His mind flashed to his mother then. She’d been in the next room and he hadn’t been able to save her. She’d been killed with him lying only a few feet away and he’d had no idea it was happening.
Brett gritted his teeth. Where the fuck had that come from?
“Everything okay?” Ian asked.
“Yeah. Just thinking about something. Old memory.”
His mother had nothing to do with Tallie. Nothing. Why think of the memory at all?
Because it made him feel lost and out of control, that’s why. He’d left Tallie in Williamsburg because there was no reason to stay, but he still wanted to be there with her. Protecting her.
Jace Kaiser walked into the ops center then, looking about a million times happier than he had a few months ago. Jace had always had a closed off, secretive look about him. Now he looked like a kid who’d gotten a pony nearly every time Brett saw him. The dude glowed with happiness.
“Hey, Brett. How was Europe?” he asked when he got close enough.
“European.”
Jace snorted. “Heard you saw my sister in Austria.” His expression turned serious. Brett was one of the few who knew that Calypso was Jace’s sister. “How’d she look?”
“Determined,” Brett said. “Otherwise, she looked fine. She was nice to Tallie. Not nice to me.”
“I don’t think she entirely trusts us,” Jace said, glancing at Ian.
“She will eventually,” Ian said. “That’s the goal anyway.”
“Yeah, but I don’t know if we should trust her,” Jace added.
Brett couldn’t say that he disagreed with that statement. Calypso—Natasha—was a loose cannon in the broadest sense of the word. She worked for the Gemini Syndicate and she had a string of kills that would put the best military snipers to shame. She hadn’t lived as long as she had by being trusting or trustworthy. She was a woman who took her opportunities as they came.
Ian’s phone rang then. He glanced at it before picking it up. “Gotta take this, ladies.”
Jace and Brett stepped outside the office and pulled the door closed.
“Hey, Jace?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I ask you something?”
Jace shrugged. “Sure. I may not give you an answer though.”
“Nah, it’s nothing like that.” Brett gazed at the heads bent over desks in the ops center, the giant screens that took up an entire wall and showed the hot spots where Ian had Bandits engaged. It was a military operation, but on a broader scale. The rules were different for them than for the military—meaning there often were no rules.
This was his life, the life he loved—and yet, he felt a strange kind of emptiness in being here too. One he hadn’t felt before.
“When did you know that Maddy was the one? That it wasn’t just the newness of being with her that turned you on and made you crazy for her?”
Jace’s eyebrows climbed his forehead. Then he grinned. “Oh man, never thought I’d see the day when you of all people would ask me that.”
“I know, I know,” Brett grumbled. “I was married to the mega-bitch from hell and I swore I wasn’t ever getting serious about another woman again. But this thing with Tallie doesn’t feel like that did. It’s… different. Tallie is different. And I don’t know if it’s because she’s different that I like her—or if there’s something more.”
Jace slung an arm around Brett’s shoulders. “Look, I can’t tell you if you’re in love with this woman or not. I can’t tell you what that feels like for you. I knew I loved Maddy because I couldn’t imagine life without her, because my life was better with her in it and the idea of being without her made me utterly fucking miserable. I was going to give her up, because I thought it was safer for her if I did—but turned out that wasn’t my choice to make. Not alone anyway. And Maddy decided that I was full of shit and she wasn’t giving up easily. So here we are, living together and making it work. And you know what?”
“What?”
“I’d give this—” He waved his hand around the ops center to encompass it all. “—Shit up in a heartbeat before I’d ever give Maddy up. I’d dig ditches if I had to. I’d shovel shit at the racetrack and call myself lucky. That, my friend, is how you know what you’re feeling. What are you willing to give up?”
“Yeah, but you didn’t give it up.”
“No, I didn’t have to. But I would. Without a second thought. You have to ask yourself, if push came to shove, which could you live without? Tallie or BDI?”
“I don’t know yet.”
Jace patted his shoulder and then let him go. “Figure it out, my friend. Before someone else figures it out for you.”
Brett didn’t quite know what that meant. But he knew Jace was right. He had to figure it out. And then he had to do something about it.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Tallie’s phone rang and she snatched it up when she saw who it was. Brett had been gone for eight days now and she missed him like crazy. He hadn’t been able to come for Thanksgiving, much to her disappointment. She might have thought he was letting her down easy, but he kept calling and texting her so she decided if he really didn’t want to see her, he had a weird way of going about it.
Sharon had told her to stop overthinking it and imagining the worst. Brett lived three hours away and had a demanding job, so she had to give the guy a break in Sharon’s words.
And that’s what she was doing—even if it wasn’t easy.
“Hey,” she said happily. “I was wondering if you’d call.”
“Hi, Tallie. You thought I wouldn’t call?”
Tallie felt the heat blooming in her cheeks. She settled into her bed and picked up the cup of tea she’d made. Chamomile to help her go to sleep. It’d been a busy day at work and she was feeling a little blue because tomorrow was the anniversary of Josie’s death, but hearing from Brett made her feel better.
“I know you’re busy. I wondered if you’d have time.”
“As long as I’m not out of pocket and unable to call, I always have time for you, Tallie.”
His words made her glow inside. “Thank you, Brett.”
“How was your day? Did you design anything spectacular today?”
Tallie smiled. “I had a consultation with a newly married couple who want to decorate their first house.” Her kind of customers because they had a limited budget and needed the most bang for the buck. Flea markets, bargain shopping, that kind of thing. No custom pieces. Her mother had frowned imperiously but hadn’t said anything. “Oh, and Sharon’s new boyfriend is buying a house that needs some renovations, so he wants a design plan.”
He was planning to spend some serious coin, and her mother was happy about that—though apparently concerned that he’d insisted on Tallie doing the work, thanks to Sharon.
“Have you met him yet?”
“Not yet. He was out of town on business, apparently. But he’ll be back soon. I’m going with Sharon to the house tomorrow to make some initial measurements and get an idea what needs doing.”
“Sounds like fun.”
Tallie laughed. “For me, yes. For you, probably not. There’s not a bad guy in sight.”
He snorted. “That’s not always a bad thing.”
“No, I suppose not.”
“What time are you doing this measuring? I thought I’d head down tomorrow and spend a couple of days with you.”
Tallie’s heart skipped. “Really? Oh, that would be great. I’ve missed you,” she added shyly. She’d been thinking about her feelings since the minute he’d left and she was positive that she’d never quite felt like this before. She was miserable without him, but she didn’t want to admit it to him.
Because she didn’t know if he felt the same way and she wasn’t going to put herself out there just to be crushed when he backed off. Far better to act cool about the whole thing and see what happened.
“I’ve missed you too, Tallie.”
Heat flooded her, warming her from head to toe.
If he was here right now, she’d wrap her arms around him and kiss him senseless. Then she’d lead him to the bedroom and unbuckle his belt before sliding his zipper down and…
Tallie shook herself. He’d asked her a question. “Oh, you asked what time we’re measuring. I’m meeting Sharon at three. It shouldn’t take more than an hour.”
“Then I’ll be there around four. Why don’t I take you both to dinner?”
Tallie smiled. “That would be great. I don’t know if Sharon can go, but I’ll ask her. I’m happy you’re coming, Brett.”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t make it for Thanksgiving, but I wasn’t planning to let you get through tomorrow without me.”
Her stomach flipped. “You know what tomorrow is?”
“You told me. In Bavaria. Yes, I know. And I’m sorry, Tallie. But I’ll be there with you.”
Tears pricked her eyes. “Thank you. I can’t believe it’s been a year. It still seems like I should wake up and find out it was all a bad dream.” She pulled in a breath. “We won’t go to the cemetery tomorrow. Mom wants to go next week. On the day we buried her.”
“I’ll be there for that too, if you want me to.”
“That would be nice. Thank you.” She sniffed. “Ian won’t mind?”
“He won’t mind. I’ve got the time.”
“How’s work for you? Nab any bad guys this week?”
He laughed. “Work is fine. And we’re always nabbing bad guys. That’s pretty much the definition of what we do.”
“I worry about you.” The words slipped out and she nearly groaned. Way to go, sounding like a needy girlfriend.
“Don’t worry about me, Tallie. I’m fine.”
“I know that,” she said, trying to sound light-hearted about the whole thing. “But I also know that you carry a big gun and you don’t appear to be the sort of man who slinks in the other direction at the first sign of danger.”
She was thinking of the chalet when they’d returned from the village that day. He’d known something was wrong—and he’d gone toward it, not away.
“Babe, wouldn’t you rather talk about something else?”
“Like what?”
As if she didn’t know. Whenever he called at night like this, they invariably ended up having phone sex. It wasn’t nearly the same feeling when she stroked herself into orgasm, but with his voice in her ear, it was still pretty hot.
“I’m lying in bed with my hand on my cock. And what I want, more than anything, is to watch you sink down on me, taking me inside your sweet pussy while your eyes dilate and your mouth drops open. But since I can’t have that, I want to talk about it.”
“So you can jerk off,” she said, her voice turning all sultry and heated.
“That’s right. I want to jerk off, Tallie Grant, with your sweet voice in my ear. And I want you to fuck yourself with your fingers as if I were there doing it. I want to hear you gasping when you come, and I want to know it’s because of me.”
Tallie set the tea down and flipped off the covers. Her hand drifted down, beneath her pajama bottoms, until she slipped a finger into her hot, wet folds. Her breath hissed in.
“I’m ready,” she whispered. “So ready.”
“So am I, baby. You make me hard.”
“You make me wet.”
“Touch yourself, Tallie. Slide your finger around your clit and pretend it’s my tongue.”
She closed her eyes and did what he said. “Oh,” she gasped. “Oh Brett.”
“Yes, baby. Just like that. You taste so good. So sweet and perfect. Faster, baby. Faster.”
She obeyed, rubbing herself faster, wishing it was him. She spread her legs wide, brought her knees up to her chest, and stroked herself.
“Brett—I’m going to come,” she gasped.
“Come, Tallie. Come for me.”
She wanted to drag it out, make it last, but when he commanded her over the edge, she went. “Brett! Oh, God. Oh, fuck—ooooohhhhh….”
Tallie’s body jerked with the force of her orgasm. Her inner walls clenched tight, but without him inside her it just wasn’t as good. Still, it was good enough to make her moan.
“Shit,” he said on a groan and she knew he was coming too. “Too fast,” he told her after they’d both drifted back down to earth. “I wanted it to last longer.”
“Oh Brett,” she said. “I love—” Tallie’s heart squeezed. “This,” she said quickly. “I love this. Doing this with you.”
He chuckled. “I love it too. But I love it with you even more.”
“Then hurry up and get down here. Because tomorrow night, I want to do this again—but with you inside me.”
“Babydoll, I want that too. More than you realize.”
They talked a little while more and Tallie started to yawn. Brett heard it.
“Go to sleep, Tallulah Margaret. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Okay, Brett. Night.”
His voice was warm in her ear. “Night, honey. Sleep well—because I’m not letting you sleep at all tomorrow night.”
She smiled, even though she was half asleep. “Mmm, sounds good….”
Tallie woke up feeling both rested and restless. She’d slept well, thanks to Brett and his kinky phone call, but she was also restless because of what the day signified.
One year ago today, Josie had been hit by a distracted driver and lost her life. So many people thought that texting behind the wheel was no big deal, but it was a big deal to Tallie. Not everyone who texted while driving would die, or hit someone and kill them, but why take that chance? Why couldn’t the text wait until they reached their destination? What was so all-fire important that it couldn’t wait?
In the case of the woman who’d hit Josie, it wasn’t important at all. She’d been texting her friends to tell them she was running late but she’d be there soon. And since she was paying more attention to her phone than the road, she’d run a stop sign and plowed into the driver’s side of Josie’s car at fifty miles an hour.
Josie’d had the right of way, but in the end it didn’t matter. She’d been t-boned and, in spite of wearing her seatbelt and obeying the rules of the road, she’d been the one who died.
It wasn’t fair. The woman who’d hit her was still alive, having served an absolute pittance of time for involuntary manslaughter, but she was out and she’d presumably just enjoyed Thanksgiving with her family. A thing Josie would never do again.
Tallie got into the shower and scrubbed her body vigorously before dressing in a sweater and leggings with ankle boots. She blow-dried and tousled her hair, slicked on lipstick and a bit of eyeliner and mascara, then stared at herself in the mirror before heading downstairs to grab a yogurt.
Her phone buzzed and she looked at the text.
Brett: Thinking of you today.
Warmth flooded her at his thoughtful text. Thinking of you, too. And thank you.
Brett: See you around four.
Tallie: I can’t wait.
Her fingers hovered over the little keyboard. She wanted to type three more words, but that was sheer insanity. If she told him she loved him, he’d probably freak out. And rightfully so since they’d known each other less than a month.
It was too fast—and yet she knew it was how she felt. But he didn’t feel the same, so it was best to keep it to herself for now.
Tallie drove to her mother’s shop, parked in the designated lot behind the store, and went inside to start her day. There were client meetings, design consultations, orders to complete, and shipments to check in. She’d recreated, as much as she was able, the record of the things she’d bought in France. The crate was on its way and would arrive in the next week or two, after a delay at the port.
Around two, Tallie met Sharon for lunch. They were planning to eat at a little café near the historic area of Colonial Williamsburg and then proceed to the house once they were finished.
Tallie arrived first. Sharon breezed in ten minutes later, looking excited. “Sorry I’m late,�
� she said as she took her seat. “Robert called to tell me he was at the airport and he’ll meet us at the house a little after three.”
Tallie blinked. “Wow. I admit I wasn’t expecting that. I mean I’m not really prepared to offer him any ideas just yet. Not until I’ve seen the house.”
Sharon reached out and put her hand on top of Tallie’s. Squeezed. “It’s okay, Tal. He doesn’t expect a complete design plan today. I’ve told him you and your mother are the best there is and he’s completely set on using Mary Claire Grant Interiors—and you. He’s a terrific guy. You’re really going to like him.”
Tallie smiled. She loved seeing her friend excited over a man. Sharon didn’t trust easily after her last boyfriend had cheated on her, but she had a big heart and she needed a man who would be patient and give her time. Tallie hoped Robert was that man.
“Okay. Brett is coming down around four. I’ll text him the address in case we’re still there. Maybe Robert can join us for dinner.”
Sharon smiled. “Maybe so.”
Tallie sent a quick text to Brett. He sent back a thumbs up. She told herself not to waste any time wishing it was a heart, but of course she spent time wondering why it wasn’t. Stop.
“Hold up,” Sharon said after they’d ordered. “What’s got you so preoccupied.”
Tallie blinked. Was it that obvious? “I’m thinking about Brett. I haven’t seen him in nine days now—and I miss him like crazy.”
Sharon looked smug. “I know you do.”
“You know?”
“Well of course. You’re in love with him.”
Tallie sat back against her chair, jaw hanging open. “How do you know that?”
“Because you talk about him a lot. And when you don’t talk about him, you’re daydreaming about him.”
“But that doesn’t mean I’m in love,” Tallie protested.
“Of course not. But I know you, and I haven’t seen you this worked up over a guy since, well, ever. You weren’t even this worked up about Calvin.”
“Calvin and I just sort of fell into a relationship. It was comfortable, but not exciting.”
Black Tie Page 19
