I put my hand on his arm and squeezed to reassure him. “It’s not that bad. And it’s not forever.”
He took a shuddering breath and nodded.
I helped him to bed and got out some pajamas for him, but he waved me off. “I think I’ll be daring and sleep in the altogether tonight, if you don’t mind.”
“Ooh, never.” I slid beneath the covers and curled up beside him. He lifted his arm to put it around me, and I nestled against his bony shoulder.
He turned his head, and let out a whoop of shocked laughter.
“What!” I startled, sitting up.
“My head. It’s very...” he turned his head on the pillow and giggled like a little kid. “It’s ticklish.”
“Really?” That was actually... “That’s adorable.”
“Oh? I’m glad you find it so.” He reached up and gingerly placed his palm between his scalp and the pillow. “I can’t sleep like this all night.”
“I have an idea. Sit up.” I slipped the pillow from behind his head and pulled off the cover. “I trust you to do this without smothering yourself in the night.”
He looked at me like I was a crazy person as I worked the opening of the pillow case over the top of his head. “There.”
“This isn’t - “ His eyes widened as he lay back down. “Oh. This might work. I look a pillock, but it seems a fair trade.”
“It’s only for tonight. Tomorrow I’ll see about getting some stocking caps you can sleep in.” I planted a kiss on his brow, below the light blue band of satin embellished pillowcase. “I’ve always sort of had a thing for garden gnomes.”
He caught my hand and squeezed it before bringing it to his lips. “You’re completely mad, do you know that?”
“Mhm.” I wouldn’t tell him about Holli and Deja tonight, or my little meltdown over the apartment. It seemed so totally insignificant now, in the face of what Neil was dealing with. “But if I wasn’t, you wouldn’t love me.”
I was about to turn out the light when Neil pushed up on his side and pulled the pillowcase from his head. He half-laughed and twisted the edge of the fabric in his hands. “I know that I’m physically weak. And I know that I look like a newly hatched baby bird... but...”
I leaned back on my elbows and frowned. “Neil, I don’t care how you look—”
“No, no, this isn’t an emotional crisis. I just feel dreadfully unsexy right now. And I know I look it. But we haven’t... in a long time. That is, I was hoping... could I watch you come?”
His bashful request took me aback. When Neil wanted something sexually, he didn’t have a problem asking for it. As kinky as I’d become under his tutelage, he could still shock me. If he was being timid about asking to fool around, it was only because he thought I might reject him.
My heart twisted. He was asking permission.
That isn’t how this works.
A pulse of excitement teased me between my legs. I knew how to fix this. I smiled slowly, leaned down, and pressed my lips against his. We hadn’t been doing much kissing lately, because we were trying to be careful about not getting him sick. But he was already vulnerable; I didn’t need him to dwell any more on how ill he was.
I reluctantly pulled back. “Stay right here. I have an idea.”
Hopping from the bed, I sprinted into the dressing room. I’d left the toy cabinet unlocked when I’d retrieved the camera. My laziness assisted me in springing the surprise.
When I came back to the bed, I was wearing my collar and nothing else. I dropped an armload of toys on the end of the bed.
He pushed himself up to sit and ran a self-conscious hand over his head. “I’m not sure—”
“You might not be up to it, physically, but you can still fuck me.” I plucked a bottle of lube from the pile of silicone and plastic on the bed. “For you.”
Catching it out of the air, he laughed. “All right. What’s the game?”
“Fuck me. I’ll do all the work, you just tell me what to do.” I looked over to the delicate, powder-blue and dark wood chair in front of the fireplace. I pulled it to face the end of the bed, far enough back that Neil’s view wouldn’t be blocked, and sat myself down. I slid my hands down my thighs and slowly eased them apart.
Neil’s breath audibly left him.
I dipped my head and caught the nail of my index finger between my teeth. “So... are you in?”
“Go downstairs and get the video camera.” I heard my Sir’s voice in the command, and my body throbbed.
I grabbed my robe off the back of the door and hurried downstairs, through the dark center stairwell to the second floor. I was back in a flash. My heart pounded, and not just from running through a dark, slightly creepy house. If Neil recorded me, there would be evidence of my total surrender to him. I wasn’t ashamed of myself for anything I did with him, but it was so intimate.
I knew he wouldn’t ever let such a video fall into the wrong hands. And the thought of what he would do with it...
I wanted to be the last damn woman on that video camera.
“Here.” I passed it to him and went back to the chair, toying with my collar. “Tell me what to do, Sir.”
The little light on the front of the camera came on, and I took a breath, paralyzed, aware that I was staring right into it.
Neil settled back on pillows he’d arranged in my absence, and moved one to support his arm as he held the camera. “Sit down.”
I did as he told me, sitting primly on the edge of the chair, my hands in my lap, palms up.
“Sit back, and spread your legs.”
The low, carved arms prevented me from parting my legs too far.
“If you put your feet over the sides, can you touch the floor?”
I raised one leg slowly, deliberately flashing a perfect view of my cunt. I took my time getting myself positioned just right. Not even my big toes brushed the carpet. “No, Sir. I can’t touch the floor.”
“Very good.”
Neil’s gaze scorched every anticipatory center of my brain as it traveled a slow path from my spread pussy, up to my breasts, to where I stroked a fingertip along the bottom edge of my collar.
He was back. Dominant Neil wasn’t gone, just hidden beneath layers of sickness and fatigue and body image issues. The fact that he could be pushed aside by such seemingly trivial matters was alarming proof that below his controlled, calm exterior, Neil Elwood was just a human being like the rest of us.
But not when we were together like this. When I was under his command, he was anything but ordinary.
“You’re already wet,” he observed casually. “I can see it.”
I took a shaky breath. He hadn’t given me a command yet. I sat before him, completely exposed, the video camera dispassionately documenting every long second while I waited, my arousal growing with every heartbeat.
“Take the fingertips of your right hand. Starting at the wrist of your left hand, draw them up, slowly, until you reach your shoulder.”
My fingers trembled as I dragged them up my arm with a feather-light touch. When they skated up over the curve of my shoulder, he said, “Now follow the line of your collar across your neck. At the bottom, please.”
My chest flushed. When my fingertips reached the hollow of my throat, he stopped me. “Do the same, with your left hand, to your right.”
It was slow, excruciatingly slow. It was the best kind of torture.
“What are you thinking of, Sophie?”
“I’m thinking of that time we had Skype sex,” I said with a little giggle. “I’m thinking of watching you come all over your stomach while you watched me.”
“You may stroke the outside curves of your breasts with the backs of your fingers. Don’t touch your nipples.” A faint smile softened his stern mouth. “Did you like being on display for me?”
“Yes, Sir.” My throat was suddenly parched, probably because all the moisture in my body was between my legs.
“Do you like it now?”
“Yes, Sir.
” The light touches were torment. My breasts felt full and heavy, and the sensation grew worse the closer my misbehaving hands strayed toward my nipples.
“Sophie,” he warned, and I quickly corrected myself.
“Do you know what I’m going to do with this video?” he asked as I continued my stroking. I shook my head, my eyes drifting closed. The cool air on my hot, exposed clitoris made me want to squirm against the chair. He breathed in through his nose. “I’m going to watch it and jerk off, of course, but I’m also going to make you watch it. I’d love to restrain you, so you couldn’t look away, and force you to come again and again while you watch yourself doing what I’m going to make you do tonight.”
“And what’s that, Sir?” I wanted to know, but I dreaded it all the same.
He didn’t answer. He just said, “You may touch the undersides of your breasts as well, now.”
I skimmed my fingers over the sensitive swells, my breathing speeding up. I rocked my hips a little in the chair.
“Don’t get ahead of yourself.” He reached below the blankets and I realized he was stroking himself with his left hand, lazy movements I couldn’t see.
I pouted a bit. “You know, it’s not fair that you get such a good show, and I don’t get to see anything.”
“I never said this was going to be fair.” He said nothing else, just watched for several long minutes as I teased my aching breasts. Just when I thought I would scream with impatience, he ordered, “Make wide circles around your nipples.” I did as he asked, and he watched me for a moment before continuing. “I’m going to count backward from ten, and for every number you’re going to make those circles smaller. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Sir.”
Slowly, he counted down the passes of my fingertips over my skin. I brushed across the puckered line of demarcation between the pale skin of my breast and the rosy, delicate areola. With every narrowing circle, my nipples grew harder, into stiff peaks I swirled my index finger around as Neil reached “one.”
“Now pinch them, between your thumb and forefinger.”
I did as he ordered, my head dropping back with a moan. I arched my back, forgetting in a second of bliss that I was under his control and not my own. I wasn’t sure if I could move or not.
“Do you want to move?” he asked, and my whimper in response elicited a chuckle from him. “You can, if you’d like. Keep pinching, though.”
I rolled my hips, the motion both relieving and intensifying the ache in my pelvis. I wanted him. That was the absolute worst part about getting my mental health back on track— I had a libido and missed the sex we weren’t having.
“Is there a vibrator in that pile of toys you brought out?” Neil asked. I nodded. “Stop what you’re doing, and get it. A dildo, as well.”
I swung my legs down and went to the end of the bed. I picked up a forked JimmyJane vibe and one of the dildos I’d brought out, a life-like one about seven inches long.
“Excuse me, but if I’m going to be fucking you, at least give me some credit,” he laughed, and I picked up another, slightly larger one. “No, none of those will do at all. Go back to the cupboard. You’ll find purple one in there you might like.”
“Um. Okay?” I gave him a smile coupled with a furrowed brow. I hadn’t seen any purple ones, just...
The moment I opened the cupboard, I saw it. It was what I would have called magenta, instead of purple. It was also just about as long as Neil was, and slightly thicker. Which meant I needed to carry the damn thing with two hands.
“You’re kidding, right?” I called, giggling as I exited the closet.
He grinned that malicious Dom grin of his and slowly shook his head. “As you were.”
My tummy fluttered as I scooped up the vibrator and carried it and the dildo back to my chair. I laid them between my legs, perilously close to the edge of the seat, and returned to my assigned position.
“Lay it on your chest, between your breasts, so it doesn’t roll away from you,” Neil instructed, but how the thing would roll I had no idea. At the base, a disturbingly detailed magenta scrotum curved down to a suction cup. So you could use it in the shower, obviously.
Man, I really had to go through that toy cupboard more often.
I did as Neil told me, the weight surprising against my chest. There was something decidedly filthy about reclining there, my legs spread, with a huge magenta dick nestled between my breasts for later use.
“Stroke your clit. However you like, whichever way turns you on most. You’re going to need to be absolutely soaked to handle that.”
“Oh fuck, you know I can’t deal when you talk like that.” I flicked my middle finger over my clit, back and forth, raising my hips up in little jerks.
“I do.” He adjusted something on the camera. I was pretty sure he was zooming in. “That’s why I said it.”
I took slow, deep breaths, trying to control my arousal. He never let me come right away, anyway, and I wanted this to last a while. I sighed and moaned, more than I would have if he weren’t watching me. It’s not that I ever fake an orgasm, but sometimes it’s fun to exaggerate the sounds you would have been making anyway. I admit, I have a hidden love of performing.
“You must be wet by now,” he murmured. “Show me.”
I slipped a middle finger between my aching folds and encountered the slickness that had already seeped from my cunt. I pushed inside and pumped back and forth a few times. I held up my hand, glistening with proof. “See?”
“Very good. Now, spread it over yourself,” he commanded.
This time, I pressed the tips of three of my fingers against my opening, coating them, coaxing more wetness out, reveling in the decadent lack of friction. I honestly thought I could fit my entire fist inside of me, if not for the angle. Then I thought about Neil’s big hands, and I moaned.
Wow, that might be the dirtiest thing you’ve ever imagined doing, Scaife.
I supposed it was only fair to share the image with him. “I was just thinking... about how good this feels. And then I was thinking about how good it would feel if you did it.” I pushed my fingers deeper and moaned. “And I’ve never tried fisting.”
“Good lord.” He flushed. It wasn’t often I could shock Neil, so when I did, I was enormously proud of myself. I beamed at him and he cleared his throat. “Well, if you’re ready for a fist, you’re capable of that.”
“This?” I reached for the dildo and he tutted at my impatience.
“Not yet. I want you to use the vibrator first.”
I picked up the vibe with its two-pronged tip. The shape reminded me a little of the Millennium Falcon.
“Oh, you’re going to enjoy that one,” he said, and I could have sworn his eyebrows made points like a cartoon devil’s.
I slipped the vibe down, trapping my clit in the narrow space between the two prongs, and hit the little plus sign on the front to turn it on. It jolted to life, two different vibration patterns on both sides of my clit, and I was almost immediately there.
“Don’t come, Sophie,” he warned me, and I pulled the vibe away just in time. “I want you to bring yourself to the edge several times, and back off just before you come.”
I remembered this lovely torture from Paris. It had been hard enough to do with my fingers. I took deep breaths and tried to think of anything but the pounding need in my clit.
When I was able to start again, the vibrator wasn’t against me for more than thirty seconds before I had to pull it away. “You’re right. I really, really like this one. Can I use it all the time?”
“You can use anything you like, you know that.” He sighed happily and leaned back on the pillows.
“How many times do I have to do this?” I asked him, after I’d pulled the vibrator away for a third time.
“Oh, as many as you like,” he said with a shrug that I didn’t believe for a moment. There would be a catch.
I narrowed my eyes at him and flicked the vibrator back on. “Then I’ll do fi
ve.”
“Five sounds reasonable.” He was giving me way too much control. Who the hell knew what he had planned? “When you back off for the final time, set the vibrator aside and use the dildo. Run the tip of it up and down your slit. Get it nice and wet.”
“You’re not helping me come down,” I whined, rolling my hips against the chair. I made it through two more torturous edges.
“Don’t drop it on the floor,” Neil warned me. “You’re going to need it again.”
I rested the vibe between my tits, in the space the dildo had taken up. The fake cock was incredibly heavy in my hands, and it didn’t help that my body was trembling. I’d perspired during my exercise in denial, and the surface of the silicone was slightly damp from my chest.
I did as Neil asked, rubbing the massive head between my labia. While I was wet, I was going to need some serious help to get the damn thing in. Neil said my name softly, and when I looked up, he tossed me the bottle of lube.
I caught it, and laughed. “That would have been embarrassing, if I’d missed that and it was recorded for posterity.”
“No one will ever see it but you and me,” he promised. “Now. Get it good and slick, and let’s see if you can take it.”
Before, I’d been super confident about my abilities, but feeling the size of the thing against me... I was less certain. I popped open the top of the lube bottle and drizzled some into my palm, swirling it over the head and shaft of the toy. Then I wiped the remainder on my already wet pussy. “Maybe I should have put a towel down.”
“A stain could be a fond memory.”
“You’re demented.” I held my breath and pushed the head of the dildo against my opening. I wriggled and slipped a finger between my labia and the silicone, parting myself for easier access.
“And you’re beautiful,” he retorted, taking a deep breath as he watched the head of the enormous cock pop inside.
I hissed in surprise; it was colder than I was expecting, with a lot less give than I was used to. It stretched me almost painfully, and the only way to relieve the ache was to either remove it or push it deeper. I chose the latter, forcing myself to relax as the long, thick column filled me.
The Girlfriend (The Boss) Page 28
