We sat in silence for some minutes, until I broke it.
“I’m sorry.”
“Hmm?” she looked up. Her cheeks were stuffed as she hurriedly chewed her food. I chuckled before I could hold it in, and she looked down at her puffed out cheeks pinked. “Sorry about that,” she said once she’d swallowed. “But can I ask what it is you’re apologizing for now? Because you seem to be giving out a lot of apologies lately…”
I pursed my lips. “Well, you can't exactly say they aren't deserved, right?”
She stopped eating to meet and hold my gaze, giving me her full attention. As soon as she did, though, I ducked my head down, because I was feeling too ashamed.
“About leaving,” I said quietly. “When I could have stuck around, and I chose not to. That was my mistake. I just…didn’t want to be so close to the ranch. Even after I’d left I kept thinking about it. And…it just brings up too many bad memories.”
“Memories of your parents,” she said. Because she understood.
I may not have opened up much to my brother or grandpa, but before I left her, Rachel and I had been close. I’d always thought she was the woman I’d end up marrying, but then I left.
“I just had to,” I said, looking up, wanting her to understand. “It was too painful to stick around…”
“And I didn’t help,” she continued. “When I kept telling you just to go, visit your grandpa…”
I huffed a small laugh. “He was more interested in seeing just you, anyway. And even then, it was the worst excuse to use when all I wanted to do was run away; I was just too ashamed to admit it.”
Rachel hummed her agreement, but she was smiling at me. “I understood, Jason. Even though I didn’t agree. But…we said we’d leave it in the past already, right? This is the present. Can we focus on that?”
I nodded slowly, feeling warmth spread in my chest for the first time in a while as I watched her stuff her face.
Chapter Twelve
Rachel
The next time Jason came to me with offerings of food, it was in the form of a picnic. He knocked on the door, and I looked up ready with a smile. Jason lifted the basket he was holding in his hand.
“Want to take a walk around with me?” he offered.
After I made sure there was someone to look in on my son, we left. I hadn't called back for the babysitter, I hadn't even gone back home for long, save for a couple of times to get more clothes and stuff. I’d practically moved in.
Jason didn’t seem to mind.
We walked around aimlessly for a bit, just enjoying the ranch. I knew the acreage was pretty large, though I didn’t know just how large. It was all beautiful, the empty fields full of grass and flowers with some trees spotted here and there, and even the crop fields with the years’ yields. I hadn't had the time to just wander around over the grounds because Jason had never brought me by.
We found a beautiful, isolated spot on the ranch, where we sat under a few fruit trees to enjoy the shade. Jason set up the blanket, then spread out the food. I helped, and our hands kept brushing each other as we picked stuff out.
The first time it happened, my breath hitched, and it was like electricity shot through my body, for the first time in a long time. The second time, my body shivered. By the third time it happened, I was pretty sure Jason was doing it deliberately. Once the basket was empty, and I was reaching for some of the food to try it out, Jason caught my wrist and held it. I looked up to meet his eyes, my heart already beating fast in my chest.
“Rachel,” he whispered my name.
That was all it took. We were all over each other, and I was pretty sure I’d been the one to lean in for a kiss first. Because Jason had always been like that for me, so fucking hard to resist, from the first time met him. Though there was quite a gap in between that and when we started dating. But, I hardly cared about that as I attacked Jason’s clothes, trying to yank them off him. He did the same for me, pulling my t-shirt up and over my head before I could realize what was happening, with an arm wrapped around my waist to hold my body closer to his.
“Jason,” I moaned when he pulled back from the kiss to kiss and lick along my neck. “Just what the fuck are we doing?”
He groaned against my neck, giving a little nip that made me gasp.
“We’re doing what we both want to do,” he said, his voice rough. “What I’ve thought of since the day I walked away from you. I regretted it almost immediately, and I wanted to come back so many times…”
But his pride was in the way. I didn’t need him to tell me; I was the one who knew him the most, after all. He bit down in the space where my shoulder and neck met, and I was arching into him with another gasp.
“I want you, Rachel,” he whispered like he was admitting a terrible secret, voice hoarse. “Badly. Do you want me?”
I slid my fingers into his hair, and after a little bit more of him teasing my neck, before he could move lower to my chest, I yanked on his hair. He pulled back, just far enough so he could look at me.
“Of course I want you,” I told him, frowning. “Why would you ever think differently?”
He smiled sadly up at me, resting his chin on my breasts and making my breath hitch.
“Why wouldn’t you hate me? I’ve given you reason, haven’t I? After I walked away from you…”
I ducked down to press a slow kiss on his lips. He had his eyes closed when I pulled back, expression one of pleasure, and it made me smile.
“You walked away,” I agreed. His eyes opened, but they weren’t sad when he looked at me this time. “But, I didn’t try to stop you, either. I could have done…a lot of things, and I thought of them while I was going through the pregnancy alone. I was so scared, Jason, and I was so mad at myself when I kept thinking of all the things that could have been done differently. But I never got over you, I never even tried. That’s why you found me at the ranch when you came. I thought I should keep away from you for my sake, but still, I came when Nathan told me you were coming. I couldn’t help myself.”
It wasn’t an easy thing to admit, because I had my pride, and for a while, I’d believed Jason had completely shattered it. But, I did hold my share of the blame. Neither of us changed our numbers, and yet, in all that time I’d been left to myself, the person I reached out to was Nathan, not Jason. That had been my mistake.
“I’m glad I saw you there,” he said. “I wasn’t at the time. I was annoyed at my grandpa, and…at you, too. At myself, because I missed you, and I didn’t try to contact you over a stupid misunderstanding.”
I didn’t get the chance to say anything on the matter because he was kissing me again. It was slightly different from before, just as passionate, but not as desperate. He licked at the seam of my lips, and I opened for him, then groaned as his tongue slid into my mouth. He licked at the roof of my mouth, my tongue, then under it, rolling it against his. I wrapped my arms tight around him as he coaxed my tongue into his mouth and sucked gently on it. I could feel a throbbing start in between my thighs, and I squirmed against him.
“Jason,” I moaned out in a whisper when he let me breathe again.
The squirming wasn’t helping m current state much. Even though my bra, my nipples brushed against his hard chest, and the friction had them hardening, which just made me brush my chest against his even more. He hadn't touched me much, and already, I was gasping for breath.
Jason moved us around, and my body went willingly. He lay me down on the blanket, then straddled my legs.
“Now that I have you back, I promise I won’t let go this time,” he said as he kissed my neck, down to my chest. “Never again.”
My heart swelled at his words, and I realized there was something he didn’t know yet. Something important that I had to tell him, about our little boy Jack. Before I could think about it, though, he breathed over my breasts, and the thought was lost. I had my bra on, but I felt extra sensitive.
I pushed at his chest, so he moved back. I pulled down the s
traps of my bra to release my breasts, but didn’t take it off completely. I knew I was blushing, and it was more because I was half naked outside, where just anyone could see if they passed by, even though I’d already been feeling warm from our…activities.
“You’re worried someone will catch us,” Jason guessed, obviously reading the embarrassment in my expression, smirking down at me. “You don’t have to, you know.”
I scowled up at him, pouting. “Of course, I do. The ranch hands walk all over this place, you know…”
“Not this spot,” he promised, pecking a kiss on my forehead. “Not today.” Another peck on my cheek. “I’ve worked with them for a while, so I know they shouldn’t come by this way today.” A peck on my lips.
I was smiling up at him by the end of it. “We’re still going to be quick about this.”
“Not too quick,” he said.
Before I could voice my opinion, he’d ducked his head to my chest, and he ran his tongue over my nipple. The action was so sudden, so unexpected, that I squeaked out even as my body shivered at the lovely sensations. He did it again, and again, just licking that one spot, already driving me crazy. Then he wrapped his mouth around me and sucked. I let out a loud gasp, my back arching.
“Jason,” I whimpered. “Please!”
He growled, his mouth moving onto my other breast and giving it the same treatment before he decided to move on. He helped me tug off my jeans, then my panties, placing his hands on my thighs and spreading my legs wide for him.
I reached for him, then. He’d lost his t-shirt already, but I didn’t need him to strip completely. I pulled his hips into the space between my spread thighs, then undid the fly and tugged them down to his thighs, along with the boxers underneath.
His cock was hard and bobbing in the air, pointed right at me. I wrapped my hand around the length, my body trembling with anticipation. I lay back, my legs going around his hips to hold on as I guided him to my entrance.
“Rachel,” he whispered, sounding reluctant, almost tortured.
I just moaned, wrapping my free arm around him. I shifted my lips against him, gasping when the head of his cock touched my sex. I used him a little, pressing the head of his cock down on my clit, making my body shudder. Then with a slight shift of my hand and hips, he was sliding into me, and I sighed as I tightened my limbs around him, pulling him all the way inside.
“Rachel,” Jason whispered again.
He leaned down, laying his body down on mine. He wrapped his arms around my back, holding me close, as he pressed his lips to mine in a kiss.
“I missed you,” he said.
I smiled into the kiss, keeping my eyes closed, even as my body moved restlessly against his.
“I missed you, too,” I admitted.
He started to move. Slowly at first, careful thrusts that rubbed against my walls and hit all the right spots. My nails dug into his back; my feet pushed into his ass cheeks. My gasps and moans were muffled by his mouth against mine, and I couldn’t tell him just what I wanted.
But this was Jason. And if I knew him best, then he knew me best.
After long moments of teasing, that I didn’t mind anyway, he picked up his pace. His thrusts became a little faster, and he’d pull out further for more depth. His hips rolled against mine with every thrust, until he was fucking me hard and fast.
“Jason,” I groaned out in a gasp, holding on tighter.
The ground wasn’t the most comfortable of places. But, with his arms around me and with my limbs around his, I could barely feel it. All I could feel was an overwhelming pleasure that grew and grew inside me. Until, eventually, it burst, and I let out a short scream before I could muffle it as I came harder than I ever had before.
Jason groaned, not stopping as I convulsed hard on his cock. Then his thrusts became erratic, his hips jerking against mine as I felt the warmth inside me from his release.
We slumped into the blanket, holding on tightly to each other as we panted for breath, sated.
Chapter Thirteen
Jason
Another week had passed, and in that time, Rachel had been going less and less to her place. She’d all but moved in with the child, and most of his stuff was put into the extra room. I was still coaxing her to bring more of her stuff. Eventually, I would talk her into moving in permanently.
If only it would be that easy. We had to talk, I knew, not just have sex, which we were doing plenty of in between work. It was a wonder we hadn't been caught yet. Or at least, I thought we hadn't been caught. I was getting sick and tired of running around in secret, though.
Tonight, I planned to have her join me in my room for the first time.
Because she was coming with more stuff, I’d insisted on her leaving work early to bring him back. I hated the times when she had to call the sitter for him instead of just tagging him along. I hadn't spent much time around him, and the most I did was hear him cry. But, I’d grown used to the thought of him being my son.
When I heard a car coming up the drive, I rushed out the house, feeling anxious. I gave a quick nod to the ranch hand that had given her a ride and went to help her get her stuff while she got out with the toddler. Then we walked into the house with her cooing at the boy, and I got to watch without her noticing.
They look so amazing together…
I’d never thought much about being a dad, but I had to admit, more than getting used to it, that I could learn to absolutely love the image in front of me. Rachel and I had been getting along as of late, and maybe…just maybe…she and I could be a family, with our toddler in the middle. I would give my son the family I never had growing up.
We were in the room, with me by the doorway as Rachel set down the child when I realized I’d overlooked something important.
“What’s his name?”
She paused and looked up at me at the unexpected question. I was frowning at her.
“What?” she squeaked.
I arched an eyebrow, wondering what she was so freaked out about, but I didn’t ask. I had a pretty good idea, anyway.
“I just realized I never asked.”
“Oh,” she said. “His name is Jack.”
Jack…
He’d already fallen asleep, and Rachel set him in the crib.
“Can you tell me who the father is?” I asked slowly.
Rachel turned to me, looking spooked again, and I wondered if she knew just how easily she’d given herself up.
“A one-night stand,” she blurted out. “That, uh… I don’t remember him, so…”
I narrowed my eyes at her, and she fidgeted. She kept shifting on her feet, hands clasping together and twisting, then clutching at the skirt she was wearing.
She’s not ready, I realized. I’d have to wait for her to tell me the truth. But, I could still enjoy myself in the meantime.
“Do you have the baby monitor set up?” I asked abruptly, changing the subject.
“Huh?” she blinked at me, going still, confused at first. Then her face lit up, and she looked around the room as she nodded. “Uh, yeah. I set up the microphone end already, and I take the speaker with me wherever I go.”
“And where’s that?”
She picked it up out of her things to show me.
Satisfied, I grabbed her wrist and dragged her behind me. She gasped, but didn’t resist. I pulled her over to my room a couple of doors down, where the noise wouldn’t carry over to the toddler. I picked up the baby monitor, set it on top of the dresser where it would be out of the way, then pulled her over to the bed.
Rachel groaned, but it wasn’t exactly in protest.
“Couldn’t you have waited for this? It’ll be dinner soon…”
“You can help me cook afterward,” I said insistently. I brought us to a stop beside the bed and turned back to her. “I’ve wanted to take you while we’re in here for a while. I never brought you home, remember?”
She rolled her eyes. “No. Nathan did that for you.”
“I always thought the two of you were too close,” I muttered.
Then, I ducked my head for a kiss, and there was no more talking.
We stripped each other down quickly, and I paused now and then to listen to the baby monitor. But little Jack didn’t wake up. Minutes later, we were lying on the bed on our sides, making out to our heart's content. Then, Rachel pushed me, flipping me over to straddle my thighs. She grinned down at me as I stared at her in surprise.
“Hey, there,” she said, teasing.
She reached down between us, wrapping her fingers around the base of my cock. She gave a couple of strokes, and I watched in fascination as she rose up on her knees, holding my cock up between her legs. With a twist of her hips, I could feel her walls sliding down on me. My hands moved to her hips, and I held my breath as she slid all the way down, until her ass cheeks sat on my thighs.
I tried to rise from my position so I could kiss her. But she pressed both her palms against my shoulders and shook her head.
“Oh, no,” she said, sounding breathless. There were two high spots of pink on her cheeks. Her lips were parted as she panted for breath, wisps of her hair sticking to her already sweaty forehead. “You’re going to lie down and let me do it this time, Jason. This is my show.”
All I could do was groan and do as she said. I watched, as she rose up on her knees until only the tip of my cock remained inside her, then slammed down, making us both cry out. She did it again, and again, bouncing in my lap. My eyes couldn’t decide where to rest; on her face, with her amazing expressions of pleasure; her breasts, bouncing with every bounce of her hips. Or, the place where we were joined, watching my cock disappear in and out of her as she took what she wanted from me.
“Fuck, yes,” I growled, settling on all three, my eyes going up and down her body.
I was getting a little impatient, though. I rose my knees, planting my feet on the bed, as I firmed my grip on Rachel’s hips. Then, I moved. As she slid down, I thrust my hips up into her, and as she rose up, I pulled back. We worked up a rhythm that had us both orgasming minutes later, Rachel calling my name as I bit back the shout that wanted to rise out of my throat.
Cowboy Daddy Page 5
