Chapter 11
Becca
Angela and I were out at the mall with the boys. Angela had a couple returns to make, of Christmas presents that didn’t fit or weren’t needed, and she had talked me into coming out with her to get my mind off things, and to give the boys some fun before school started back up next week.
Currently, the boys were visible, but playing in the Electronics department where two big screens were set up in front of an Xbox and Play Station, with the newest, trendy games on display. There was a single teenager enjoying the Play Station, but David and Mark were watching the two pre-teen boys playing the Xbox.
The graphics were incredible, but the game was obviously rather violent, with the avatars using guns and swords to kill and decapitate zombies. Even the blood looked real. More real than some bad horror movies I watched growing up.
While I watched the screen distractedly and thought about pulling Mark away, while knowing that he probably played much worse himself when he was over at Donna’s house, I listened to Angela lecture me on the importance of communication.
“Didn’t you just spend almost a decade not talking to Neil due to some miscommunication? Are you really going to just give him up again without even knowing why? What is wrong with you?”
Angela may have been being harsh, but she right, of course. And I needed some of her tough love right about now, even though I hated to admit it.
“I just don’t know if I have it in me to put myself out there and get hurt,” I confessed. “It hurt enough losing James. Maybe I didn’t love him, but I had to watch Mark lose his father.”
“Yeah, but Neil is the one though, Bec. Neil is the one,” she repeated, as if for emphasis. “I can tell. You might as well have his name tattooed on your forehead. And it was the same for him. Even in the Santa suit, I saw it in his eyes. The impact seeing you had on him.”
“You know, Ang. It’s because of you that I even know of his rep, and all the drinking. The women.”
“I told you. That doesn’t have to mean a thing. People do crazy things when they’re lost, and nothing holds their interest. What if Neil pined for you in high school and never recovered? I would never suggest any woman stay with a cheater, but there is no evidence of behavior like that. Neil has never been with anyone in a serious relationship to step out on that I know of. Even this high school girlfriend you mentioned…”
“Cindy.”
“From what you told me, he didn’t even ask you out until they had broken up. So, are you going to judge him for trying to fill a hole with alcohol and parties, when there was nothing stopping him? Surely, you didn’t expect him to be a monk over the past nine years or so just for the sake of your memory. A girl he never even kissed. When you certainly weren’t a nun yourself, getting married and having a kid during that time.”
Damn, Angela had to be the voice of reason every time.
“You’re right,” I told her. “Now I just have to figure out what to do about it.”
“Now you’re talking,” she said with a satisfied grin.
I got home with Mark later and let him play his new video game. It wasn’t the zombie-killing game, and instead was something tamer, which was all I allowed him to play at home, but he was just as happy.
I picked up the phone and listened to my voicemails for the first time since Christmas. I had several from Neil, asking me to call him, let him help, at least give him a chance. I could hear the pain and confusion in his voice and felt bad.
There were a few hateful messages from Donna saying that we needed to talk immediately about my “lifestyle” and its influence on Mark, and that she wouldn’t tolerate watching her grandson raised by a woman like me.
I didn’t know what I expected from her after two days, but it wasn’t that. I was still so pissed at her that I would enjoy nothing more than having it out with her.
How dare she talk to me like that? And to suggest anything untoward when prior to Christmas I had only ever been with James. I spent one perfect evening with my high school crush, the one man I had ever felt anything for at all, and she just had to go ballistic on me.
Well, I saw her true colors and was done with her. I deleted her messages because I owed her nothing.
The last message was from a local reporter asking that I call him back regarding a story he was writing on the Leviathans’ Tight End Neil Bowman. I wrote down the number.
Then I looked at the call history and saw that both Neil and Donna had called many times— more frequently than the messages they left suggested. I decided I was not having it out with Donna over the phone when Mark was in the house.
The more I thought about it, I didn’t even want to talk to her at all and let her get me all wound up. I decided to text her instead.
You are Mark’s grandma and that is all. I will not speak to you when you are like this, and I owe you no explanations.
You are welcome to see Mark as long as you learn to control your anger and not say disparaging things about me, his mother.
At this time, you can text me a date and time when you next want to see Mark, and I will respond. I can send him out when you arrive, and vice versa. Just like we did last time. That is how this is going to go from now on.
When Mark had last gone over there, things had been so strained between Donna and me that that was how we had handled the situation. And I was beginning to see it was the best way forward, if she was going to continue to act so badly towards me.
I doubted that this would go over well, but this was me being more decent than I felt like being. If she had really messed with Neil’s livelihood, someone she had never met before Christmas, that was kind of unforgiveable.
I was hesitant to take any more people away from Mark after he had already lost his dad. But I would not be disrespected. Angela was right. And this was the best way I could think of to still have him see her without having to subject myself to her abuse.
For whatever reason, I was still avoiding calling Neil. I looked at the reporter’s number and called that instead.
“Hello, this is Becca,” I said, once he’d answered.
“Is this Rebecca Bell?”
“Becca, please. Yes.”
“Ms. Bell. I understand that was your house in a video clip of Neil Bowman showing up as Santa.”
“Yes. I saw that.” I took a deep breath and then continued. “It is my house, yes.”
I hated to further expose myself and wanted to remain anonymous and have my privacy. But more than that, I wanted to set the record straight. It was time I showed Neil I was serious about wanting to be with him, after so long spent not trusting him for no good reason.
“Can I ask what the nature of your relationship with Mr. Bowman is?
“We were classmates growing up. He came over as Santa for the benefit of my son.”
“A woman has claimed you and Mr. Bowman are in an intimate relationship, and there are pictures proving he was over for much longer on Christmas Day than it would take to simply drop off some gifts. Is that an accurate characterization of the length of his visit?”
I didn’t know what to say.
My mind raced.
Were there pictures?
What pictures could Donna have?
She did have her cell phone in her hand when she was at the door, but I’m sure I would have noticed if she was taking pictures with it. I definitely didn’t want to say anything that would make Neil to come off poorly.
“Of course Neil was here for awhile on Christmas,” I admitted, switching tactics. “In fact, Neil and I are in love. We’re engaged. The woman is my son’s grandma, and she is very bitter. You should really vet your sources.”
“You are engaged to Neil Bowman?” He didn’t seem convinced.
“That is what I said. I have no further comment.”
As I said that, I realized that “no comment” is what people always say when they don’t want to talk.
W
hy the hell didn’t I just say that to begin with?
But I knew the answer. I was doing whatever possible to help Neil, because he had helped me realize what true love and trust were all about.
Except now I worried that I had gone and messed things up more for him in my attempt to help him.
Was saying we were engaged a good or bad thing for his reputation?
I thought good but I didn’t understand the world of sports PR enough to know for sure.
I would just have to hope that he would know my intentions were in the right place.
Because I missed his kiss, his touch, his smile… everything about him.
I needed to see him again and to know that he was mine, for real, for always.
Chapter 12
Neil
Becca finally called me, and I was excited about that, despite being upset that she had ignored all my calls for so long.
I wouldn’t put up with that from just anyone. But I knew I had caused a dramatic situation for her and I was trying to be understanding. I wanted one more chance for us to work out, and letting her talk was the only way for that to happen.
But the problem was that she was talking so fast that I could hardly follow what she was saying.
“Becca. What? I’m sorry. Did you say a reporter called you?”
“Neil. I’m trying to tell you. I told him we were engaged to get him off your back with these horrible stories. I think Donna is his source. You can just tell them in a couple of weeks that we broke up or however you want to sell it. I thought this was better than admitting we hooked up and make it look like another one-night stand. Supposedly there are pictures.”
“Becca. How can you say that? You were not anything like a one-night stand, and what could there possibly be pictures of?”
God, I hate the press.
“Look, I don’t want to do this over the phone,” I told her. “We need to make sure to get this right once and for all.”
“Get what right?” she asked, and I knew she was wondering if I was referring to the details of our coverup story.
“You and me,” I told her. “Our relationship. Or, at least, what I would like to be our relationship, if you’d like that too. I’m coming over right now. Is that okay? I can be there within the hour.”
“Yes Neil. I would like that. For you to come over, and for us to have a relationship. I’d like to get you and me right once and for all.”
I grinned so wide I thought my mouth would crack. Then I hurried to head out the door before Becca could change her mind once again.
When I got there, Becca opened the door before I knocked again, but this time she was happy to see me. We sat on the couch, and she explained what the last few days had been like and how she understood that she had been unfair to me, and that she was trying to understand why so that it didn’t happen again.
“You were right. Why would I listen to Cindy or Donna, over you?” she asked me.
“You were just afraid to go for what you really wanted. But that’s all in the past. By the way, I got some answers about how Cindy might have known about my asking you to Prom,” I said.
And I proceeded to tell her about my high school journal and how my mom had suggested Cindy was in my room alone around the time of the breakup.
“Are you kidding me? You kept a journal? Like a diary?”
“Yes. I know. Not the normal guy thing to do.” I laughed. “But I was interested in journalism in case football didn’t work out. Now that I know they’re all vultures creating drama just for the sake of a story, though, I’m glad I didn’t go into that line of work. I’ve always liked writing, though. It was a nice mental exercise to compliment all the physical exercise I had to do for football.”
“You really aren’t at all who I once thought you were, you know that?” Becca said, sounding surprised still. “I would love to read that myself one day.”
“You know. I don’t even know what ever happened to it. I was so shocked to hear that my mom had read it, that I completely forgot to ask her if she knows its current whereabouts. My mom could sell it for a fortune. Can you imagine what these reporters would pay for that?”
We laughed about the reporters and Becca was so mad for getting fooled by one.
“So, you told them we were engaged?”
“I did. Are you mad?”
“No, except for the little fact that I wanted to be the one to ask you that myself.”
Becca looked puzzled. I pulled out the ring box from my pocket and got on the floor and down on one knee.
“Becca Bell, I love you. Will you make me happy not just on Christmas but forever, and marry me?”
Becca looked completely stunned. She looked down at the ring.
“When in the last few days, did you have time to buy a ring? Never mind think I might say yes, given how I’ve been treating you? Which, I admit, wasn’t very nice. And again, I’m so sorry about that.”
It was not the way I envisioned her answer going when I asked her to marry me, but I went with it, determined not to let anything distract me from my path this time.
“I didn’t buy it. It is a family heirloom, generations old. My father proposed to my mother with this ring, and they loved each other very much,” I told her.
My mom had called me last night and told me where the ring was and had me get it to give to Becca. It was almost like she knew before I did that I might need it before she returned to town.
“I’ve talked more to my mom in the last few days, while she’s been island-hopping in the West Indies, than I ever do while she is here just a few miles away,” I added.
Becca laughed, a bit uncomfortably.
“Neil. You don’t have to propose because of the story I told him. It will pass. We don’t have to make it seem this realistic.”
“I don’t think I was clear, Becca. I want to marry you because I love you. I’m madly in love with you and have been since high school. I couldn’t even think straight when you were around, and that hasn’t changed.
“I don’t want to wait a minute more to start our lives together. I’d also like to make an honest woman out of you for the benefit of Donna and the reporters. I want to adopt Mark if you’ll let me. There is nothing about the way I feel about you that you should ever feel ashamed of. Please, say you’ll marry me?”
“Of course, Neil. Of course, I’ll marry you. I love you too. So much.”
I got up off the floor and we held each other. I hadn’t held her these last few days, and it felt so good to be doing it again. And I was so glad that she had said yes. I wouldn’t have to worry anymore about whether we’d work out. It was now set in stone, just like the ring I had just given her.
I looked over her shoulder to where Mark had apparently been listening. He came out of the hallway with a sheepish smile.
“So, you’re going to be my dad?” he asked.
Oops.
Maybe I could have made sure he wawsn’t here when I proposed, so that Becca could have some one on one time to prepare him for the news. But Becca took this one with ease as we sat down.
“Mark, Neil will never replace your father, but Neil can adopt you if you’re willing. Your grandma might not be too happy, but it doesn’t have to change your relationship with her. She is still your blood. Right now, it’s just something to think about.”
“I’m so glad you’re marrying a player on the Leviathans!” Mark said, surprising us with how well he took the news. “I’m gonna be the coolest kid in school.”
We laughed and he added, “And, Neil, I like you. Thanks for making my mom happy.”
“No problem, little bud,” I told him. “I like you too!”
Mark came and hugged us both, and I couldn’t have been any happier if I tried.
We spent New Year’s Eve together at my place. I had a party and we invited a few of Becca’s coworkers and her friend Angela, while some of my teammates and even coaches were there with
their wives or girlfriends and kids.
It was an interesting mix. The kids were down in my mancave, where all the fun stuff was, including my gaming system, while the adults mingled upstairs, drinking, hopeful for the new year.
I bought ten bottles of Dom just in case. The Leviathans weren’t going to the Super Bowl again this year, but one day I hoped to get my ring. All that mattered, though, was that I already had my prize. I had Becca.
Our friends danced all night long and I made sure to put on some slow songs so that I could hold Becca close in my arms as we swayed back and forth. It was like our own personal Prom, since we had never been able to go to back in high school.
I was certainly making up for last time. And in that sense, it was even better than high school Prom.
Not to mention that after everyone left tonight, we would share my bed, which was something we wouldn’t have been able to do back in high school anyway, due to our rather strict parents.
I was so glad to have her in my arms and not to have wasted another opportunity to be with her. From here on out, we would never spend a night apart, unless I was at an away game that she couldn’t come with me on, due to her work schedule or Mark’s school schedule. That was my promise to her, which I intended to keep.
* * *
On January 2nd, my agent released a statement I had written for the press. In it, I wrote about how I had started the new year with the love of my life, Becca Bell, and her son, and we were to be married on Christmas Day, in front of family and friends, almost a year from now.
I added to the statement how my parents had met in high school and fallen in love, and ultimately built a life together with never a regret for their choice in partner. I told of falling in love with Becca, a clarinet player in the marching band while I played football, back when we were in high school, too, and how I wrote about Becca extensively in high school.
I indicated that we didn’t know yet where we would marry, but the plan was that Mark would play the clarinet at our wedding. I apologized for my past transgressions as I had never really recovered from losing Becca in high school, and I made bad choices, but there would never be another one, now that I was sharing a life with my soul mate.
JK-Super Secret Santa Page 7
