Kat flopped on the bed, ran her hands over her heated body and relaxed. She rolled over. “God, I miss sex with a real live man.” The cell phone rang next to her. She moaned and picked up the jigging device with an unsteady hand, knowing full well who was on the other end.
She pulled the comforter up to her chin and cleared her throat. “Hey, Patty.”
“I just got my box from Passion Parties,” Patricia’s excited voice sounded through the phone.
She snuggled back against the soft pillow. “Well, you and Ron will have a good time tonight. I’m a bit jealous.”
Patricia giggled and sighed. “Did you get your order today?”
The comforter slid and exposed a ripe, plump breast. She grinned and sat up. “Yes, and like a kid coming home from the toy store, I had to play with my new toy. I want to thank you for introducing me to my new B.O.B.”
“What about the phone conference and paperwork you had to do today?”
“The conference has been moved to later this afternoon and the paperwork will still be there tonight.” Kat heard a lawnmower start outside. Shit, that was close. I forgot J.J. was coming today. She really needed to start writing stuff like this down. Excitement fluttered in her belly and filled her sated body with renewed need.
“Kat, are you still there?”
“Yes, sorry. The landscaper’s here.”
“How’s the sexy owner of Elite Lawns today?”
She wished she knew. “How am I supposed to know and why do you care? You’re a married woman.”
“Yeah, but there’s something about a tall, built man. Don’t you think?”
Embarrassment ran over Kat. “Yes, but he’s very young.”
“So what. He’s twenty-five. That’s legal.”
“Patty, be real.”
“Oh for God’s sake, Kat. You and Gary had a sexless marriage, and besides, he’s been dead for six months. It’s about time you got back on the horse. Go for it.”
Kat groaned and flipped the now stifling comforter off her tingling skin. Cool air washed over her, doing nothing to calm her growing anxiety. She and her best friend had been having this same conversation for months now. She stood and fumbled through her clothes. “I don’t know.”
“Why? Gary died fucking his secretary. It’s time you do something for yourself.”
The pain and embarrassment still cut deep. “Patty, I don’t want to talk about this now.”
“Kat, you haven’t had sex with a warm body in over eleven years. Just do it.”
Kat swallowed back her tears, adjusted the phone, found her pants and wiggled into them. “I’ve got to go, Sam will be home soon.”
“I think it’s time you were happy. I miss the Kat I grew up with.”
“I’m too old to make mud pies.”
“Maybe, but you’re not too old to be happy. You’re only thirty-five.”
The sadness she felt threatened to bring Kat to her knees. “How did I let this become my life? The highlight of my week is sex with my new vibrator.”
“I don’t know, honey. I have been asking you that for years.”
A baseball-sized lump formed in Kat’s throat “I love you, Patty.” She hung up the phone. Tears stung and spilled down her cheeks. “What did I do to my life?” Kat let her self-pity overtake her. She cried for what seemed like hours for all she’d lost.
The doorbell rang. “Crap.” All I need is to have some solicitor see me like this. She grabbed a tissue on her way to the door, dabbed at her face and took a shallow breath.
Kat glanced at herself in the homely, contemporary-style mirror over the entryway table, rose on her tiptoes and peered through the peephole. “Just my luck.” She smoothed her shirt, ran her hands down her hips, pasted a smile on her face and opened the door. “Hi, J.J. Do I owe you a check?”
“No.” His voice sounded hoarse.
She flipped her mid-length locks over her shoulder, trying to feign nonchalance, and stepped aside. “Please come in.” Her damp hands twisted the tissue. Little white bits rained down on the cold beige tile floor.
He eyed her. “Have you been crying?”
Embarrassment heated Kat’s face. “I, um.”
He stepped closer and shoved his hands into his jeans pockets. “Is there anything I can do to help? Is it your husband?”
An image of J.J. bending her over the ugly sofa and driving himself into her entered Kat’s mind. She shook her head. “No.”
“Do I smell cookies?” he asked.
Kat balled the tissue and pulled herself together. He is just being friendly. “I made them for Sam this morning. Would you like some?” she said.
His smoky gray eyes twinkled. “I’d love some.”
A butterfly army attacked her stomach. “Come on into the kitchen.”
She walked through the archway into the massive kitchen. Kat made her way around the dull space and opened a cabinet door. She slid the trashcan out and threw away the mangled tissue and washed her hands.
Kat dried them on the bright red towel hanging off the cabinet, leaned over the black granite counter and slid a cow cookie jar toward her. She lifted the lid, a mooing sound resonating through the space, and reached overhead. She pulled down a small Fiestaware plate, placed two cookies and a napkin on it and handed them to J.J.
Their fingers brushed, sparks of electricity snapping between them. “Thanks. Are you having any?” he asked.
Kat thought about the size of her butt. “No. I’m on a diet.”
“Why? You don’t need to be on a diet. You’re so fucking sexy!” Heat flooded his face. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
Passion engulfed Kat, her eyes stung and filled. “I’m glad you did. You’re sweet for saying so.” Even if he didn’t mean it, it felt good to hear him say so.
J.J. leaned in. “Just what every guy wants to hear.”
Kat willed herself not to act on the sexual tension arcing between them. Besides, she was sure it was one-sided. The front door flung open. “Mom,” Sam yelled. “Mom. Mom.”
Relief and disappointment swamped her. “I’m in the kitchen,” she said, and leaned away. Kat watched frustration cool J.J.’s sexy features.
Sam bounced into the room, excited. “Cookies! Hi, Mr. Adams.”
“Hey, Sam. How’s middle school treating you?” J.J. asked the boy.
Kat pushed a plate in front of Sam.
“Thanks.” He picked up a cookie and bit in. “Middle school is great.”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Kat scolded.
Sam swallowed. “Sorry.” He grinned. “You’re the best mom ever!”
Kat ruffled Sam’s hair. “Charm is not a replacement for poor manners.”
J.J. pushed himself off the stool. “I best get back to work.”
What a sight he made. Fresh need swelled in her belly. “I’ll walk you out.”
She led him through the dreary dining and family rooms. Perspiration trickled down her back. She tried to shove her hands in her pockets. Her palms slipped over her hips. Damn yoga pants.
J.J. stopped by the door and placed his hand on the doorknob. “Thanks for the cookies.” He twisted the knob and yanked it open.
The desire to kiss J.J. and taste him on her lips had her toes curling against the cold tile floor. “You’re welcome.” She leaned in, kissed J.J. softly on the cheek and pushed him out the open door, then pulled it shut. She rested her head against the heavy door. The feel of the solid wood against Kat’s back calmed her frazzled nerves. She hadn’t felt this giddy and out of sorts in years. Too bad it can’t go anywhere. She heaved herself off the door and sauntered back to the kitchen.
Sam sat at the breakfast nook finishing his cookies. “Mom, do you think Dad was mad at me before he died?”
Kat’s smile vanished. She squatted in front of her precious son and looked him straight in his blue eyes. The innocence in their watery depths reminded her how young he still was. She did what the child therapist had told her
to do. “You did nothing for Dad to be mad at you for.”
It was times like this Kat wished Sam were small enough to pick up and hold. She pulled him into her arms instead. “Oh baby, Daddy was never angry with you.”
“I miss him.”
Kat’s heart broke as she wrapped herself around him and hugged him tight. “I know.”
His arms snaked around her waist. “Will you leave me too?”
She hoped Gary would rot in hell for what he had put their son through. “Never!” Kat ached with his pain. “I love you, Sam.”
“Love you too, Mom.”
She ran her hand over his golden hair. “Why don’t you get your homework out of your backpack, and when you’re finished, I’ll take you to Pop’s Pizza for dinner.”
He jerked out of her arms and bounced on the balls of his feet. “Can we go to the arcade first?”
Love for him filled her. “Absolutely.”
Sam rushed out of the kitchen to find his homework.
How time flies. Just yesterday, I was changing his diapers. Now I’m helping him with pre-algebra.
“Mom?”
Kat shook herself. “Um, sorry. I was just thinking about how big you’re getting.”
“I’m almost as tall as you.” Sam opened his backpack, took out a workbook and sat back in his seat. “But that’s not saying too much, since you’re so short.”
“I’m not short, I’m vertically challenged,” Kat said and sat.
Chapter Three
Kat took a seat at her kitchen table, and gazed out the window at the stunning array of colors. The beautiful flowers, new shrubs and decorative trees reminded her of a Monet.
Patricia slid into the chair across from her. “Your yard has never looked better.”
“It’s how I always imagined it, but Gary had more minimalistic tastes.”
“Too bad he didn’t have a more minimalistic taste in women.”
The old familiar ache in her chest reared its ugly head. She had known for a long time that Gary didn’t love her, but all the women he had been with hurt her pride.
“Look at how high your shrubs are.” Patty’s voice broke into her thoughts. “You can sunbathe nude in your backyard now.”
Kat flicked the sun prism Sam bought her last summer. The pretty colors the heart created did a dance on the wall. “Yeah, right. With my luck, someone will show up.”
Patricia shrugged. “How did J.J. know what you wanted in the backyard?”
“I told him what I had in mind and he ran with it.” Kat examined the kitchen. The beige walls and tile floor begged for color and warmth. “It’s time to start on the inside.”
“Maybe decorating the house the way you want it will help with healing you on the inside.”
Patty always had a way of reading her, she knew Kat better than anyone else. “Maybe,” she agreed.
By improving her home, she hoped to regain her self-esteem and life. Kat had spent too many years letting Gary have all the control. She hated herself for giving him so much power.
“Have you decided on a paint color for this kitchen?” Patricia asked.
Kat blinked and smiled at her friend. “Yeah, you know that yellow we saw in that paint magazine.”
“Goldie Locks?”
She nodded. “I had to special order it. I’m going to pick it up later this week, along with the paint for all the other rooms.”
“That color was my favorite.” Patricia’s gaze followed the prism flecks on the wall. When do you want Ron and me here to help?”
“I hoped we could do it next weekend. Do you think Ron has any crews available?”
Patricia smiled and grabbed her hand. “For you, he’d pull his people off a job.”
If there was such a thing as an ideal man, it was Ron. He was perfect for Patricia. “I should have grabbed your husband when I had the chance.”
“I ‘m so grateful you didn’t.”
“Watch out, I’m single again.” She tossed Patricia a cheeky grin. “Do you think we could be like those women you hear about, who all are married to the same man?”
Patricia tossed back her honey-brown ponytail. “Yeah, as long as I’m the only one having sex with him.”
Kat pulled her hand back and grinned. “Forget it. I’m not getting married again unless there’s sex. Your husband has been fulfilling all my other husbandly needs for years.”
A smile crossed Patricia’s lovely face. “Husbandly needs?”
“You know, all the stuff a husband is supposed to do, like fix the toilet when Sam went through his flush whatever he could find down the toilet phase.” Kat looked around the kitchen. “And paint my house. That’s stuff a husband should do.
“Ron says that he got a two-for-one deal with us.” Patricia glanced around the room again. “So how come we can’t paint this weekend?”
Her gaze followed Patricia’s. “I have work to catch up on for the mill and I’m getting estimates for new floors this weekend.”
“Okay. Ron and I will help you get this house to where you always wanted it to be.” Patricia leaned back in her chair. “I don’t know why you didn’t do it before.”
“You know with Gary it was easier to keep the peace than to take a stand.” She stood and made her way to the fridge. “What’s done is done. All I can do is move forward.”
Patricia came up next to Kat and tugged her into a warm hug. “I know.”
“I don’t know what I would have done without you guys over the years.” Kat leaned away. “I arranged to move my grandmother’s antiques out of storage.” She swiped at the tears filling her eyes.
Patricia grabbed her shoulders and shook. “No more crying for that bastard. Gary did you a favor when he died.”
“You’re horrible.” Kat couldn’t stop her lips from twitching into a small smile.
“I know,” Patricia snickered. “What’s Sam doing this weekend?”
The tightness in Kat’s chest started to loosen. “He’s going to a friend’s house Saturday morning and having a sleepover here Saturday night.” Kat opened the refrigerator door. “Do you want something to drink?”
“Do you have lemonade?”
“No, but I can make some.”
“So, tell me.” Patricia reached around her and grabbed a few lemons. “Why did you call me at the crack of dawn this morning?”
It was time to come clean about her sex-filled dreams. Kat opened a kitchen cabinet. “I think I’m going to have to get a new landscape company.”
“Why?”
“Because every night J.J. and I are stars in my fantasy porn movie. How can I have a professional relationship with someone I want to jump? The other day I all but humped J.J. in my driveway.”
“I said it before and I’ll say it again.” Patricia sighed. “Go for it. Screw his brains out.”
“I can’t.” Frustration filled her. “He’s too young. I can’t put myself out there like that.”
“Ten years is not that big of a deal.”
“It is when you’re me.” She took down the lemon juicer. “I can’t give someone his age, or my own age, for that matter, a future.”
Patricia’s elbow nudged her ribs. “We’re not talking about a future, we’re talking about breaking the celibacy phase of your life. Besides, you can’t fire him, we just had a whole conversation about what a great job he is doing.”
“I know. But—”
“Just have a fling.” Patricia sliced into a lemon. The smell of citrus filled the air.
Kat teared up again. Twelve years of being with Gary weighed on her. “Look at me! Who would want me?”
“You’re beautiful.” Patricia handed her the sliced lemon and cut into another.
She shoved the lemon into the juicer. “I’m too old for him.”
“You’re not too old for him. Why can’t you try to be happy?”
“I’m trying!” She pushed more fruit into the machine.
“Try harder.” Patricia had to yell over the whirr of
the juicer. “I have a feeling he has a thing for you.”
Kat rolled her eyes and tamped down the hope welling up inside her heart. “No, he doesn’t.”
“I have eyes. I see how he looks at you, and every time I talk to him about my yard, he seems to ask about you.”
“What, with pity?” Kat murmured.
Patricia elbowed her again. “No, you ninny, with lust.” She stirred the lemonade. “He doesn’t do anyone else’s yard. He has crews for that, you know.”
“I know. Maybe he doesn’t have enough help.” She grabbed glasses out of the overhead cabinet and started for the back door. “Let’s go outside.”
The two women strolled out the glass French doors and sat at the antique wrought iron table.
“That’s bullshit and you know it.” Patricia set down the tray. “That man has got it bad for you.” She pulled out a chair and sat.
A truck door slammed and a swarm of butterflies attacked Kat’s stomach. “That sounds like a work truck.”
“Is J.J. scheduled today?” Patricia asked.
Mortification rushed through her. “Yes, I totally forgot it’s Tuesday.” She took the chair across from Patty. “I can’t believe it has been a week.”
Patricia winked. “This is going to be fun. Act natural.”
“Yeah, easy for you to say. You don’t have sex dreams about him.”
Patricia glanced over her shoulder. “Shh. He’s coming!”
She told herself to relax and searched her brain for a change of subject. Kat said the only thing that came to her mind. “I got a call from my mother. She wants Sam and me to come up to Maine for Thanksgiving and she wants Sam to stay for the month while he’s out of school.”
“How do you feel about that?”
Kat sat back and tried to relax. “I don’t know. Sam and I haven’t spent more than a day apart since Gary died.”
A throat cleared behind Kat. “Sorry to interrupt. I’ll start in the front today.”
“Hi, J.J., join us,” Patricia said.
“No, I couldn’t.”
Heat flooded her insides and her pussy clenched. She lifted her glass, took a sip and hoped the refreshing liquid would ease the effect J.J. had on her libido. She forced herself to turn and gazed over her shoulder.
Just Sex Page 2
