me out the door consisting of Mandie, Dresden, Ronnie, and
Bam.
Although the guys had become my friend too, I knew damn
well they weren’t leaving in support of me. It was because the
alcohol supply had just run out, and Cassidy always had an
ample stash at her place. Not to mention she had an actual house
to hang out in as opposed to a small stuffy apartment like
everyone else.
I continued stomping down the hallway and up to the
elevator. I anxiously punched the elevator button repeatedly as if
that would make it come faster. My face felt like it was on fire
and my heart was racing. I wanted nothing more than to tear the
long tresses out of Bronwyn's head and hang her over the side of
Sebastian’s balcony.
We walked to my dads’ truck, and the girls stuffed
themselves into the front cab with me while the boys piled into
the back of the truck bed. This was long before it was illegal to
have people riding in the back of an open truck cab, or maybe it
wasn’t, and I was just too pissed off to care.
The truck and my emotions were racing down Sunset Blvd
as I erratically drove over various potholes. I heard bodies flying
around in the back cab. I thought it was my crazy driving until I
peeked into my rearview mirror to see Mandie and Dresden
body slamming each other. I rolled my eyes and took a sharp left
onto Gardner, which sent Mandie and Dresden tumbling toward
the right side of the cab. They regained their balance and
continued wrestling.
Kennedy showed up to Cassidy’s house shortly after we
arrived. I sat down at the kitchen table with her and Dizzy as
Cassidy set up another round of Pass Out and handed me a
lemon drop. Dizzy purred out comforting words on how I
deserved to be treated better and that everything would be okay.
It was funny to hear such sweet words from a guy who
completely towered over my tiny frame. I remember staring at
the three tongue piercings he had rattling around in his mouth as
he spoke. I adored him for taking the time to console me, but I didn't need any convincing. When I saw Sebastian walk out of the bathroom with Bronwyn, I knew without a doubt it was over. I think I had come to that conclusion weeks before, I just
didn’t want to admit it to myself.
Sebastian called me a few days later and denied doing
anything in the bathroom with Bronwyn. He said the reason he
didn’t go up to me when I first arrived at his house was because
he felt I walked in there with an attitude. He also said he was
sick of everyone telling him what a great couple we were.
Apparently, everyone was giving him accolades on how cute we
looked together and how much they liked us being a couple. He
said he didn’t want everything to be perfect and cutesy between
us. He found it nauseating. He wanted things to go back to the
way they were when we first met. Before I became tied in with
everyone.
I really didn’t know what to say to him. Obviously things
could never go back to the way they were. I had become friends
with everyone, and I certainly couldn’t ignore people if they
called me or wanted to hang out. Overall, he didn’t apologize for
anything he said or did the night of our fight and ended our call
with an ultimatum.
“I can’t be just ‘friends’ with you because I’ll never
consider you as just a platonic friend. So if we’re not going to be
more than friends, then I can’t talk to you anymore,” he said. “I guess we won’t be talking anymore then,” I said without
hesitation.
Sebastian paused for a moment, then hung up on me.
11
DON’T LET THE DOOR HIT YA WHERE THE GOOD LORD SPLIT YA!
Afew weeks after my blowout with Sebastian, Cassidy decided to throw a party at her house for no other reason than to throw a party.
The first thing that came to mind was Sebastian. I wondered if he and Bronwyn were going to show up. I wasn’t sure how this was going to work, now that his friends were my friends. I couldn’t imagine going out and having to see Sebastian and Bronwyn together on a regular basis. But Cassidy assured me he wouldn’t go the party. She said he had been avoiding the girls like the plague ever since our fight at his place. I had also heard through the grapevine that he and Bronwyn were having quite the tumultuous relationship, which didn’t surprise me. There was one rumor that they ended up brawling on the floor backstage at The Whisky after a Kids show. The physical aspect of it surprised me because he never once laid a finger on me while we were together. Then again, he probably knew better than to pull that bullshit with me. I wasn’t a passive person like Bronwyn was, and there’s no doubt I would’ve knocked his head off. Regardless, I figured that having a turbulent relationship with Bronwyn was what he really wanted after all. I guess the reason things didn’t work out with us is because I was way too normal for him.
CASSIDY: Sebastian and Bronwyn fought ALL the time. I remember she livedinaweird,random home.It was like ahome for girls or another families home and had a curfew of like 11:00pm. That’s why Sebastian could never go over there. They never hung at herplace.Shehada weirdstory,andI don’treallyknowexactlywhat itwas. Shewasjustaweirdchick.
The night of Cassidy’s party, all the regulars showed up including Harley, who I hadn’t seen much of since I stopped dating Sebastian. She wasn’t part of the normal group of girls I hung out with and rarely ever went to Cassidy’s. I didn’t understand why she was there and not off lingering around Sebastian as she always did. Dresden was there too, which surprised me because he and Cassidy had recently stopped dating. But it was nice to know at least someone in our circle was capable of an amicable breakup.
A few hours passed, and I was having drinks in the living room with Dina and Amie. While most of us indulged in hard alcohol, Amie rarely ever did. She was always a beer drinker. Whenever we’d go to parties, she’d always buy herself a case of Lucky Lager bottled beer with the little riddles underneath the bottle caps.
Amie, Dina, and I were riddle solving with a handful of bottle caps when we heard yelling coming from Cassidy’s bedroom. So I got up, made myself a fresh drink, and walked down the hall to see what the fuss was all about.
Kennedy and Lark were sitting on Cassidy’s bed while Cassidy pounded on her bathroom door. I asked Kennedy what was going on, and she said Dresden and Harley were locked in Cassidy’s bathroom. A few moments later, Lark started yelling and pounding on the door too. Considering I had already starred in my own personal spectacle just a few weeks earlier at Sebastian’s, I took myself and my freshly made cocktail back into the living room and resumed riddle solving with Dina and Amie.
A few minutes later, I heard a scuffle in Cassidy’s bedroom, followed by the sounds of Cassidy, Harley, and Lark yelling. This continued down the hallway and into the living room. The next thing I know, Harley is being thrown out the front door like a bag of garbage. Everyone in the living room, including yours truly, jumped out of our seats and looked outside to find Harley lying like road kill, face down in the driveway. She slowly lifted her head, and I noticed she was missing half of her front tooth. Lark immediately slammed the front door, leaving Harley outside.
CASSIDY : The jist was that Harley locked herself in my bathroomwithDresdenandwouldn’tcomeout.Wewereknockingon the door for like twenty minutes and then the frustration just got annoying. I think maybe Vaughn came in and took the door off the hinges?IrememberLarkbeingontop ofherinthehallwaypunching her, like sprawled ou
t over on top of her. Then I remember Harley somehowgetting to thefrontdoor.I threwherout,Larkkickedherin the ass,andshewentflyingacrosstheporch.Ican’trememberifshe chippedher toothonthe groundor if she hit acar that wasparked in the driveway.
If Harley had been bleeding, I would’ve gone outside to help her. But aside from a badly chipped tooth, she seemed to be okay. I know it sounds pretty cold, but I really didn’t feel bad for Harley. After all, she did sleep with Sebastian when she knew we were dating and continued to pursue him the entire time we were together.
As the weeks passed and winter began to set in, the girls proved to be excellent rehabilitation in helping me get over Sebastian. They planned girly, anti boyfriend outings, and we talked about what to do for my 19th birthday, which was rapidly approaching. Although I was feeling better about things, I still wasn’t 100% over Sebastian. I really didn’t feel like having a big blow out party to celebrate my last year of being an official teenager. Cassidy told me not to worry about it and that she would handle the arrangements. But the weeks quickly passed, and before I knew it, the week of my birthday arrived and the girls still hadn’t told me what we were doing to celebrate.
In all honesty, I didn’t really care at that point. I recently got sidetracked because Dizzy had been admitted to Cedars Sinai Hospital just a few days earlier. I asked the girls if they wanted to come with me to visit him, but every single one of them had a different excuse as to why they couldn’t go, which I found weird. The only person who offered to go with me was Joelle, which I also found strange because she barely knew Dizzy. Hell, she barely knew me.
When Joelle and I walked into Dizzy's hospital room, he was sitting up in bed, watching TV in a hospital gown with his hair pulled up in a ponytail on top of his head. I hugged him hello, and he seemed to be in good spirits. He said he was feeling better and asked me what I was doing for my birthday. I told him I wasn’t sure and figured the girls would probably drag me to El Compadre, our favorite Mexican restaurant in Hollywood.
Joelle and I stayed with Dizzy for about an hour or so. As we were about to leave, she told me to stay put. She said she had to make a quick phone call and darted out of the room. Dizzy and I looked at each other and raised an eyebrow. He had a phone in his hospital room, so I didn’t understand why she didn’t use his. Joelle came back to the room a few minutes later. We said our goodbyes to Dizzy and made our way back to the Gardner house.
When Joelle and I got out of her car, I could hear people talking in the living room. That didn’t seem like anything out of the ordinary because that house was always full of people. But when Joelle opened the front door, among all the regulars in the living room were balloons spread out everywhere. Everyone stopped for a minute, looked at me and yelled, "SURPRISE!” I really was surprised because my birthday was still a few days away.
The party had been planned out for the last few weeks right under my nose. Even Dizzy knew about it. Cassidy said the girls had already visited him earlier in the week, and the reason they stayed behind was to decorate the house while I was gone. Joelle admitted the reason she darted out of Dizzy’s hospital room was to use a payphone and give Cassidy a heads up that we were coming back.
I made my way through the living room, getting birthday hugs from various people and walked into the kitchen. I noticed a big bouquet of roses sitting on the kitchen counter right between a bottle of Early Times and a bottle of Jim Beam. There were a dozen red roses, with one peculiar white rose sitting right in the center of the bouquet.
My first thought? They definitely weren’t from Sebastian. He never would’ve done anything that nice for me. If he were ever to send me a bouquet of roses, they’d be dead and painted black.
“Wow these are beautiful. Who sent them?” I asked Cassidy. “I have no clue. I found them sitting on my doorstep earlier this afternoon,” she said.
On the outside of the bouquet, there was an envelope attached with my name badly misspelled. Inside was a note with my name badly misspelled again:
Marrissa, Here are some roses, they come in a few. Here they come in a dozen, but there is only one of you.
- A Secret Admirer
I had a secret admirer? That was a first. My mind went into overdrive, trying to figure out who it could be. I figured anyone that would go to that much trouble would also be someone who would want to be at my birthday party. I scanned the room and took a quick inventory of every guy who was there.
After going through the entire male population at my party, the last group of guys I came across were Mandie, Dresden, and Vaughn, who were having drinks at the kitchen table. The only person I thought it might be was Vaughn because Cassidy had told me not too long ago that he thought I was kind of cute. It wasn’t much to go on, but there really wasn’t anyone else there that fit the bill. Mandie was like my brother, and it sure as hell couldn’t be Dresden because he was still avoiding me like the plague. I didn’t even understand why the hell he was at my party anyway. It’s not like we were even friends.
“Happy Birthday Marisa!” Kennedy yelled as she slid down the hallway.
“About an hour ago,” I said laughing.
“Sorry, I was still getting ready. What music do you want to hear?”
“What do you think?”
“The Beatles coming up!”
I walked into the kitchen to set up a Cassidy style lemon drop when "Help" by The Beatles came on. I loved the back up vocals on that song and always preferred to sing them instead of the lead. As I caterwauled the words to the song, I noticed Dresden singing them too, and he caught me looking at him. We stared at each other for a few moments as we continued to sing and then I looked away. When the song was over, I grabbed my roses off the kitchen counter and carried them into the living room to put them in a vase.
After arranging my roses, I picked up an acoustic guitar that was sitting nearby and sat on the couch. I started playing bits of songs I had learned from my guitar class days in high school when Dresden walked over and sat down next to me.
“What do you want?” I asked.
“Go ahead and play. I'm just going to sit here and listen,” he said.
“I don’t need an audience.”
“Why? You don't know how to play?”
“Are you always this annoying?”
We hazed each other back and forth a few times when suddenly the tone of our cracks got a bit lighter, more playful. We ended up having a fun little chat about how we both loved The Beatles. We also talked about him being from New York and how I've always wanted to go. He didn’t seem like such an asshole after all.
A few days later, on my actual birthday, I went over to Cassidy’s and planned on having a chill night in with the girls. I was sitting on the couch, talking to Kennedy when Cassidy brought in a birthday cake for me. The girls sang happy birthday to me, and I blew out my candles. They immediately took the cake away and said it was time for my gift. Cassidy told me to close my eyes and put my hands by my sides. I told her if she shoved the cake in my face while my eyes were closed I would kill her. She promised she wouldn’t, so I closed my eyes.
I felt something plop onto my lap and start to move around. I freaked out and immediately opened my eyes to see a white and grey rabbit with big floppy ears looking up at me. I grabbed it and hugged it.
“Oh my god, I can't believe you guys got me a bunny! I love him!” I squealed.
“HER you mean. She's a recycled bunny,” Kennedy said.
“A recycled bunny?” I asked.
“Not a recycled bunny, a Recycler bunny as in the newspaper. A married couple put up a listing for her because they’re trying to have kids and the wife is allergic to the bunny. Her name is Bambeloni,” Cassidy explained.
“Bambeloni? I think I’m going to have to change that,” I said.
The bunny hopped off my lap and immediately started investigating the couch.
“I christen thee Sniffy Rabbit!” I proclaimed.
“There's one catch,” Cassidy said. “The
wife was really upset about having to give her away. She wants to speak with you, just to make her feel better and know the bunny is going to a good home.”
So I called the wife and assured her that Sniffy Rabbit was about to live a very charmed life, and she thanked me as she choked over her tears.
CASSIDY: I swear I don’t remember the birthday party at all, (laughs) wowthatwassolongago.I rememberthebunnythough! I had grown up with rabbits since the age of 4. We started off with two, and that changed literally overnight. I’d been telling Cassidy for months that I wanted a rabbit. But the last time I brought up the idea to my mom was when I asked if we could take Faye’s rabbit Chloe, and she said no. My mom was a huge sucker for animals, but she also called them heartbreakers and didn’t want any more pets. So I wasn’t sure how this was going to go over.
Instead of staying at Cassidy’s that night, I decided it was best that I take Sniffy home. I usually slept with Kennedy in Joelle’s room, but Joelle had a small rat dog named Dog Dog, and I had a good feeling that he and Sniffy were not going to get along.
I got home shortly after midnight and closed the door to my bedroom. Sniffy was tucked into a blanket in a cardboard box, but she he kept hopping out. It was the same pattern every few minutes. I’d put her in the box, she’d hop out, and I’d hear the soft pitter pat of her fuzzy paws on my linoleum floors, followed by her chomping on whatever books and magazines that were within biting reach. I was exhausted but realized there was only one bunny proof room in the house we could sleep in until I could set up my bedroom the following day. So I grabbed Sniffy, a sleeping bag with some extra blankets, and we spent the night on the bathroom floor.
After less than a handful of sleep, I snuck Sniffy back into my bedroom in the wee hours of the morning and tried to think of a way to sweet talk my mom into letting me keep her. But by the time I heard the banging of pots and pans in the kitchen as my mom started to make breakfast, I still hadn’t thought of anything clever to tell her. So I picked up Sniffy, charged into the kitchen, and lifted the bunny right up to my moms face.
“I didn’t ask for her. She was a surprise birthday present I swear,” I blurted out. Sniffy let out a sneeze, which caused her big ears to flap. My mom melted into a big pile of goo, and I knew nothing else needed to be said.
Rock and Roll High School: Growing Up in Hollywood During the Decade of Decadence Page 25
