by Nhys Glover
She watched Bobby for a reaction. He didn’t give her one.
‘I didn’t even know they existed until I came here a week ago. I thought my father was dead for ten years, but instead, he was living here. He was a werewolf. He was turned in the Crimea, like a lot of soldiers were, so I am told.’
The silence was becoming oppressive now, and she began to think she had made a mistake coming in here. She would probably make it worse by her prattling.
‘When I first found out I just wanted to run away from the monsters. I was terrified to be here, surrounded by them. I kept expecting them to change in front of me, and attack. I knew it couldn’t happen that way. I knew it was only three nights a month, and that they were locked away during that time, but I still wanted to run.’
The lad turned his head, and stared at her, his eyes were filled with terrible pain. She wanted to reach out and take his hand, to comfort him, if she could. But that look told her such comfort would not be welcome.
‘Then Byron gave me a letter my father wrote to me. Suddenly he was the man I remembered, the kind, strong parent I remembered. And I thought – being a monster hadn’t changed him. He was still the same person. And if he was, maybe the others were too.’ She paused, as she remembered the welcome dinner.
‘The second night I was here, when you were recovering, we had a dinner party. We sat around making awful jokes about big bad wolves. Even this lovely old lady called Ellen made a joke about grandmamma having big teeth. She herself did not have a tooth in her head.
‘It was an odd evening, but a pleasurable one. And I saw that werewolves were not so frightening when they were in their human form. They were like everyone else. And they were making the best of their situation. Just like you will, Bobby.’
‘I don’t wannna be one of ‘em! I don’t wanna be a monster!’ The lad exploded with pent up anger and frustration that shocked Phil, momentarily.
‘I know, no one does.’
‘They’re wrong. I ain’t a werewolf. I don’t feel no diff’rent. I’m still me!’ Bobby almost spat the word ‘werewolf’ at her.
‘I know you are. Just like my papa was still himself. It doesn’t hurt, you know. And it’s not a lot of time in your life that you will be changed. It will be like you went to bed, and when you wake up the next morning you’ll be yourself again. You don’t remember being a wolf.’
He stared at her, taking in her words. ‘But I gotta live here. I can’t be with me lass no more. Me life is changed! I can’t go back.’
She reached out, and placed a gentle hand on his. ‘If you took a position on one of the gentries’ lands, you would have left home, and only gone back to visit. It is not so different, except that you will be treated better here than you would there. I’m sorry about your girl, but you can see her when you visit your home. It isn’t far from here, is it?’
‘’Bout nine mile, as the crow flies. Not far, I reckon…’ She could see he was considering the situation more positively now.
‘Me folks won’t want me when they know.’ The last piece of his misery was revealed, and he bent his head in shame.
‘They don’t have to know. You just took a position at Breckenhill Keep because the money was better, and you get to go home to visit on your day’s off. You can even go drinking at your local, just as you always did.’
For the first time she saw real hope in his eyes, and he smiled at her. ‘I’m ‘alf starved, Miss. Might I ‘ave some of that stew now?’
‘Certainly. Do you need me to help you?’ She picked up the chilled stew and a spoon, and smiled her question at him.
‘Nout I can’t do meself, Miss, thanks all the same.’
She passed him the bowl and spoon, and watched him devour the hearty meal with gusto. There was a warm glow around her heart. Somehow, she had been able to say the right thing to help this poor young man, and now he would be able to cope.
This condition was not the end of the world. He could have a life not that much different from what he had always known. In some ways, it might even be better. The equality the inmates shared was far different, and superior to the lot a tenant farmer could ever hope to have. Poverty and an early death would have been his fate before. Now, who knew what might become of him, nine tenths of the time.
She took the empty bowl back to the kitchen, and was gratified to receive heartfelt thanks from Cook. The woman was a hard nut to crack, by temperament, and her condition only added to her taciturn nature. But she cared for the people she cooked for and nursed, that was apparent. And by helping Bobby, she had won Cook a little more over to her side.
Whatever her side was.
CHAPTER TWELVE
‘I want you to go and stay in Harrogate for a few days,’ Byron said, as they sat enjoying their midmorning cup of tea in his study. It had become their ritual to spend this short time alone together, amidst their busy day, and they both had come to look forward to it.
‘Harrogate? Why would I want to go all the way to town? There is nothing I require.’ Phil crossed her arms, and frown at the stony face she had started to know as well as her own.
‘It is the full moon tomorrow night. I would prefer you to be away from here until it is over.’
‘Do you plan on sending me away every month?’ she demanded, feeling her chin come up, as she prepared to do battle.
‘Why not? You are only here for two more months, and you will get no sleep here for those three nights, I can assure you. At least at a lodging house in town you would be able to sleep. You do not have to make your father’s stipulations any more difficult than they are. You do not have to be here for the change.’
‘But I can help. The women have no one to collect their clothes. I could do that for them. It is a little thing, but it would make it easier for them.’
Byron stared at her in astonishment. ‘You would want to do that? You would want to see them as they will be?’
‘I don’t want to see them as werewolves. But I think it would give me a better sense of their experience. If I can see them that way, and still appreciate them when they are back in human form, it will help them to accept themselves, and for me to do the same. I think. I do not know for sure. But what I do know is that I don’t want to be sent away like a cringing coward.’
‘No one would see you that way, I assure you. It was Ellen who suggested it. For your own good.’
Phil jerked her head up in surprise. Ellen had become her favourite resident, in the last few weeks, and she had spent many happy hours reading to the old lady, who was largely bedridden and partially blind. That Ellen wanted her sent away surprised her.
‘She is a dear, but I do not need to be mollycoddled. If I find it too difficult after the first night, I may reconsider going for the other two. But at least, for this first night, I will help. It is what I want to do, Byron.’
She knew he was worried that the sight of them all in wolf form would terrify her so badly that she would want to leave, and never come back. And in all fairness, there was a possibility that that might happen. Just remembering back to that night when the wolves had howled all night long still made her uneasy. But how could she make her choice to stay or go from here, unless she had experienced it all?
That it had become a choice, somewhere in the last weeks, surprised her. When she had read her father’s letter, all she had wanted to do was live up to his assessment of her as a hero, by staying here, and getting to know the place her father had made his own for all those years. There had been no thought of staying on, even though the temptation of Byron had been strong.
But a month had shifted her perspective. This was not the hell hole Byron and the denizens seemed to see it as. The Keep was comfortable, if not warm and welcoming. The same could be said about most of its inmates. They were comfortable enough to get along with, but not warm and welcoming. Except for Byron, Jamey and Ellen… and possibly Cook and the incorrigible Micky… and Bobby, who now followed her around like an adoring puppy. After reviewing
her list, she was forced to concede that maybe it was a warmer place than she had first thought it.
And somewhere in the last weeks she had started to wonder what her life might be like if she stayed here with Byron. What their growing bond might become, if she were to make her home here for good.
There had been no more shared kisses in the last weeks. It was as if they had agreed that any emotional involvement would interfere with the decisions she had to make. If she stayed, it had to be for more than Byron. Otherwise, she would end up feeling frustrated and trapped here, and would then blame him. He didn’t deserve that.
So, yes, there was a decision that needed to be made. And if she was to make the most informed choice, she needed to have a full understanding of what she was committing to.
‘All right then, if I cannot dissuade you. But once the change starts, you are to be away, and locked behind your stout door. I have enough to contend with, without having to worry about you, too.’
‘Agreed. As long as I have a lamp and a good book, I will be content.’
Byron harrumphed at her sceptically, but said no more about it. He had learned just how stubborn she could be in the last weeks. Almost as stubborn as he was. So he would let her have her way in this, as long as she stayed within the safe boundaries he set her.
The other residents were not so easily persuaded. Will was the most verbal of her opponents. But that was not unusual. They had come to expect confrontations from their interactions. It was as if he was protecting Byron from her. It wasn’t jealousy. She didn’t get a sense that he resented Byron’s obvious affection for her. No, it was more that he worried that she would cause him heartbreak. He didn’t trust her not to hurt his friend.
‘You want to see the show, do you lassie? You’re one o’ those who gawks at bloody accidents, are you?’ He had said when he heard she wanted to help get the women settled.
‘I want to assist the women. Jamey or Byron takes your clothes for you, and returns them. The women have no one to do that small thing for them.’
‘And they get used to you helping, and then you’re gone. Then it’s that much harder for them than before.’
‘You seem sure I will leave at the end of my three months.’
‘You’ll go, sooner or later. It’s best for all concerned that you go sooner.’ His wild, grey eyes met hers in a wordless challenge, and for a moment she almost backed down. Then she straightened her shoulders, and met him eye to eye.
‘You are always so sure of what I will do, or what I should do. I will remind you that my father left the Keep to me. And it is my decision whether I stay or go, sooner or later.’
‘As you say, M’ Lady, just remember there are hearts that canna afford to break in this Keep.’ And with that, he had turned on his heel, and stormed out of the room.
As the time drew closer, Phil noticed just how tense everyone became. It was understandable that Bobby, who was going through his first change, would feel tense and fearful of the unknown. But the others were all just as bad. The men snarled at each other, and the women cried. Even the indomitable Cook had a brief weep when her tart burned in the oven.
‘It is always like this for the few days before the full moon. It is like the wolves inside them become restless with waiting. They’ll settle down after tonight,’ Byron told her, as she watched Mary stamp her foot at something Jamey said to her. The boy backed off quickly, before Mary pulled herself together, and scuttled away in embarrassment.
They all ate a late supper and then prepared to go down to the dungeons. Ellen had to be carried down by Will, who wrapped her up warmly, and sat her on a cushion on the stone bench in her cell.
‘She’ll pass the cushion out with her clothes. But at least for the time being she is warm and comfortable,’ Byron informed her, as he stoked the furnace into a blaze of heat that spread down the chilly tunnels to the cells.
She leaned against the wall beside the furnace, and watched the red firelight as it played off the planes of his harsh featured face. A month ago she would have seen something hellish in the scene. Now, it was oddly magnetic.
Refocusing on the situation at hand, she considered Ellen’s situation. ‘I thought you told me becoming a werewolf made a person stronger and healthier. That’s not the case for Ellen.’
‘Actually, it is. She was on her death bed when her daughter, who had been turned without anyone knowing, jumped onto her bed in wolf form. Her son-in-law had been quick off the mark, and took the wolf out with an axe. Unfortunately, the claws broke Ellen’s skin – a mere scratch. But it was enough.’
‘And her daughter turned back into herself as soon as she was dead. That must have been horrific for her husband, as well as Ellen, if they hadn’t known it was her.’
‘Ellen was asleep, drugged with laudanum at the time of the attack. The husband was arrested for murder, but his claims to have attacked a wolf attracted our attention. He is now part of the Special Task Force.’
‘And Ellen?’
‘Ellen began a miraculous recovery. Within days, she was much as she is now. There is not much that can hold back the aging process, and Ellen is very old, but she is in remarkable condition, considering.’
Phil reached out and touched his shirt sleeve. Because of the heat, he had taken off his coat, and unbuttoned the neck of his shirt. He looked as wild as a wolf himself. It was oddly appealing.
He looked down at her hand, and then up to meet her eyes. Their dark depths were filled with questions for which she had no answers, so she drew her fingers back, and clamped them onto the skirt of her summer dress. The heat was affecting her, too. There was a trickle of perspiration running down between her breasts. It made her think of the trickle of rose water over her naked body that first day, and the way Byron had looked at her then. How he had devoured her then.
But that thought was driven away by Bobby making his way down the steep stairs behind them. His look of utter terror filled her with compassion, and she went to the lad. Placing a gentle hand on his cheek, she looked into his eyes.
‘Just a really uncomfortable place to sleep, Bobby. That’s all. Before you know it, you’ll be awake, and ready for breakfast. I promise I’ll have porridge ready. Nice and hot, with brown sugar and plenty of fresh milk.’
The young man’s eyes lost most of their terror, and he smiled. Then, with a gentle nudge from Will, who had followed him down the stairs, he started along the tunnel.
‘I’m going to help Ellen get undressed,’ she said, turning back to Byron in relief. Bobby’s fear was contagious. Only the sight of Byron, strong and confident, saved her from spinning into panic.
‘That would be good. Mary usually helps her, but that means she has to be unclothed first, so Mary has time to get to her own cell and undressed after her. It’s only a matter of minutes, but that stone bench is unforgiving on the flesh of an old lady. The less time she has to bear it, the better.’
Phil nodded, and hurried off down the tunnel to the left, where the women were housed. Already the seven women were in their cells, pacing anxiously. They all looked up at her as she entered the cavern, and their expressions were mixed. Some seemed pleased to see her, like Ellen and Cook. Others were resentful, like Charlotte. A few seemed embarrassed that she was to witness their process.
Phil lowered her eyes and hurried into Ellen’s cell. The others began to undress. She had never seen other women naked before. Even at school they had all washed or changed out of each other’s sight. Her hands began to shake, as she gently eased the old lady’s nightdress over her head.
Briefly, she let her eyes meet Ellen’s, as she folded the cloth. Those eyes were filled with affection and understanding. The old lady nodded her head, and whispered, ‘Thank you.’ Looking down, to preserve her privacy, Phil left the cell, with clothes and pillow in hand.
The first time she turned a lock was awful. It made her feel like a villain. She was even more aware that this was a medieval dungeon, and she now played the role of gaol
er. But determined not to be weakened by what she had agreed to do, she strode along the length of the cavern, collecting neatly folded clothing, and turning and removing keys, until all the women were safely locked away.
The air around her seemed to crackle with strange energy. Out of her peripheral vision she saw women lying down on their benches. Then, before she had a chance to make it into the tunnel, the first transition happened. Ellen, in the cell closest to the tunnel entrance, suddenly morphed from old lady to large, shaggy beast. The shift was so sudden and so dramatic, that Phil was brought up short, her head jerking around so she could see properly what had just happened.
Sure enough, where moments before a naked old lady had lain, a grey wolf now reclined, its head on its paws. She couldn’t hold back the gasp of shock at the sight. Then, as she glanced back at the other cells, she saw the shift taking place everywhere.
In what seemed no more than a blink of an eye, what had been a dank cavern of imprisoned, naked women of different ages, was now a feral zoo caging wild beasts much bigger than she anticipated. They all lay still, as if sleeping.
‘Phil, come on. You must leave before they come to themselves, and start to be aware of their imprisonment.’ She heard Byron calling to her from the other end of the short tunnel.
With one last, amazed look, she hustled toward the welcome sound of Byron’s voice. Then, with his arm bracing hers, she hurried up the stone stairs, back to the real world.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Byron closed the heavy door to the cellar behind him, and leaned against it. He looked down at her, searching her face in the lamplight, for any sign of what she was thinking and feeling about what she had just witnessed.
‘It is quite shocking,’ she managed to get out, as she found herself leaning in against his strong, sturdy body. ‘I thought I was prepared. But nothing could prepare you for that.’
