by Dani McLean
Fuck, I was so screwed.
19
Jackson
It had been weeks since my conversation with Addison Michaels, and there was some buzz going around that he was ready to offer the role to someone, so when Terry called me, I hoped he had good news.
He didn’t.
“Bad news, buddy. Apparently, Addison’s got someone in mind for the part you wanted. Word’s getting around that he’s not taking auditions until he’s spoken to his first choice.”
Damnit. “That’s ok, Terry. Thanks for letting me know. There’ll be other roles.”
“That’s the spirit! Exactly. Want me to say yes to the teen series?”
I grimaced. I’d really hoped that getting the role in Subversion would take that choice out of my hands. “How soon do I need to give them an answer?”
“We probably don’t want to wait much longer, but they’re definitely keen to get you on board. Why? Are you trying to get them to up the offer?”
“Not exactly. It’s not that I don’t appreciate the gig, but do you think you could canvas for some other options? Ones more aligned with the Michael’s role?”
“Of course! I’ve been hoping you’d say that. What changed, man?”
“Just got some good advice.”
“I shouldn’t be worried about my job, should I?” Terry asked jokingly.
“Definitely not.”
“Leave it with me, J.”
Disappointed, I returned to set. It wasn’t like something else wouldn’t come along, but damn, getting Parker would have been good. I knew I could bring something special to it, and while Addison hadn’t exactly been responsive when I’d met him, he had seemed interested in my ideas. Unless that was just his way of letting me down easy. I wondered if he’d already known then who he wanted in it.
I hoped he didn’t think I was going to let this part go without a fight.
Sunday, I found myself surrounded by more tulle and satin than I’d ever thought possible. It was two weeks away from my sister’s big day, and apparently, now was the only time Sarah could find to schedule her last dress fitting.
Which meant, instead of our usual Sunday tradition of bacon and eggs, I was sipping terrible shop coffee and starving. Sarah had promised me she’d thank me by taking me out to brunch after. I agreed because not only was I the best big brother ever—a fact I told Sarah at least three times that morning—but also because I normally cooked.
“You’re my only big brother; you’re my only brother, period, so that’s cheating. Also, you can’t proclaim yourself to be the best. That’s my job.” Her voice was muffled by the thick curtain of the dressing room, but her sarcastic tone was loud and clear.
“Have you decided on where we’re going for brunch yet?”
“No, I’ll google it.”
Her head popped out from behind the curtain, “Don’t you know what’s good around here? We’re right by your apartment.”
“I haven’t really bothered to check anything out yet.”
She rolled her eyes and disappeared again. “You’ve lived there for three years already. Stop acting like it’s temporary. Just buy the place. At least then I’ll know where to send your mail.”
We’d had this conversation a few times since I’d moved back home for the show, but how could I? It was hard putting roots down anywhere because my next job could be anywhere. Yes, having a more permanent home where my family was would be great, but it was a big decision.
You’d barely believe I was the older sibling the way she acted sometimes, but I was grateful that Sarah did her best to keep me grounded.
“And what if my next job is in LA or Vancouver?”
“Then you can rent it, or Matt and I can housesit, I don’t know. You can figure it out when it happens.” The curtain pulled back, and she stepped out, the softness of the silk dress clashing with the scowl she directed towards me. “What is so wrong about making plans?”
It was the first time I’d seen the dress outside of some screenshots Sarah had texted me months ago. “Wow, Sarah …”
She looked down, smoothing her hands over the material. “It’s ok?”
“You look stunning.”
She blinked rapidly, holding her tears at bay, and I felt a lump form in my throat. “Thanks, Jace.” She turned to the mirror and let out a long breath. “I can’t believe it’s happening.”
“Matt’s a lucky man.”
She turned back to me. “You deserve this, too, someday.” I started to respond, but Sarah waved me off. “I know. You never pictured yourself as the marrying type.”
And the thing was, she was right.
But lately, something had shifted.
In the past, if I gave marriage any thought, it was only to dismiss it as a possibility for far down the road—something to consider once life felt more stable. Once I was in the right place to be the partner I wanted to be.
It wasn’t so long ago that I had needed to take any odd job to pay my rent, including a particularly awful period where my parents had forced me to take money from them so I could continue auditioning. I owed them a lot, literally and figuratively, and I intended to pay back every cent with interest.
So how could I even start thinking about starting my own family?
Which was why it was easier to say I wasn’t interested in marriage than have to answer why I was still single constantly.
Keep things simple. Nothing personal. Nothing lasting.
But with Audrey …
“Actually …”
“What?!” Her shout echoed in the small shop, sending some worried glances in our direction. Sarah smiled as the dressmaker came over to see if everything was alright, and then they both disappeared behind the curtain again so Sarah could get back into her regular clothes.
It wasn’t until we were seated at a nearby cafe, waiting for our meals, that Sarah brought it up again. I was surprised it had taken her this long, to be honest.
“Ok, where is Jackson, and what have you done with him? Are you seriously thinking of getting married? Who is she? You haven’t already eloped, have you?”
“Calm down. I don’t mean right now. It’s just something that I’m not necessarily opposed to anymore. I don’t want a whole circus, but I get it, I think. Wanting it.”
She brought her hands to her mouth, trying to contain her glee. “I think I might cry! Does this mean you’ve changed your mind about helping us put together the favors for the wedding?”
“Actually, I’ve heard you could save a lot by not bothering with favors.”
“Did Mom tell you to say that? She’s been going on and on about how tacky she thinks it is.”
“She does? I thought it would be right up her alley. She loves all that traditional stuff.”
“I know! That’s what I said.” She raised her cup, then stilled. “So, wait. If it wasn’t Mom, then who? Since when do you know anything about weddings?”
Shit, she had me there.
Her eyes narrowed, suspicious. “What aren’t you telling me?”
“Nothing. It was just something a friend told me.”
“A friend friend?”
Moments like this reminded me of the age gap between us. “If you’re asking me whether I’m seeing someone, then the answer is yes.” Not exactly the whole truth, but now was hardly the time to explain to Sarah what was going on with Audrey and me. Mostly because I barely knew myself.
“Are you sleeping with a married woman?” She sounded so scandalized that I stifled a laugh.
“No, fuck no. Geez, Sarah, think a little better of me.”
Her relief was evident. “No, I do. That’s what shocked me. Ok, so what then? A wedding planner? A celebrant? A singer who does weddings on the side? I haven’t been keeping up with your Twitter mentions.”
“It’s none of those things. Forget I said anything.”
“Yeah, no chance. Come on, tell me about her.”
“It’s … I’m trying not to jinx it. She’s
special.”
She was silent for so long I almost wondered if she hadn’t heard me, then she blinked and said, “Huh.”
“Go on.”
“What?”
“Say it.”
“I’ve never seen you like this before. You really like her, don’t you?”
“I really do. I’m just not sure how she feels.”
“You’re in so much trouble.”
“Oh, I know. I definitely know.”
“So when do I get to meet this miracle woman who is amazing enough to change my brother’s mind about relationships?”
“Ok, calm down. You don’t have to act like my wanting a relationship is some miracle, and secondly, you are not meeting her.”
“Firstly, yes it is, and second, good luck stopping me.”
“Sarah,” I said, firm.
“Jackson,” she mimicked.
I huffed a sigh, knowing there was no winning.
While Sarah wasn’t the type to actually stalk someone, there would be no getting her off my case until I relented. And ok, maybe I actually liked the idea of having them meet. Sarah was my closest friend, and family was important to me, and Audrey was quickly becoming someone I could see myself being with long term.
No matter how often I told myself it wasn’t going to be anything more, that Audrey only wanted something casual and it wasn’t likely going to last, I couldn’t help the way I felt. I was falling for her. I couldn’t stop it.
I was going crazy trying to work out what was going on between us. I liked Audrey more than I had liked someone in a really long time, so yes, sue me for wanting to introduce the two most important women in my life to each other.
And I hoped that if they met and liked each other, it would help Audrey see that we could work as something more.
Two birds, one stone.
Or possibly, a complete and utter disaster.
“Fine. How about next weekend? Our usual Sunday brunch at my place.”
“Wow, really? You barely even put up a fight there. She really has got you wrapped around her finger.”
“Oh, look, our food’s here, eat up.”
“Subtle, Jace.” she chuckled. “Now, I really can’t wait to meet her.”
20
Jackson
The light that crept into the room between half-drawn shades woke me. I wondered for a dazed moment why I’d never had this issue before, then realized it was because I’d rolled away from my usual spot on the bed, the reason for which was curled up next to me.
I’d had Audrey in my bed many times now but never like this.
Any nights we’d spent together had ended long before morning, one of us heading home to sleep in our own bed, something I’d be grateful for when we first met. I rarely let anyone stay at my place in the past.
But with Audrey, I found it hard not to want more of her. More of her time, more of her body, more of her mind.
And ever since that night where we’d done nothing more than talk in a bath full of bubbles, I’d wanted to wake up next to her.
Last night had given me hope that she wanted the same thing since all it had taken was a gentle kiss and a quiet “stay with me” to convince her.
I propped myself on one elbow to get a better look at her just because I could.
She faced me, curled on her side, still asleep, burrowed under the covers. It was adorable.
She was even more beautiful like this, if that was possible. Her hair was in disarray against the pillow, and my fingers ached to run through it, to sort out the tangles and smooth it down, but it would likely wake her, so I settled with gently moving a wayward strand away from her face. There was a small wrinkle embossed across her cheek where the pillowcase had marked her during the night.
I couldn’t hold myself back. The soft expression of her face and that damn little crease called out to me, and I leaned down to kiss it.
Her smile formed beneath my lips when I moved to capture them with my own.
“Mmm, morning,” she said between lazy kisses.
But I wasn’t interested in talking.
We moved slowly, more instinct than action, skin on skin and warmth and closeness, intimate in a way I couldn’t quite name. Our kisses were messy, just languid slides of lips against lips, cheeks, skin.
Audrey shifted onto her stomach, reaching and pulling until I was blanketed over her, arching and rolling her ass against my dick, the only part of me more awake than the rest.
It was a slow slide between her thighs, and when she hitched her hips just right, I was fucking the hot, wet warmth of her, and fuck, it was incredible. We were touching, everywhere we could, head to toe, in and out and around each other. My entire existence was focused on her.
How we fit together, how close we were. How close I wanted to be.
And she was wet, so wet, slicking me up between her thighs. It was tight and hot, wet and velvet smooth. The way she curled into and around me, her hands pulling me closer, arching into me. It made me protective, possessive of her.
“Everything you do feels amazing,” Audrey said as she moved with me, rolling steady, our bodies finding a rhythm. When I brushed against her clit, she pushed back, asking for, wanting more. “Wish we could stay like this.”
“Yes, stay here. Stay with me” I felt incoherent, words breathed out against the slope of her shoulder.
Audrey was the same, quick breaths that were soft moans half lost into the pillow, interlaced with pleas of “I’m so close” and “Hold me” and “I want you.”
My forearms shook with the effort of holding myself up. “You have me.” Forever.
“Oh, right there, yes.”
“Fu—” Whatever I was about to say was lost as we came together, every inch of us pressed tightly together.
The sun was more demanding by the time we finally pulled ourselves from the bed, bone-weary and sated from pleasure.
Her stomach growled. “Hungry?” I asked.
“Starving.” Her lips curled into a wide smile. “I could run down to the bakery on the corner, grab us something?”
“Ah. About that.” I tried to sound casual when I was anything but. “Would you like to stay and have brunch with Sarah and me? She’d really like to meet you.”
I’d really like you to stay.
Caught off guard, she chewed on her lip as she slipped back into her underwear.
“Ok.” She finally said. “Do you think she’ll like me?”
“Of course. Probably more than she likes me.” Audrey rewarded me with a bright laugh and a relaxed shift in her shoulders.
“Is there anything I need to know before I meet her?”
I’d just finished pulling a pair of jeans on, t-shirt in hand, but I drop it onto the bed in preference of taking her face in my hands and kissing her, languid and deep.
When I came up for air, I stayed close, touching my forehead to hers. “Just be you.”
It was the right thing to say because she relaxed in my arms, a happy little sigh escaping her, and I clamp my lips shut before I said something ridiculous like, “be mine,” or “I love you.”
The buzzer goes, alerting us to Sarah’s arrival.
“Are you sure about this? I could sneak you out,” I jokingly said, relieved when she pushed me out of the bedroom so she could finish getting dressed.
I stepped outside the apartment before Sarah reached the door because it had just occurred to me that I hadn’t really told her that Audrey and I weren’t officially dating, and if Sarah goes into full sister mode, we might not be talking after today either.
Sarah’s face contorted into confusion when she spotted me. “What are you doing hovering outside your door like a weirdo?”
I kept my voice quiet. “Ok, I need to ask you to do something, and you need to be cool about it.”
“What did you do?”
I was aware that we were loitering outside my doorway where any of my neighbors could walk by and hear us, but I was also not about to have this c
onversation inside my apartment where Audrey was, so I sped through it as quickly as I could. “I really like this woman, and I love you, but I need you to try not to give her a hard time—”
“Why would I—”
“Because you’re looking out for me. And I appreciate that; I do. But she didn’t know you were coming over until about five minutes ago, and this is still very new, and I haven’t told her that I want more yet.”
Sarah's lips formed a hard line, and she blew a stern breath out of her nose. “Dear God, you’re such an idiot.” And then she stormed past me to the apartment.
Well, this should be fun.
“Oh, hi.” I closed the door to find Sarah walking up to Audrey, who was sitting nervously at the kitchen island.
Sarah bounded over to Audrey and reached her hand out, “I’m Sarah, Jackson’s little sister.”
They shook. “Audrey. Nice to meet you.”
“You, too.” I watched with apprehension as Sarah casually took up the stool next to Audrey. “So, how did you two meet?”
I made my way into the kitchen, busying myself with brewing a fresh pot, and interrupted to save Audrey from answering. “Anyone want coffee?”
But Audrey didn’t need saving. “A friend of mine runs The Basement bar downtown and recognized him when he came in one night. Messaged me to get there and then basically set us up.”
“You must have been surprised to get there to find a celebrity,” Sarah said. I cleared my throat in warning, which Sarah ignored. So much for not giving her a hard time.
Audrey reddened. “Actually, I didn’t know who he was.”
Sarah laughed gleefully. “Oh, my god! I like you so much better already.”
I set coffee in front of both of them. “Be nice,” I directed to Sarah, who rolled her eyes and turned back to Audrey. Don’t scare her off was what I wanted to say but couldn’t.
