by Linda Oaks
“Remember, you’re the one who wanted to talk first. I’m trying to be serious,” she reminded me, her expression thoughtful. “When the time is right, we will both sit down with Sierra and have that talk. The man who killed her father is the same man who saved me — the same man who played Memory with her, who painted on the bedroom wall with her instead of scolding her — the same man who loves us both unselfishly, unconditionally… and the same man who will cherish us for an eternity. You haven’t said the words yet, but in my heart, I know you love me and you love Sierra. By killing Ryder, you saved us both. You gave my child her mother, the only protector and caregiver she has ever known, and that man whom you refer to as her father, he has never cared for anyone except himself.”
I wanted to believe in her words; that everything would be all right, that it would all work out in the end, but still some part of me remained hesitant. Some part was still holding back.
I wanted her and I wanted Sierra, but when it was all said and done, years from now, would I end up losing everything I loved once again?
“It’s a risk,” I said, probably coming across like a selfish asshole, but it had to be said. Everything had to be put out in the open, right here and right now. Miley’s eyes slightly widened. I expected her to argue, but instead she stared solemnly back at me without saying a word. “It’s a risk not only to our future and the life we’ll build together, but a risk to any children we may or may not have of our own… the threat of the life we build together crashing down and everything going straight to hell when Sierra is finally old enough to understand the truth.”
Her eyes sparked. Her expression plainly stated she disagreed with what I said. She shook her head in denial, strands of her long hair brushing against her shoulders. Her gaze was intent, focusing solely on mine. She leaned forward and cupped my cheeks, her thumbs stroking my beard. “It’s a risk, Nate. It really is. You’re right. I agree with you, but it’s a risk that I’m willing to take. Life’s a gamble, and I’m gambling on us. You’re not throwing away our future on a whim. We’re not putting our life on hold to wait for the inevitable or to worry if the other shoe is going to drop. It may never happen, but if or when it does, we will handle it together. Life isn’t a happily ever after — believe you me, I know this all too well — but I’d live each day of my life happily with you by my side as my husband and as Sierra’s father. Whatever happens will happen regardless. When the time comes, we will deal with it together — as a family. Nate, I love you.”
Moisture gathered at the corners of my eyes. I was turning into such a pussy and it was all because of this woman. “You’ve destroyed me,” I said and for a second, she appeared confused, but then she smiled back at me. My own lips helplessly curved into a grin to mimic hers. “I love you, Miley Wilhelmina Triton… the protector of my heart. Will you allow me to spend the rest of my days by your side loving you and your daughter?”
She started to giggle, and then fell quiet. What in the hell was up with that? I’d just poured my heart out like some fucking pansy and here she was… giggling. Her lovely face inched closer; her lips hovering a hair’s breathe over mine. There was a radiant sparkle in her blue eyes I’d never seen before.
“I would love that more than anything in this entire word,” she replied, and then she shifted closer, dragging up the hem of my shirt with her movement. Her fingers teased my skin along the way, sliding dangerously slow along my ribs. My muscles tightened. My whole body tensed at the sudden rush of hot heat now pressed intimately against my abs. My eyes widened. She winked at me and then grinned.
By hell, I fucking knew it. She wasn’t wearing any panties!
Whether it be hours, days, months, or even years, I had been blessed with this beautiful spitfire sitting on my lap. Life would definitely never be dull with Miley Wilhelmina Triton around. She knew exactly how to keep a man like me on his toes, and with that thought, a happy groan escaped my lips right before I captured that sassy mouth of hers beneath mine.
EPILOGUE
Eight Months Later
~Miley~
“DID YOU FIND it, babe?”
That voice had me raising my head from the box I’d just managed to drag out from underneath a stack of junk. Warm hazel eyes regarded me curiously. Just the sight of him made my heart stutter. This man, he was my undoing. My body quivered, coming to life beneath his gaze. I had no control what so ever when it came to him.
“I think it’s in this box,” I confirmed, and drew in a deep breath. I couldn’t help the way my voice sounded. It was as if I were winded, and it had absolutely nothing to do with me digging around in the attic but everything to do with the sexy man before me who guarded my heart and my daughter’s as if they were both national treasures.
Nate thought he was the lucky one, but in truth, it was actually me… well, me and my child.
“I also found that million dollars your gran had hidden up here.”
“Quit shitting me, woman. You drive me crazy.”
Typical, Nate.
Full lips were curved into a grin. My attention was drawn to the matching dimples in his sculpted cheeks that not even his closely cropped beard managed to conceal. He was gorgeous. The epitome of everything I’d ever desired packaged into one breathtaking male. He’d finally given in and allowed me to trim his beard. With a sigh, I recalled how I’d almost had him talked into a goatee until Sierra had butted in proclaiming she loved Daddy Nate’s beard.
I swear, that child had him wrapped around her pinky finger.
“Crazy with love,” I teased him, smiling. I loved this man more than my next breath. His arms were propped against the edge of the opening leading up into the attic. I couldn’t help but notice his bulging biceps and the way his t-shirt stretched tight across his broad chest. Yummy! Only the upper half of his body was visible, the rest hidden from view. My eyes regrettably shifted from his to land back on the box before me.
This was the right one. It had to be.
I lifted the lid.
I knew it! I’d finally found it!
“I don’t understand what was so all fired important that it couldn’t have waited until later. I mean, we were standing before our family and friends, a table full of food, and you had to run off before we could make our big announcement.”
“This is special. It has to be on the table,” I insisted, noting the twirling dust motes catching in the sun’s rays shining through the tiny attic window as I took in Nate’s expression of disbelief.
“There’s only junk up here, sweetheart.”
But I shook my head in denial. He didn’t have a clue. Wearing a huge smile, I turned toward him as I lifted my find out of the box. I held it up for him to inspect and closed the distance between us.
When I finally stood before him, I noticed his eyes appeared somewhat glassy. Aww. He was fighting back tears. Nate’s heart was as soft as mine, even though he’d never admit it. “It’s perfect,” he agreed with a smile that stretched from ear to ear, but then his smile abruptly disappeared. “Miley, we really do need to get back to our guests.”
Caught up in my quest and the moment, I’d completely forgotten about all of the family and friends waiting for us downstairs. “Kara warned me if we weren’t back in fifteen minutes, she was sending out a search party.”
Last week, I’d decided to host a party inviting everyone. I’d even included my mom, dad, and brother. I’d also invited Nate’s brother, Miles, adding him and his family to the list. As soon as Miles finished up his shift at the hospital, they planned to stop by. Over the last few months, he and Nate had grown close. It had been impossible for my sister Mia to attend. With the Super Bowl only days away, Bryce was training, and she’d refused to leave him.
I understood, really I did.
When I’d excused myself earlier, I hadn’t missed the surprised look on Nate’s face. He’d stood the same time as I did, obviously thinking it was time for us to make our big announcement, but I just couldn’t, not without ma
king a trip to the attic first. Usually Sierra would have been hot on my heels wanting to know what was going on, but she’d been too preoccupied by Althea, Jagger and his new baby sister, Helen.
Yes, Kara had actually managed to give her and Devon’s child a normal sounding name, and yes, it belonged to a goddess — The Goddess, Helen of Troy. Kara was a little quirky, but I’d grown to love her despite our differences in the past… the same also held true for my relationship with Addie.
Who would have thought that we’d end up being like the three musketeers?
“Hand it to me.” Nate reached and I leaned down, giving him my find. I brushed a kiss against his bearded cheek. He smiled up at me. “Be careful,” he said, his eyes reflecting his concern before he began making his way back down the ladder to the second floor. I sat down near the attic opening to watch him.
Below me, he stood gazing down at the array of pine and bark nestled around the white candle he carefully held in his hand. I’d completely forgotten all about the centerpiece until Nate had leaned over while pouring me a glass of tea and had whispered in my ear about how much his gran would have loved this.
Sheltered within the needles of hunter green were three tiny, red cardinals who sat perched on a single bark branch. It was a simple yet stunning centerpiece his gran had made. My heart swelled with emotion.
When I started down the steps, he held out his hand, smiling up at me. “How did you know?” he asked, and immediately I knew he was referring to the cardinals.
“I remember everything about you, Nathaniel Lee Lucas.”
A few months ago during a family hike, Nate had explained to us the special meaning behind the cardinal. We’d stopped to take a rest when a trio decided to perch upon a branch of one of the trees we’d been sitting under.
Nate’s gran had always believed that whenever a cardinal was spotted, it was a loved one visiting from heaven, so when I’d found the centerpiece weeks ago stored in the attic, I’d broken out in goosebumps. There were somethings in this life that just couldn’t be explained; not science or nature or reason held the answers. Immediately, my thoughts had turned to Nate’s gran, Natalie, and the baby.
It was a perfect tribute and deserved to be a part of our special day. We had a big announcement.
We made our way downstairs holding hands and stood gazing into the kitchen. Around the table sat our family. In such a short time, so much had changed. Over the past few months, I’d managed to forgive my parents for their callous behavior. It was hard, but with Ryder’s death had also come the opportunity for us to reconnect.
At first, I hadn’t been receptive. When I’d been kidnapped, my parents had taken care of Sierra. They’d also babysat while I’d stayed overnight at the hospital with Nate. During that time, they’d come to realize how truly wonderful their granddaughter was, and what they’d missed out on over the years. In short, they’d bonded, but neither my mother’s tears nor my father’s pleading had meant much to me when the time came for us to leave. They hadn’t wanted to be a part of Sierra’s or my life then, so why should I allow them to now? I’d even asked Nate this question.
He’d reminded me that I had forgiven my brother easily enough, so why couldn’t I do the same with my parents? Sure, Matt had royally pissed me off by siding with my mom and dad when Ryder had burglarized their house; he had hurt me more than he would ever know when he’d brushed off my claim of attempted rape. Neither of these incidents had been my fault. It had taken me months before I managed to bring myself to even speak a single word to him again. Despite everything that had happened between us, I’d found myself talking to him regardless, especially during the holidays. The first time had been at Christmas. It wasn’t logical, but he called, and I ended up answering the phone. We’d always been close. I was closer to Matt than with Mia, my own twin.
I guess that’s why his betrayal had hurt so much.
It was hard for me to give up on my entire family, and Matt… well, he’d been the easiest for me to forgive. He’d never been one to visit regularly, but neither was I. We both had a life. His only redeeming grace was that he had taken off the time from work to visit the hospital when Sierra was born. Each year on her birthday, he always managed to send her a gift. He would never win Uncle or Brother of the Year, not by a long shot, but he hadn’t completely cut us out of his life unlike Mother and Father.
I wasn’t perfect. I’d made plenty of mistakes in my past, too, and I’d paid for them dearly. But regardless, no parent should ever turn their back on their own child. Nate was in agreement with me on that one since his own had abandoned him.
A few days later, after Nate was back home and we had settled into our usual routine, Sierra had asked to visit her grandmother. It was then that I’d wanted to sit her down and explain how her grandparents had turned me away, how they had turned their backs on the both of us, but every time I’d opened my mouth… those words just wouldn’t come.
What kind of mother would I be to poison my own child’s mind?
At Nate’s urging and Sierra’s persistence, I’d had no choice but to let go of the past, no matter how painful. Initially it was hard to move forward with the constant hurt weighing me down. Some may disagree. Some may say I’m a fool. How could I let go and move past all of the wrongs I’d been dealt in life? But, it wasn’t as hard as you would think. It was really quiet simple. I did it for my child, and then I did it for me. There was no looking back when the present held everything I’d ever dreamed of and more.
No one noticed our return. Everyone was busy talking amongst themselves. They had started eating without us. Nate’s hand rested at my lower back and I looked up at him and smiled. Cecil was currently telling a story. He was such a windbag. I’d heard this one before. It had my dad and Devon laughing, while Jake shook his head wearing a smirk. Kara sat in between Devon and Jagger. She had a blanket placed over her shoulder and was breastfeeding baby Helen. My mom stood at the kitchen sink refilling a sippy cup for little Althea. Glancing up, Addie noticed us at the door.
“We’re sorry, we started without you.”
Almost immediately, all eyes in the room fell upon us. Well, except for the kids. They could have cared less. “It’s all right. It took a little longer than we expected to find the centerpiece,” Nate responded, and then he smiled down at me. Why did he smile at me like that? I shot him the evil eye and he smirked.
Now everyone would think we were upstairs having sex.
“That is beautiful,” Kara exclaimed. “Where did you find it?”
Nate walked over to the table carrying the centerpiece. He ruffled Sierra’s hair as he squeezed in between her and Jagger to place it in the middle of the table. It was perfect. “Okay?” he asked, peering at me from over his shoulder.
“Perfect, babe,” I said and he winked at me before he bent down, brushing a kiss on the top of Sierra’s head. He came back to me and took one of my hands in his. It was easy to read his expression. I smiled at him, nodding my head in agreement. It was time to share our big news.
I also had a surprise for Nate, and I couldn’t wait to see the look on his face when he found out.
“Can we have everyone’s attention?” he said, and the room fell quiet. All eyes turned our way once more, even the kids this time. “We have some exciting news we want to share—”
Suddenly, there was that unmistakable sound. I wished I’d had a camera to capture the look of disbelief on Nate’s face as we were interrupted.
“Who in the hell is at the door?”
I’d heard the knocking, but decided to ignore it. If it were Miles and his family, they would have come on in. This made twice that Nate had been interrupted; first, by me, and now, by whoever was at the front door. At the rate we were going, I’d be ready to deliver before he could even tell everyone we were pregnant. He rubbed a hand down his face. It was easy to see he was frustrated.
“Go grab a beer from the fridge, and I’ll get the door. It’s okay, babe. Just relax.”
/>
“No, I’ll get it.” he insisted, but I darted past him and turned around, sticking out my tongue at him. “I said sit,” I ordered, and he started laughing.
“She told you,” I heard Devon tease as I started down the hall. That remark was followed by a chorus of rowdy laughter. I guaranteed all the males around the table were giving Nate a rough time.
Hurrying down the hallway, I found Hank barking at the front door. “Good boy,” I said, praising him, then pushed him aside with my leg. He crowded against me. He was over protective. “Quiet.” And though he still stood pressed against my leg trying to get to whoever was outside, at least he was silent.
When I opened the door, a young woman with waist length dark brown hair stood waiting on the front porch. Golden brown eyes flickered in surprise at meeting mine. I didn’t know her, and she didn’t bother to smile, but I did. “Can I help you?” I asked.
“I thought Chase and Chance Logan lived here.” She appeared confused. She was obviously not from Crawley. I would have seen her around.
She was pale and skinny. I couldn’t help but notice the condition of her clothes. Beneath my gaze, she straightened her shoulders and stuck out her chin. Shit, I hope I hadn’t offended her. I recognized that look in her eyes and the proud tilt to her chin. She reminded me of “me.”
She took a step back, her eyes slightly widening. A familiar hand settled at my waist. Nate. He rested his chest against my back. “You all right?” he asked, and I looked up at him and nodded. He always had my back, but he didn’t have to look so intimidating in doing so all of the time.
“She’s looking for Chase and Chance Logan,” I explained.
“It’s fine, I can see they’re not here. I’ll be on my way. I’m sorry I imposed,” the woman said and turned on the heel of one of her faded red Converse high tops and started for the steps.
“Wait,” Nate called out and she paused, looking back.
