by Zac Funstein
“Onni Kurri is my personal choice.”
A sense of immediate ire like during a rage episode threatened to take over. As if filled with furious rage as a volcano about to erupt. It’s useless at those times to suggest that you should ‘just relax don’t let it bother you’. You can't relax. You probably would if you could, but you can't.
‘Sensing that I had touched somewhere vulnerable, I was quick to follow up the advantage gained’, Dexter was to mention anon.
This disdain must have been sensed for it was uttered quietly.
“You don’t like Onni? The man is nearly retired working overtime/ extra shifts like a trojan because his daughter is getting married. Seems a nice family sort of person. If you don’t like him tell us why. I believe in liberty- when I say liberty, I mean the thing in its widest imaginable sense — liberty up to the extreme of the feasible/ tolerable. I am against forbidding anybody to do anything, or say anything, or believe anything.”
“I don’t trust him I guess-that’s what it boils down to.”
“Where are you going-what are you going to meet if you turn this corner?” D asked as the one interviewed walked out.
“Home. I've been here enough, that is a solid certainty-to the milieu of a well-born, leisurely bachelor lawyer, with means just adequate for a life of elegant solitude that I aspire to. The mundane like myself don't belong in somewhere like this,” sighed Xawa.
“I'm sorry, okay? I know you don’t like Kurri; it just happened. The pen must have slipped or something. His initials OK kept coming up in the searches.”
But the tension plus fatigue had simply overpowered him-the other man was gone.
Onni Kurri didn’t seem like anyone to really get them annoyed. Indeed the assumption of him being a family guy was correct a very nice, middle-aged, bastion-of-the earth family man with a gentle humble demeanour albeit with a penchant for natty leather jackets. A high school friend of mine had a penchant for wearing the garb of a motorcycle gang member, although actually a sweet/ scholarly person, consoled departmental wallah Rasmus Hyypiä, when anyone showed surprise at this garb.
Omni was no stranger to fibric leftovers like this either as Vonne Monto (who was largely considered to be his foil) was told. Monto was considered the pre-eminent straightman of his rank. Those that claimed that Kurri always used to be considered reasonable, clear-sighted, but apparently had now been touched by war fever were definitely wrong.
“What do you consider that the Schreiber remnant is from having adjudged that it is a nylon used to mix with other fabrics?”
“I have given it much consideration Monto do not be mislead.”
“What conclusions do you draw Onni?”
“It is incomplete, uninteresting (plus a little too depressing) but I believe that this may be from an automobile.”
Vonne’s Aunty Kathrina was a Baptist, but no matter, K had a car always anyone who called it an automobile got shot down in flames.
“I know that sounds funny I’m just being pedantic. These particles are from the make of carpet in a particular model which may or may not be the same as the Volvo the deceased drove. Since there was no carpet found in the abandoned vehicle we may presume that it comes from some external method of transportation. If we find any then it must have been nearby because they do not adhere very well-but are mislaid in a very short while.”
“There is a database now I believe of all the various carpets-all but a few very esoteric motors are missing-a Bugatti or something. You’re hardly likely to get a classic Lamborghini or Porsche on a remote highway in Northern Canada-these are for show”
“That is why we are going to see Arvi Koskela who is the curator of this database.”
They pulled into a small municipal car park: potholes, cinder, crushed limestone hardcore and mud. ... They got out. The rectangular premises with a square dome plus a line of marble columns around it was similarly unimpressive like the rest of the architecture nearby.
The male secretary that greeted them was suitably blank, like someone really bored who didn’t care what they did if it didn’t upset his routine. The smile was false-but an attempt was made to try to arrange it into suitably welcoming lines that then hardened into a suitably incredulous mold. Onni smiled aggressively at him, confident, welcoming an argument.
'You wanna meet Mr. Koskela…. anytime?' it is said with forced charm. 'Like Today. Now. Okay I’ll see if Arvi is receiving guests.’
Kurri could just make out what was inside. There were stairs located on the left of the inside of the hall which would to an as yet non-descript floor above.
A bakelite phone was picked up on a desk nearby- the conversation could just be made out.
‘I don't know—strangers—never seen them before—.’
Onni was suitably bristly.
“Look, if you could hurry up, I have to be in court at the next sessions, I've got a few very important things to do –.”'
“Mr. Koskela has said if you would permit the indulgence of his company.”
After taking them up the winding staircase-Koskela was suitably welcoming-a good-looking Afro-American of middle-age, good-humored, yet friendly disposition-directed them into what seemed a giant hall with conference table. There were small chandeliers hanging everywhere, miniature replicas of the one in the downstairs hallway. When Arvi saw them standing there on his threshold the ‘automobile carpet man’ as his title had become would instantly realise the difficulty his tardiness had caused.
Their e-mail had not been answered because of his prodigious mail to other parties amongst which it had got mislaid. Mostly the Thailand women that were written to-even though as yet a bride had not been chosen. There was something about their culture which was liked. Some were serious about meeting him that was very plain from the sentiment conveyed. The difficulty was fathoming just why they liked him. A doubt insinuated that they confused ostentation with security which wasn’t necessarily the same thing.
Hồ Kim Nhớ had returned to her parents in Surat Thani on account of the fact they were caring for her daughter Huỳnh Thị Linh Xuân but since her English comprehension had improved they were corresponding even more.
“Ignore the suspicious enquiries by my secretary Huszár gentlemen if you would. I was sure you might be some terrifying woman in a pin-striped suit. Come into the living room-ha ha-bit big for you not to worry. It's a bit of a mess, I'm afraid. Though I tried to clear things up a bit. We get a lot of highly suspect callers sometimes.”Then seeing they are admiring the sport memorabilia everywhere. “If you are a college basketball fan like I am, you’ll understand why I’ve long admired Varga Varsàny’s leadership style. While no coach treasures a win more than Varga, his greater purpose—to lead his young players to better lives, and then challenge them to give to others was a great inspiration.”
“You enjoy determining car-carpets-there can't be many who share your enthusiasm!”
No moment was left for determining what gave him a zest for this unusual hobby for the reply came.
“The great thing is that when you affirm another, it soon returns like a boomerang- you receive affirmation from them. Bingo! Then you want to give even more the next time! Round ‘n round it goes. That's how strong this rug evangelism is.” The visitor was looked up down casually. “You are not a rug designer. I digress we must move on swiftly-I sense this is imperative.”
As quickly as it entered his sphere of interest however, after a quick glance however the Schreiber relic was almost violently discarded. Even though it didn’t seem like Koskela was deliberately withholding gratification-that is enjoying being unkind- Onni was anesthetized.
“I’m sorry I can’t help-If you need my assistance, you know my number; if you don't, I suggest you write it down because you need to get rid of any evidence you may have Onni of myself or Huszár ever having worked here.”
The gifts owner was visibly disturbed.
“There is something wrong you’re moving Koskela I don�
��t understand?”
“I was sure from your communique that this was bigger-much bigger. We often add our personal subjective interpretation of what is going on, which is often out of touch with all of the facts, but we don’t want to add this here. We need to use a stripping agent to find just what we are dealing with.”
“I’m coming up against a lot of new technology that I haven’t really come across before. I’m not sure what a stripping-agent is. It sounds like paint remover. Modern science has touched only a tip but still certain properties have not been unravelled/ still remain even deeper thanks to dullards like us. ”
Onni didn’t like admitting to being stupid considering that the price had been paid for any vanity.
“Don’t get bamboozled by that-you weren’t wrong-it’s just a glorified acid. They try to dress it up but that’s all it is at the end of the day. A very sophisticated sort but an astringent none-the-less with a very complex formula. We have to be careful not to destroy that which we are actually working on.”
“I believe I understand-it removes excess to what is actually there leaving the basis intact.”
“I believe the dye might interfere with finding just what we have, which if you had more to go on I could help you with, but this is micro territory. It’s like a canvas which has the... ”
Vonne tried to put this into perspective but wasn’t succeeding very well-get a little bit closer to the setup: the knack was clearly to separate things from each other, so to use it they had to have a reactant.
“There is the fabric then there is the dye you're saying that we have to remove the dye to find out what we have.”
“Comparing pieces of torn fabric one from a suspect another found near the victim stripping agent may react the same which might suggest that they are from the same source.”
“But another might not be so identical-I believe I’m beginning to see Koskela.”
“A lackadaisical tester might be tempted to skip the next agent they could use with disastrous results.”
“Someone could end up falsely convicted just because they couldn’t be bothered. You don’t want to send too many people to jail for something they didn’t do.”
“That must have happened though it is terrible to try to get around how many that might be I can do this test on larger fabric but for something of this size Arkady Andreeff is who you seek. His unorthodox approach and profound respect for the people he meets challenge conventional understandings of the modern problems faced by those such as us.”
“I don’t believe I have come across Andreeff before.”
“Where is the coordinate in the world, where is the continent or island, that is a stranger to the labours of this good man? Even the desert has known his presence, for it often sheltered him in time of danger.”
“Often it is only when we have tried something that we can see where we have gone wrong, how to accomplish our task better, easier, or more carefully-that Andreeff can assist.”
“Seems a little intimidating.”
“Don’t be intimidated if you meet him-I’ve always found him very personable-easy to get on with. Corporations often try to be friendly and personable, as if they are actual people-well Andreeff might be a role model on which they base themselves.”
Downstairs there was a sound that somehow resembles faint, distant thunder or the grinding of rusty hinges, then a thudding noise- one could almost picture a single person dragging a heavy table or bureau. They could not understand what was going down but then before they could decide Huszár was on the telephone. Vonne wondered if the secretary was engaged with another staff member or if it was his girl friend, Koskela had many creepy experiences whilst in basement, which often seemed like being watched. The one room where Koskela had ever been by himself was downstairs in the cellar of this old house. The only sound there had been his own breathing, his own steps on the cold stone. The interloper had been startled to open a cupboard there of to be confronted by a starring bevy of idols made out of clay, papier maché plus one of bronze that must have belonged to the previous owner. The latter seemed to be saying-although this might be a projection- If you have the audacity to have any sort of graven image, which you know to be wrong in worshipping. I suggest that you reverse this scenario fairly quickly.
“Another piece of fabric to compare with would help-but before you go there is a solitary aspect I can help you with this nylon is made originally by Herman Ulyanov Ltd.”
“That is a big company Koskela?”
“It is licensed everywhere-it makes carpet for cars but conventional clothing as well.”
When Onni got home HU Ltd was perused courtesy of the Internet. It didn’t seem a cover for anything just a company that made carpets nothing more nothing less there was no getting away with it. They made carpets pure/simple. Not the sort that would get embroiled in unexplained demises on a remote stretch of road in British Columbia.
D
Arkady Andreeff liked Vonne Monto immediately without really knowing why-it was just like Arkady studied him with total absorption, as if draining something out-although quite what couldn’t be ascertained. Who knows what attracts us to another person some claim it is pheromones yet others attribute less refined means of attraction like deposit- accounts or property ownership.
Monto dressed like the Army/Navy surplus store was his favourite haunt. Maybe after stopping off to buy machetes, camouflage outfits, riot batons or survival gear taking a quick peek through their latest fashion range was an absolute must. Vonne wouldn’t have been amiss on a battlefield
Then there was the way that Vonne moved like a Rodin statue come to life. Vonne had the same smoothness. The Kiss-that was the one everyone seemed to like.
Someone had told him that after some time together, Angelina Monto separated from her husband with the intention of divorcing him, so moved into separate accommodation because his devotion to duty was just too difficult to live up to. There was a bookshelf with loads of volumes with Arkady Andreeff written on the side however they weren’t on the NY Times best seller list but treatises on chemical formula accessible only to a small cognoscenti. It would not take a genius to guess what was inside-that is it would take a genius probably to read it. They were lovingly bound anyway.
“I sense you are genuinely able to separate being a writer from your current function as a director,” exclaimed Monto trying to get on his good-side-it was sensed that for any aid to be forthcoming then this must be done.
“What qualities separate a top-flight guide writer from one who's merely average? This ability to have a separate self one for the technical another for the fictional. But I digress Mr. Kurri is not very well I hear.”
“Previous engagements take up his energy yes that is true.”
“I fully understand Mr. Monto- Onni has commitments elsewhere-we all have busy schedules we all know what it is like to get in a fuddle.”
Vonne could never hear ‘fuddle’ without reliving the incident with the late great Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau who was reported to have got into such a fuddle in Parliament, although Pierre denied it —claiming ‘fuddle duddle’ would have been better. The matter was never satisfactorily resolved.
“We all know Candide, Voltaire's critique of optimism, itself an ineliminably upbeat book. It is my bible Andreeff. Individuals vary considerably in their levels of optimism, regardless of how many dreadful things might have befallen them-I must have been fortunate. I must have done something good somewhere.”
“You believe that the Schreiber sample can be stripped of all the extraneous to the essential underneath?”
“I certainly do-that is why we are here on this earth no mistake. Here is what will help us.”
A print of Man Ray when experimenting with new techniques/ compositions -when many of the Surrealists used photography to signal that their art belonged firmly in the modern, mechanical world watched benevolently from clipped together glass frame.
“The facts should be c
arefully separated from opinion then used such those people that can relate to them are able to don’t you agree Vonne?” said Andreeff pointing to mysterious paper-bag that had separated them throughout the meeting. His assistant had put on her anorak, carried her duffle bag downstairs before going to the study as requested then putting the packet on the Professor's desk where it was now.Thea W. Jensen (that was the assistant) paused for a last glance; at his desk which was an orderly clutter of papers-but more importantly at the packet which rested so casually-then was gone.
“What is in the bag Arkady?”
“Sodium dithionite-which my assistant in her enthusiasm has brought a little too much of unfortunately but not to worry. Too much is better than nothing at all I believe you’ll agree-motivating the young to do anything is nigh on an impossibility let alone getting them to put any enthusiasm into it. We only need a very small amount-so you’d hardly notice.”
Something which hung around him on a chain (like that sometimes used for spectacles) worn presumably for this purpose was pulled from inside his shirt. The packet is delicately opened then the spoon like implement dipped in like some coke fiend who has chanced upon a massive haul.”
“I wouldn’t recommend doing this it is highly toxic,” exclaims Arkady dipping the spoon into the powder.
“You must test if it is the good stuff I understand.”
An appreciative going over is given. The spoon the returned from whence it came. This must have been correct for it was suggested diplomatically.
“If you would follow us Monto kindly.”
They begin walking together down a corridor.
Day wear for Andreeff consisted of angular shaped separates that included wild patterned acrylic jumpers plus half-mast trousers. Someone must have said somewhere too- buy your suiting as separates, the suits sold as sets don't seem to generally be of the same quality.