by Lori Wilde
Kelsey blushed at that memory, recalling how she’d been teased for the rest of summer camp for “sleepwalking”—because that was the excuse she’d given. At fourteen she wasn’t about to admit she’d had a crush on him.
That had come three years later, when they’d returned to Camp Hope as junior counselors.
All these years they could have been together if not for her mother. Then again, maybe not. What had happened, had happened. Wishing and hoping couldn’t change the past.
Kelsey let out a wistful breath, and forced herself to stop thinking about what might have been.
Right now, she was in bed next to Noah, wearing one of his T-shirts that was so big on her that it fell to her knees. A San Antonio Spurs T-shirt that smelled of his scent. She pulled the neck of the T-shirt up over her nose and breathed in the smell of him. Flared her toes. Savored the weight of his arm resting on her chest.
And at last, drifted off to sleep with a happy smile on her face.
Chapter 15
At eight o’clock on Monday morning, less than twenty-four hours since Kelsey had popped back into his life, Noah tiptoed into his bedroom with a cup of hot coffee and one of the French pastries that he’d gotten up to bake at six a.m.
He waved the pastry under her nose, hoping to rouse her with the yeasty scent.
When she didn’t move, he bent at the waist and whispered in her ear. “Wakey, wakey, Firefly. Time to let your light shine.”
Slowly, her eyes fluttered open. Kelsey stretched and offered him a shy, sleepy smile. “Hey.”
His heart torqued. Damn, but the sight of her in his bed did strange things to him. “Hey, yourself. How are you feeling?”
She held up her palms as if she’d forgotten about the abrasions. “Sore, but I’ll live. How about you?”
“The ice pack helped. I can see out of my left eye this morning. Thank you.”
“What are you telling your guests about your face?”
“That they should see the other guy.” He chuckled.
“It would be pretty interesting to see how Clifford Steel looks this morning.”
“I suspect he’s cursing our names,” Noah said.
“Or Filomena’s. If he’s not too hoarse. You did have your elbow jammed right up against his voice box.”
“Hey, I wasn’t about to let anyone hurt you.”
Kelsey cheeks pinkened and she smiled softly. Noah felt a corresponding softness slide through him. Uh-oh, he was leaving himself wide open to pain by liking her too much.
Noah picked up a bottle of over-the-counter anti-inflammatory pills sitting on the bedside table. “Take some of these. I did, and it made a world of difference.”
“Have you seen Sean and Tasha this morning?” she asked, holding out her bandaged palm for him to hand her the pills.
“I’ve seen Sean. He looks like Sylvester the Cat with Tweety Bird stuffed into his mouth. Guilty, but not the least bit ashamed about it. When I asked him how he slept last night, he grinned but didn’t say a word.”
“Hmm. I need to go check on Tasha and see how she’s doing.” Kelsey tossed the pills in her mouth and took a sip of coffee. “Oh yummy. Cappuccino. You remembered.”
“Firefly, you’re unforgettable.”
She dropped her gaze. “You used to tease me about cappuccino and you said I was only a play-like coffee drinker.”
“See, you remember a lot about me too.”
She sobered, set the coffee aside. “Noah,” she said. “What are we doing?”
“What do you mean?” He held his breath, not knowing how he wanted her to answer.
“You . . .” She waved a hand at him. “Bringing me breakfast in bed.”
“I just wanted to spoil you.”
“To what end?”
“Can’t a guy do something nice?” he asked. “I’m not your mother. I don’t have a hidden agenda.”
“Sorry.” Her eye twitched slightly. “I didn’t mean to sound so antagonistic.”
“You didn’t. It was a legitimate question.” Noah sat down on the end of the bed. Studied her. How could he give her an answer when he was just as confused as she?
Underneath the covers, Kelsey drew her knees to her chest, and wrapped her arms around her knees.
“I don’t know what we’re doing, Kelsey. I care about you, and I’m damn pissed that your mother still treats you like you’re seventeen.”
“I care about you too,” she murmured.
“I don’t know where that leaves us. I don’t know if it’s smart for us to be anything more than friends, especially after last night.”
Her mouth dipped in disappointment, but she nodded vigorously.
Good. They agreed. It disappointed him to say they should just be friends, but he had a good life going here. It wasn’t smart to mess things up by getting involved with Filomena James’s daughter again. He’d been down this road before. Had the scars to prove it.
“I’m sure she’s been blowing up my phone with angry calls and texts.” Kelsey cast a glance at her purse, which sat near the bedroom door where she’d dropped it the night before.
“Do you want me to get your phone?”
“Not yet. Let me just enjoy this yummy coffee and pastry first. Then I’ll figure out a way to smooth things over with my mother.”
“Why do you have to smooth things over? You’ve done nothing wrong. She’s the one who sent people to kidnap you. That’s not normal behavior. You should be able to go wherever you want, do whatever you want, without getting her approval first. You’re not seventeen anymore.”
Kelsey sighed and slumped back against the headboard. Surrender was her default position when it came to her mother. “It’s just easier to calm the waters and keep the peace than to argue with her.”
“So, Filomena always gets her way? At your expense? That doesn’t seem fair . . .” He paused. “Or emotionally healthy.”
She winced, her mouth pressing into a thin you-don’t-get-it line. But he did get it. He’d been at the receiving end of Filomena’s barbs.
Kelsey folded her arms over her chest, tucked her bandaged hands into her armpits.
Empathy rolled through him. Being raised by a woman like Filomena had to be brutal. Even more so because society put motherhood on a pedestal, as if some mothers weren’t downright toxic to their children.
He might be hot for Kelsey, and having some gangbuster sexual fantasies about her, but until she started living her life for herself, there was no hope for them. Bummer. The biggest obstacle keeping them apart as teens was as big as it had ever been.
If not bigger.
Kelsey was older now. More entrenched in the pattern. Less likely to fight back. Was it too late for her to change? Bigger question, why should he rock his own safe little boat? Life was good. Simple. Easy. Just the way he liked it.
Your life could be better, whispered a voice at the back of his mind. With Kelsey in it.
“What if Filomena demands you come home?” he asked.
“I won’t go.”
That lifted his hopes, but he was afraid to let them get off the ground. He was happy. Why muck that up by lusting after the wrong woman? In all honesty, they’d never been a good match. She came from an elite, hoity-toity world. He was a water rat from the wrong side of the river. He’d had the rich and famous lifestyle for a short time and he’d never felt comfortable in that privileged world.
“You sure?” he asked, testing her.
“I’ll tell her I’m staying because Tasha put together this great trip to help me get over the whole botched wedding thing.”
“That’ll put Tasha in the hot seat.”
“Ahh, Tasha won’t mind. She loves ruffling Filomena’s feathers.”
“I really like Tasha,” he said.
“I do too.” Kelsey forced a ghost smile, pale and gone quickly. “She’s the only one who’s not afraid of my mother.”
“I’m not afraid of her.”
“Excuse me? You let her bully
you into backing down ten years ago.”
“Hey, we were just kids. And she threatened to take away my scholarship. I—” Noah shoved his hands through his hair, pivoted on his heel, did a complete three-sixty. “No, I’m not doing this. I’m not justifying myself. You might feel like you have to constantly justify yourself to her, but I don’t.”
Kelsey’s bottom lip trembled, and that damn eye muscle of hers was twitching so hard she could hardly hold her eyelid open. “Why are you yelling at me?”
He had raised his voice in frustration. It must feel like yelling to her. The rapid twitching of her eye seemed to suggest that was the case.
He was no shrink, but he knew a few soldiers with PTSD. Military personnel and victims of crimes weren’t the only ones who could suffer from it. A lifetime of chronic emotional and verbal abuse could trigger PTSD too.
His heart cracked. His mind filled with images of all the ways Filomena must have made Kelsey suffer. Cruel, sinister, underhanded ways that left deep scars that no one could see. Scars far more damaging than the ones he’d suffered when he’d lost his mother to ALS. After his mother had died, he would get angry when kids complained about their moms. His thought had been that at least they had a mom.
But listening to Kelsey’s story, seeing the damage done, he realized there were worse things than having your mother die when you were young. His mother might have left the earth early, but while she’d been here, she’d been nothing but a radiant light of unconditional love. Giving him the strength he needed to keep his heart open and his mind clear. He couldn’t imagine growing up with a parent who manipulated and emotionally abused their child every step of the way.
Noah ached to bring Kelsey into his world. To change her direction and have her find safety in his arms. He wanted her to see that every single day could be like Christmas when you had the courage to claim happiness. To see the world with fresh eyes.
To see him with fresh eyes.
He was no longer that seventeen-year-old kid, terrified of her domineering mother. And he was no longer willing to simply be the blast from her past.
Right or wrong, Noah wanted more.
So much more.
He gave Kelsey the most loving look he could muster, peered deeply into her eyes, and whispered, “Let me know when you’ve figured out what it is you really want out of life, Firefly. Your freedom or your shackles.”
Noah’s parting words shook Kelsey up and pissed her off a little. He acted as if he knew her, and what was in her heart. The man hadn’t seen her in ten years. He didn’t know. He didn’t understand.
Dreading what she would find, Kelsey picked up her purse and rummaged around for her phone. Held her breath. Turned it on.
There was nothing from her mother. No texts. No missed calls. No emails. No private messages.
Total silence.
The hairs on her arms lifted. Her right eye jumped, and her stomach grumbled. This was not good. Not good at all. Filomena did not stay silent unless she was plotting revenge or on a giant sulk.
Both were equally dangerous.
If last night’s encounter was a squall, currently Kelsey was standing in the eye of the hurricane. Huddled in the deceptive moment when all went quiet, while outside the small zone of calm, a chaotic, ferocious storm raged.
Freaked out, Kelsey got dressed, left Noah’s room, and went in search of the one person who understood.
She found Tasha in the lobby having a gabfest with Raylene.
Tasha took one look at Kelsey’s bandaged hands and gasped. “What happened to you?”
“Filomena.” It was the only word Kelsey could get out. She gave Tasha a look that said I need to talk, now.
“Um,” Tasha said to Raylene. “I gotta go. Looks like my friend is at Defcon 5.” Tasha linked her arm through Kelsey’s. “Let’s go outside. Housekeeping is cleaning our room.”
They stepped out onto the deck of the paddle wheel boat. Sean was on the island, standing on a ladder in front of the gazebo stringing Christmas lights.
“Hi!” Tasha waved madly.
Sean dropped the strand of lights to wave back just as madly.
“Whatcha doin’?” Tasha called to him.
“Finishing up the gazebo before the decorating committee gets here this afternoon for the first round of judging,” Sean said. “Wanna help?”
“Maybe later,” Tasha called to him across the gap between the paddle wheel boat and the island. “Me and my BFF got things to discuss.”
“Am I one of those things?” Sean asked.
“Curiosity killed the cat,” Tasha said. “But if you feel your ears burning . . .”
Sean covered his ears with his palms and laughed out loud.
“C’mon,” Kelsey mumbled, grabbing Tasha’s wrist, dragging her down the gangplank and off the boat.
“Where are we going?” Tasha asked.
“Somewhere we can talk in private.” Tension twisted up every part of Kelsey’s body and her right eye jerked hard.
“You’re acting really weird. I’m scared.”
“Me too.” Kelsey walked over to the shed where the golf carts were stored and commandeered one. “Get in.”
“Mmm.” Tasha sent a lingering look at Sean. “Okay.”
Not even knowing where she was going, Kelsey maneuvered the golf cart over the dirt path, putting the Rockabye behind them. But it was a small island. How lost could they get? “Did you have fun last night with Sean?”
“Yes, we had a fab time, and Sean tastes as delicious as he looks. But forget about me. You’re ready to spew like Mount St. Helens. What happened?”
“It was Lewis Hunter I saw at The Horny Toad last night.” Kelsey told her about her mother’s foiled attempt at kidnapping her.
“That explains Noah’s face. Omigosh.” Tasha rested her hand on Kelsey’s forearm. “Your mother is a flat-out witch. I bet she’s been blowing up your phone.”
“No. That’s the truly scary part. Not a word. Not a peep.” Kelsey drove to the edge of the island overlooking the water. She could see the outlines of the buildings of Camp Hope in the distance. “Not a whisper.”
“Uh-oh.”
“I know.” Kelsey stopped the golf cart and sat trembling.
“I’m so sorry.” Tasha gathered her up in a tight hug.
Kelsey didn’t mean to cry, she didn’t want to cry, but a fat tear rolled down her cheek. Tasha pulled a packet of tissues from her coat pocket and passed them to Kelsey.
“Got any more of that Fireball?”
“We finished it off at the Ritz, remember?”
“Rats.” Kelsey straightened in her seat, dabbed at her eyes. She’d left the Rockabye with only a sweater and this close to the water she regretted not wearing a coat as a cold shaft of wind cut through her.
“I should go home. I need to go home and make this right before it gets worse.”
“Make what right? The fact that she can cause you to knuckle under just by giving you the silent treatment?”
Yes.
“You know this is actually a good thing, right?” Tasha got out of the golf cart, picked up a handful of pebbles and started skipping them across the lake.
Kelsey got out and joined her. Maybe moving around would generate some body heat and stave off the cold. “What is a good thing?”
“Radio silence from Filomena.”
“It just means she’s busy gathering her forces.”
“Like the Wicked Witch in The Wizard of Oz calling up her flying monkeys.” Tasha’s stone skipped four long hops across the lake. “Yep, I get that. But you can turn it into your advantage.”
Kelsey poked her tongue against the side of her cheek, pondered that theory. “How?”
“You gather your resources while she’s gathering hers.”
“What are my resources?”
“Me for one.”
Kelsey picked up a flat stone, curled her finger around it and flung it out across the lake in the direction of Camp Hope. The sto
ne skipped a full six hops before sinking into the water.
“Good omen.” Tasha applauded.
“For what?”
“Your third dare.”
Kelsey stopped throwing rocks, turned to look at her friend, her long braid whacking against her shoulders. Tasha’s first two dares had paid off. She’d reconnected with Noah and while her mind was in a tizzy, she was feeling stronger, braver.
“Let’s hear it.”
“Turn off your phone for the rest of our vacation.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Why not?”
“What if I have an emergency?”
“You can use my phone.”
“What if my mother has an emergency?”
“If it’s a real emergency she can call the hotel. She’s been tracking you. She knows where you are.”
“What about my dad?”
“You can tell Theo to call me if he needs to get hold of you.”
Kelsey felt a sharp sense of loss as it struck her that limiting contact with her mother also meant limiting contact with her father in order to keep him from the heat of battle.
Did she dare accept Tasha’s challenge?
“Filomena’s silent treatment is driving you crazy. Did you know that the silent treatment is actually a form of emotional abuse? I say fight fire with fire. Turn off your phone. Besides, you can’t really relax and do what you came here to do if you’re constantly checking your phone.”
“But if I turn off my phone, isn’t that giving her the silent treatment in reverse?”
“No, it’s setting boundaries. The woman tried to have you kidnapped, for crying out loud.” Tasha went on tiptoes to tap Kelsey’s forehead. “Let that fully sink in.”
“How about I just turn it off for a few hours?”
Tasha gave her a pointed stare.
“What if by ghosting my mother, she turns up here?”
Tasha shuddered. “Yeah, neither one of us wants that, but what’s the alternative? You have to break away sometime.”
Kelsey cocked her head. “Maybe I could turn it off for a day, since she’s ignoring me anyway.”
“Dammit Kelsey, you didn’t do anything wrong.”
Slowly blowing out a long breath, Kelsey nodded. “Two days?”
