by Andrea Jones
“Need?”
“It sounds cold to put it thus.” He blinked. “The woman I want.”
“Still, you sound cold. Do you mean desire? Or love?”
“…Yes.”
She pushed herself back to sit up higher. “You will excuse me if I fail to swoon. I am becoming accustomed to such declarations.”
“Do not mock me!”
“No, once again, I only tell you the truth.” She laid her hand on his arm, becoming aware yet again that his was a swordsman’s arm, firm beneath the velvet. “It is also true that I appreciate your frankness, Doctor. I have done so from the first, even though you don’t yet appreciate mine. I must say, you are most attractive when most uncomfortable— for instance, when you are speaking of things you would much rather hide.”
Urgently, he hiked himself closer to her. “Please, Madam, we haven’t the time to spend in flirtatious pretense, nor am I skilled in it. Perhaps you yourself aren’t aware of it, but this morning you gave me to understand— that is, I have begun to believe…”
“No. I gave you nothing but a clear picture of our situations.”
“Yes, exactly. I am now attempting to do the same. Ah, perhaps I should approach the subject from another direction. Tell me, honestly. I know— I am not an innocent— what you give to Hook. You have made me understand that particular situation perfectly.”
“If I shocked you—”
“I find there is no time for shock, Madam. What I want to know is, what do you really feel for this man?”
“You have heard the tales. You know his legend. He is rich, he is strong. Hook has everything—”
“He has you.”
She regarded him steadily. She paused briefly. “Yes.”
“Lady. Has he your heart?”
“Any woman could give him what I give. If he didn’t believe he held my heart, how would I be preferable? I am uniquely placed, Doctor. I cannot go back, and I cannot move on.” She shot him a bold look. “Yes. I give him my heart.”
“Why then, if Hook values you so highly, does he not marry you? Despite his casual use of you, he has demonstrated even to me that he is willing to fight for your honor. Marriage is the least he could give in return for your affections.”
“Doctor Hanover, don’t you see? That kind of marriage is simply an act of law. What use has any pirate for any law?”
“Of course. And you emulate him, operating within your own set of rules. But I have always thought of marriage as a sacred institution, one I have found worthy to uphold.”
“It is pointless to conjecture; I am satisfied with my position.”
“So you claim. But…what if I could redeem you to polite society?”
Scorn edged her laugh. “I told you before. Polite society will want nothing to do with me!”
“You would be accepted with no questions asked, if you were to return…as my wife.”
Jill stared. She opened her lips. She counted slowly to five, then took a deep breath. “You counsel me to remain quiet, Doctor. Is this how you think to calm me?”
“The best possible treatment for you, Lady, is to leave this ship and begin a new life. An honorable life, as an honest woman. Yes, this is my counsel. I hope you will take it. I dare to hope you will take me.”
“I challenge you to find a woman more honest than I! It is my honesty that most disturbs you.”
“Perhaps you are right. I am only sure there is none to match you.”
“And where exactly would we find this ‘honorable’ life, Sir?”
“Not in England, unfortunately. But in my homeland. Heidelberg, or Vienna.”
“And live the rest of my days pretending—”
“Your truth does indeed wound me, Madam!”
“I don’t mean pretending to care for you— that might come easily if I allowed it— but pretending to be other than I am. Is this how ‘honest women’ live? I suppose you will suggest next that I should wear gloves at all times, to hide the shameful stain of my experience?”
“You could hardly explain such a blemish.”
“Yet you yourself bear your experience on your cheek.”
His hand hurried to his jaw. “My mark is one of honor.”
“And so is mine.”
“Only in this depraved world of piracy. Surely to be accepted among society is worth some sacrifice?”
“You must have noticed,” she said. “One sacrifice is never enough for society.”
“But to live among decent people again—”
“Decent people have always disappointed me.”
“But I shall not. If you’ll only come away with me, I will prove it to you.”
She smiled again. “Raising the question of your own decency. But even if I were so inclined, and for many reasons I cannot say I am, just how do you think to accomplish it? Do you expect Captain Hook to bend to the propriety of your suggestion? To bless our union and send us off in a skiff full of rice and flowers?”
“You must trust me. I believe a way off this ship has opened for us. I cannot yet be certain.”
“Doctor Hanover. Please leave now. I can’t listen to any more of this fantasy!”
His whole being inclined toward her, as if he longed to touch her. “Madam— Jill! I assure you, this is no fantasy.”
“Don’t speak to me again until you know what you are offering. I will hear no more— no more— until you have real means of deliverance. Until you can tell me everything, tell me nothing!”
“Yes. Yes, I understand. I will do as you ask.”
“No, you don’t understand, but you will. Until you can tell me not only of your plans, but also of yourself, I won’t even consider marriage to you. Why, for example, Sir, can you not return to England?”
The surgeon stiffened and pulled back.
“As you see, I am many things, but I am not foolish— Johann.”
Again, shock struck his face. “You know my name? But how?”
“In the same way, maybe, that you surmise I am the wife for you. But guessing about a husband isn’t acceptable, Johann. The life I lead may be questionable to the world at large, yet I know who and what I am. I can guess your name, but I don’t yet know who you are.”
“I am the man who will save you. I will take you away from here and—”
“Here, I have some measure of control over my destiny. I am a queen. I won’t trade my position and my identity for any mysterious ‘maybe.’ I will know your history. I will know your secrets. I will hold them in my red-handed grasp before I set foot on ‘societal’ soil again!” Angrily, she averted her eyes.
Hanover bristled, but as he regarded her loveliness, his face softened and his tension took a new course. When he spoke, his voice was low, intense, a thrilling mixture of control and passion.“If you would allow it, if I were not a gentleman, I would take you tightly in my arms right now, and kiss the very life from your body.”
Jill still didn’t look at him. She cast her gaze down and sucked in her breath. Quite suddenly, she believed him. This time, she concealed the shiver.
“You ask me not to touch you. But I will. I touch you with words, today, now. I will touch you with my hands, one day. And then, what will I not do? When the law I obey determines that you belong to me, I will not leave any part of you untouched.”
Like the gray-eyed girl she was just beginning to comprehend, Jill didn’t speak. She listened.
Keeping his arms in check, he leaned closer. “You want to hold my secret, woman? Yes, I would lavish the same carnal love upon you as do any of these pirates. You make me admit the truth: I own the same passion. And I have the means to induce it…in you.”
His eyes fired as they claimed her gaze. He held his graceful frame poised above her. His lips formed an ironic smile. “And like your pirates, I would even bring you jewels, if you wished.”
Her gaze traveled downward, to his medicine bag.
“Diamonds,” he said, as if he stole her thoughts.
He was to
o adept. Too close to her weakness. Now she understood why the captain had insisted Smee should guard her. Grateful to feel the bo’sun’s protective presence on the other side of the door, she only hoped he couldn’t see her. Neither Smee nor the doctor would need instruments to gauge her heartbeat now.
“Now you hold, Madam, the secret of what I will and will not do.”
Except for her breathing, the lady lay still. Hanover remained some moments, leaning above her, then slowly corrected his posture and pulled his coat cuffs into place with a series of smart little tugs. He looked down on her, approving.
“She is an intelligent woman who knows when to remain silent.” He considered her, and then he shook his head. “I cannot argue with what you have said this evening. You are altogether wiser than I perceived, and I admire you the more for it. I am confident that not only are you the woman I need— I am the man you need. But good fortune, perhaps, does not come to us so readily. Not today, at any rate.” He squared his shoulders. “All right. I agree. We will discuss the subject only when I can assure you of my integrity, and of our good chance of escape.”
Warily, Jill lifted her eyes to meet his. “You do not ask me, Sir, to tell you more of my history.”
“No.”
“And when will you do so?”
He angled his head in a gesture of dismissal, and as he opened his mouth, she interrupted.
“Do not say ‘never.’ I am not such a fool.”
“Very well. Then my answer is…‘Not today.’”
She smiled, surprised at how difficult it was to do. “And that is my answer, also.” She steadied her voice and raised it, to warn Smee away. “Please, send Liza to me now, so that I may follow your sage medical advice.”
“I will. Whether or not you truly required it.”
“I can tell you honestly, I am very glad to have received it.”
The doctor regained his professional tone. “Regarding my earlier question, which you were unable to answer. I will ask you when we speak again, and if you are seriously considering my proposal, I expect you to say truthfully that you have, indeed, slept. Soundly and,” his surgeon’s voice was insistent, “undisturbed.”
Her eyes widened. “And I hope to answer, also, the question I didn’t have a chance to answer, and tell you he does not strike me!”
“You are, truthfully, a persuasive woman. I have every faith in your abilities.” Hanover opened his bag and drew out a small glass vial. Moving with deliberation, he placed it on her lap, laying it over her warmest point, and applying a gentle, rousing pressure. “But should you encounter difficulty in carrying out my orders, I prescribe this sleeping draught.” He withdrew his hand.
She looked down at the amber liquid slithering within the glass. She didn’t touch it. “If I should accept your…orders, how much would you recommend that I take?”
“None.”
She turned toward him quickly, questioningly.
“One half teaspoon in a few ounces of water will allow you very easily to lay a strong man’s temper to rest.”
She had been wrong, before. He was most attractive when he was comfortable.
“I see,” she said. “I see you are resourceful. But both the captain and I are passionate creatures. Such an arrangement couldn’t possibly last many nights. It is my hope that you and I may answer all of one another’s questions. Very soon.”
Hanover’s trace of a smile was smug. “I would never be so discourteous as to keep a lady waiting. For anything she might require.” He reached out to her. “Madam.”
Slowly, watching his gray eyes triumph, she slid her crimson fingers into the manicured cage of his hand. He seemed to have overcome his distaste for their coloring. He brought her fingers to his lips and kissed them leisurely, one at a time, as he regarded her, then turned her hand upward to gain access to the inside.
“If you will allow me?” His thumb stroked her palm.
Gradually, she pulled her hand away. His remained empty, in the air. Her other hand secured the vial in her lap, over her warmest point.
“I can answer one question now, Doctor. I will allow you to kiss me. But…‘Not today.’ ”
§ § §
By the time Liza reentered the master’s quarters, her hands behind her back, Jill appeared to have recovered from her malady. Standing as abandoned as a boy, legs apart and head thrown back, she faced the sideboard, pouring herself a splash of something from a brown bottle. She strode to the window seat and flung herself down among the cushions. “Bring my dressing gown and come unlace me, Liza. I need to breathe!…Look, the moon is beautifully bright tonight.”
Liza kept her eyes on the mistress looking at the moon and padded to the daybed. She bent and, without a sound, tucked her father’s walking stick beneath it. Then she opened the wardrobe and took down Jill’s robe. She held its slippery fabric close to her plain brown dress, remembering the muscular thighs that had pressed their nakedness against it. Smiling as easily as Jill now, she approached her mistress and determined that the glass contained the same spirits she had tasted on Tom. Liza recognized the smell.
“That moon must be shining everywhere tonight. Even over my old home, far away in London. Tell me, Liza. Do you miss Bristol? Friends or family there?” She sipped the rum.
The look of confusion on the girl’s face was answer enough; Jill had guessed another of the doctor’s secrets.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I’ve mixed it up. I thought I remembered your father say Bristol.” Quickly, Jill’s intuition filled one more gap in the story. “It was Bath, wasn’t it?”
Liza studied the floor. Then she nodded.
“Yes. I thought so. What an interesting place to live! People travel there from all over the world, I believe, to take the waters. Your father must have attended many rich and exotic patients.”
The girl plucked at the dressing gown in her arms. On her finger she felt the presence of the pearl ring. As she stood, she favored one leg.
“Well, I have good news for you, Liza. I’ve found you a tutor. You will soon begin your reading lessons. But, ‘not today.’ Perhaps tomorrow!”
Liza’s face showed no change in expression. Jill’s was delighted. “You shall receive your instruction right here in my cabin.”
The girl’s eyes reflected alarm, then interest. But her silly hopes were dashed immediately.
“Don’t be afraid. I’ll be pleased to stay with you. There aren’t many rules to this game, but after all, it wouldn’t be proper to be alone in my quarters— with a gentleman.”
Baffled at first, Liza began to unpuzzle the mystery behind Jill’s sphinxlike smile. The woman was still smiling a few minutes later as Liza hung her dress away. The girl continued to observe. Captain Hook had entered, and the cabin overflowed with his presence. Both females immersed themselves in him.
As promised, Hook was bidding his lady good-night, and sharing the rum in an extremely intimate manner. And for the second time that evening, Jill’s breath really did come too rapidly, and she truly did feel weak.
But she had no intention of following the doctor’s sage advice. Not tonight.
§ § §
The ship’s surgeon accepted the order to remain on the Roger while the captain caroused aboard L’Ormonde. The irony was maddening, but Hanover was well able to control his annoyance, and his demeanor was calm as he braced himself for the next challenge. Under the genteel guise of curiosity, he volunteered to entertain the visitor and to escort him topside once the two ships were realigned and preparations for boarding were in readiness. But he was in no mood to take any nonsense from the Frenchman. As he stepped into the galley, he made sure LeCorbeau was alone, then checked the deck behind himself before closing the door.
“Well, LeCorbeau. It is extremely fortunate that you have found me.”
LeCorbeau sprang to his feet to confront him. “Yes, I have found you. Did you think I would not?”
“It is of no consequence. You are here.”
“I
am. But, quelle surprise, Doctor— eh— Hanover!” He approached in measured steps, his hands locked together behind his back. “Imagine my distress! I return from the rendezvous with my contact from Alexandria. I receive your message. I locate your ship, run her down, board her,” the privateer frowned peevishly and leaned into the doctor’s face, “only to discover that you have vanished from her.”
Hanover stood erect to look down on the Frenchman. “Imagine my own distress, LeCorbeau, when I was abducted by pirates!”
“Well. Your little change of plan has inconvenienced me a great deal.”
“I assure you, Captain, the change was no part of my plan. You may sulk, but I am far more inconvenienced than you.” He threw his hands up. “I am a prisoner on this ship!”
LeCorbeau stalked to the table, sat down and leaned back, lacing his fingers together and fluttering them. His hard little eyes looked the doctor up and down. “Oui. A prisoner who dines at the captain’s table and holds the hand of his mistress when she is fatigued from too much love-making!” His fingers stilled as he leveled a stare at the doctor. “I begin to wonder, Monsieur, if our heretofore profitable partnership has been dissolved. You now appear to receive everything you need from my friend Captain Hook.”
“You doubt my integrity?”
The privateer raised one finger. “Not only I, but also those you left behind on the Julianne. She is a ship empty of cargo, and full of suspicion.”
“How dare you suggest—”
“Interestingly, Doctor, it was not I who first raised these doubts. It was the captain of your former vessel. Captain Whyte. He seems to feel that your disappearance, alone, might have been happenstance. But that your daughter, also, was taken, and all of your belongings…” His hands supplicated. “Well. Who could believe a pirate crew would be so considerate in choosing which articles to confiscate? Certainly not I!”
“But it happened in just that way! I knew nothing of Hook’s movements, and until your appearance I had no idea even that the Julianne survived his assault.”
“Oh, yes. She survived. Alors, it would have been better for us if she had not. Hook, as usual, makes the complications. He fancies himself a civilized man. He never forces when he can persuade, it is part of his charm! And Hook preserves his own interest always. Mon Dieu! If he sank every ship he sacked, there would soon be no more prey to devour! But this way, the Julianne can procure more bounty to carry to him, and her sailors will live to spread his fame in every pub and port from here to his beloved England, where he himself can now live only in legend!”
