Aengus shrugged. “Because of how you fight. That’s it. You’re fast, clever, and ruthless. We could tell that before you even stabbed me in the neck. And we were right to choose you, because no novice before managed to slaughter the King of Mammon.” Aengus rubbed at his throat, as if remembering the pain I’d caused him. “Anyway, I have to get back to Melusine. Good luck with your magical learning.”
Tendrils of dark magic slid through the air around Ruadan. He stared at me, still sharpening his knife. Aengus wasn’t kidding that his magic was strong. It was coiling over my skin right now, raising my hair and making my back arch. A memory burned in my mind—his hand gripping my hair, his teeth on my throat.
The combination of his knife-sharpening and coils of magic was deeply unsettling. I tried not to think about the fact that he’d snapped the necks of his last two novices. I never wanted to be on his bad side.
Too bad I didn’t have a choice.
Cold dread spread through my veins. When I’d brought up the World Key before, he’d closed off. He didn’t trust me one bit, which was a problem. Ruadan wasn’t going to let down his guard at all around me.
I hugged my side, wincing a little. “Can we get some sleep now? It’s been a long day, and I need this to heal.”
Ruadan frowned, dropping his knife onto the stone table. Then, he rose, crossing to me.
He extended a hand to me, and surprise sparked in my chest. An unexpectedly friendly gesture. I took his hand and rose, and he walked me over to his bed. Then he gestured for me to sit down. I sat on the edge of his bed. The mattress was firm and unforgiving, because it was Ruadan’s, and of course it was.
To my increasing surprise, he knelt before me.
Things did not get any less surprising when he began to pull up my shirt.
“Whoa!” I stopped him, tugging on the hem. “What are you doing?”
He cut me a sharp look. I’d irritated him again. Wasn’t hard to do.
He pulled another small piece of paper and a pencil out of his trousers, and he started writing again. Then, he thrust the paper at me.
You need to heal.
“That’s where sleep comes in.”
He shook his head.
“You have healing powers, I suppose.” Given all the shadows and darkness that whirled around him, it wasn’t surprising. Shadow demons were known for their healing skills. Demons of death, demons of sleep, demons of easing the pain. They were like the opiates of the demon world, addictive and lethal at the same time.
I didn’t want him to see the scars that slashed across my body—my hips, my belly, really every part of me that I’d covered up. Then, I could no longer pass off the lie about the bar fights. Once he saw my scars, he’d know that I’d been a slave, one forced to fight.
If he thought I was ruthless just because I’d stabbed Aengus in the neck, he’d have a whole new definition of the word once he understood I was the Amazon Terror. That I’d slaughtered thousands to survive. Only the most brutal killers survived the arena.
And more—he’d know the worst thing about me: that I was the sort of sloppy, careless person who’d allowed myself to be captured in the first place. That I’d allowed someone to control me for years. Knowledge was power, and I didn’t need Ruadan learning that much about me.
My stomach clenched, and I shook my head. “No,” I said quietly.
I didn’t know why, but I felt tears stinging my eyes as I stood up. For some insane reason, I really wanted his approval. Why? I didn’t even like him, but I already yearned for his respect. Possibly because I knew I’d never get it.
I lay down on the cold stone floor and curled up, ready to sleep. The stone chilled my skin, and I shivered.
Ruadan crossed to his bed, and he blew into the air. Darkness blanketed the room.
As I closed my eyes, loneliness carved through me, so sharp it blocked out the pain of my wounds.
Chapter 17
The next day, The Wraith and I stood at the perimeter of a stone hall. Through thin arrow slits in the walls, light blazed, illuminating Ruadan’s smoky magic. Given our slight communication difficulties, I wasn’t entirely clear what sort of magic we’d be practicing today. I only hoped it didn’t involve memorizing Angelic spells, because that wasn’t my strong suit. And I definitely didn’t want to have shamanic sexual relations with a potted plant, if that was on the agenda.
I dropped my backpack on the floor. I’d brought my whiskey with me just in case I needed a bit of Dutch courage, but I’d try to keep it capped.
Ruadan wasn’t wearing his cloak today—just fitted, dark, woolen clothes that sculpted his body.
As I stood against the wall, he crossed into the center of the room, his back to me. My body tingled, heart racing as his magic thrummed through the room. I breathed in deeply as it pulsed through me in powerful waves.
As he worked his magic, he touched something around his neck. My pulse quickened. Was that the World Key?
I inched closer, silently. And yet even with my stealth, his body tensed. He flung up a hand, a signal to stop me from moving any closer. He still mistrusted me, and I had the disturbing sense that he could always predict my actions.
Frustration rippled through me, and my fingers clenched into fists. I was getting nowhere here. Ruadan had what I needed, but he wasn’t letting me get anywhere near it.
Sometimes, when killing wasn’t the answer, I was all out of ideas. But an impulsive attack wouldn’t get me very far. He was too clever and too powerful to overcome. I needed to earn his trust, even if it killed me.
As shadows lashed the air around him, his powerful magic intensified, stroking my limbs like a brush of velvet. It heated my skin.
For a warrior who hated to enjoy himself, he sure could work a disturbingly pleasurable spell.
I stared as he unlocked a world, and a pool of water formed in the floor. It spiraled larger and larger until it formed a portal, at least six feet across. I backed away from it, suddenly a little nervous. I wasn’t a huge fan of the unexpected unless I had a sword in my hands, and right now I just had my backpack of lollipops and duct tape.
Ruadan gestured for me to move away from the portal, and anticipation hung over the room.
As I took a step back, I stared at Ruadan’s throat, searching for something that looked like a key. I couldn’t see anything—not a necklace, nor a brooch. Where in the seven hells was he hiding it?
A splashing in the water interrupted my thoughts. Then, an enormous man hoisted himself out of the portal. No, not a man—a demon. One with leathery black wings that swooped down his back and tattoos that were whorled over his chiseled body and olive skin.
I wasn’t sure what was more disturbing: the fact that he’d just crawled out of a portal in the stone floor, or the fact that he was stark naked. Like Ruadan, he seemed to think his nudity was unremarkable. He just stood before us with the water from the portal dripping down his powerful body, like not a big deal, just crawled from another realm with my penis on display.
His eyes were deep gray-blue, and I tried to focus on them, even if my gaze kept drifting downward as if of its own accord. It took me a moment to realize he was gripping something in his hand.
And another moment to realize he was just sort of staring at me, his brow furrowed. And that we had been standing like that for an awkwardly long time, part of which had involved me staring at his penis.
I cleared my throat. “I have no idea what I’m supposed to do now.”
For a moment, only the dripping of water filled the silence.
Then, I nodded at Ruadan. “He doesn’t talk. Please tell me that you do, or this will just stay really awkward. I mean, more than it already is.”
“I’m Bael, Sword of Nyxobas of the Shadow Realm. Ruadan never mentioned you were a woman.”
“I am, yes. He didn’t mention that you’d be naked. Mentioning things isn’t really his forte, as it happens.”
Ruadan shot me a sharp look, his violet eyes sparking w
ith silver. He was part shadow demon. Was he related to Bael?
“The Institute never recruited females in the past,” said Bael.
I folded my arms. “Will this be a problem for you?”
“No.” He nodded at Ruadan. “My old friend, here, has asked me to instruct you in our ways.”
“In the ways of the shadow demons?” I bit my lip. “I guess your ways don’t involve trousers.”
“I will not sully the waters of Nyxobas, God of Night.”
Sure, and I guess he doesn’t mind your balls all over the place.
All I knew right now was that the demon standing before me exuded powerful magic that snaked off his body, mingling with Ruadan’s. With the two of them in the same room, the power almost overwhelmed me. On top of that, the room had become freezing with shadow magic, and frost iced the stones.
Given that it was summer, I was wearing nothing but a short dress Ruadan had given me—black, cotton, with frankly more cleavage than I normally showed. But here, in a room suffused with powerful shadow magic, goosebumps rose on my skin, and my teeth began chattering.
I hugged myself. Right now, I was working really hard to keep my gaze on his eyes. “Okay. So what are we doing here?”
“The Institute of the Shadow Fae is tasked with keeping shadow demons in line. They are the fae ambassadors to our demon realm—the shadow realm.”
“Okay, I’m with you. What’s the next trial?”
“First, a little background. Centuries ago,” he continued, “the God of Night exiled the incubi from his realm. All except his son. The God of Night loathes pleasure and the vices of the body, while the incubi feed off pleasure.”
“He sounds like a good time,” I said. “He and Ruadan would have the best parties.”
A heavy hush fell over the room, so heavy I could hear my own heartbeat. Ruadan cut me a death stare, his violet eyes darkening. Clearly, I’d said something wrong.
“Moving swiftly on…” I prompted.
Bael straightened. “The Shadow Fae have been hunting exiled incubi for centuries. The incubi breed heavily, and their numbers keep growing. And now, a nest of incubi have turned up in East London. Your next trial—along with the other novices—will involve hunting the incubi. You need to send them to the shadow hell.”
Hunting. I liked the sound of that. It sounded like I’d be able to use weapons. “And we need magic for that? Why not just use swords? Or arrows? Or broken bottles or whatever?”
Bael stared at me for a moment before answering. “You will use your sword. But the incubi are experts in shadow-leaping. That is the magical skill you must learn.”
Interesting. “What’s that, exactly?”
Instead of answering, Bael disappeared in a blur of dark magic, leaving behind only wisps of dark smoke. It took me a moment to realize that he’d reappeared behind me. Still naked as hell.
“That is shadow-leaping,” he said. “Moving from one shadow to another.”
I’d seen Ruadan do that. I’d never seen anyone in the arena who could shadow-leap. It brought me back to a previous thought that raked at my mind: a warrior who could shadow-leap never would have been enslaved by Baleros. I wanted this skill.
My jaw dropped. “You really think I can learn that?”
He lifted a pendant in his hand—a rock that glowed with stunning violet light. In fact, the color wasn’t altogether different from the violet of Ruadan’s eyes.
Bael handed it to me. “I’ve brought you a lumen crystal from the Shadow Realm. Put it on, and Ruadan will teach you how to absorb the magic so that you can use it to shadow-jump.”
I reached for it, my legs shaking a little. I was torn between the temptation to possess powerful magic and the fear of what would happen if I did.
They didn’t know what I really was….
As soon as I clasped the crystal in my palm, I felt its dark, seductive power thrumming over me. “What does this do?” I asked.
“It charges your body with night magic. You must learn to channel it correctly, let it become one with your body. And once you do, you can leap from one place to another by communing with the darkness of shadows. Ruadan will help you learn to channel the magic effectively. He will need to see how you’re able to handle the magic before you go further. Use the stone in the floor to anchor your feet, so the magic doesn’t overwhelm you.”
“What if….” I sucked in a sharp breath. How did I ask this question? How did I name this fear?
What if a dark, powerful magic infused me? What if there were worse things in the world than incubi?
What if I was one of them?
I cleared my throat, trying again. “What if this magic doesn’t mix well with me? I don’t know what my other half is.” That old lie. Stick as close to the truth as possible. “What if I flip out and just start slaughtering everyone?”
“You won’t.” Bael nodded at Ruadan. “There is no better teacher.”
I frowned, casting a doubtful glance at Ruadan. Like Bael, he had the rigid posture of a warrior. But without speaking, how was he supposed to teach me anything?
Whatever the case, I wasn’t about to argue with the enormous, naked man in front of me. I’d just take his word for it.
Without another word, Bael turned and plunged into the portal.
Ruadan crossed over to the dark whirlpool, shadows intensifying around him. His cool, shadowy magic buzzed over my skin. The smell of burnt air rose in the room, like a thunderstorm after lightning strikes. I stared as the watery portal closed up again, replaced by a simple flagstone floor.
Once again, I’d failed to get a glimpse of the World Key, and my stomach sank.
Ruadan turned back to me, and he pulled the crystal from my hands. Then, he reached behind my neck, his powerful magic caressing my skin from my thighs up to my breasts and raising goosebumps over my arms. He clasped the necklace behind my nape.
As soon as he did, a rush of power flooded me, pooling in my chest and my belly like glacial waters. My back arched, and my mind went dark, until an image arose—
A field of fae corpses lay around me, skin blackening, turning gray….
I gasped at the wave of horror that washed over me.
Powerful hands clasped me by the waist, and the image dissipated. Ruadan had jumped, and he was standing behind me now, his powerful body pressed against mine. I slowed my breath, inhaling deeply. A thin sheen of sweat had bloomed on my skin, and my blood roared in my ears. But my mind was no longer flooded with disturbing memories.
Shadow magic curled from my fingertips. Somehow, with his touch, Ruadan was helping me channel that magic so that it didn’t overwhelm my mind. It was as if his body helped to ground the magic in my mind. Now, with Ruadan’s warm hands on my waist, his fingers over my hips, I could feel the shadow magic pulsing up my legs, skimming over my thighs.
But that disturbing image from the darkest depths of my memory still lingered, and another wave of shadow magic slammed into me.
Chapter 18
My legs trembled. Even with Ruadan’s help, I felt like my body was rejecting the shadow magic. I leaned back against his powerful form, my head tucked under his chin. Still, darkness clouded my mind once more. The next thing I knew, I was walking in those tall grasses, fae blood staining the soil….
Glaciers slid through my bones, wracking me with shivers. I was freezing from the inside out, teeth chattering.
Ruadan’s arms slid tighter around me, encircling my waist. His embrace warmed me, and some of the shivering relented. He dispelled the disturbing memory from my mind.
Why was I thinking about those terrible memories now? I’d worked so hard to forget.
Heat radiated from Ruadan’s powerful body into mine. When another surge of ice flooded my veins, Ruadan’s hands shot up, and he unclasped the crystal from my neck. He stepped in front of me, his brow furrowed.
Tremors wracked me, and I hugged myself. “I know. It’s not working.”
He pulled out a piece of pa
per and wrote on it.
We’re going to start from the bottom up. Use the stone to anchor you.
I frowned. “What?”
He shoved the paper and pencil back into his pocket. Then, he put his hands on my hips and guided me back against a wall, pressing on my shoulders until they were flat against the stone. Warming me with his touch, he cupped my chin. He guided my head back against the wall until my spine lined up completely with the stone. I looked up at him, meeting his violet gaze, breathing in the smell of pine. So easy to get taken in by his stark beauty, so easy to forget what he really was—a cold-blooded killer.
“Why did you slaughter your last two novices?” I asked.
His fingers tensed on my hips, and for just a moment, shadows slid through his eyes until they darkened to pitch. And there was the shadow demon, eyes the color of the darkest hell. Icy dread raked a claw up my spine. That question really pissed him off for some reason.
“Quite handy, isn’t it?” I said. “Only speaking when you want to.”
He seemed to gain some mastery over himself, his eyes shifting back to violet with silver flecks, and his muscles relaxed. I wasn’t going to get an answer. Fine. I needed to remember that even if he was my mentor—and even if his magic felt delicious—I’d never be safe with him.
He grasped my hands in his, then turned my palms to face the wall. I understood the intent—I was supposed to keep as much of my body pressed firmly against the wall as possible, and use the contact with the stone wall to stabilize the magic. I splayed out my fingers over the stone.
Then, with his thumbs pressed into my hips, he straightened the small of my back against the wall. Ruadan’s magic thrummed over my skin. Pressed against the wall, with my head tilted back, I felt strangely vulnerable before him.
Once again, he lifted the necklace. But this time, he clasped it around his own throat. It took me a moment to understand, but he was going to channel the power from his own body into mine, to act as sort of a conduit. That way, he could temper the intense torrent of magic. While I stood, pressed against the wall, he knelt before me.
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