In W1, Penelope’s night out had just begun…
‘Penelope, you look lovely my dear.’ Gordon took her coat, he sounded like a granddad! He kind of looked a bit like one too, with his receding hairline!
‘Thanks Gordon, lovely restaurant. They all seem to know you here, do you eat here a lot?’ Penelope was struggling to make conversation, there was definitely no spark here and she hated small talk.
‘We take clients here a lot actually, usually during the week of course. So what area of finance are you in exactly?’ Gordon could not believe that she had agreed to go on a date with him, he could see all eyes in the room on the two of them.
‘I specialise in Capital Markets.’ The conversation was dragging on..
‘Excellent, so do I, at least now we have something to talk about.’ Gordon was thrilled to have some kind of common ground to talk about!
‘Oh my god, is this guy for real, talking shop on a Saturday night, there must be a hidden camera in here somewhere, this must be a joke, I must be on TV.’ Penelope tried to hide her disappointment.
‘Indeed,’ she said through gritted teeth.
‘I want to go home, I want to go home, I want to go home … now! But we haven’t even ordered yet. Why did I agree to this, what was I thinking?! I’d much rather be at home alone than be here. I might go to the loo and text George to call me and rescue me, brilliant idea… ok I’ll wait and order first, I don’t want it to look too obvious.’ Penelope hatched a plan to escape this rather unfortunate situation.
‘How is your personal portfolio looking these days, we all took such a hammering with the tech stocks, none of us saw the dotcom bubble bursting. I mean personally I am risk averse, so I didn’t invest too much but many of the others lost a lot of money in that market…’ Gordon droned on and on, and on… about the aftermath of the dotcom implosion. It seemed to have been the most exciting thing that had ever happened to him.
‘Right that’s it! I’m out of here… I can’t believe he’s still talking about the dotcom implosion, oh my god!’ Penelope had had enough. She didn’t have a portfolio of tech stocks, much happier to invest in shoes and expensive handbags.
‘Excuse me, I’ll be back in a moment.’ Penelope smiled sweetly as she said this, and she slid out of her chair and headed towards the bathroom.
‘Of course.’ Gordon stood up as he said this.
‘Ok George, I’m counting on you now…’ Penelope thought as she started frantically texting her best friend George.
Hi Doll, date from
hell, need help, pls
call with emergency in
5 mins, if not never
spking 2 u again, P xx
‘Read Receipt! Yes she’s got it… .now, back to face the music.’ A sense of calm descended on Penelope as she was sure that George would bail her out.
‘Sorry about that.’ Penelope’s smile was genuine, because she knew that this ordeal was not going to last too much longer.
‘Not at all, dear, not at all. I took the liberty of ordering you a glass of champagne.’ Gordon was delighted with himself, he felt like James Bond, for the first time in his life. He beamed at Penelope as he said this.
‘Oh thank you very much, have you decided what you are going to eat?’ Penelope relaxed a bit now, because she knew that she had an escape route.
‘Oh, I always go for the same thing.’ Gordon smiled smugly.
‘Oh what a surprise!’ Penelope was not one bit surprised, this was the kind of guy who ironed his socks and ate peas one by one… Penelope was counting the seconds!
‘Really? I think I will go for the monkfish, no starter for me… oh, hold on a moment, I’m getting a call through and I had better take it. Excuse me again.’ Penelope tried to act surprised that she was getting a call..
‘Penelope Chesterfield,’ she barked into the phone.
‘Hi, it’s me… so what’s the story, is he hideous?’ George was in hysterics at the other end of the phone, she was picturing Penelope sitting at the table with a bald version of the Incredible Hulk sitting opposite her!
‘Aunt Agatha, is everything alright, you sound manic?!’ Penelope adopted a very concerned tone.
‘Oh my god, he is that bad then?! I’m sorry I just can’t stop laughing…’ George could barely get the words out she was laughing so much.
‘Stop crying now, I can’t make out a word you are saying.’ Penelope improvised, just in case Gordon could hear any of the conversation.
‘Pen stop it! That mock serious voice is nearly convincing me that there is something wrong with me!’ George tried to compose herself, she could barely breathe because she was laughing so much.
‘I see, I see, calm down, I am actually with someone at the moment, but I’m sure he will not mind if I slip away a bit early.’ Penelope knew that she was out of there within minutes!
‘Do you want to drop over on your way home?’ George had managed to stop laughing now, and was planning their girly night in. She scraped her long brown mass of curls into a messy bun, and debated whether to change out of her track suit and put on a bit of make-up.
‘Yes. Have you phoned the police?’ Penelope was managing the two conversations at the same time… getting the message across to George, while still seeming to be speaking to her elderly aunt.
‘And you’ll bring some wine?’ George enquired.
‘Yes, yes of course. Alright I will be there as soon as I can.’ ‘Wine! Of course… good idea.’ Penelope thought to herself, and was already planning where the cab should stop on the way to George’s.
‘I am terribly sorry about this Gordon, but my aunt is quite old and her house was broken into earlier. She tried to phone my parents of course, but I think they are at the theatre tonight, and the police still haven’t arrived even though she called them an hour ago. She is terrified. I’m afraid I am going to have to go, I’m so terribly sorry. I hope both of our hectic schedules leave us some window where we can meet up again.’ Penelope feigned regret.
‘Yes, of course, you must go. Do you need me to give you a lift?’ Gordon jumped out of his seat.
‘No!!’ Penelope answered a bit too quickly, ‘I mean, that is very kind of you, but that won’t be necessary, I will get a taxi from outside, there is a long queue of them. I’ll just run and grab my coat. Goodbye now, and thanks again.’ And without a backward glance… she was gone.
Gordon sat back down, and picked up his glass of pinot noir. ‘I knew it was too good to be true’ He thought to himself, as he relished the last few drops of his wine.
Penelope dialled George’s number as soon as she was safely installed in her cab.
‘George, hi it’s me, thanks you are an angel, I have finally escaped! He wasn’t ugly, it was just that he was so boring! All he could talk about was work, what a nightmare! George! Will you stop laughing for two seconds!’ Penelope chatted animatedly on the phone to George, she was elated to have not wasted the whole evening.
‘I can’t help it, you were so funny, you should have been an actress, I had visions of you sitting there in pearls and a Jackie O suit on an old fashioned telephone that they had brought to you on a silver tray, with your handbag on your lap and a hankie and smelling salts in one hand… just in case… I presume he believed you, I bloody well did!’ George couldn’t believe all of this drama, she had written off any kind of fun in exchange for a night in front of the TV. This was quite a turn of events.
‘Yes he did, I feel a bit bad, but there was no point in wasting both of our nights… and his money, we had nothing in common. I would much rather have been at home having a nice bath.’ Penelope tried to rationalise the whole experience.
‘Bloody hell, that bad?’ George couldn’t believe it!
‘A total waste of makeup! How come you are in anyway?’ Penelope was so relieved that George was at home tonight, otherwise she would have been stuck with Gordon for the entire evening!
‘My love is at a stag night tonight, so I decided to stay
in in front of the TV,’ George sighed longingly.
‘Thank god you did! I’ll be there in fifteen.’ Penelope sped towards George’s flat in a cab.
‘See you soon babes.’ George couldn’t wait to hear the full story about the date from hell…
***
In SW4 Zara was still struggling with her first Saturday night in London. She was not used to being so isolated, she was used to having all of her friends living within walking distance from her house. Every Saturday night without fail, boyfriend, or no boyfriend, all of Zara’s friends would meet up in one of their houses, to either get ready to go out or to have a girlie night in. The lack of company was killing Zara, it was a cocktail of emotions in terms of the euphoria of living in London, and the frustration of not having anyone to enjoy it with. At this point Zara had no way of telling that this feeling would not be with her for too long. Zara paced up and down in her bedroom…
‘This is the longest night of my entire life. I had my bath, and only used up twenty minutes. I tidied my room, again! There is practically nothing in it, so that didn’t use up much time either. There is nothing on TV, and I don’t even know where the nearest video shop is… I must go and try to find it tomorrow, I’m not about to start wandering around looking for it in the dark. At least I had the Chinese takeaway menus, not great for the figure though. I think I will go to bed and read a bit of my book, I feel like a middle-aged housewife, I just want to go home. I would give anything to be out with the girls at home now, I hate London!’ Zara lay down on her bed and cried until she couldn’t cry anymore..
The next morning, Zara woke up very early, as the sun streamed in through the gap between the curtains in her bedroom. For a moment she had no idea where on earth she was. For a moment of innocent bliss, she felt like she was still living her old life, but gradually she realised that she was in her new home in London…
‘8 am! Bloody brilliant, I’m wide awake now, I don’t think I have ever been up this early on a Sunday since I was a little girl. Now I have the whole bloody day ahead of me, with nothing to do. I wonder if the other two are going to be in at all today. Probably not, Sunday is a real family dinner day… oh god, this is grim. I was so bored last night I thought I was going to die of boredom, a full day and night ahead of me, I don’t know how I’m going to cope. Thank god for Sunday morning hangover tv, just another hour or so to wait! I’ll eat my breakfast v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y.’ Zara tried to cope with being up so early. She padded down to the kitchen and made her breakfast very slowly. It seemed like her first Sunday in London was going to be the longest day of her entire life. There wasn’t a single sound outside on Abbeville Road, such a stark contrast to the night before. No doubt all of the other urbanites were sound asleep nursing the mild repercussions of the fun that a typical Saturday night in SW4 entails.
Chapter 6
Spaghetti Junction
The only good thing about having woken up so early on Sunday morning was the fact that Zara was nice and tired and ready for bed by 10 pm that Sunday evening, and she knew she had a very early start on Monday morning. She was so nervous about her first day at work. It was her first real, full-time job. She left the house extra early to make sure that she made it in on time… she wasn’t too sure how to get there from Clapham.
Nothing could have prepared her for what lay ahead. Zara thought that an hour was more than enough time to get to work, she had no idea that thousands of other Clapham-ites would be thinking exactly the same thing. Zara got the bus from the end of Abbeville Road to Clapham Junction train station. Zara could cope with buses and trains, but the Tube… she did not like the idea of that so much. As Zara sat on the bus taking everything in, the schoolkids, the young professionals, everything so vibrant and colourful… she began worrying about getting to work.
‘I knew I should have come in yesterday… on a practice run. At least I have made it to the train station… I was too scared to get the Tube, and I don’t really know where the nearest Tube station is to the house!’ Zara arrived at Clapham Junction, and she was beginning to wish that she had got the dreaded Tube… ‘Oh my god! Which platform is my train going from? There are about a million people here and they are all on a mission to get to work. They all seem to know exactly where they are going too, and they are all walking so fast… I wish I was in that position. If one more person pushes me I’m going to start crying! At least I’m nice and early… I would hate to be late on my first day… how embarrassing. This looks like the right one now, I’ll hop onto this train. It says it goes to Charing Cross and I can walk from there, this A to Z is like my lifeline, it was one of the best going away presents I got… I’m only realising that now. I laughed when Sally gave it to me, and I didn’t believe that it would become one of my most valuable possessions in London. I have no idea how long this train is going to take, I just hopped on and hoped for the best. It’s so packed, I don’t think I have ever been this close to this many people, it’s weird… it doesn’t really seem to bother anyone. I’ll just have to pretend that it doesn’t really bother me either. I’m glad I brought my book with me, that’ll take my mind off it.’
Zara settled into her seat on the train, she was so relieved to be out of the warpath of all of the commuters rushing around, she was not used to walking so fast, and she had to keep jumping out of people’s way. Just when she thought she was well on her way, the inevitable happened. The train suddenly lurched to a standstill, and the driver made a muffled announcement to the commuters. ‘Oh no! Why are we stopping? That’s not good!… What is he saying I can’t make it out at all, something about a delay? Great this is exactly what I need. I hope it’s not for too long, I really don’t want to be late.’
Zara felt a pit of panic grow in her stomach, she could not believe that this was happening. She could not understand why none of the other passengers seemed too concerned, surely this couldn’t be “normal” could it? It seemed like the train stood still for an eternity… but eventually… it started moving again, but very, very slowly. Zara was sure she was going to be late. At this stage the other passengers were starting to get agitated. Zara’s mind was racing ahead…
‘I’m going to have to run up to St Martin’s Lane, I really hope it’s not far… I haven’t really figured out how to tell yet by looking at the A to Z. Oh my god! We have stopped again, what the hell is going on? I have to be in by 9 am, and it’s 8.45 am now! I wanted to be in early today to make a good impression. Ok, we are moving again, I think I’m going to have to run when I get to Charing Cross. That guy is totally staring at me, what should I do? I’ll just ignore it. It’s really making me feel uncomfortable…’ Zara reached for her book and started to look engrossed so as not to catch the eye of the dodgy guy who was staring at her. In reality she could not even see the lines of text in the paragraphs in front of her. It was all a blur.
‘Finally we have arrived.’ Zara was getting really nervous, when finally… the train arrived at Charing Cross. There was a total stampede for the doors, it was the last stop, so everyone was getting off. Zara got pushed to one side, costing her another three minutes. When she finally got out on to Charing Cross Road, it was 8.52 am. Eight minutes to get to work! The only thing to do was run!
Zara arrived at her new office, pink and flustered.
‘Finally 8.59 am! I can’t believe I made it. It looks good, quite trendy. I hope I’m not underdressed. I have to start taking my career seriously now that I work in London! No more slacking off in front of daytime tv, dodging lectures and handing in projects five seconds before the deadline… god I miss Uni already!’
Zara made her way through to reception, trying to compose herself.
‘Hi, I’m Zara Stephens, I’m here to see Victoria.’ Zara tried to look confident when she approached the receptionist. She was in reality bright red from running all the way from Charing Cross. Zara was feeling a bit overwhelmed by the whole experience.
‘Oh hello Zara, Victoria is waiting for you, take the lift to t
he second floor.’
The receptionist seemed kind, but also a bit bemused by the sight of Zara all pink and flustered. Zara made her way up to the second floor, and there was just enough time to comb her hair in the lift.
‘Hello Zara, come on in, I’m Victoria, it’s very nice to meet you, take a seat. I’ll just go through your role and responsibilities with you again, and then I’ll take you out to meet the rest of the team’. Victoria was so glamorous and very formal, Zara was getting a bit tired of everyone, except her, being so gorgeous in London! This was her first official visit to the London office, although she had been there once before for her final interview. It seemed so different now from the inside. She had a nice desk, next to a window beside a girl called Sophie. Victoria introduced Zara to everyone, and instructed Sophie to answer any of Zara’s questions.
At the end of her first day in Organicom, Zara was beginning to think that time passed very, very slowly in London indeed, this Monday had been the second longest day of her life. Zara had a lot to think about on her journey home, luckily this time there were no delays. First of all, she was finding it really hard to remember everyone’s name in work, there were just so many people. There were people from all over the world working in Organicom, and many of them had names that Zara had never even dreamt of. Where Zara came from, well… everyone was from where Zara came from. They did not get much in the way of international visitors in her home town…
‘That was the longest day of my entire life, I am never going to remember all of their names. There is such a variety of characters at work from what I can see. They all seem to be really friendly. It’s weird being the new girl. For some reason I was expecting them all to be Londoners, but I don’t think there is anyone who is originally from London working there, they are from all over the world. Loads of Australians and South Africans I wasn’t expecting that,’ Zara thought to herself on the train on the way to Clapham Junction.
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