Room 23

by Kavita Basi

  “I’m taking you to your first club,” I told her. “Here in the hotel.”

  “Oh my goodness!” she said, her face lighting up. “Mum!”

  I was much too tired to dance, but I watched my daughter dance to hip-hop on the dance floor. As tired as I was, I couldn’t stop smiling as I watched her. I was desperate to create new memories and experiences together. I knew this trip to Paris wouldn’t erase the horrific night of my accident and what she’d had to endure since, but I hoped with all my might it would help lessen the sting. I just wanted her to be happy.

  We got an early start the next morning to visit the Musée du Louvre. I had visited the Louvre before with my cousin, her partner, and Deepak, but this visit felt different. We weren’t on a timeline, and I people-watched as we stood in line in the cold for an hour, talking about what we’d seen the day before and what we planned to see later. This felt special, and I could feel the excitement of others in the air as we waited to gain entrance.

  Every art piece and painting in the museum had its own story.

  “I’ve always been so fascinated by art,” Jasmine said. “I guess because I’m not an artist. I’m stunned. It’s incomprehensible how people can create works of art like these.”

  I was taken by the Biblical paintings for some reason. I was drawn to the spirituality in the paintings. I felt compelled to stop and look at them more closely, in detail.

  Eventually we reached the most powerful and exquisite piece of artwork in the museum—the Mona Lisa. The first time I saw it, I was so surprised by its size; it was so much smaller than I had imagined. The picture I’d had in my mind from TV and movies was much larger. I figured it would overpower me just being in the room with it.

  So many people were crowded around the painting, excited to see it.

  “I’m going to FaceTime Deepak and Jay,” I said to the group. The irony wasn’t lost on me that I was sharing this historical wonder of the world—the Mona Lisa—with Deepak and Jay through modern technology.

  I felt the excitement of discovering something new for the first time, and was able to relive it watching the same in my daughter’s, sister’s, and niece’s faces.

  We sat at edge of the courtyard Restaurant Le Costes in Hotel Costes so we could see the full view. The courtyard restaurant buzzed with French as people smoked their slim cigarettes and gossiped. We sat at the perimeter on deep red velvet chairs and print Parisian sofas with mahogany tables and fringe table lamps.

  “We’re having such a wonderful time,” Rajni said.

  “Isn’t the food in France amazing?” I said.

  “I guess it’s not like we didn’t know it would be,” she said.

  A wave of anxiety came over me while we talked about what a great time we were all having together. I wanted everything to be perfect, but I couldn’t get away from the fact that I needed to rest between destinations. The more brainpower I had to use, the more tired I would get. And I knew any overexertion would cause headaches—or worse, another seizure. So far, two aspirin every four hours were getting me through.

  We finished the day by visiting the famous Ladurée, a patisserie and café. Ladurée was an opulent feast for the senses, from the pale blue duck-egg décor, wooden fixtures, and displays to the colorful macrons and pastries, chocolates, gifts, and tea.

  I retired to the car ahead of the group and had a nice chat with our driver.

  “Where will you go this evening?” he asked.

  “To Matignon.”

  “Before you leave you must visit Le Marais or Old Paris,” he said. “There are beautiful pre-revolutionary buildings and homes and many cafés and galleries.”

  That night, Rajni hired a nanny for Leah so she could stay out longer. When we were seated again in Le Restaurant Matignon, I asked the maître d if we could be moved.

  “Mom!” Jasmine said.

  I shrugged. “I want tonight to be perfect.”

  “But this is our third move!”

  “The final one,” I promised.

  Eventually we were seated on a high platform overlooking the entire restaurant. And looking down was a show. The atmosphere was incredible. The servers were as interesting as the clientele, executing dance-like twists and turns before placing the food on the table. And the food was exquisite—a move away from artichokes to everything truffle.

  At the end of the meal, about ten servers arrived with drinks, sparklers, and confetti, clapping, singing, and dancing to help celebrate Jasmine’s birthday. The sparklers highlighted the wonder and excitement in Jasmine’s eyes.

  It felt like we partied all night, though it was only a couple of hours. All the activity was beginning to catch up to me.

  We took our driver’s suggestion and spent our last day in Paris in the historic Le Marais. We walked along the cobblestone streets visiting small boutiques, galleries, and cafés.

  “I haven’t understood a single word here,” Jasmine said. “I thought knowing German and Spanish would help. Now I want to learn French.”

  Before departing Le Marais for the hotel, we were pulled into a gorgeous, two-story lifestyle store. As I looked at the eco-friendly products they had on display, my work mind started whirring. I desperately wanted my own brand that promoted sustainable products. As I wandered throughout the store, I knew I was on the right track—that the move toward sustainable products was not only already happening but also in demand. I’d been pushing for change, both in reducing our company’s carbon footprint through the production of sustainable products and in improving the work environment for all company employees. Now I was more inspired than ever to keep pushing for change.

  Chapter 14

  I booked an event for Jay and his friends to see the magician Dynamo for his birthday. I was intrigued by how fast Dynamo had risen to the top of his field. During his show he played a video of a glimpse of his childhood. The video was sad but inspiring. He’d grown up in an unstable family. His father had been in and out of prison throughout his childhood. And he was bullied as a child because he suffered from Crohn’s disease, just like I had when I was young. Lonely, he’d found hope in magic—something his grandfather had taught him—and it had changed his life. He’d used it at school to appear bigger so kids wouldn’t pick on him.

  “If you put your mind to something, you can actually see the future,” he told the kids.

  I was mesmerized by Dynamo. I felt an immediate connection with him. What he said resonated with me. I’d used this ability to see the future in my career in fashion. I knew I could see the future simply by daring to imagine it. Now I needed to do the same for my healing. I’d overcome Crohn’s, like Dynamo had. I knew I could not only fully recover from my brain hemorrhage but also thrive.

  March 2, 2018 – Me almost three years after the incident

  August 19, 2016 – My fortieth birthday party, with Jasmine and Jay

  March 11, 2016 – Me and Gino de Campo Chef

  August 4, 2015 – Me and Deepak at Cowarth Park

  October 31, 2015 – Cycling

  April 13, 2016 – Me and Leena

  My sister and best friend, Rajni Dev

  March 17, 2016: Anniversary photo with my work team

  June 11, 2016 – Lake Garda trip

  July 29, 2016 – Fortieth birthday celebration with my work team

  December 2015 – Hale & Bowdon magazine article

  June 8, 2016 – Me and Amanda, sustainable range build

  April 13, 2016 – Leena in the cave; Ambleside Lake District

  December 15, 2015 – Welcome back posters from my work team

  PJ and Duncan, Ant & Dec

  Morphos butterflies at home

  August 19, 2016 – Horse and carriage with Jay

  August 19, 2016 – Me, Deepak, Jasmine, and Jay

  August 19, 2016 – Amrik and Lachoo Basi

  August 19, 2016 – Family pic; fortieth birthday at Soho Farmhouse

  August 19, 2016 – Friends pic; fortieth birthday at Soho Farmhou
se

  August 19, 2016 – Sanj, Jen, and Manpriya

  August 19, 2016 – Superhero capes!

  Jasmine, Sheetal, Jay, Amrik, and Kiran at my fortieth birthday party

  August 19, 2016 – Jasmine singing with Salut Band at Soho Farmhouse

  August 19, 2016 – Me taking over!

  July 1, 2017 – Color Run 5k

  January 12, 2018 – BBC Manchester Radio Show; selfie with Mike Sweeney

  April 10, 2018, Jay’s ISFA football team

  April 11, 2016 – BBC Asia network radio interview

  March 25, 2016 – Unity Radio interview

  March 18, 2016 – Me and Jasmine at the Eiffel Tower

  May 16, 2016 – My vision board

  December 6, 2015 – Khyle and Jasmine at our Christmas party

  March 19, 2016 – Lunch at Hotel Costes, Paris

  “If you want to do something, you can make it happen,” Dynamo said.

  I believed it.

  When I got home I thought about what Dynamo said and decided I needed to up my game—more specifically, my health plan. I wanted to reinvest in my yoga, train for a race, and finally get those six-pack abs I’d been wanting for so long.

  I did a search on the web and found a company called The Well Connected Group—Nikki Hewiston that organized retreats around the country, focusing on yoga as well as healthy eating, outdoor activities, and meeting new people. I called my friend Leena and told her about the retreat.

  “Will you go with me?” I asked.

  When she said yes, I booked it. I was sure a yoga retreat was the perfect thing to help me focus on my goals—help me see my future. I know happiness comes to those who take care of themselves, and that this, in turn, translates to the people in their lives and around them. Happiness is the key to a better quality of life, and my family and I deserved happiness after all we’d been through. I wanted to use the time at the retreat to reflect on what I wanted to achieve in my life with work, my children, my relationship with Deepak, my personal goals, and more.

  I had spent a lot of time away from my family in the past due to work. Work had been my priority. I’d done anything that was required of me, and it wasn’t even my own business. When I had my children, I was back at work after three weeks. I thought this was normal. I missed a lot of seeing my children grow up. Now choosing to be away from my family felt like a new experience. I was anxious about spending four days away from them, but I hoped the reward of coming back rejuvenated would be worth it.

  Leena picked me up in the morning and we began the two-hour journey to Ambleside in the Lake District. Driving through the countryside was mesmerizing. It felt as though the retreat had already begun as we drove through the rolling hills and mountainous regions of the National Park, famous for its association with Wordsworth and other Lake Poets and writers. To the north of the Roman fort of Galava, Ambleside was a well-known base for hiking and mountaineering in the area.

  We arrived at the Brimstone Hotel, a modern, country-style boutique hotel with sixteen rooms, surrounded by its very own lake and forest and nestled in a prime spot of the Langdale Valley. The hotel was booked solely for the yoga retreat. Teachers from all over the world would be presenting on the balance of body, mind, and spirit. There were twenty-one people booked for the retreat, a mixture of chefs, working parents, retired couples, and TV celebrities, and our itinerary was going to be filled with yoga, meditation, trekking, and other exercise.

  As we checked in I worried about my ability to keep up with everyone, but just arriving I knew this was going to be a great experience. We were asked to remove our shoes in the hotel and walk barefoot or use complementary slippers when indoors. They provided Wellington boots and rain gear for our outdoor activities. Our room was luxurious, with a wall of windows that looked out over the trees and had a private balcony. There was a log in the fireplace and a bathtub in the bedroom situated beneath the flat screen TV on the wall.

  “This is amazing,” I said to Leena.

  She grinned and held up a piece of paper. “Here’s our itinerary.”

  “Ooh! Let’s have a look.”

  Also on our beds were bags filled with goodies: cosmetics, snacks, clothing, a mixture of simple grains, and breakfast cereals.

  I was in heaven. I knew this was going to be a great experience for me.

  We headed downstairs to mix with other members of the retreat who had arrived. Their meeting room was cozy, with a log in the fireplace and fresh juices, healthy snacks, and dairy-free chocolate on the table. As I looked around the room and at the spread in front of me, I thought about my yoga teacher, Ana, who had gotten me to this point of recovery, as well as my earlier journey with yoga, which started in my twenties.

  When I was twenty-one, I’d been having a number of digestive issues and was very ill. I was vomiting frequently and had constant diarrhea. I had lost one stone in weight and the doctors didn’t know what was wrong with me. I was treated for arthritis, which made my symptoms flare up even more. I was treated with massive amounts of steroids to control the pain and inflammation, as well as fourteen tablets a day of a drug called Salazophirine. My face became swollen and huge—an effect called “moon face”—from being on steroids until my body got used to them.

  After being in the hospital for six weeks and losing more weight, I was finally diagnosed with Crohn’s disease, a chronic inflammatory bowel disease that was rare, relatively unheard-of, and difficult to diagnose.

  When I regained my strength, I knew I needed to make lifestyle changes to overcome the disease. I began to eat healthy and exercise. I was able to reduce my medication and began to look more normal. Along the way, I learned that meat stayed in the body for three days and was difficult for the body to digest, so I decided to give up eating meat as well.

  A few years later, I began my journey with yoga. I was dropping Jasmine off at Brownies at the local community center on a Saturday, and I saw a flyer for a yoga class and took down the details. My constant travel and busy life thwarted my ability to take the class at the scheduled time, but I contacted the teacher and asked if she would be able to do private classes in my home. She agreed.

  Very soon, yoga began to change me on so many different levels. I was mentally clearer and became stronger. My breathing was better; my sleep and posture improved. My hormones even felt more balanced.

  I was sure my choice to become healthy when I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease—through diet, yoga, and exercise—was what helped me to survive my brain hemorrhage. And I was now convinced that more intense focus on the same would help me fully recover.

  We had an easy start to our retreat that evening: just one meditative yoga session. Since dinner was first, we went to dinner in our slippers and yoga attire. This reminded me of work and my push to create a sustainable line of dual-purpose clothing.

  After dinner we entered the yoga studio, which smelled of incense and was filled with tea lights in the shape of a heart. Both of these touches reminded me of India. A few flower petals surrounded each yoga mat.

  Once we were seated on our mats, our yoga teacher, Annie Clarke, asked us to think about why we were there.

  I thought about my original intentions for the retreat, and asked myself some questions: Do I enjoy what I’m doing? Do I want to continue down this career path? Do I want to make changes?

  These weren’t uncommon things for me to think about, but as I sat back and reflected on what I was doing, I felt I had a better sense of the answers.

  “You should be proud for taking the time out to take care of yourselves,” Annie said. “It’s important to do things for yourself, because so many of us are always doing for others.”

  I was calm. I didn’t need to be anywhere but where I was. As we chanted during the meditation portion, I just let the chanting take me away. And I was grateful I was experiencing this with Leena. Being able to open up and be honest with one another was making our friendship even more intimate. My experience in the past year
had taught me that I needed to surround myself with people who cared about me and also cared about positivity. I knew having constructive people around me was crucial.

  We were introduced to an alternative breakfast the next morning. “Tofu scramble” was the substitute for eggs. And it was delicious! The “eggs” were served with gluten-free bread, and we had almond milk as a substitute for cow’s milk. I loved these new additions to my diet.

  After breakfast we ventured out as a group on a hike, escorted by a gentleman from a local hiking company. After a couple miles of rocky paths, climbing over walls, and picking our way through rough terrain, we arrived at a cave.

  The cave was pitch black inside.

  “Are we going in there?” I asked, a bit apprehensive.

  “Yes,” he said.

  The cave began as a tunnel. We walked through that until the space opened out into a huge cavern that reminded me of Batman’s cave. I hadn’t seen anything like this place in the UK before. The sheer size was overwhelming.

  After exploring the cave, we continued along the trail. Though I felt like I was the slowest and was more tired than the others, I made it to the top of the mountain. And when we reached the top, I took time to look at the expansive view in front of me. I was reminded of rappelling (abseiling) down Table Top Mountain in South Africa—one of the biggest accomplishments of my life. Climbing this mountain was right up there as one of my biggest accomplishments. This was the most exercise I’d done since before my illness. I was so proud of myself for making it to the top, and also for trying different foods at the retreat and listening to how others had changed their lifestyles. I was soaking up as much as I could to continue to heal and improve my life and health.