by M. A. Church
A low growl worked its way from Keyno's throat, ending in a primal scream. "You," Keyno hissed, moving toward Yar. "I claim the right to challenge—and to the death."
"Gladly," Yar snarled. "And if I win the challenge?"
King Duran interrupted. "If this is the way Keyno wants it, then you will not be put to death if you survive. But you will not have the mate Dale."
"Wh-what?" I stuttered. "Hold up a second. This is happening now?"
"Yes."
"But—"
Jolak hurried over to me and started to drag me from the room. I immediately dug my heels in, refusing to leave the Throne Room. This was nuts. A challenge to the death? What the hell was Keyno thinking? Just shoot the bastard in the head and call it a day. Besides, it was too soon—Keyno hadn't had a chance to rest, or even eat. Who knew what injuries he had? I wanted to scream for them to stop this. I just got him back. I can't lose him now. There was something wrong with him, too. Outside of that brief hug, he hadn't touched me. I stepped toward Keyno, unsure what I was going to say.
Jolak pulled me close. "Shhh. Keyno needs to do this, Dale. This is our law. Keyno will be fine—he is a Master with the hast. You, however, do not need to see this."
"But—"
Keyno turned to me, his eyes empty. "Go with him, Dale. I will come for you soon."
What the fuck is going on here? Stunned, I let Jolak pull me out of the Throne Room. I followed him blindly as he led me to a small sitting room not far away. I couldn't believe how coldly Keyno had treated me.
"Dale?"
"What?" I snapped as I collapsed on a small couch, staring at the floor. Then, horrified at my response, I looked up. Jesus, I just snapped at the king's mate. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to—"
Jolak sat down next to me and took my hand. "Are we friends?"
"I... yes. I mean, I thought we were. I would like to be." I ran my hands through my hair. "But what does that have to do with anything? Seriously floundering here, Jolak."
Jolak laughed again, shaking his head. "Good. I consider us friends, too. And as your friend, I need you to listen to me. I've been here with the Tah'Narians much longer than you have. When Duran first mated me and brought me here, things were... bad."
"But—"
"Listen. There was unrest and chaos. Duran had his hands full with the aftermath of the war with the Onfre and the previous king's policies. Some mates were stolen, and challenges to the death were common. Have you seen Keyno kill?"
How the hell was I supposed to keep up with these sudden changes in the conversation? Then memories of that day when Colt tried to escape flooded me, and I shivered. "Yes, I have seen him kill. Keyno killed someone that tried to escape for attacking me. Why? What does this have to do with anything?"
"Was the killing quick and clean?"
I flashed back to Keyno snapping that guy's neck. Yeah, it had been fast, so much so I hadn't been able to stop him. I'd barely stopped him from killing Colt that day. "Yes, it was fast... and damned efficient."
Jolak leaned closer to me. "This will be neither quick nor efficient. This will be bloody, cruel, and violent. Trust me when I say that you do not need to have this burned into your mind. He needs to do this."
"But he was just rescued. Why is no one else worried about that? Couldn't this have waited for a day or two... or maybe never? What if he gets his damn fool self killed? What will I do then?"
"No, it can't wait. It needs to be done now, while Keyno is ready to kill. Nothing will stop him, and he will not wait. Yar did something that deserves to be punished by death, Dale, and by Keyno's hand. Not only did he involve the space pirates, he planned to kill a fellow Tah'Narian for his mate. Factor in that this Tah'Narian is a member of the royal family... there was no other way for this to end but in death challenge. There is no doubt that Keyno will win this."
"But—"
"No 'buts', Dale. He did this for you. He didn't want you to see how violent he can be in certain circumstances, which is why he made you leave. Keyno will win because he has rage fueling him—a rage unlike any you've never seen, and that you don't need to see. He will win because he won't allow anyone to claim what is his—you. It's that simple, and that complicated." Jolak sighed. "That pretty much explains these Tah'Narians."
"There's more, isn't there? Something else that you haven't touched on."
He frowned as footsteps sounded outside the room. "He comes for you. That was fast. Remember, egos can be fragile things, Dale."
"Huh?" I barely asked the question when suddenly there was Keyno. And there was surprising lack of blood on him.
"Jolak? Thank you for staying with Dale. Could I have a minute, please? Duran has requested we all return to the Throne Room in ten minutes."
Keyno quickly explained Yar had not fought fair, attacking him with a poisoned knife soon after their battle started. As soon as he pulled the knife, one of the King's Guards killed Yar. Keyno was enraged that he hadn't been able to strike the killing blow, but I was privately glad Keyno hadn't been the one to take his life. Keyno had enough blood on his hands; I didn't want more.
But Keyno's behavior toward me was still remote, even cold. "Keyno? Is there... is everything okay?"
Keyno turned away as I reached out to touch him. "Yes. Come, we must return."
I came within a half an inch of saying 'Fuck that,' but I didn't. We returned to hear King Duran announce that, because Ti had rescued Keyno, a new relationship had formed between the Tah'Narians and the Onfre. Ti was now welcome to Tah'Nar anytime he wished, and Ti planned to speak to their leaders about us coming to Onfre. Keyno promised we would visit Ti as soon as things calmed down and permission had been granted. I was looking forward to this; I wanted to make sure Colt was happy with his choice. Ti had mentioned during his story that he'd claimed Colt while they were gone, meeting the asking price for him.
But first, dammit, I wanted my mate to myself. There was something seriously wrong with Keyno.
After the announcement, Keyno and I went home. I couldn't wait to get there; I desperately wanted to be alone with my mate. The past three days had been the worst of my life. The uncertainty had kept me up at night, wondering where he was and what was being done to him. In the early hours of the morning, when I was alone with my thoughts, I ached for him, the fear and pain nearly bringing me to my knees. I needed to hold him and touch him, so I could finally convince myself that he was truly okay.
Since our ship had been destroyed by the combination of the pirates' attack and our crash landing, King Duran had one of his guards shuttle us home. Keyno held my hand but he didn't talk to me, instead staring at the passing sights as we flew home. Well, that's something at least. Not much, but something. The tension radiating off Keyno was thick enough to cut with a knife. Since leaving the palace, Keyno had shut me out, barely speaking to me. I was confused, upset, and hurt by his actions.
"Keyno, are you okay?" I squeezed his hand, trying to get him to look at me. "They didn't hurt you, did they?"
"You worry over my health when you should be concerned for my honor. Yar's life belonged to me. I earned the right to kill him and I was... cheated."
"Keyno, I'm not worried about your honor. It didn't crash-land, get knocked out cold, and then kidnapped by space pirates." I rubbed my forehead. Was this the bug up his ass? "Christ, the very idea of you fighting somebody so soon after your rescue scared me to death. I was scared that you'd be at a disadvantage."
The driver stiffened at the wheel as Keyno finally turned his bruised and battered head to face me, his expression dead. Silence lay as heavy as a lead balloon in the small compartment of the flyer. A slightly acidic smell wafted through the cab of the flyer. I knew that smell; I'd smelled something similar before and knew immediately that I'd said something wrong. Well, shit.
Keyno stared at me. "Does my own mate doubt my fighting capabilities now?" His voice had a slight growl to it.
"Damn, I didn't mean it that way." Desperate to dig mys
elf out of whatever hole I'd just landed in, I tried to explain. "I was just worried, that's all. I didn't know if they starved you, or beat you, or... or whatever! I have been out of my mind with worry over you for several days! Please don't take what I said as an insult."
"I am a warrior, Dale. I am trained to handle myself in battle." Keyno slowly removed his hand from mine and returned to looking out the window. "Unlike you, I have been trained to handle starvation and torture by one's enemy."
I gasped at the insult and snapped my mouth closed. Oh, no, you did not. I didn't know exactly how we'd ended up in this argument—or what-the-hell-ever we were having—but damned if I was going to continue this stupid conversation in front of an audience. My worry was slowly turning to anger.
The rest of the ride home was spent with me looking out one window at the blur of scenery that flew past, and Keyno staring out the other window. Stupid, macho, testosterone-filled, hard-headed, what-the-hell-flew-up-your-ass-and-died jackass. I've been half out of my mind with worry over you, and the first thing you do is pick a fucking fight with me. Well, fuck it sideways. Fine by me.
We arrived home, and the driver dropped us off. I watched Keyno slowly walk ahead of me into the open area of the house, noting how stiffly he moved. Well, my mate, you may be trained for battle—unlike me—but it still hurts like hell, doesn't it?
Keyno stood at the floor-to-ceiling window, looking out across the treetops. I could see the reflection of his face in the window now that the sun had set, and there was nothing there. No emotions whatsoever—just a hard look and a coldness in his eyes. Every instinct that I had screamed for me to go to him and care for him. I took a breath and tried to ignore his hurtful words from our ride home. Someone had to be the adult around here.
"Would you like for me to start the shower for you?" I asked.
"What I would like is to be left alone for a while, Dale."
His harsh words were like knives, the pain hot and sharp as they stabbed deep into me. Stunned, all I could do was stare at him. Why was he acting like this? The pressure behind my eyes built, and I knew I was about to bust out crying. His rejection was a physical ache. And damned if I was going to lose it in front of him.
Turning, I did what he asked and left him alone. I stumbled out to the patio, grabbing a throw on my way out. Wrapping the blanket tightly around me, I sank down on one of the chairs and stared out across the twinkling lights of the other rooftop homes, wondering why the lights were so blurry. A tear slid down my cheek as I lit the fire pit we had outside. The tears slipped steadily down my face as I watched Keyno move quietly across the room, heading upstairs to the bedroom.
Almost an hour later, he emerged from our bedroom and walked to the kitchen. I watched as he fixed something to eat, and then sat at the table. He was dressed for bed, but had a shirt on, which was unusual. I waited to see if he would look for me. He had to know where I was since I had the fire pit going.
He never once looked in my direction as he ate, acting like I wasn't even there. Placing his dishes in the sink, he went back up the stairs toward the bedroom and shut the door. I sat there with my mouth hanging open, shocked that he'd just abandoned me out here. We had never slept alone since he'd harvested me. Before the thought was even finished, my feet hit the floor and I stormed through the house, up the stairs, and slammed the bedroom door open.
"Listen to me, you testosterone-strangled Tah'Narian! I was told you were dead—you understand? Dead! So pardon the hell out of me—I was so overwhelmed and relieved that you were alive that it didn't occur to me that my concern for you might sound like I doubted your ability to fight. And I have to tell you, Keyno, it really bothers me that all you seem to be thinking about is how you didn't get to smear Yar all over the place. Days apart and you want to be alone? Fine. When you pull out the stick that's stuck up your ass, let me know. I'm sleeping on the fucking couch."
No Hollywood actress ever made a better exit, but it gave me no pleasure at all. He stared at me with those dead eyes the entire time I yelled at him. He didn't so much as flinch, even when I said Yar's name.
Lying down on the couch, I tried to get comfortable while I listened for the bedroom door to open—or for some other sound that would tell me he was coming back downstairs. We needed to talk—and he needed to let me in and let me help. Wasn't that what couples did... share? Be there for each other? Try to make the situation better? Of course, that was hard to do when the pointy-eared alien refused to talk to me. How could I be there for him if he shut me out? And okay, yeah. Maybe losing my temper wasn't the best thing to do, but dammit, he hurt me. I started to get up and go back upstairs, but paused. I was mad, and he was determined to ignore me; maybe tomorrow would be a better time to try and talk.
Drifting off to sleep, the thought crossed my mind that this was not how I imagined our first night together would end. I had no idea what was wrong or how to fix it.
Chapter Seventeen
Hours later, in the deep dark of the night, someone screamed.
The first scream brought me off the couch, half-asleep and dazed. Terrified, I searched frantically, trying to locate what the hell had made such a hideous noise. The second scream had me running at breakneck speed up the stairs and toward our bedroom. Throwing the door open, I found Keyno sitting up in bed, staring wild-eyed, the sheets a sweaty mess tangled around him.
Not entirely sure if he was awake, I moved closer to him. "Keyno? Easy there, big guy. You awake?"
A loud snarl stopped me dead in my tracks. Okay, that was a bit unnerving. Keyno was still not aware of where he was, apparently. Now what?
I stayed where I was, and tried to talk him down. I was sure that if Keyno was in his right mind, he wouldn't hurt me. "My mate? Can you hear me? It's okay—whatever's going on with you, it's okay. You're home and in our bed. Let me help you."
"Dale!" The sound of his anguish ripped through me, bringing tears to my eyes, and drove me toward the bed. Fuck being safe. My mate needed me. "No! You tell Yar if he touches Dale, I'll kill him! I'll take him apart with my bare hands! Dale is mine. My mate. No! Yar will die slowly... I swear it. No, oh, gods, no, no... my mate... Dale... I love him..."
"Yes, that's right. I'm yours, Keyno. Your mate. I'm right here. See? Touch me, I'm here." I eased up to the bed and gently touched his arm, attempting to wake him; now I understood perhaps a bit better the kind of mental games those pirates had played with him. He had known all along of Yar's treachery and had sworn to make him pay for it. But while I knew that was part of it, I thought there was more going on, something that went far deeper than an oath unfulfilled. "Come on, my mate. I need you to wake up. Please, Keyno, you're scaring me."
Slowly the light of consciousness flowed back into his eyes and he stared at me. With a lightning-fast move, he grabbed me and pulled me onto the bed, crushing me in his arms. His body shook silently as he buried his face in my neck. I held him, not saying anything about the wetness I felt slowly soaking my shoulder. Keyno would be horrified by what he'd consider a show of weakness on his part. Gently, I petted his hair as I held him and waited for the storm to pass.
"The pirates—they told me you'd been given to Yar. That he'd removed my claim on you and mated you... hurt you. I died a little more each day, imagining what he was doing to you, Dale. I didn't think I could survive... knowing that you needed me and—"
"Shhh. No one touched me, I swear it." I held his shaking body close to mine. "I was with Jolak the whole time. Yar never came close to me."
"I know that now, my mate. Oh, gods, forgive me for how I acted earlier."
"You want to explain that to me?" I leaned back so that I could see him. I knew he was embarrassed about his tears, but he owned me this. "The way you closed me out and the things you said to me really hurt. Why did you do that? Was it because of what I said about being worried about you fighting that soon after Ti rescued you? I truly meant no insult by that."
"I failed you."
The shame in hi
s voice broke my heart all over again and brought back Jolak's warning about fragile egos.
"How did you fail me?" I needed to move very carefully here. Instinct told me that I was dealing with a very battered ego, and that a Tah'Narian's battered ego could be dangerous.
"I didn't protect you when we crash-landed, and you were hurt. I was knocked out and unable to defend myself when the pirates took me, leaving you alone and unprotected. I allowed myself to be kidnapped, leaving you to defend yourself against Yar's attempted claim. I failed in every way as your protector."
"Listen to me, and think about this like a starship captain, not my lover." I sat cross-legged on the bed, holding his hand. I'd sit here all night if that's what it took to get through to him. "You crash-landed on a planet in a ship with no engines and kept the ship from breaking up. Christ, I can only guess at the amount of skill that took. You protected me by landing safely. You think I didn't notice, for the few seconds that I was conscious, that your side of the ship took the worst of the damage in the landing?"
"Dale—"
"I'm not done. You didn't allow yourself to be taken hostage. You were set up by that bastard Yar. You were kidnapped, held hostage, and... and, hell I don't know what else they did to you, but you survived and came home to me." I wrapped my arms around his naked chest and felt the horrible raised welts on his back as soon as my arms encircled him.
"What the hell—? Jesus, you've been whipped." I was horrified he hadn't said anything about the mess on his back. Now I had an idea of what else they'd done.
"I kept trying to escape to get back to you."
"Why the hell didn't you say something about your back?" I wanted to strangle him all over again. "Dammit, you are hell on my nerves, you know that? Have the wounds been treated?"
"I took care of it in the bathroom. It's nothing, Dale."
