by Isobel Bird
“I’m just glad you’re not ang— What did you say?” Cooper asked, shocked.
“I said I was surprised,” T.J. repeated. “I’d been trying to think of a way I could do it first. But you beat me to it.”
“Oh,” Cooper said, dumbfounded. “You mean you wanted me to do it?”
“The thought had crossed my mind,” T.J. said. “Is that okay?”
“Yeah,” answered Cooper. “I mean, sure. If that’s what you want.”
“Then I guess it’s okay with you if we do it again sometime,” said T.J.
Cooper was speechless. Was T.J. telling her that he wanted to go out with her? Of course he is, you idiot, she berated herself. She had to think about that for a minute. Her and T.J. A couple. The idea was strange, but it made her excited as well.
“You still there?” she heard him ask.
“Yeah,” Cooper said. “I just spaced for a minute there. So let me get this straight—are we going out here?”
“I don’t know,” T.J. replied. “I mean, we’ve only had one date, and you pulled a Cinderella at the end of it. I think we need to have another one and see how it goes.”
“Thursday night was a date?” said Cooper.
T.J. sighed. “Well, I guess not since you didn’t seem to know it was.”
Cooper laughed, feeling like an idiot. “I’m sorry,” she said. “It’s just that it didn’t occur to me. I’m not really all that good at this kind of thing.”
“Well, you seem to have the kissing thing down okay,” T.J. told her. “At least that’s how it seems from the little bit of it I’ve experienced.”
Cooper knew she was blushing, something she never did. What was it about T.J. that disarmed her so much? She’d never known a guy like him before. Usually, she could cut guys down with one comment. But he was the one putting her on the defensive. Not in a bad way, but in a way that made her feel like she was finally talking to someone who could keep up with her.
“Maybe we should try this whole first date thing again,” Cooper suggested. “What are you up to today?”
“I was going to suggest we go for a sail,” T.J. told her.
“A sail?” said Cooper. “As in on a boat?”
“That’s it,” T.J. said. “Are you up for it?”
“You have a boat?” Cooper asked.
“Wait until you see it,” answered T.J. “You’ll love it. Meet me at the wharf at eleven, okay?”
“Okay,” Cooper said. “I’ll see you then.”
She hung up and sat in her bed, thinking. She had a boyfriend. Well, a sort-of boyfriend. She’d never had one before. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel now that she and T.J. were apparently an item. What did girls with boyfriends do? She thought about Kate and Tyler, holding hands during class and making eyes at one another. Would she have to do that? I can’t, she told herself. It would be too much.
Suddenly, she missed Annie and Kate. If they were around she could talk to them about all of this. As much as she teased Kate about being too into boys, Cooper had always secretly admired the fact that Kate could handle the whole dating thing with relative ease. She would know just what to do. But you basically just told her you couldn’t be friends with her, she reminded herself. So it looks like you’re on your own.
She got up and went to the bathroom to shower. When she was done she dressed and went downstairs to the kitchen, where her mother was just finishing her second cup of coffee and starting to look at least partially coherent.
“Morning, honey,” her mother said sleepily.
“Good morning,” Cooper answered. She poured herself a big glass of grapefruit juice and sat down across from her mother.
“Um, can I ask you something?” she began nervously.
“As long as it doesn’t involve me having to think or do math, then yes,” said Mrs. Rivers.
“Why does anyone date?” said Cooper.
Her mother sighed. “Is this a trick question?” she asked.
Cooper shook her head. “No,” she said. “I’m serious. What’s the point of dating people, at least when you’re in high school? It’s not like you’re really going to marry that person, right? You’re both going to go on to college and change and then probably break up. So if it’s doomed from the beginning, what’s the point?”
“Did your father put you up to this?” asked her mother. “It’s the sort of thing he would ask.”
“I’m serious,” said Cooper. “Why date anyone when you know it isn’t going to go anywhere?”
“For the practice, I guess,” answered Mrs. Rivers. When she saw her daughter giving her a stern look, she continued. “I’m serious. You date when you’re young because it teaches you how to be in a relationship. I agree with you that it isn’t easy. But it’s what we do. If everyone waited until the last second and just got married, we’d make a mess of it.”
“Most people seem to anyway,” suggested Cooper.
“Well, yes,” agreed her mother. “A lot of them do. But my point is that if you date when you’re, well, your age, then you get a lot of those mistakes out of the way early on.”
Suddenly, she stopped talking and eyed her daughter in a different way. “Why are you asking me this?”
Cooper took a long drink of juice. “No reason,” she said innocently. “I was just thinking about it.”
“Give me a break,” said Mrs. Rivers. “I haven’t been married to one of the best lawyers in Beecher Falls for twenty years for nothing. I know when someone’s trying to pull one over on me, Cooper Rivers, and that’s what you’re trying to do. Spill it.”
Cooper groaned. She and her mother had never been the kind to have heart-to-heart talks like other mothers and daughters seemed to. In fact, they seemed to disagree about almost everything. But her mother had her, and Cooper knew she couldn’t bluff her way out of it this time.
“There’s just this guy,” she said.
“Not that tall redheaded boy with the thing in his nose?” her mother said.
Cooper rolled her eyes. “His name is T.J.”
“T.J.,” her mother said, as if trying out how it sounded. “So it is him?”
“Yes,” Cooper said. “I guess we’re kind of dating. I mean, we’re going to. We apparently had a date the other night when we went to the concert, but I didn’t know it.”
Her mother smiled. “You’re so like your father it isn’t funny. He didn’t know we were on a date the first time either.”
“Really?” said Cooper. “You mean I’m not the only one who’s dating challenged?”
Mrs. Rivers shook her head. “It wasn’t until our third date that he realized what was going on,” she said. “He thought the first two were just study sessions for our sophomore philosophy class. I had to tell him that I wasn’t even in the same class that he was and that I’d borrowed the books from my roommate.”
“Even I’m not that bad,” Cooper remarked.
“So, tell me more about this guy,” her mother said. “What’s he like?”
“Can we talk about it later?” Cooper asked. “I’m supposed to meet him soon for our first official date.”
“Fine,” said Mrs. Rivers. “But I want all the details when you get back.”
“I’ll keep notes,” Cooper joked, getting up and putting her glass in the sink.
Half an hour later she got off the bus at the wharf. T.J. was standing there, waiting for her.
“So where’s this boat?” Cooper asked.
T.J. pointed to the end of the dock. “Right there,” he said.
Cooper looked. “But that’s the whale watch tour boat,” she said.
“I didn’t say it was my boat,” said T.J. “I just said it was a boat.”
Cooper punched him playfully in the arm. “You are such a freak,” she said.
“What? You don’t like whales?” said T.J.
“I’ve actually never seen one,” Cooper said.
“Then let’s go look for some,” suggested T.J. “The next tour
starts in twenty minutes.”
They went and purchased tickets, then boarded the boat. They found seats on the top deck, in a secluded corner where they could look out over the railing. As the boat pulled away from the dock and headed out into the open water, Cooper felt herself relaxing.
“I do this about once a month,” T.J. told her.
“Really?” said Cooper. “Do you like whales that much?”
T.J. laughed. “It’s a couple of hours that I can be alone,” he said. “And it’s so beautiful out here. Sometimes I forget how pretty Beecher Falls is.”
Cooper gazed out over the gently rolling water. To one side she could see the shoreline with its beaches and the mountains in the distance. It really was gorgeous.
“This feels kind of weird,” T.J. said.
“What does?” asked Cooper.
“Being here with you,” he explained.
“Thanks a lot,” she exclaimed.
“I didn’t mean it that way,” T.J. said. “I mean, up until now we’ve just been friends, you know? I’m not exactly sure what we’re supposed to do now.”
“I know what you mean,” agreed Cooper. “It’s a little awkward.”
“Maybe we need to do something to get over it,” suggested T.J.
“Like what?” asked Cooper. “Sign a contract or carve our initials into this bench or something?”
“I was thinking more along the lines of this,” said T.J. as he leaned over and kissed her.
This time Cooper didn’t pull away. Instead, she slid her arm around T.J.’s waist and held on to him, kissing him back. She felt the warmth of his skin against hers, and the pressure of his mouth where it touched her lips. She could tell that he was nervous, too, and that made her like him even more.
When they finally pulled apart, she said, “I know that helped me a lot. How about you?”
“I think I’m over it, too,” he said. “This transition from friend to boyfriend might not be as hard as I thought.”
They sat, holding hands and watching the surface of the ocean as the boat moved gently through the water. The July afternoon was hot, and Cooper soaked up the sun’s warmth eagerly. It felt good to be away from solid ground, surrounded by the ocean. Even though there were other people onboard, she felt as if she and T.J. were on their own floating island.
“Look,” said T.J., suddenly leaping up and going to the railing.
Cooper followed him, looking where he was pointing. As she did she saw the surface of the water break and a huge dark shape rise from it. It was a whale. Its black skin was covered with large patches of barnacles, and the surface of it shimmered wetly in the sun. Then another, smaller whale appeared next to the first. They arced gently up, their noses reaching toward the sky, and dove back down. As they disappeared below the surface, their tails rose up behind them, dripping water, before sinking slowly beneath the waves.
“They were beautiful,” Cooper said. “I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“Every time I see one I feel that way,” T.J. said, putting his arm around her.
They stood there, watching as the ripples caused by the whales’ diving spread out, mingling with the wake of the boat. Having T.J.’s arm around her felt good, and as Cooper leaned into him she thought, Maybe there’s a point to this dating business after all.
CHAPTER 10
Annie’s bedroom was filled with the smell of the flowers in the garden below her window. There was a gentle breeze stirring the curtains, and they fluttered lazily as the wind carried the scent of lavender and roses into the room. The moon, only a few days past new, was a sliver in the sky outside. In the yard below them Kate saw fireflies flickering softly as they flew among the trees.
“I just love this room,” Kate said. “It’s the perfect place for working magic.”
Annie, who was busily arranging white votive candles into a circle in the middle of the floor, laughed. “Don’t forget that the first spells I did here were utter failures,” she said.
“That was a long time ago,” Kate replied.
“Not all that long,” objected Annie. “We’ve just gotten better at it.”
She stood back and admired her handiwork. She was getting a lot better at making the circle look right. In the beginning her circles had always been a little lopsided. But this one was a nice full moon shape, and she nodded approvingly.
“Are you ready to start?” she asked Kate.
Kate nodded. She walked over and picked up the backpack she’d brought with her. “I’ve got everything in here,” she said, placing the bag in the center of the circle of lit candles.
“I almost forgot the cauldron,” Annie said, going to her desk and fetching the large iron pot that sat beside it. She’d bought the cauldron as a special present to herself, and she was really pleased with how witchy it looked sitting in the sacred circle. “Are you going to tell me what we’re doing with it?”
“Not until we’ve cast,” said Kate.
Annie sighed. Kate had been very mysterious about what kind of ritual she’d come up with for them to do. Annie had asked her numerous questions but she hadn’t offered up any information. All she would tell her was that they needed the cauldron.
“Shall we get started, then?” Annie asked.
Kate nodded. The two of them stood side by side at the edge of the circle. They were both wearing white robes, and their feet were bare. Annie raised her hands and began the familiar rite of casting the circle.
“East,” she said. “Creature of air. We ask you into our circle to bless us with your gift of creativity.”
They turned as Kate spoke the next invocation. “South, creature of fire, we ask you into our circle to bless us with your gift of determination,” she said.
There was another turn and then Annie continued with, “West, creature of water, we ask you into our circle to bless us with your gift of change.”
Kate finished summoning the directions by facing the north, lifting her hands with the palms out and intoning, “North, creature of earth, we ask you into our circle to bless us with your gift of protection.”
“By the powers of earth, water, fire, and air, the circle is cast,” the two girls said, stepping into the circle.
“I’d like to invoke one of the goddesses,” Kate told Annie, who nodded in assent.
Kate lifted her hands up once more. “Athena,” she called out. “Goddess of wisdom and healing. I ask that you join us in this sacred circle and lend to us your gifts of healing.” We need all the help we can get, she added to herself, hoping that some of the skills Athena was known for would add themselves to the ritual they were about to do.
When she finished she knelt, as did Annie. The cauldron was between them on the floor, and they were surrounded by the flickering light of the candles. Annie watched as Kate opened her backpack and began to remove a series of objects.
“I really wish Cooper was here,” Kate said. “It feels weird without her.”
It was the first ritual they’d done without their friend. Annie had also been disappointed that Cooper had refused to participate. But she knew that they couldn’t let that distract them.
“You can’t think about that,” she told Kate. “This isn’t about her. It’s about us and the magic we’re going to do. If you think about her you won’t be able to focus your intention properly.”
“I know,” Kate said. “But I still wish she was here.”
Annie looked at the things Kate had brought with her. There was a glass jar filled with water, several bags of what looked like herbs, and what looked like a ball of soap.
“What is all of this stuff?” she asked.
Kate held up the jar. “This is water from the ocean,” Kate said. “Seawater is supposed to be really good for doing magic. And these are different herbs,” she continued, indicating the little bags. “Sage, lavender, milk thistle, vervain, and lemon balm.”
“And we’re doing what with it?” queried Annie.
Kate unscrewed the top
from the jar of seawater and poured it into the cauldron, where it splashed merrily as it filled the vessel about halfway. Then she opened the packet of milk thistle and sprinkled it in. “We’re making a bath,” she told Annie as she added the lemon balm to the concoction.
Annie helped her put the remaining herbs into the water. Then Kate pushed back her sleeves. “Now help me mix it up,” she said.
The two of them put their hands into the water and started stirring. Their fingers touched as they swirled the water around.
“As we mix it up, think about pulling white light up from the earth and letting it run out through your fingers,” Kate instructed.
Annie had used the white light meditation many times, and had no problem imagining the light filling her body and moving out through the ends of her fingers and into the water. She pictured the cauldron filling with the light, and watched as it swirled around in bright circles.
“The idea is to turn the cauldron into a healing bath,” Kate said. “All of these herbs are supposed to promote healing in the body. I looked them up in one of the books I’ve been reading.”
After a few minutes of stirring, Kate took her hands from the water and picked up the ball of soap.
“Now what?” asked Annie. “We wash our hands with that?”
Kate shook her head. “This represents Aunt Netty’s cancer,” she said. “We’re going to bathe it in the water. As we do, we imagine the cancer getting smaller and smaller, just like the soap will.”
“I get it,” Annie said. “Sympathetic magic. Sort of like the time you put a spell on that doll that looked like Scott.”
“I thought we weren’t going to dwell on anything negative,” Kate said, giving Annie a withering look.
“Sorry,” Annie said sheepishly as Kate put the ball into the water.
Kate took a deep breath and began rubbing the soap with her fingers. “Try to picture the cancer shrinking,” she said as she passed the soap into Annie’s hands.
Annie ran her fingers over the slippery surface of the ball, working the seawater and the herbs into it. She imagined the healing light inside the cauldron surrounding it and eating away at it. As the lather foamed around her hands she imagined the cancer becoming smaller and smaller.
