His crystal eyes returned to Black’s face, growing harder.
“…In fact, that element of our agreement has to occur prior to any detailed plans being made or shared between us. Plans in which we might share sensitive intelligence regarding resources, safe houses, personnel, and the like––all of that comes after a blood sharing. Not before. As I said, I will not negotiate on that point. Not in any way.”
Pausing, as if waiting to see if either of us would argue with him outright, he went on when neither of us spoke.
“Really, that is generous. I would prefer to read everyone in your group, and to let more than one vampire read a number of you, in the event I missed something. But I’m trying to be considerate of your, and especially your wife’s, likely sensitivities around this subject.”
“Does it have to be Black?” I blurted. “Why not one of the humans in our group? Black’s confided everything to them… to all of us.”
Brick gave me a humorless smile. “Is there some part of ‘non-negotiable’ that isn’t clear to you, my dearest Miriam?”
“What about me?” I blurted. “What if I did it instead?”
Black looked at me, his eyes hard. “No.”
“No?” I frowned at him. “You get to decide for me, but I can’t for you?”
Brick broke in before Black could answer, raising his voice slightly, his Louisiana accent growing more prominent.
“Again,” he said, sharper. “This concept of ‘non-negotiable’ seems to have escaped both of you. Shall I have one of my servants bring you a dictionary?”
When I turned, glaring at him, he chuckled.
“Dearest Miriam, I do so like it when you get fierce about your mate. It’s quite touching, truly. I confess, I have adored that trait in you since the very first night we met, at Konstantin’s house in California. Do you remember, my dear? Do you remember offering your own life for his? I seem to remember you saying you would do anything… absolutely anything I asked… if only I would let him go.”
Smiling, he clutched at his heart dramatically with the hand that wasn’t holding his drink.
“So romantic,” he said, smiling wider. “I was so very, very touched, dear heart. Truly. And what a tempting offer, on so many levels. Trust me when I say, I was loathe to refuse it.”
He took a sip of the mint julep, winking at me.
Next to me, I felt a reaction in Black’s light.
He suppressed most of it, and didn’t look at me, or change the pressure of his fingers in mine, but I felt him struggling to hide his reaction from my light.
Brick clearly saw some hint of that in Black’s face.
“Ah,” he said knowingly. “She didn’t tell you about that. Did she, Quentin?”
Black didn’t answer that, either.
Feeling pulses and ripples off his light as he turned over Brick’s words, I felt my jaw harden all over again.
“There has to be some other way,” I said, my voice nearly a growl. “It’s not good for him. It’s not good for him to do that. You know it isn’t.”
Brick’s crystal eyes once more shifted to mine.
“I will accept no substitutions for your husband, or for me, in this exchange,” he said. “It is absolutely non-negotiable. One hundred percent not able to be negotiated. As I said.”
Thinking then, he grunted a laugh.
“…And if you truly believe he’s shared ‘everything’ with you and the humans he employs, Miriam, I almost feel sorry for you. At the very least, I suggest you don’t know your mate as well as you seem to think.”
His voice grew colder.
“…That, or you are making a very foolish attempt to convince me of that which you know full well to be a lie. In either case, you are wasting your time.”
His gaze returned to Black.
Smiling at him, he took another sip of his drink.
“Well, Quentin?” he said, his voice pleasant. “Shall we get this part of things out of the way? It will save us much time, before we get into the nitty gritty of the rest of it. We’ll both, god-willing, know at least the basics of one another’s motives in this.”
Black frowned.
I saw him look at the seers and the humans sitting across from us.
Finally, reluctantly, he looked at me.
Before he spoke, I already knew what his answer would be.
He nodded slowly, jaw hard. “Agreed. But just you and me. I want everyone else out of here. Your people and mine.”
I stared at him, but he’d already averted his gaze.
Brick only smiled.
“Of course.” Glancing at the blond vampire, he fluttered his fingers.
The blond vampire, Dorian, rose smoothly and gracefully to his feet, as if made of solid muscle that weighed almost nothing. He walked to the door of the sunroom without a backwards glance, his feet making no noise on the tile floor.
The other vampires, who stood near that door, followed him out.
Black glanced at Cowboy, then at Kiko.
“Go on,” he said, gruff. “He’s right. This has to happen first.”
At Kiko and Cowboy’s exchanged skeptical looks, he waved a hand at them.
“Go,” he repeated. “I’ll be fine.”
He didn’t look at me, but spoke directly into my mind.
You too, doc.
“No fucking way,” I blurted.
Black flinched.
Cowboy, who’d been rising to his feet, along with Angel, Nick, Kiko and Manny, all turned, looking over their shoulders at me. Jem frowned in my direction, too, but I saw more understanding in his eyes.
“Send the others out if you want,” I said. “I’m staying, Black.”
Black frowned. Feeling the others’ eyes on me, he motioned for Cowboy to go.
“Go on. Miri will be following after you shortly.”
“No,” I said, louder. “I won’t.”
After a bare hesitation, Cowboy turned, motioning with his head for Angel and the others to follow him. The humans made their way in almost a straight line to the doors.
The two seers filed after them, almost like bodyguards.
Once they’d disappeared through the opening, Black turned to me.
I need you to go, Miri. Go out there with the others. Keep an eye on things in the other room. Make sure Brick isn’t using this as an opening to––
Fuck off, I sent back, angry. Don’t pull that “I need you to hold down the fort” crap on me. You want me gone. You and I both know exactly why you want me gone.
His mind fell silent.
He held my gaze, his gold eyes on mine. They shone so still I couldn’t read them, or him, at all. Even so, I felt glimmers of emotion in the background. It was intense enough that I felt my chest clench, even as I clenched my jaw, refusing to let it affect me.
Please, he sent. Please, Miri. Do this for me.
“No,” I said out loud. “Absolutely not, Black.”
Miri––
If you ever want me to trust you again, you’d better fucking let me stay, Quentin.
Pain visibly crossed his face. It was intense enough that I winced. A harder pulse of his light hit at me an instant later.
I could feel he hadn’t done that intentionally either.
I want you to trust me, his mind growled back. I want you to trust me, Miri. That’s why I need you to go.
I stared at him. My anger worsened.
“What?”
You said it yourself, he sent, equally angry. You fucking said it, Miri, more than once. I have a problem with this. I know I have a problem. I know I need to do something about it… but I can’t do anything about it in the next five fucking minutes.
Then let me stay, I sent back, my mind unmoving. If you have a problem with it, let me stay. Let me see it for myself. How the hell can I help you, if I don’t know what it is?
“You know what it fucking is,” he snapped, speaking aloud. “It’s fucking addiction, Miriam. You fucking know that. It’s not a
goddamned mystery.”
He was breathing harder, glaring at me with an anger that threw me at first, until I recognized what lived under it.
He wasn’t angry at me.
He was afraid.
Feeling eyes on me, I remembered Brick was sitting there, listening to this.
I turned before I’d thought, more in anger than embarrassment, or even concern that he might be learning more about me and Black than was healthy for either of us.
My anger flattened somewhat when I saw his expression.
Rather than smirking at one or both of us, like I expected, the vampire wore a surprisingly thoughtful expression––one he might not have meant for me to see at all. He frowned as he looked between us, as if trying to assess what he was seeing and hearing.
Feeling my stare, he looked at me.
Studying my expression, he frowned, then quirked an eyebrow at Black.
“She’s right, friend,” he said to Black, matter of fact. “You’re too late. You kick her out of here now, you’ll need my people to do it––and she’ll never forgive you for it, Quentin. Never. Moreover,” he said, nodding towards me. “She’s going to imagine far worse than what she sees if she stays. You may as well let her stay. Let her understand it.”
Aiming that quirked eyebrow at me, he assessed me with those crystal eyes.
“She is a clinician, is she not?” Returning his stare to Black, he made a graceful, flourish-like gesture with his free hand. “Perhaps she can employ that skill now. View this as a sociological phenomenon. A clinical problem to be solved, as she says.”
Black turned, glaring at the vampire.
The look in his eyes was sheer hatred.
I couldn’t help staring at the intensity behind it.
“I know why you want her to see it,” he growled to the vampire.
Brick made another lazy flourish with his hand.
“Yes? So?” Taking a sip of the mint julep, he shrugged. “I’m afraid it doesn’t make any of what I just said less true, my friend.” Pausing, he looked between us. “But by all means. Give me the word. I’ll call Dorian in here. Instruct him to drag your beautiful wife out of here kicking and screaming. I’m sure that will do wonders for your relationship.”
Black’s jaw clenched hard enough to push out a muscle in his cheek.
He looked at me, that anger still reflected in his eyes.
Then, looking away from both of us, he stood up, flipping the leather jacket he wore off his broad shoulders. Throwing it harder than necessary at the couch, he sat back down and held out one arm, his expression now cold as ice.
I knew that expression wasn’t only aimed at Brick.
Brick assessed Black’s face with some caution, anyway.
Once he had, he smiled faintly.
Leaning forward, he carefully placed his glass, still half-full of mint julep, on a tile coaster on the table to his left.
“All right, then.” The vampire smiled a touch wider as he glanced between us. “Let’s begin, shall we?”
17
BLOOD
I WATCHED AS Brick took Black’s forearm in both of his hands.
I recoiled from the feeling behind it, even then––even before they’d started. The vampire wrapped his long fingers around Black’s skin, pulling it closer to him without taking his eyes off Black’s face. Silently, he studied Black’s expression.
Then the vampire lowered his mouth, fangs extending as he dropped his head.
He paused for half a breath, giving me a wink––
Then sank his fangs sensually into Black’s wrist.
Black flinched violently.
He didn’t pull away though, or try to pull his arm away. I felt his reaction on more than one level. His light opened, seemingly outside his control, likely from the venom in the vampire’s fangs. He shifted his weight on the blue and white couch seat, his face tightening, even as his light flooded into mine.
I got hit with a wash of his emotions––disgust, anger at me, anger at himself, anger that I was there, shame that I was witnessing this, anger that I was watching, that I wasn’t even pretending not to be watching him minutely as he reacted to this.
I felt his hatred of Brick.
His disgust and hatred of Brick keened higher, growing overtly hostile, borderline violent the longer the vampire fed.
I wish I could say that was all of it.
I wish those were the only things I felt on Black.
Brick’s fangs sank deeper and Black let out a low groan, as if outside his control.
I felt it on both of them now.
Brick’s eyes closed, then half-rolled in pleasure, like a shark feeding. He let out a gasping sound, without raising his fangs, barely pausing as he drank.
Separation pain hit me from Black in a hotter flood of white-hot light.
I looked at his face.
Pain hit me as soon as I did. I felt my skin flush as I watched him, seeing his eyes flutter, his face go soft, nearly slack. He leaned deeper into the couch, eyes glazing, his pupils dilating so that the black nearly swallowed the gold. He was breathing harder, staring at Brick, only the heat and disgust had gone out of his gaze.
He closed his eyes as I watched, swallowing thickly.
When he opened his eyes next, he was looking at me.
I couldn’t tell if he even recognized me.
Some part of me wanted to reach for him, to touch him, yank him back to me in some way, but I didn’t move. I felt paralyzed––maybe in shock with how fast it was, how quickly he changed in front of my eyes. I tried to tell myself I knew this, that I knew how this was for him, just from the things he’d told me.
I’d even experienced it to a degree, when I got fed on by those vampires in New Mexico.
I could only imagine it got worse after being fed on repeatedly, and from what I could tell, Black had been fed on a lot in New York.
None of what I tried to tell myself, nothing I said to talk myself down from what I was seeing and feeling really penetrated. I’m not sure it would have felt much different to watch Brick give him a blow job.
I was still holding Black’s gaze when Brick reached up with one hand, gripping his shirt over his chest, his hand clenching into a fist. He let out another groan, lifting his mouth and licking his lips. Using the hand clenched in Black’s shirt, he yanked Black closer, lifting his mouth. Realizing what was coming, I moved without thought, without an instant’s hesitation.
“No,” I said.
I held up an arm between them.
When Brick turned, breathing harder, staring at me, his crystal eyes filled with dark crimson, it occurred to me what I’d just done.
It also occurred to me how overtly dangerous it was.
The heat rose in the vampire’s eyes. He looked at me, as if forcing back the aggression that came with that hotter lust. Then he turned to Black, staring at his eyes.
“I missed you, Quentin.”
Black didn’t answer.
He glanced at me, the barest look, then closed his eyes.
Brick returned his stare to me. “Take care, Dr. Black,” he said. “I am touched by your faith in my self-control, but I wouldn’t count on it, if I were you.”
“You’re not going to fuck my husband right in front of me,” I said, my voice thick, so cold I barely recognized it. “I’ll rip the heart out of your goddamned chest if you try it.”
Brick gave me a faint smile. “I only wanted a kiss.” His eyes were still hard with a thinly-veiled lust, but he had control again. “…Maybe more than one,” he amended, still looking Black over. “Your wife is greedy, Quentin.”
“Fuck off,” Black said, his eyes closed. “Have you gotten enough?”
Brick laughed. “You tell me.”
Black grimaced. He still wouldn’t look at me. When he opened his eyes, they focused on Brick alone. I knew the answer even before he spoke.
“No,” he said, his voice thicker than mine.
I bit my tongue, hard
enough to taste blood.
I watched Brick lick his wrist, then sink his fangs in again.
That time, Black only let out a gasp, but I felt so much pain and desire in his light, my own separation pain flared––badly enough, I closed my eyes, clenching my jaw. I didn’t realize my eyes were still closed until Brick let out a low laugh.
“Gods of the underworld, Quentin. I’ve never fed on one of you when their mate was present. Does she know I can feel her through you?”
Black’s eyes were still glazed, but harder, briefly shining with hate. “Stay the fuck away from my wife,” he said, gasping a little. “Stay the fuck away from her––”
“That’s not what you were thinking just now,” Brick smirked. “Shall I tell her what it was you were thinking, Quentin?”
Black grimaced, looking away.
“What am I thinking now?” he growled.
“You’re thinking you’d like to kill me,” Brick said, laughing. “You’re also thinking you’d like to fuck both of us right now. Or maybe have Miri blow you while I feed. Is that roughly accurate, Quentin?”
“Shut the fuck up––”
“Is she still your wife then, Quentin?” Brick smiled, his eyes equally glassed. “I have so very many questions for you now, my friend, given everything you’re showing me. I had no idea she left you over New York. No wonder you’re both so touchy––”
“Stay away from her, or I’ll kill you,” Black said, his voice a deep gasp. “I’ll kill every goddamned one of you. Is that clear enough?”
Brick let out a laugh.
His hand rose, fisting in Black’s hair.
“God. I wish I’d let you order her out of the room now,” he said, a heavier, near-growl in his voice. “You have no idea what I’d be doing to you right now, if she wasn’t here.” He glanced at me. “Neither does she. Should we tell her?”
Black grimaced, closing his eyes. I felt a harder pulse of his hatred, a denser, nausea-inducing curl of disgust, half of it at himself, half of it aimed at the vampire.
“She’s already going to fucking leave me for this,” he said finally, closing his eyes. “Tell her whatever the fuck you want.”
I let out a harsh laugh.
There wasn’t any humor in it at all.
I’m not even sure what the laugh meant.
In Black We Trust Page 24
