly subsided.
“You should be able to get some rest now.” Eric smiled. “Do you need anything before I go?”
“No . . . I’m good.” The ache in my chest had almost gone. It felt like I was floating.
Floating. A blip of a memory was right there but then gone just as fast. I wished I could remember what had happened.
“I’ll let you rest but if you need anything, just press your button and I’ll come right in,” he assured me with a dashing smile.
“I bet you will,” Ashton grumbled under his breath once Eric was out of earshot. When he looked up from my hand, I gave him the best evil eye I could muster under the circumstances. “What?”
“Be nice.”
“He’s hitting on you; while you’re in a hospital bed, I might add.” Ashton leaned back in the chair and crossed his arms over his chest. He was quiet for a moment. “How’s the pain?”
“Better. My throat still hurts,” I answered, looking from Ashton to the cup of water and back. Ashton leaned over, picked it up and held it out to me.
“You need help?”
“No.” I took the drink
from him in my left hand and slowly brought it to my mouth. The water wasn’t very cold, but it felt good on my angry, raw throat.
With a whoosh, the door flew open and in came Anna with the pitcher that I hoped was filled with ice. “I found you some ice and a spoon. I thought that might make it easier to eat it.”
“Perfect.”
Anna grabbed one of the white Styrofoam cups and spilled ice into it from the larger pitcher. She stepped around Ashton, her chest brushed his back as she handed me the spoon and held out the cup to me.
I couldn’t help but notice how Ashton watched Anna’s every move. Scooping out a few ice cubes, I brought the spoon to my mouth. It wasn’t lost on me that she stood in the tiny space between us that forced her leg to touch his. It looked like some things changed while I was . . . asleep. I was happy to see them . . . getting to know each other or whatever it was they were doing.
“What happened? You said,” I swallowed, “I’ve been out for three days.”
“What’s the last thing you remember?” Anna spoke up first.
“Party. I left after . . .” I looked at Ashton and remembered him finding Cooper and me in the pool shed.
“It’s okay, Kins.” His voice, full of warmth, was soft like a chenille blanket. “I get it.”
The hurt I expected to see wasn’t there. Maybe he had enough time to be mad and get over it while I laid unconscious in a hospital bed.
“I was running home after Cooper . . .” Tears began to fill my eyes, I remembered his latest rejection. The ache returned to my chest as the tears escaped. Not even morphine would alleviate that pain. “That’s the last thing I remember. What happened?”
“We were following you to see if you were okay after you came out of the pool shed. Ashton said he walked in on you and Cooper,” Anna explained as I took the cup of ice from her. I held the ice in my right hand and managed to use the spoon to eat a few more pieces without dropping any.
Interrupting, I looked past Anna to Ashton. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“When you feel better, we’ll sit down and talk about everything, okay?” Ashton stood and stepped to the end of the bed. “Anna, why don’t you sit?”
“Thanks.” She smiled at him. “Where was I? Oh, we were following you to find out what happened. We were almost to the end of the driveway when we heard screeching tires.”
I heard the tires squealing in my mind. Oh my God. Suddenly, I had a memory of smelling burnt rubber.
“A truck,” I said, closing my eyes. “I think it was a truck. I remember a loud engine and the tires . . . I could smell burnt rubber.”
My eyes flew open and I looked down at my broken body. The memories of what happened slammed into me just like the truck did. I couldn’t breathe. I started panicking as I remember the truck hitting me and shooting me through the air.
“I got hit?” I cried, not bothering to wipe away the tears that poured from my burning eyes. “Someone hit me and didn’t even stop?”
“At first, we couldn’t find you because it was so dark. Ashton screamed for help and Ethan, Ryan, Heather, and Cooper came running to help us look for you.” Anna took a breath and wiped away her tears.
“Cooper found you.” Ashton mumbled from the foot of the bed. “It was crazy. We were all walking around with our phone lights and he didn’t even have one, but he called out to you once and then ran right up to you. It was almost like he knew exactly where you were,” Ashton told me.
The tears streamed unrelentingly down my cheeks. “Why? Who would do this?”
As I said the words, I remembered the text messages and I looked to Anna. “Did you . . .”
“I told the cops, Kins. I had to. They think-,”
“I think that’s enough for now,” Ashton interjected, shaking his head slightly.
“What?” I looked back and forth between them. The beeping of the machine sped up just as my breaths did. “What aren’t you telling me?” My whole body trembled in fear.
“Anna, call the nurse,” Ashton said.
“No. Tell. Me.”
“I’m sorry, honey.” Anna pushed the red nurse button on the remote before I could get it away from her. “There will be time later to talk about all of this. Right now, Ashton is right, you need to rest.”
I was scared to ask but had to. “Cooper? Is he . . .”
“He left this morning to go back to Fort Meade, but he will be back tomorrow. He had to fill out some transfer paperwork and get some clothes and stuff,” Ashton told me, but never made eye contact, instead looked at Anna. “I’ll go see what’s keeping the nurse dude.”
“Cooper didn’t leave your side until this morning. Well, except for the surgeries.” Anna got up and sat down on the bed, facing me. My heart felt like it was going to explode out of my chest. “Take a few deep breaths, honey. Everything’s gonna be okay.”
“Surgery? I had surgery?”
“You had two surgeries. One on your chest and one on your leg.” Anna moved the ice cup to the bedside table. “You had internal bleeding, I don’t remember what though, and your leg was broken pretty bad. The doctors said everything would heal though,” she reassured me, but my first thought was about not being able to ride again. Grabbing my free hand, she squeezed it. “You’re gonna be as good as new and they’ll find whoever did this.”
Anna carefully leaned down and rested her forehead on mine. We closed our eyes and cried together. Her warm tears fell from her cheeks to mine, rolling down my face. We didn’t say anything; we didn’t need to. The beeps slowed as I regained my composure and took a few cleansing breaths.
Ashton returned with Eric a few minutes later. Ash walked up to Anna, standing next to my bed, and slid his hand down her back.
“I hear you might be interested in a sleeping pill or something to help you relax?” Eric walked around to the right side of the bed, checking the monitors. I couldn’t help but notice the quick glances that Ashton was stealing of Anna.
“No. I’m okay now. I wanna see my parents.” I did want to see my parents, but I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stay awake another forty-five minutes. I was exhausted.
“Why don’t you close your eyes and rest until they get here? I’ll wake you up,” Ashton promised.
“Fine, but when they get here, you have to swear you’ll take Anna back to my house so she can sleep and then,” I paused, watching Eric pulling a needle from his pocket. “Wait, what’s that?”
“It’s just something to take the edge off. You’ll still be able to wake up in an hour,” he assured me as he injected whatever it was into the IV tubing.
“Okay, but . . .” my eyes drooped then sprung back open. “Ashton . . .”
“I’m here, Kins.” He stood at the end of the bed, but I couldn’t get my head to stop at him; instead it flopped to one side.
“You need to sleep too.” My eyes rolled back into my head, but I fought back. “Promise.”
“Go to sleep, sweetheart,” Ashton told me just as everything faded away.
My last thought as the drugs took over wasn’t seeing my parents. Every thought was consumed by Cooper. He had been there, waiting. That had to mean something.
Right?
SOMETIME AROUND MIDNIGHT MY PARENTS arrived and true to his word, Ashton woke me up. Thanks to the sedative my nurse gave me, I didn’t get a chance to talk with them long before I passed back out.
The next morning when I woke up there were a few doctors in the room talking to my dad, but my mom was absent from the room.
“Dad,” I mumbled.
“Hey. Good morning, Lizzybear. How’s your pain?” Dad walked over to my bedside. Bending over, he used his fingertips to push my hair from my face. Dressed in khakis and a navy polo, I was surprised to see him so casual. “Should I get the nurse?”
“Please.” I managed to smile.
“Good morning, Miss Allen. I’m Doctor Monroe, I’m one of the surgeons from your splenectomy.” A tall, older man in a long white la
b coat stepped forward as my dad left. “When you came in, you had significant internal bleeding but thankfully, it was only a ruptured spleen. Everything else looked good. A few broken ribs, but overall, you’re damn lucky. This,” he motioned to the younger doctor behind him, “is Doctor Paxton. He worked on your leg.”
“How are you feeling, Miss Allen?” Dr. Paxton asked with a friendly smile.
“I’ve had better hangovers,” I joked without laughing. I knew better than to laugh or even breathe deeply without pain medicine. I asked the only question that had been weighing on me since I realized how badly my leg was broken. I had prayed and cried about the answer I was going to get. I tried to remain hopefully optimistic. “Will I be able to ride again?”
“Your friends said that would be your first question.” He chuckled. “Yes, after several months of rest and then physical therapy, you should be fine to start riding again. It was a pretty straight forward break but because of displacement we had to put a few screws and a small plate in to stabilize the fractures.”
“But I’ll be able to ride again, right?” I asked once more as Dad came back with a petite, blonde nurse.
“Yes. Most athletes come back as good as new from this kind of injury. Just follow directions and you’ll be out there in no time. We’ll see you tomorrow on rounds, get some rest.” Dr. Monroe and Dr. Paxton said their goodbyes and traded places at my bedside with my dad and my new nurse.
“Hey, Kinsley,” she said with the most adorable southern accent. “I’m Cynthia. I’ll be with you today. Your dad said you’re interested in your next dose of pain medicine, is that right?”
“Yes, please. My chest and leg are killin’ me.”
She waved her badge over the corner of the computer, accessing the electronic medical records system. “Looks like you were due to get morphine and Zofran about thirty minutes ago. Let me go grab them really quick.”
I smiled through the pain and looked up at my dad, seeing the clock over his right shoulder. It was almost nine in the morning. “Where’s Mom?”
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