“That he was going to get our drinks.”
“He said more than that.”
“He said I was a lucky man because I’m marrying you. I happen to agree with that.”
Harper rolled her eyes so hard it was a miracle she didn’t fall out of her chair. “He said something else. I know the way his mind operates. He’s a snarky guy and he’s been listening to me for a long time.”
“I can’t remember what he said.”
“Liar!”
Jared extended a warning finger. “Please don’t make a scene. This is your friend’s restaurant. You shouldn’t talk so loudly in it that you scare away his customers.”
The admonishment hit hard and Harper’s face crumbled. “I’m sorry.” She meant it. “I don’t mean to rant and rave like this. It’s just ... my parents. You have no idea how annoying my parents are. I feel as if I’m caught in high school again.
“Those years stuck under that roof with them when I was old enough to understand what was going on were the worst in my life,” she continued. “I mean ... it was painful. I didn’t understand why they stayed together. They obviously hated each other to the point where they couldn’t stand to look at one another.”
Jared’s heart went out to her. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what that’s like. My parents always got along. And, when they didn’t, they took fights behind closed doors. Those times were rare, though.”
“You’re lucky.” Harper leaned her forehead on her hand and rubbed. “We found Carl’s ghost, by the way. He was hanging around outside the house.”
Jared glanced around to make sure nobody had heard her — he was still leery when she openly talked about her gifts — but absolutely no one was looking in their direction. “Did he say anything?”
“He didn’t even realize he was dead. It’s going to take some time for him to remember. He was much more interested in picking a fight with Mom ... who couldn’t even see him.”
“He wanted to fight with your mother?” Jared didn’t like the sound of that. “How come?”
“That’s a very good question. I have no idea why. He seemed most upset because my father was with us. He called my mother a charlatan, which might’ve been funny if my head wasn’t already pounding thanks to the arguments.”
“I’m sorry.” Jared had no idea how to make her feel better. “Maybe you shouldn’t spend time with your parents.”
“Why do you think I didn’t move back in with them after college? I could have. It would’ve saved me money. The idea made me want to throw something through a window, though.”
“Your mother?”
Harper’s lips curved. “There are times I would definitely like to throw her through a window.”
“I don’t know what to tell you, though. You either have to cut them out of your life or put your foot down. I don’t expect the former and I’ve never seen you do the latter.”
Harper balked. “I put my foot down.”
“When?”
“When ... .” She trailed off, uncertain. “I’ll come up with an instance. Just you wait. Until then, tell me about your day.”
Since she seemed to need the distraction, Jared did just that. He launched into a long tale that encompassed all his interviews, and when he was finished, Harper was intent.
“It sounds to me like Carl was a real jerk,” she said as she ate the salad that had been delivered between stories. “I figured that out myself because he was trying to hit on me and asked if ghosts can have sex.”
Jared made a face. “That is lovely. Wait ... can they?”
“Why are you asking?”
“Because, if it’s possible, we could both decide to stay behind as ghosts and keep things exactly how we like them. That would be years and years from now, mind you, but it’s nice to have options.”
Despite herself, Harper smiled. “That’s kind of cute ... but we don’t want to do that. We’ll just go to the other side together. I don’t know what’s over there — I’ve only seen glimpses, after all — but I think it will be a fabulous place to spend our happily ever after.”
Jared caught her hand and brought it to his lips. “I don’t care where we end up as long as we’re together.”
“That’s sweet.” She was much more relaxed than she had been when he first sat down. “I’m sorry about being a ranting monster earlier. I just can’t seem to help it. They drive me crazy.”
“I think it’s a parent’s job to drive their child crazy.”
“Your mother doesn’t drive you crazy.”
“No, but ... it’s different. Your parents are wired differently than mine were. Frankly, I think it’s a miracle that you turned out semi-sane. You could’ve been a real basket case.”
“I’m not too far from there right now.”
“You’re fine.” He kissed her palm and released her hand. “I don’t want to dwell on your mother, but she went to her own house, right? She’s not still hanging around our house, is she?”
“Not if she knows what’s good for her.” Harper’s gaze momentarily darkened. “I left her with my father. They were fighting about whether or not he liked cream in his coffee. I had to get away from them so I walked from the coffee shop to the office. It wasn’t any more comfortable there because Eric and Molly were making out like high schoolers on the couch but even that was preferable to listening to my parents.”
Eric Tyler and Molly Parker were Harper’s employees at GHI, Ghost Hunters, Inc. Harper and Zander started the business after college, not caring if they were the laughingstock of the community, because it seemed wise to take advantage of Harper’s peculiar gift. They’d made a real go of it and most people didn’t even question what they did for a living. There were some, of course, who looked down on them, but Harper wasn’t the type to dwell on that.
“They’re in love,” Jared teased. “I would much rather have him making out with her rather than mooning after you.”
“He did that for like five minutes.”
“I’m betting he did that quite frequently before we started dating, but it doesn’t matter. They’re together and happy. I take it there are no new clients.”
“Believe it or not, the run-up to Christmas and the few weeks right after is a slow time for us.”
“Ghosts respect the holidays?”
“No, people just decide they would rather put up with ghosts until all their shopping is complete. January is a dead zone because most everybody is in debt. Things will pick up nicely in February.”
“Thanks for the tip.”
“I don’t mind the lull right now,” she admitted. “What I can’t stand is that the one case we do have involves my mother. She doesn’t even seem to be a little sorry that he’s dead.”
Jared wanted to quiz her regarding Gloria’s reaction but it felt invasive ... especially given his motivations. He wasn’t ready to tell Harper her mother was a legitimate suspect in their murder investigation. His heart hurt at the mere thought.
“Well, if your mother is no longer dwelling with us — and I can’t tell you how excited that makes me — I have a suggestion,” he offered, his eyes twinkling. “How about we finish dinner, pick up some cake and ice cream from the bakery, head home and eat it naked in front of the fireplace?”
Harper chuckled. “You had that one ready to just whip out, didn’t you?”
He nodded. “Ever since I saw that fireplace.”
“I think it sounds like a fantastic idea.” She spoke from the heart. “A few hours of just the two of us is exactly what the doctor ordered.”
“Good. I’m sorry your day didn’t go well.”
“I am, too. My night is looking up, though.”
“You’ve got that right.”
HARPER WAS COMPLETELY SOBER and back to her normal self when she and Jared landed at the house. She carried the bag with the cake and ice cream while he gave chase, and they were breathless when they made it inside.
“I really do love you,” Harper murmured as Jared he
lped her out of her coat, his mouth on hers.
He laughed at the muffled words. He understood them completely. “I really love you, too. You have no idea how much.”
“Oh, I think I do.” She held onto his arm as she kicked off her boots and dragged him toward the living room. “Come on. I’m starving for cake ... and you.”
“That makes two of us.”
Jared flicked the switch on the gas fireplace to turn it on and then frowned when he heard a noise from the other end of the house.
Harper, apparently oblivious, sat cross-legged on the floor. “Come on. I’ll feed you cake.”
“Just a second, Heart.” Jared craned his neck to look down the hallway that led to the guest bedroom. “Did you hear that?”
“All I hear is my own pounding heart.” Harper opened the container that held the chocolate cake. “Do you think it’s wrong of me to want to rub this frosting all over your chest and lick it off?”
Jared caught her hand as she reached for his belt loop and gave her a curt shake of his head. Finally catching up to his mood, she frowned.
“Is something wrong?”
“I think someone is in the house.” Jared hated uttering the words because all the playfulness vacated Harper’s face in two seconds flat. “I need you to put your boots on and get ready to run across the road in case I find something.” He drew his service weapon and held up his hand to still her when she opened her mouth to argue. “Do it.”
Her heart rate picked up a notch as she slowly got to her feet and trudged toward the front door. She felt as if the weight of the world was resting on her shoulders as she tugged on the boots and watched Jared slip into the hallway. He didn’t call out to her, whisper words of reassurance or love as he readied himself to face an enemy. He was too intent on hunting whoever was stupid enough to break into a cop’s house.
Harper knew she should’ve stayed in the foyer and prepared herself to flee, but she couldn’t swallow the idea of leaving Jared to fight with a potential intruder on his own. Instead, she cut toward the hallway and scampered behind him, ignoring the dirty look he shot her when she caught up.
He gestured in the opposite direction, his expression serious. She shook her head.
“Go,” he whispered.
“No.” She refused to back down. “We’re doing this together.”
“There’s no we. I’m the cop. I’m the one who is armed.” He kept his voice low.
“There’s always a we. I’m going with you. The longer we stand here arguing about it, the more time we waste. It might be nothing. Maybe my mother left the fan on in the room or something.”
Jared arched an eyebrow. He hadn’t even considered that. “That fan is old.”
“Yeah, and it creaks ... just like that noise I heard a second ago. There’s probably no one in the house.” She hoped that was true.
“You stay behind me just in case.”
“I will. I’m not leaving you, though. You wouldn’t leave me.”
“Those are entirely different circumstances, but we’ll argue about it later.” Jared squeezed her hand and then reached for the door handle. “Get ready.”
She nodded and stared at the door, willing the room to be empty so she and Jared could go back to their romantic evening.
Jared sucked in a breath and shoved open the door, frowning when he saw a hint of movement and heard a theatrical gasp.
“Who is that?” a voice bellowed.
Harper frowned. “Mom?”
Annoyed, Jared felt along the wall until he found the light switch and flicked it. When the room was bathed in light, he almost fell over. Gloria wasn’t alone.
Harper was horrified. “Dad?”
The bickering Harlows were doing a different kind of fighting tonight. It was the sort that necessitated dueling tongues and nudity.
“Shut off the light!” Gloria barked. “We’re having a private moment, for crying out loud. What are you even thinking?”
Harper was convinced she was going to pass out. “Oh, my ... they’re naked.”
“I see that.” Jared was flummoxed. “I feel sick.”
“You’re not the only one.”
Nine
“I think I’ve lost the ability to hear.” Harper jerked her head back and forth to make the muffling effect closing in over her dissipate. “Or maybe ... .” She listed to the side.
Jared caught her before she hit the floor. She didn’t pass out. Her legs simply went out as she struggled to come to grips with what she was seeing.
“Harper!” He drew her to him and pressed a hand to her pale face. “Stay with me,” he ordered.
“I’m with you. I’m just having a terrible nightmare.”
“If you are, we’re sharing it.” He clutched her to his chest and glared at Gloria and Phil, who had the good sense to draw the blankets up to their chests and cover themselves. “What are you doing?”
“What do you mean?” Gloria’s face was a mask of innocence. “We’re not doing anything. What are you doing?”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Oh, I’m serious.” She was more comfortable going on the offensive, so that’s exactly what she did. “Have you ever heard of knocking?”
Jared wanted to smother her with the pillow Phil had surreptitiously moved on top of his lap. Even though he was covered with blankets, there was obviously a lot going on underneath them. “This is my house,” he reminded her. “Besides, we didn’t think you were spending the night.”
Gloria made a sad sniffling noise. “Of course I’m spending the night. I’m in mourning. My boyfriend was just murdered. It’s a trying time for me.”
“Uh-huh.” Jared smoothed the back of Harper’s hair as she buried her face in his neck. Obviously seeing her parents together was too much for her. Frankly, it was too much for him, too. “It’s so trying you’re having sex with your ex-husband in your daughter’s house.”
She was blasé. “We were just blowing off steam. It’s not a big deal.”
“Not a big deal? You guys have been mired in the most contentious divorce in the history of divorces since I met you.”
“So what?”
“It’s not what you think,” Phil offered, speaking for the first time. His cheeks were as red as Santa’s pants. “Gloria was upset and needed some sympathy. I was upset on her behalf — I mean, some people think she’s a murderer, for crying out loud — and one thing just led to another. It’s not a big deal. It happens all the time.”
Harper turned her face from Jared’s neck and focused on her father. “What do you mean? How does it happen all the time?”
“It just does.” Phil grinned broadly. “We tend to do this at least once a month, sometimes even twice. It’s honestly not a big thing. There’s nothing to worry about.”
“See.” Gloria held up her hand. “If you guys would’ve knocked, we wouldn’t even be having this discussion. We would already be finished. Now we’re going to have to start all over again.”
“Oh, my ... .” Harper couldn’t find the correct words to express how she was feeling.
The only words Jared could find were of the cursing variety. “We’re going to bed,” he gritted out. “I want this — whatever this is — to be over. I don’t want to hear another sound from this room. Do you understand?”
“Oh, geez.” Gloria rolled her eyes. “You don’t have to be such a spoilsport. You’ve been having sex with our daughter for almost a year now and you don’t hear us complaining. In fact, that’s the one aspect of your relationship I encourage. The rest of it is kind of ... meh.”
Jared huffed out a series of unintelligible syllables that didn’t form words.
“It’s fine,” Phil supplied. “There really is nothing to worry about. You guys go to bed. We’ll just finish up and you’ll never know we were here.”
“I think I might be having an aneurysm,” Harper muttered against Jared’s ear.
“You’re not the only one, Heart. Come on. We’re takin
g the cake and ice cream and locking ourselves in the bedroom. As for you two ... .” He openly glared at his future in-laws. “I don’t want to hear a sound from this room for the rest of the night. Do you understand me?”
Phil dutifully nodded, but Gloria was having none of it.
“If there’s no noise then you’re not doing it right. Would you like me to go into detail for you? I have a book at home. It’s for women over forty — I got it four years ago — but it might do you some good.”
“Not one sound,” Jared hissed. “I just ... you guys are absolutely sickening. I can’t believe you!”
HARPER WOKE IN THE USUAL position. She was curled in at Jared’s side, her head resting on his chest. The sun was shining through the window. It was winter, so the birds weren’t chirping, but the pedestal fan was whirring next to the bed.
She was warm. She felt loved and safe. And then she remembered the night before.
“Oh, son of a goat sniffer.” She rolled away from Jared and buried her head under the covers as he stretched and watched her with trepidation.
“Do you know a lot of goat sniffers, Heart?”
“I thought maybe the world would’ve ended during the night.” Her voice was muffled under the covers. “Apparently we didn’t get that lucky.”
He chuckled as he reached for the blanket and drew it away from her face. “We’re both still in this world. That makes me pretty happy.”
Her sea blue eyes were as wide as saucers. “Don’t you remember what happened last night?”
“I do and it was jarring.”
“It was worse than jarring.” She tossed off the covers and sat. Her hair was wild, standing on end, and there was makeup smeared underneath her eyes. She’d forgotten to wash her face before bed because of the horrible ordeal, which was the exact opposite of her normal routine. “It was … apocalyptic. No, it was worse than that. It was … tsunami-lyptic. Wait … is that a word?”
“I don’t believe so.” He was calm as he combed his fingers through her hair. “It’s okay. It’s not the end of the world.”
Harper’s expression was dour. “How can you say that? You saw them. They were … naked. They were making noises. Oh, man. That noise we thought was the fan was them. What do you think they were doing?”
Ghostly Visions: A Harper Harlow Mystery Books 10-12 Page 47
