‘Do you have Wi-Fi here?’ Eva asked as the barman placed a fresh glass of hot whiskey in front of her.
‘Yeah, of course. The password is booze.’
Eva sniggered. ‘I like it. Very, um, apt. I might be here a while. Do you think I could switch to a white wine spritzer and keep them coming, please?’
‘Absolutely. I’ll set up a tab at the bar for you. Take all the time you need.’
Eva pulled her phone out of her pocket, smiling as she noticed her battery was almost at full charge, and settled herself comfortably against the back of the brown leather bench seat. She searched through endless Wikipedia articles about being a donor recipient, clicking from one link to the next. Devouring as much information as she could. She Googled the success rates and case studies; pros, cons, and aftereffects. She was drinking in the knowledge. The barman was as good as his word; keeping her supplied with delicious spritzers and minimal disruption to her reading.
Eva was finally drawn back into the moment by the flickering of the lights and someone shouting, ‘Last orders.’
She pulled on her coat, threw her phone back into her pocket, and left some cash under an empty glass on the table, hoping she’d calculated correctly. She made her way back out to the street, trying to figure out where in the hell she was. It was late, dark, and cold. The last thing she wanted to do was ask someone for directions. It didn’t look like the nicest part of the city and she didn’t want to become a mugged tourist statistic. She hailed the first taxi that drove by and crossed her fingers that she had enough cash left to cover the fare.
Back at the hotel, she raced past reception. She didn’t wait for the elevator but charged up the huge staircase in the centre of the lobby instead. She just wanted to get to her room, whip out her phone again, and continue reading up on all the articles she’d saved.
Eva came to a sudden stop outside her bedroom door, actually choking on a gulp of air. She coughed hard. ‘Julian. Oh, my God. You’re here. You’re actually here.’
Before she knew it, her hand had flown of its own accord and slapped him across the face. ‘That’s for disappearing without a trace.’
Julian rubbed his red check and smiled deliciously. He didn’t look surprised. Just amused. He’d obviously anticipated how she’d react. Eva didn’t know which was more infuriating, that he was always second-guessing her, or that he always got it right.
‘Fair enough. I deserved that,’ Julian said, taking his hand down from his face.
Eva couldn’t stay mad. The relief at seeing him was overwhelming. She didn’t know what to do with her hands; they were on her face, her heart, back at her face again. Shaking. Finally, she wrapped them around his neck and held him tight.
‘Can we go inside?’ Julian whispered, his lips brushing against her ear.
‘Yeah, sure.’ Eva fidgeted in her bag for her key, peeved that her head was so fuzzy from the wine.
Chapter 16
Eva slipped off her coat and dropped that along with her bag onto the messy bed. Julian was instantly behind her. He picked back up her coat, turned it upside down, and shook it. The pamphlet fell out of the inside pocket and onto the tossed white sheet. He dropped the coat and picked up the pamphlet all at the same time.
‘Spying on me, Miss Andrews,’ he accused.
Eva flopped down onto the edge of the bed. Her legs were weary. She’d forgotten to eat today and her stomach reminded her with angry growls. She was in no mood for one of Julian’s interrogations. ‘Mia gave it to me actually. So, no. I wasn’t spying on you.’
‘So you were around in Mia’s for tea and scones, then?’
‘Well no, obviously not. I went there to see if she knew where you were.’
‘So you were spying on me.’ Julian tilted his head.
‘Jesus, Julian. I can ask Mia if she’s seen you if I like. You don’t own her…or me for that matter. You made that very clear at the hospital when you dumped my ass and then disappeared without a trace.’
‘I’m sorry.’ Julian’s eyes darkened. Maybe he was angry he’d had to apologise. But Eva felt she deserved it. She wasn’t backing down.
‘You fucked me, and then you practically kick me out the door. I went back to the hospital the next day only to discover you’d left. You didn’t even give us a chance to talk things through. You’re giving me such mixed signals; I feel like I’m losing my mind. I go from being so afraid I might lose you, to so relieved you’re okay. For what? Just so you can have a change of heart and push me away. You’re not playing fair, Julian.’
‘Miss Andrews, you’re the one who keeps mentioning games. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re the one attempting to win here.’
‘Win what? You? Are you my prize, Julian? Well then, the game is flawed. It’s FUCKING flawed. You give me everything; money, clothes, a great job. You’ve even given me back my family. But you won’t give me the one thing I want. The only thing I want… I want you. So no Julian, there’s no winner. The game sucks and I lose.’
‘We’ve been over this,’ Julian said calmly.
‘No, we haven’t. You’ve just told me that you don’t want to be together. I didn’t get a say.’
‘I never said I didn’t want to be with you. If you’re going to quote me, I’d appreciate if you got it right. I said we couldn’t be together.’
‘It’s the same FUCKING thing, Julian,’ Eva shouted.
Julian’s look was smouldering. Lust and aggression combined to make him irresistible to her. Her heart was racing and tiny beads of perspiration gathered on her palms. She wanted to slap him across his smug face again. Then pull his clothes off and fuck him until he shouted her name. Instead, she snatched the pamphlet out of his hand, tearing a corner in the process, and held it up. Waving it in frustration.
‘Are you going to tell me what the hell is going on?’ she said, trying and failing to keep her voice down.
‘Do I need to?’ Julian stepped away, creating a little distance between them. ‘Clearly you’ve gone behind my back and figured it all out for yourself.’
‘You didn’t leave me any choice. You weren’t going to tell me. You were saying good-bye at the hospital and I didn’t even know. You just left me, and I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again. Did you really expect me to just accept that? You had to know that I’d want answers. Anyone would.’
Julian didn’t say anything, but he watched her with a burning intensity that sent a fire of desire racing across her skin.
‘Why are you here, Julian? Is it just because you are angry with me for trying to find out the truth? Or have you changed your mind about us.’
‘If you had questions, Eva, you should have come to me. Instead of hoping the internet would solve your problems.’
‘How could I come to you? I had no idea where you were. And now who’s spying on who? How do you know my internet search history? Do you have my phone tapped or something?’ Eva knew that sounded a bit too CSI as soon as she said it.
Julian sighed. ‘You were using your work phone. The server is monitored.’
Eva winced. Dammit. ‘Fine. I’ll use my personal phone from now on.’
‘Okay.’ Julian shrugged, exaggerating his indifference, and it was infuriating.
‘While you’re at it, would you please refrain from trying to extort information from my friends and staff,’ Julian said.
‘Anne doesn’t know anything. And Anthony won’t answer his phone,’ Eva snapped, still angry at his shrugging.
‘That’s because their loyalties lie with me, Eva. I only work with people I can trust.’
‘Have you told them not to speak to me?’ Eva asked, her shock more obvious than she’d like.
‘No. I didn’t have to. They know me well enough to know when I don’t want something discussed.’
‘And I don’t know you well. Is that what you’re trying to say?’
‘You’re putting words in my mouth again, Miss Andrews. I’d much rather you put your pussy there.�
�
‘Julian, stop it.’ Eva threw her hands to the side. ‘You can’t change the subject with sex talk.’
Eva was lying to him and herself; her mind was instantly flooded with images of her straddling his face while he licked her good.
‘They’re your employees, Julian. They’re going to do what you say. Their paycheck depends on it.’ Eva copied Julian’s shrugging.
Julian closed his eyes and his lips twitched. Eva regretted it as soon as she’d said it. She knew Anne Cartwright was much more to Julian than just his housekeeper. She was a mother figure to him. And Eva suspected Anthony was the nearest thing to a brother that Julian had ever known.
‘I’m sorry,’ Eva said reaching her hands out to pull him close to her.
Julian caught her wrist just before her fingers touched him and threw her arm back at her. He looked at her with burning eyes. ‘Don’t apologise for speaking the truth, Eva. We’ve discussed this before. Apologising when you’re not in the wrong makes you weak. Weakness is unattractive.’
Eva’s pity for him was instantly wiped, replaced with exasperation at how cutting his remarks could be.
‘You’re right. They are my employees. But they don’t respect me because I demand it. They respect me because I’ve earned it. You cannot just demand what you desire. You have to earn the right to it,’ Julian explained dryly.
‘What?’ The wine was swishing around Eva’s belly and her head was fuzzy. It was making it hard to concentrate. ‘Are you talking about us?’
‘I’m talking about all things,’ Julian replied quickly.
‘You’re talking in fucking riddles. I shouldn’t have to beg you for information. I’m your girlfriend. Or was. For all of five minutes until you went all bi-fucking-polar on me. I deserve to know what’s going on.’
‘Exactly. You were my girlfriend. You’re now just my employee and my previous comment stands.’
‘Okay.’ Eva tried to hide her pain at his impassive remark. ‘Then I quit. Consider this my notice.’
‘Excuse me?’ Julian’s eyes widened.
Eva smiled. ‘You heard me, Mr. Harte. I quit.’
‘I expect the termination of the contract by either party, employer or employee, to be served in writing, Miss Andrews. You know that.’ Julian’s stare was burning into her and she suspected he was undressing her in his mind.
‘Well, my word was good enough for you the last time I quit, Julian. You’re just bullshitting and playing the fancy big shot CEO now to piss me off.’
‘Must I remind you, Miss Andrews, that you are currently contracted with HTK Associates. I am little more than a silent partner there. Your resignation must be rendered with Mr. Thompson, not me.’
‘Bullshit. You own ninety-six percent of the holdings, Julian. I checked. That doesn’t seem very silent to me.’ Eva matched the intensity of his stare.
‘Very thorough research. I admire that,’ Julian praised. ‘Someone with your cutting business sense must understand you have to resign IN FUCKING WRITING.’
Eva’s fists clenched and her shoulders tensed. She raced to the bathroom, pulled a couple of sheets of toilet paper off the roll, hurried back into the bedroom, and grabbed a pen off the nightstand.
‘Here,’ she snarled, scribbling two words on the toilet paper and shoving the paper at Julian.
He took it and read it out loud with mild amusement. ‘I quit.’
‘There.’ Eve tossed her head to one side. ‘Now it’s in fucking writing.’
‘Much appreciated, Miss Andrews. And your choice of paper is very appropriate.’
Eva sighed, hopping mad. ‘Why is that, Mr. Harte?’
‘Because I plan to wipe my arse with it.’
‘Nice, Julian. Very mature.’ Eva groaned.
‘You can’t quit. You need your job. How are you going to survive in New York with no money? It’s an expensive city,’ Julian said cockily.
‘I’m not going back to New York. I’ve told you. I’m staying in Dublin.’
‘Eva, this is not open for negotiation,’ Julian said, stepping forward.
‘You’re right. It’s not. I am staying here and there’s nothing you can do about it. I will type a proper letter of resignation and forward it to Mr. Thompson’s office in the morning.’
‘Eva, you’re being irrational.’ Julian moved closer.
‘No. I’m being decisive,’ Eva argued. ‘This is my decision to make. I’ve done what you’ve told me before. I’ve gone back. I’ve met my mother and my sister, who incidentally hates me by the way, and now I’m doing what I want to do.’
‘And throwing up your job and staying in this pissy wet country is what you want to do? You want to stay here?’ Julian’s eyes pinched.
‘You’re here,’ Eva replied softly, looking into his eyes.
‘But your mother and sister are there.’
‘Mom and Melissa are grown women. I can visit them. There’s not going to be a quick fix to our problem, Julian. It won’t make a difference which side of the Atlantic I’m on.’
‘Eva. I said no,’ Julian growled with his lips barely parted.
‘You’re not listening to me. You can push me away all you like, but I’m not leaving. Even if we’re not together, I’m staying here…because you’re here.’
‘And what if I’m not always here?’ Julian said, finally sitting on the bed beside Eva.
Eva’s gut twisted. Was he just messing with her words or did he really mean that? She looked at the pamphlet in her shaking fingers. Her body language, her tone, everything changed. There was no anger left in her. ‘Julian, how sick are you? I’m begging you. Just tell me.’
‘Very,’ Julian answered without hesitation.
Eva’s breath caught in her throat; like Julian had reached his hand into her chest and pulled the air out of her lungs.
‘Okay. Thank you. Can we talk about it?’ Eva asked, trying to stay calm on the outside, at least.
‘No.’
‘Are you going to die?’
Julian’s nose scrunched. ‘That’s talking about it, Eva.’
‘Please just answer the question,’ Eva begged. ‘Are you?’
‘We all die at some point,’ Julian simplified.
‘That’s not what I meant.’
‘I know what you meant. I’ve told you this is not open for discussion but you just won’t drop it. If you keep asking questions I don’t want to answer, then I am going to give you answers you don’t want to hear.’
‘Who else have you told not to give me answers? The hospital? Taking pointers from your wife, I see.’ That came out more bitchy than Eva intended and she regretted her tone.
‘Stop calling her that.’
‘Why?’
Julian was on his feet in front of Eva before the question had finished leaving her mouth. He shot her a don’t-fuck-with-me look and spun her around to lean over the edge of the bed. ‘Because the only woman I ever want to call my wife is you.’
Eva flipped herself back around, her stare meeting his. His eyes burned into her with an intensity that matched her own. She really regretted the last couple of glasses of wine now. ‘Did you really just say that?’
‘Yes.’
‘You told me that you’d never marry me.’
‘And at the time, I thought that,’ Julian admitted. ‘But things change. I’ve changed. Now I’m so fucking in love with you that I can’t see straight.’
Eva pushed her hands against Julian’s shoulders and shoved him away from leaning over. She stood up and paced the room with her hands on her head. ‘So you love me enough to want to marry me, but not enough to tell me what is going on.’
‘I won’t tell you because I love you,’ Julian said, watching her every step.
Eva swallowed hard. She was crying on the inside but no tears were falling. Her frustration and confusion were overwhelming them. ‘That’s not how stuff like that works, Julian.’
‘It’s how I work.’
‘It doesn�
�t matter anyway. This conversation is stupid,’ Eva said, suddenly standing still. ‘You’re still married to Mia.’
‘I’ve told you. It’s just documentation. It can be tidied up at any time.’ Julian walked towards her.
‘So you’re going to divorce her?’
Julian pulled a folded white envelope out of his back jeans pocket and placed it on the nightstand next to them. Eva couldn’t miss her name in bold capitals on the front.
‘What is that?’ Her eyes moved from watching Julian to staring at the envelope.
‘It’s for you. Anthony has been holding on to it for me,’ Julian explained.
‘What?’
‘I asked him to give it to you when I was going into Vertigo. I asked him to give it to you in case…’
The tears that wouldn’t fall before trickled down Eva’s cheek now. ‘In case you didn’t make it back out?’
Julian nodded.
‘Why now?’ Eva asked, afraid of the answer.
‘Because it’s the right time. Don’t read it now. Later. When I’m gone.’
Eva tried to hide the sting of disappointment. ‘Can’t you stay?’
Julian shook his head.
‘Can’t you stay even for a little while? We could order some room service. I’m starving.’
‘I’m hungry, too,’ Julian said.
‘Okay great. I’ll get the menu.’
‘I don’t think the hotel can offer anything to satisfy my appetite.’ Julian’s coquettish grin sent a tingle down Eva’s spine.
‘Oh. That kind of hungry.’
Chapter 17
Eva walked back to the bed. Julian was still standing beside it. He didn’t move. Eva stopped just in front of him and kicked off her shoes, instantly emphasising the height difference between them. She reached around his back, her elbows tucked close above his waist and her hands reached to clasp his shoulders. She felt his deep exhale as his breath danced across the top of her head that she tucked under his chin.
‘I’m sorry, Eva. I tried to stay away from you, but I just fucking couldn’t.’
‘I’m glad you couldn’t.’
Queen of Harte's Page 10
