“Welcome to you all,” said the Grand Master. “Now, if you will wait with me for but a moment, Brother Jackman will step into the cloakroom to don his vestments of office.”
Lawrence bowed to us and disappeared into a curtained room. I stood holding Alex’s arm. I smiled to the Grand Master. He nodded his head and smiled back. I didn’t know what to say. I supposed that nice horns would have been appropriate. I was proud of the fact I hadn’t snickered when the Grand Master presented himself. I almost lost it when Lawrence stepped from the cloakroom wearing a similarly silly outfit.
Lawrence wore a robe of scarlet. He also wore a hat that looked like it was made of roadkill. It had two large horns protruding from either side of it. Around his neck he wore many gold chains and pendants.
“Grand Master Wilkins,” Lawrence announced reverently. “I stand before you on my wedding day fully prepared and gladly resigned to perform the Man’s Ceremony.”
“You have explained nothing to the initiate or your witnesses?” the Grand Master challenged.
“Nothing.”
“Then, in the interests of brotherhood and the bind which cannot break, I invite you now to explain what we are about to do.”
“Lawrence, what’s happening here?” Agatha exclaimed. She wasn’t thrilled with the hat either. Maybe she was worried he would wear it to the wedding.
“Agatha, it’s alright. You’re here at the ceremonial hall of my fraternity so that I can perform a marriage ritual called the Man’s Ceremony. It was the feeling of the brothers several decades ago that traditional weddings focus on the bride and her sacrifices, and that there should be a separate ceremony in which the man must prove his love for the woman who is about to marry him. We are about to take part in that ceremony before a hall of my brothers. Chloe and Alex are to be my witnesses. Once I’m done, you will either declare that you accept what I have to offer along with all my mistakes and weaknesses, or refuse me.”
“But Lawrence, I already accept you. This isn’t necessary.”
“It is required by my fraternity.”
Agatha thought for a moment. I bit my lip trying to interpret the thoughts that were going through her mind based solely on her facial expression. She played it cool, giving little away.
“Alright, but first, why all this secrecy?”
“Agatha, we are a secret fraternity. We do not publish our ceremonies. We do not advertise our events.”
“And now I must say a few words,” the Grand Master interrupted. “As Brother Jackman said, we are a secret fraternity who likes to keep their secrets close. I must ask for your promise to not repeat anything that you see or hear today. I ask you to swear by whatever you hold dear. Ms. Boston?”
“I do,” I managed without giving the question much thought.
“Mr. Lincoln?”
“Me too, I suppose. I mean, I do.”
“And do you stand witness this day to what is about to happen?”
“We do,” we said together.
“Mrs. Agatha Graves, your wedding party has been assembled and awaits you. Do you accept your calling in accordance with the secrecy vows I just outlined?”
“I do.”
“Then allow me to welcome you to our hall.”
The Grand Master turned and knocked three times on the large set of double doors that stood beside us. The doors opened of their own volition to reveal the ceremonial hall. Men in various colored robes stood before pews that faced a podium at the far end of the room. There was an aisle leading between the pews. In fact, the lack of windows and an altar were the only things setting the hall apart from a church. All of the men standing faced us and smiled. In the odd outfits and amongst all the excitement, I couldn’t say that I recognized any of them.
The Grand Master led the way down the aisle to the podium. Lawrence took Agatha’s arm and led her forward. Alex took my arm and did the same. As we started to walk I heard a strange hooting call that alarmed me before I noticed that the men in waiting were making the low sound of owls.
There were empty seats in the front pew. Lawrence guided Alex and me into these seats before following the Grand Master to stand with him on the podium. A grand chair had been set up on the raised dais for Agatha to sit in during the ceremony. The Grand Master started to speak the moment we were all seated.
“Brothers, we are gathered here this day to celebrate the union of our Brother Jackman with his beloved Mrs. Agatha Graves. But before the celebration begins, we must perform the Man’s Ceremony to determine if his bride is willing to have him. I now call upon Brother Jackman to initiate this important rite of passage. Brother Jackman.”
The Grand Master took a seat in one of the front pews as Lawrence approached the podium.
“Brothers, I stand before you to bare my soul and by doing so to show that I deserve the wonderful woman I am about to wed. Agatha, I perform this rite of passage in your name. Chloe and Alex, I thank you for bearing witness to my testimony.
“Agatha, I have loved others before you, but none so strongly. I am ready to dedicate my life to you, but first you must be given a full accounting of myself in order to prove my worth to you.
“Now, this next part may sound silly, but bear with me if you will,” Lawrence concluded.
There was snickering from the other brothers in the audience. Alex and I shared puzzled glances.
“First, I have recently purchased at a farm just outside of the town of Hope Falls the horse, two milking cows, and ten chickens I need to meet the minimum requirements of a husband as set down by this brotherhood. For we are an old order but hold strong to our founding tenets.
“Second, I am a good man who lives his life by the most fundamental principles of this fraternity. The principles of justice, honor, decency, loyalty, honesty, charity, and compassion run strong in my veins.
“Third, I swear before God that I am free to enter into the bonds of holy matrimony and that no prior commitments or obligations will interfere with those bonds.
“Finally, I hereby declare that I will never harm you in any way, that I will protect you, and that I will love, honor, and cherish you for the rest of my days.
“Grand Master, may I now make my personal statement?”
“You may.” The Grand Master stood to reply and then sat down again.
“Agatha, I’m not a perfect man. I stole candy from a five-and-dime when I was ten. That’s the last time that I ever stole, I swear. I served my country proudly in Vietnam where I had to kill men. Now I find it hard to be proud of anything done during war. I’ve done other things I’m not proud of, too many to name, and in all cases possible have atoned for them.”
The building began to hum at the sound of the brothers hooting and making other very authentic sounding owl calls.
“On the positive side I am a loving and kind man. I tend to stay away from conflict, preferring a civil dialog to argument. I have never struck a woman and would never strike a woman. I’m confident, strong, and in good health. I still have all my own teeth and walk three miles a day. I’m financially sound and fully prepared to support you. I even pick up my own socks and underwear.”
He paused during an extended round of hooting.
“I’ve loved other women and even had relations with them, but I’ve never loved as I love you.
“Mrs. Agatha Graves, this being as full and honest an accounting as I can make of what I have to offer you I now ask, will you accept me as your husband?”
There were tears streaming down Agatha’s face. I hadn’t noticed them until I wiped away the tears filling my own eyes. I grabbed and squeezed Alex’s hand and we shared a smile. Lawrence stepped from the podium and offered his handkerchief to Agatha so she could dry her face.
“Of course I accept you, Lawrence,” Agatha managed to say, rising from her seat and throwing her arms around Lawrence’s neck.
The couple hugged, kissed, and smiled. The fevered sound of hooting filled the hall. Alex and I eventually joined the others,
the sound was so compelling. The Grand Master stood and raised his arms for silence.
“And now, brothers, I officially declare Brother Lawrence Jackman fit in the eyes of the brotherhood to fulfill his responsibilities as husband of our new sister, Mrs. Agatha Graves.”
That received plenty of hoots.
The Grand Master led the couple back up the aisle. Progress was slow as all the brothers crowded the aisle to congratulate the couple. Alex and I followed. What surprised me was that the brothers also wanted to shake hands with us and thank us for being there. We were led back to the foyer where the couple was asked to sign several journals and record books. The doors to the ceremonial hall were closed.
“Why didn’t you have to perform the Man’s Ceremony before we got married?” I asked Alex while we waited.
“Next time,” Alex joked.
At least I hoped he was joking.
Chapter 12
We eventually got around to having breakfast together at Lilly’s Place, an old, established breakfast house that had been serving since my youth. We crowded into a corner booth like a bunch of school kids playing hooky from school. I proceeded to drool over my menu as I tried to decide what to have. Lawrence and Agatha ordered toast and coffee. That didn’t slow me down one bit.
“Lawrence, that really was a beautiful ceremony,” I commented.
“I thank you and at the same time remind you that what you speak of should never again be discussed in public.”
“Mums the word,” I replied, locking my lips and throwing away the key.
Agatha simply took hold of Lawrence’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. They really were perfect together.
I had a build-a-breakfast special with two eggs over easy, hash browns, bacon, and wheat toast. Basically too much food. After hearing my order, Alex ordered the same. We feasted as the newlyweds-to-be pined for one another.
After breakfast, the boys dropped us girls off at the beauty parlor while they went to get ready for the wedding. From the moment we stepped through the front door of the Sassy Lady we were treated like royalty. Agatha accepted a hot cup of tea as we were whisked away into a back room for our facials. I asked for and received an Alka-Seltzer to relieve my swollen stomach.
We lay on our backs side by side in what were effectively recliners while women worked on our specific facial needs. After some gentle cleansing and preparation, I was given a seaweed mask. Fresh slices of cucumber were laid over my eyes. I heard that Agatha was to be given a mud treatment. Personally, I didn’t care what they did to me, I was having a blast. While we were waiting for the masks to do their thing the manicures were begun.
“To think, this is the life I could be leading if only I’d married a rich man,” I commented.
“I think you did quite well snagging Alex,” Agatha replied.
“I suppose. Still, this is very nice.”
I didn’t see my hands until the mask and cucumber slices had been removed. I had a hard time opening my eyes. They wanted to remain closed while I experienced more. They got their chance after a quick look at my nails, which looked marvelous. I chose pink pearl for my nail color while a moisturizer was applied to my face. Massage of the neck and shoulders followed. I fell asleep in the chair. I was told that this happens quite often.
When I woke, Agatha was already gone to have her makeup applied. A nice young woman, named Betty, led me into the makeup room. Again, I got to sit next to Agatha while we were pampered, this time with powders and paints. When Betty was done, I hardly recognized myself in the mirror. I looked stunning. Agatha looked even better.
Next came the hair which meant side-by-side sittings with Renee, the head stylist. He had assistants helping him wash and dye the hair, giving me highlights. Renee personally performed both the cuts. This gave him plenty of time to make outlandish statements in between ordering his assistants around.
“So, which one of you ordered the Mohawk?” he asked playfully.
“Have you seen the First Lady’s hair? She needs an emergency appointment to come and see me right away.”
“Highlights on my shoulder make me happy,” he sang to a John Denver tune.
When Renee was done with my hair, which was styled to be worn up, I had him attach the vintage hat that I’d bought to match my bridesmaid’s suit. He had me change into my wedding clothes so that I could see the entire effect. In my suit, all made-up, I thought I looked a little like Grace Kelly. Every woman’s dream. Alex is going to flip, I thought.
When Agatha stepped out of the dressing room, I thought she was the most beautiful bride I’d ever seen. Her hair was done up away from her face which was lightly veiled. Her cream-colored forties-style suit was once again the height of fashion. I thought she looked like an aging Myrna Loy. I was sure that Lawrence was going to flip.
We caught a taxi to Agatha’s home to wait for the limousine to come pick us up. Agatha sat in her favorite rocker and stared out the window. She was firmly ensconced in her own personal zone of serenity. That left me plenty of time on my hands, so I started reviewing the case. Soon my ANALYTICO engine took over and time no longer had meaning.
Supervisor Janet Daniels opposes the new Rankles and Edwards construction project. She is murdered during a murder mystery dinner. Both the dinner and the murder are based on a book, Murder in One Act by C. J. Masterson, aka Mrs. Agatha Graves. The murderer makes an appearance by the side of the dead victim, hidden behind a New Orleans-style party mask. The case is currently unsolved.
Eddie Springer is Randolph Rankles’ son. He is the second individual I’ve found to be firmly opposed to the construction project after Ms. Daniels. Eddie has been peddling something elicit to the Chief right under my nose at the police station. I don’t like the secrecy.
At the construction site, I was given the name of a foreman who had been fired by Rankles and Edwards only to begin protesting against the company soon afterward. The name of the ex-foreman was Cyrus Knox.
Was there something in that thick stack of cold murder case files that should have set off an alarm in my mind? There was. My instincts told me so. This is where my memory can become bothersome. Though it’s limitless, I seem to remember everything I see or hear, retrieval times to my memory can be slow. I may have looked like I was staring at my shoes, which I was in a way, but my mind was busy parsing through each of the files I’d reviewed the previous day, from Atkins through Weatherly. I almost bit my tongue when I came across the case labeled Knox, Cyrus J.
I opened the file and reviewed the information I’d skimmed the first time. Cyrus J. Knox was indeed a foreman for Rankles and Edwards Construction. He’d been fired for complaining in public about construction quality and safety issues at a project up in Seattle. He later began protesting at the construction site and was threatened with arrest if he didn’t desist. The fact that he was murdered the next week undoubtedly accounted for his absence from the current fray.
Cause of death: electrocution. A toaster had been tossed into the tub with him while he was taking a bath. Just like in Murder Most Shocking by C. J. Masterson. The correlation nearly shocked me back to reality. After the initial jolt of recognition, my thought processes began to purr again, incorporating the new data.
That made two murders based on books by Agatha, and both murders involved victims that were being a nuisance to Rankles and Edwards. I needed to get in touch with the Chief pronto to let him know what I’d found. We may be after some deranged serial killer.
While I was storing these new correlations, our transportation to the wedding venue arrived. It was a white Rolls Royce. And when I say it was white, I mean that even the tires had whitewalls. The sight of this beautiful car driving the streets of Hope Falls finally shocked my ANALYTICO engine back to reality. My mind did a hard reset.
“Oh my,” Agatha exclaimed when she spotted the car.
I was already up out of my seat and headed for the door. I stepped outside as the car pulled smoothly to the curb at the end of the dri
veway. I couldn’t help but run down the walkway to the drive to watch. I felt Agatha grab hold of my arm beside me. A man dressed in a black chauffeur’s outfit stepped out the driver’s side door and slipped on his hat.
“Ladies, your wedding party awaits you,” the chauffeur announced.
I looked to Agatha and we shared a giddy smile. Where had Lawrence found such a beautiful car? The common look we exchanged asked the question without using words. We gathered our composure and stepped down the drive arm in arm. The chauffeur bowed as we entered the back seat. The room in the back was ample, the bench seat upholstered in rich tan leather. The chauffeur leaned his head through the open door before closing it.
“You’ll find an open bottle of champagne in the ice bucket should you require a drink during your ride.”
Sure enough, there was an ice bucket sitting on the floor before our seat. I poured Agatha a glass and then poured myself a half glass. I didn’t want to drink too much since alcohol tends to make me loopy. The chauffeur climbed in and started the car. The engine purred and I barely felt the car move as we pulled away from the curb. We drove slowly down Main Street on the way to the park. Everyone we passed stopped to look at the car. I hoped they were trying to figure out what rich dignitary, businessman, or movie star was riding in the back seat. As for me, the drive was too short. In fewer than ten minutes we’d arrived at the wedding venue. The Rolls pulled up to the back door of the recreation center and Agatha and I slipped inside, sight unseen.
Inside the room, my father waited. He was in a sleek black tuxedo with tails. You see, he was the one to give the bride away. I wasn’t surprised to see the Chief in the room keeping my dad company, nor was I surprised to find them both drinking. As we entered, the Chief excused himself, emptied his can of beer, and left through a side door before I could get his attention to let him know that I needed to talk with him.
“Wow, Dad, you look great,” I said as my father approached.
Murder by the Book (A Chloe Boston Mystery Book 15) Page 7
