by M. A. Church
"Yeah, I'm fucking dancing," I answered dully, amazed that he'd even asked me that. And why did he have free access to move around this ship? "Look, I just need to be alone for a while."
"Listen to me. Rest, and then study some more. Believe me, Dale, the more you know, the more you'll understand them."
The door opened and I left Chad standing there, just staring at me. I couldn't deal with him right now. I didn't want to understand them; why couldn't he get that?
I went to the bedroom, crawled into the middle of the bed, and curled up. I wanted to forget for a while. But one thought kept nagging me: was I being told the truth? How would I ever know if I'd had leukemia? But why lie about it? He wanted me, and he took me. No one was going to stop him, so why make up something like this? There was no reason to.
And frankly, it didn't matter. I was here—end of story. Was there a point in resisting him? Could I escape?
I slammed my head on the pillow. Who was I kidding? I couldn't even get in the damn room on my own. How in the world could I escape? Chad certainly was no help. He had made it very clear he loved that alien. Had he been brainwashed somehow? Was he suffering from that syndrome... oh, what was it called? I shuddered. Wasn't that a pleasant thought?
I was nearly asleep when Keyno entered the room. I opened my eyes to stare at him as he sat next to me on the bed. If Chad was correct, then I owed him my life. And I didn't like how that made me feel.
"Is it true?" I got straight to the point. "You saved my life?"
"Yes, it's true. But in order for me to save you, I had to destroy the life you knew." Keyno looked at me, sadness and another emotion I didn't want to examine shining in his eyes.
"Why? Why not just tell me or something? I could've gone to a doctor and been tested. You didn't have to do it like this."
"That's true, I could have. But I wanted you as my mate. I couldn't let you die, and I refused to leave here without you."
I understood what he wasn't saying. Even if I hadn't had the disease, he would've taken me. "I didn't even know. God, I didn't even know I had it."
"I can show you the scans, if you need proof. In the past year, hadn't you noticed you were tired more than usual and bruised easily?"
"You don't get it, do you? When Chad was taken, it was like he had died. I didn't notice much of anything. I didn't care."
"I am so sorry, Dale. I truly wish... well, it doesn't matter what I wish. Things are the way they are because they have to be. But I am sorry you suffered."
Fuck that. I didn't want to deal with his so-called sadness; anger was much easier to handle. And I was still so damn angry. I was grieving for my family, and the wrongness of the situation infuriated me, making me want to pound something either until it bled or I stopped hurting. The rules for the Harvest were there for a damn reason, not that it seemed to matter. Christ, my own government had put the screws to me.
And yes, I was angry at Keyno. He'd taken away everything I loved, put me through the most frightening experience of my life, and then plopped me down on a fucking starship. He'd just taken; he'd never asked. And yeah, let's not forget the deadly disease part. Oh, there was the whole mating thing, too. But he had also saved my life and had treated me gently, so far. I sighed deeply, remembering the haunted look on Keyno's face as he told me he couldn't let me die. And so what? That didn't mean he actually had feelings for me. Or could he? How could he? He didn't know me.
"I want to go home." Tears rose in my eyes. "Can't you just let me go?"
"No." Keyno shook his head. "This isn't easy on any of us, Dale, and I hope one day you'll see that. But no, I won't return you. I will try to do everything in my power to make this as easy as I can for you. The longer you fight what can't be changed, the longer it'll take for you to adjust. Let me help."
It galled me to admit it, but he was right. I might not have a choice about being here, but I damn well did have a choice about how I handled things. I could fight him, but what good would that do? Yeah, I could storm, shout, and throw the biggest hissy fit this side of the sun... and what good would that do? What would it change? Absolutely nothing. But my inability to change my situation didn't mean I had to just lie down and let him walk all over me, either.
"Thank you for, you know, saving my life," I whispered. I felt I owed him that. I wiped away the tears. "But that's all I owe you, dammit. You say you want me as your mate. That means to me I'm supposed to be your significant other. Someone special to you. Is this your idea of special? You son of a bitch, my body has been flooded with alien DNA—and without my consent! My whole identity has been built around being a person born physically male who identifies as a man. Thanks to your species, I've lost my family, my homeworld, had my brain hacked into, my choice of spouse taken from me, and my best friend harvested. Why the hell should I do anything you want?"
Keyno rubbed his hands over his face. "You shouldn't. Gods knows this isn't right. Please, just listen to me... King Vesh was our king back then and ordered our ships to assault the Onfre. I was new and untested in battle, so I didn't have a part in the attack we launched. I was studying an exploding star in another galaxy when the news of the Onfre's response to our attack was channeled to us. Our king didn't believe they'd do anything, which was stupid. Little did we know just what we had unleashed. It took three days at hyper-stardrive to get home. And... the damage was already done."
"What do you mean?"
"They seeded our atmosphere, which you know. Our scientists didn't initially appreciate the virulence of the virus. We had no idea how bad it would get or that we wouldn't be able to stop it. As soon as my crew and any others who had been off-world stepped onto our soil, we were infected. Dale, the virus they infected us with was... brutally painful. Days of horrible agony, and none of our anesthetics touched it. Our surculas, our egg tissues, what you would identify as the 'female' part of our reproductive systems was... eaten away. Dissolved."
"Jesus. You went through that and lived?"
"Barely. Many didn't. That wasn't the worst of it. For males who were in the early terms of pregnancy, the virus destroyed their young along with their egg tissues. But that wasn't all. In those who were further into their pregnancies the reaction was much, much more violent."
"You don't have to finish this. I think I know how it's going to end."
"You need to know how far this extends. Maybe it will help you understand. The virus's protein attacked the young. When it was done destroying the young, it kept going, attacking the rest of the body. Those in mid-to late-stage pregnancies were literally dissolved from the inside out." Keyno's voice was little more than a hoarse croak. "By the gods, Dale, you can't even imagine what I came home to, the mess our world was in. We tried to find other ways to reproduce, but nothing worked. A civil war resulted, but not before the practice of harvesting was introduced. Privately, many of us don't agree with this, but what are we to do?"
"Not this. Not this way. It's wrong."
"I can't change how things are done. We have the right to survive and do what must be done. Regardless of how I feel, until our current king changes the policy, this is the way things are. Dale, we aren't human and you can't apply your human morals to us."
"That's a bunch of crap and you know it. Wrong is wrong. So what if you guys are bigger and badder than us? It still isn't right."
"What if the roles were reversed? What would humanity do if they were facing extinction? I'll tell you what they would do... whatever it took to survive. Your species isn't the most peaceful in the universe, either. Look at your own history. Really, Dale, your kind might not have the technology we have, but humans can be just as bloodthirsty. And if they did have such technology, are you going to tell me that Terrans wouldn't do whatever they had to in order to survive?"
Shit. I don't want to talk about hypothetical situations. I don't want to debate what humans would do if the shoe was on the other foot. I don't care! This is my life we're talking about.
"Dale, please...
try. I can't change what's been done. I can't change how things are done. I wish it didn't have to be this way, but it is. Won't you try? I'll do all that I can to make you happy."
"I don't want this, can't you understand that? I want to go home. How many times do I have to say that?"
"And you can't. You've been registered as harvested. Even if you managed to get my weapon and take me hostage, even if I was willing to fly you back to earth... what do you think would happen? As soon as we entered your air space, we'd be contacted. Do you really believe any government would allow you to land? And even if they did, do you think they would hide you? Welcome you back with open arms? No, they would return you. Dale, your world wasn't willing to fight for the few thousand males we took in each Harvest. Compare that to the billions of your world. They didn't want to start a war with us, a war they couldn't win. And we didn't want to kill humans. That defeated the purpose. I took you under circumstances you find horrifying, but Dale, your world isn't free of blame. They made no effort to stop us, do you understand that?"
"And if I refuse to cooperate?"
"You're not going to like this, but I won't be able to allow you out of my quarters. I won't take the chance another male could claim you."
"So then I'll be a prisoner unless I submit."
"No. Well... yes. Gods, no matter what I say, I can't come across as anything but a monster."
How can I think any differently? No choice. I have no choice. "Okay, I'm going to try to accept this—this situation as best I can. Will you give me a chance to get to know you, please?"
"Yes, I will. I'm not a monster, no matter what you may think. Your happiness means a lot to me. I want you to continue with your studies." Gently Keyno brushed his hand across my hair. "I won't rush you."
I hoped he was telling me the truth. "So, now what?"
"Now we eat dinner in the ship lounge so you can meet some of my crew." Keyno held his hand out, waiting for me to take it.
"Oh. Okay. Will Chad be there?" I grasped his hand, letting him pull me off the bed. Tingles raced up my arm from his touch, surprising me.
"I'll ask that he and his mate meet us. Before we go, I need to give you something." Keyno turned and opened a small panel in a wall. "This is something all mates wear. It shows what family you belong to, and it identifies you as mine."
It was a necklace made of small coal black stones that had a clear oval stone in the middle. Three wavy red lines, one on top of the other, decorated the stone in the middle. I vaguely recalled that Chad wore something like this earlier. His was in a different color, and had a different design on the center stone.
"Will you accept my offering, Dale?" Keyno asked. "Will you accept me as your mate?"
I stared at the necklace, knowing if he put that necklace on me, it wouldn't be coming off. I'd be giving up all that I knew to be his, living on another world with creatures I didn't really know much about yet.
"Do I really have a choice?" I asked quietly.
"As an unclaimed mate on my world, you'd be vulnerable to any male who was able to put his symbol around your neck. I would be powerless to help you, if that occurred."
Well, that answered that, didn't it? I had no choice. "If I let you put that thing on me—"
"Dale, just because you wear my symbol doesn't mean I'll push you into anything you're not ready for, I promise."
Didn't he get that he was pushing me now? But if I'm locked up, what good is that going to do me? "Okay..." I took a deep breath, knowing everything was about to change for me. "Okay."
Moving behind me, he gently fastened the necklace around my neck, pushing my hair out of the way. I felt his breath on the back of my neck, making me shiver. I jumped when his lips feathered across my nape, making the hairs on my neck stand up. Every damn time he touched me, my body tingled. His hands lightly massaged my shoulders as he sniffed at my neck, the small puff of air making me quiver.
When he released me, he picked up another necklace from the wall unit similar to the one that matched mine. "I'd be honored if you'd place this on me. All Tah'Narians wear necklaces that match their mates."
I gently fastened the necklace around his throat, and was suddenly shy about meeting his eyes.
"Would you like to see the ship?"
"Yeah, I'm—" That was as far as I got when my stomach let out a loud growl. I could feel myself turning red as he smiled at me.
"Maybe we should tend to that first. Come," he said and I felt myself turn even redder at his choice of words. "Let's feed you."
Chapter Four
Our first meal together was an experience I won't ever forget. Before we entered the eating area, Keyno warned me I would see many different life forms. Apparently, Earth wasn't the only planet they had harvested. I kept my opinion on that to myself.
My eyes roamed the room, unable to settle. Some mates had light gray skin, with thick braids in their dark blue hair. In those braids there were bells that chimed when they moved. Keyno said they were from a planet completely covered in water. Some mates had a reptilian look. They had two small horns on the top of their heads. Their skin looked like scales and their hair was a murky brown. They were from a desert planet near the Tah'Narian home world, Kenyo said. Others had red wings with black stripes. Their black skin glistened in the light. Their hair was red and so were their eyes.
They all had two things in common: each wore a symbol around his neck, and each had a strip of color in his hair, near his face. The streak matched the hair color of their mate. I remembered Chad had this, and his was black just like Gibor's hair color.
"Oh, my God," I breathed quietly.
Keyno kept his hand on my lower back as he escorted me through the room to a table. "I know it's a little overwhelming, but many of the mates onboard are anxious to meet you."
"Why would they be interested in meeting me?" I whispered, shocked. I wasn't anyone important.
"They are mated to my crew. Many of them knew I planned to mate with a human on this trip. When the crew has to go on a mission, they always bring their mates."
Oh, yeah, right. He was the captain of this starship. During our meal, many introductions were made. I met most of the Senior Officers and their mates, if they were mated. I noticed the crew referred to Keyno as Captain Shou, and he referred to me as his chosen. When I asked him about it he said I was picked by him, not bid upon at auction.
Auction. I shivered. What would it be like being up on an auction block and sold? How barbaric was that? Thank God I didn't have to go through that.
Once our meal was over, we returned to our cabin so I could study more. Keyno had reports he needed to read. I didn't want to think how... homey this was. I settled on the couch and pulled the gadget on. Half way through the hour session, I pulled it off and rubbed my eyes.
Keyno looked up from the small desk. A hologram image was in front of him. He waved his hand and the image disappeared. "What's wrong? You're pale."
"My head's hurting, and I'm slightly nauseated." I patted my belly, trying to settle the grumbling down. "Is that a common side effect of this thing?"
"No. No one has ever complained about that before." Keyno frowned at me. "Maybe I should call our Chief Medical Officer, Tanlor Kere."
I opened my mouth to tell him not to worry about it when I was seized by a horrible stomach cramp. The pain in my head worsened, blindsiding me. "Keyno? Ah, shit, I feel like I'm going to—"
"Gods, you're green, Dale. Hold on." Keyno hurried around the desk and helped me to the bed. He wet a washcloth, and the coolness did help settle my stomach some. Keyno buzzed their doctor, and seconds later he arrived with a portakit.
"Hello, Dale. I'm Doc. Remember meeting me earlier while you ate? I'm going to look you over and see what the problem is. All right? I won't hurt you."
I did remember him. "Hey, Doc." I lay on the bed, being very still. The less I moved, the better.
He ran tests on me, his face carefully blank. Finally, he injected me with somethin
g to help with the pain. With a warm smile, he stepped away and motioned Keyno to follow him. Keyno and Doc stood outside the door, talking for several minutes before Keyno returned. Swear to God, were all doctors the same?
Moments later, Keyno returned to the bedside. "Tanlor—whom we call Doc— requested that you stay in bed for the next twenty-four hours. What he injected you with will stop the pain and nausea soon."
"What's going on?" I whimpered as the pain stabbed at me again and then slowly faded.
"Do you remember the conversation that you had with Chad earlier?" Keyno sighed. "Remember when he told you that you were injected with our DNA?"
"Yeah," I moaned as a bolt of nausea swept through me. "How did you know what we talked about?"
"I asked him to speak to you about certain things that you needed to know." Keyno gently settled on the bed.
"Am I having a reaction?" I gritted my teeth as my stomach cramped up again. When the hell was that stuff going to take effect?
"No!" Keyno gasped loudly. "No, you're fine. This just wasn't expected to happen quite so fast."
"What wasn't expected to happen so fast?" I was now more worried about why he was avoiding giving me a straight answer.
"Because of the leukemia and the damage done to your body already, we had to double-dose you. All mates just get the standard dose. This causes a few outward changes in appearance. I'm sure you noticed Chad looks a little different."
"Yeah, I did. So, what's the problem?"
"There is no problem except that you may have a few more outward changes than most. When we first came to your world, we told your people we were essentially sterile—our race has male and female organs." Keyno watched me carefully. "We used to produce both eggs and sperm."
"Okay, so...?"
"We can no longer produce viable eggs, but our sperm is still good. The DNA all mates are injected with... well, it mutates their organs so they can..." Keyno took a deep breath.
"What?" I beseeched as panic built. "So they can what?"
"Your body is changing, mutating so I can impregnate you," Keyno answered. "You, my chosen, will carry our young when the time comes."
