But he couldn’t. This was something he couldn’t run from, even if he believed they’d be better off without him. At the very least, he had to make Blythe understand why he’d left in the first place. If she’d listen, she might decide she didn’t want him to stay. It had to be her decision. He wouldn’t walk out on her and the baby unless he knew it was what she wanted.
When he saw Bree, Jace stood.
“Mom, she wants you and Dad to go back in now.”
Paige and Mark went through the double doors without speaking to Jace, or even acknowledging he was still there.
“This isn’t fair,” he muttered. “Were you able to talk to her?”
“Yes, I talked to her, but I didn’t get anywhere.”
“You know I’m telling the truth. Or is this your way of getting rid of me?”
“How dare you accuse me of anything, especially lying to my sister?”
“Gotta admit, she’ll believe whatever you tell her. You haven’t made your feelings about me a secret.”
“A moment ago, you said something about this not being fair, and right now, you aren’t being fair to me. I’m not a liar, Jace. I may not like you, but I wouldn’t lie to my sister to get rid of you.”
He studied her, trying to figure out whether she was telling him the truth.
“What did she say?”
“Apologize.”
“She said to apologize?”
“No. She didn’t. Before you ask me what she said, you owe me an apology.”
He hesitated, and Bree turned to walk away. “Wait. I’m sorry.”
She turned back and studied him, much in the same way he’d been studying her moments before.
“I’m sorry, okay? I’m on edge. I’m beyond frustrated, but I shouldn’t have accused you of lying.”
“She doesn’t believe me, but I did defend you.”
“What was her response?”
“I told her that I saw it all take place. She asked me if I heard your conversation, and I had to tell her the truth. I didn’t hear it.”
“She believes I knew where Tucker was all along. Why would I have kept that from her? It doesn’t make sense.”
“To win.”
Ah—Blythe believed it was still a game between the three of them. “That’s crazy.”
“I don’t recommend you say that to her if you’re given the opportunity.”
“No. I wouldn’t. But this is life, Bree. We’re talking about a baby’s life. And Blythe’s life. I stepped in because Tucker wasn’t here, because it was the right thing to do, not because I wanted to win a prize. What a low opinion she must have of me to think her life would mean so little.”
Jace sat down and put his head in his hands. He’d done everything he knew to do for Blythe, yet she still believed he’d been lying to her, that it had only been a game.
He knew his feelings mattered little in this scenario, but it didn’t change how hurt he felt. He’d offered Blythe his heart. Whether or not she could return his love, he’d been willing to give her his, and she still thought it was all a game to him. He wondered what that said about the kind of person people believed him to be. He’d spent almost every day of the last couple of months with her, yet she didn’t know him at all.
“I’ll talk to her again. I’ll keep talking to her.”
“Thank you, Bree. I know this isn’t easy for you.”
“It isn’t about me. It’s about her. And Tucker. And you. I’ll tell her I believe you, but even if she accepts it, nothing much changes. With Tucker back in the picture, she won’t need you in the same way. And she wants nothing to do with him either.”
“It’s his baby.”
“She knows that. It doesn’t mean she’ll want him in her life. The baby’s life, maybe. Her life, I don’t know what to think.”
“I’m going back upstairs now,” she told him. “I just came down to tell you what she said.”
“Thanks, Bree. I mean it sincerely.”
She nodded and walked away, leaving Jace feeling as though there was a gaping hole in his chest. Was it because Blythe didn’t believe him, or because he didn’t want Bree to leave?
Blythe was being moved up to a room on the obstetrics floor since she’d be in the hospital at least overnight. The doctor explained the placenta previa meant part of the placenta was covering the opening of the cervix, which is why Blythe experienced bleeding. Since the placenta was only partially covering the opening, the doctor hoped that, as the uterus grew, the placenta would move higher, and the blockage would no longer be an issue.
If that happened naturally, Blythe would be able to resume normal activity. If it didn’t, he would insist on bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy.
“Bree?” Jace stood when he saw her get off the elevator again an hour later.
“I’m on my way to give blood.”
“How is she?”
“She’s being moved to a different floor so they can monitor her and the baby.” She looked around him into the waiting area.
“Did Tucker leave again?” Bree asked him.
“No. He’s outside.”
“You might as well go home. I mean, not home, but wherever you’re staying. Where are you staying?”
Jace had been staying with Billy and Renie. Now that Tucker was here, he didn’t know. He was sure it would be okay, but he wouldn’t want to impose. It might be better for them to get a hotel room close to the hospital.
“Is there any chance she’ll talk to me?”
“Not yet, and honestly, Jace, there isn’t any hurry. Why risk getting her worked up right now? Be patient. You’ll get your chance to clear this up.”
“Thanks. You’re being awfully nice to me.”
“Don’t get used to it,” she teased.
It was nice to see Bree smile. Nicer than he wanted to admit. What he wanted more than anything was to ask her to hug him. It sounded silly, even to him, but it had been too long since someone had.
As if she’d been beckoned, Lyric bounded up to them. “What’s the word?”
Bree filled her in on Blythe’s condition.
“Why aren’t you with her? Or Tucker? I saw him sulking out front.”
“She doesn’t want to see them,” Bree answered for him.
“Uh oh.”
“Yep,” answered Jace this time. “She thinks I’ve been lying to her.”
“About what?”
“She thinks I knew where Tucker was.”
“Did you?”
“No.”
“Okay, then. Blythe will believe you when you tell her yourself.”
Jace hoped she was right.
“Aren’t you supposed to be in Pueblo?” she asked.
“Yeah, I called Billy, and he withdrew my name.”
“What’s next?”
“Crested Butte, to train.”
“You gotta go, dude. Can’t be sittin’ around here. That was your agreement with Blythe.”
“I’m not leaving until I straighten things out with her.”
“Gotcha. So where are you and ol’ brood-monster stayin’?”
“I asked him the same question.” Bree sounded pissy again.
Lyric put her hand on her hip.“What did he say?”
Jace loved that Lyric handed Bree’s pissiness right back to her. Although, right now he needed them both in his corner, which meant they couldn’t be at odds with each other.
“We’ll get a room somewhere nearby. Not a big deal.”
“You can stay with us.”
Jace thought Bree’s eyes were going to pop out of her head.
“What?” Lyric saw Bree’s look, too.
“They cannot stay with us, Lyric, and before you make an offer like that, you should consider asking your roommate her opinion.”
“Oh jeez, Bree, lighten up. Don’t know ’bout this one here, but the other one will be your brother-in-law someday. Maybe you should start bein’ nicer to him.”
“It’s okay. A hote
l will be easier, and closer.”
“Maybe you oughta go stay with them, Bree, you’ll be closer.”
Jace anticipated that, any second, Bree would either storm off or tear into Lyric. But she didn’t. She laughed. Lyric had a way about her that Bree responded to. Jace should ask her to give him lessons. The more he was around her, the more he wanted Bree to like him.
Blythe needed rest, so Paige and Mark talked everyone into leaving. Everyone but Jace and Tucker, who they didn’t bother talking to.
Jace approached his brother, who was sitting on a bench by the hospital entrance. “Hey, man, let’s go find a place to stay.”
“I’m good.”
“They’re not gonna let you hang out on this bench all night. I’ve got some clothes at Billy and Renie’s. I can swing by there, get ’em, and then we can get somethin’ to eat.”
“You go on ahead.”
“Tucker, come on. She won’t see you.”
“Don’t care. I’m not leavin’.”
“First, you leave when you shouldn’t. Now, you won’t leave when you should.”
“Shut it, Jace.”
“She’s sleeping. When’s the last time you slept? Or ate?”
Tucker didn’t remember, and he didn’t care. He had to get back in to see Blythe. He had to tell her, make her understand. He left for her, to keep her safe. If he’d known she was pregnant, he might not have left. He couldn’t say for sure.
“Go, do whatever you need to do. I’m staying.”
“They won’t let you in to see her.”
“We’ll see.”
Renie was at the house when Jace got there. And she didn’t look happy.
“What? And before you answer that, every woman I’ve come in contact with today has yelled at me. If you’re gonna pile on more, save it. I guarantee you, I’ve already heard it.”
Renie walked over to the oven and pulled out a plate wrapped in foil. She set it down on the counter in front of Jace.
“What’s this?”
“Dinner.”
“Uh, thanks.”
Willow came running toward him, and waited for him to pick her up. When he did, she wrapped her little arms so tightly around his neck, he thought he’d choke.
“Thanks, baby girl,” he said, pulling his head back a little ways from hers. “You don’t know how much I needed that.”
Willow didn’t let go. He could swear she sensed his sadness and wanted to make him feel better.
Pretty soon she started babbling, but he could only make out every other word of what she was trying to tell him.
“Yes, baby girl. After your bath, you can try to talk Uncle Jace into reading you a story.”
“How did you get all that?”
“You get used to it.” She patted his hand. “You’ll get used to it, too.”
“I guess you haven’t heard.”
“I heard. Tucker’s back, and Blythe isn’t speaking to either of you.”
“What else have you heard?”
“That’s it, other than they’re keeping her overnight. I’ll go and see her in the morning.”
“Is that why you’re here instead of in Crested Butte?”
“Of course it is. She’s my best friend, Jace.”
He nodded.
“If it helps any, in the eighteen years Blythe and I have been friends, she’s sworn she’s never going to speak to me again at least once a year.”
“I doubt whatever she was mad at you for, is anywhere near as serious as this, though.”
“What Tucker did was serious, but nothing you did was. She’s strung out. She’ll listen to reason after she’s gotten some rest.”
“Will you help plead my case?”
“I heard Bree already did.”
“You haven’t missed much.”
“Best friend, remember?”
“You think she’ll realize she’s wrong about me?”
“I do.”
“Then there’s the issue of Tucker.” He shook his head. Much harder, but no less important. More important, in fact. “He’s her baby’s father.”
“There’s an easy solution.”
“Oh yeah? What is it?”
“It starts with you and Tucker telling her the truth about what happened on Thanksgiving. Both Thanksgivings. Tell her why Tucker left the way he did and what happened that makes him act the way he does.”
“He wants to tell her. In fact, I think he wanted to tell her before the accident. She told me they were on their way to ‘talk’ when it happened.”
“And for some reason, he decided to leave rather than talk to her after the accident.”
“He decided to leave because of the accident.”
“This is getting tiresome, Jace. The two of you need to let go of this secret. It’s ridiculous.”
Maybe Tucker could tell his part of the story, but Jace wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to talk about the role he played. Tucker didn’t even know Jace’s side of the story, and if he did, Tuck would never forgive him.
Renie walked over and rubbed his shoulders. “Jace, this isn’t like you. Whatever it is, get it out. Talk about it.”
“I wish I could.”
“We should go for a ride. It worked for me.”
Jace laughed. It had worked for her. The day he’d asked her to go for a ride and tell him everything she loved, and everything she didn’t, about Billy Patterson, was the day they both realized how much she loved him. It was also the day Jace realized she’d never love him the way she loved Billy.
“This is different.”
“It doesn’t matter how it’s different. It matters how it’s the same.”
“And how’s that?”
“There’s something going on with you that you’re keeping inside, not talking about, maybe not even acknowledging your feelings about. That’s the same.”
Everything she said was true. He doubted very much he’d ever be able to talk to anyone about it. Not even her.
Blythe was asleep when Tucker crept into her room. The nurse had just left, which meant he had at least an hour before anyone came to check on her again.
He hated to wake her, but they had to talk. He had to talk anyway, and she had to listen. He sat and watched her sleep. It wasn’t the first time he’d done this. The night they’d spent together, when they conceived the baby growing inside her, he’d watched her while she slept. She was as exhausted then as she was now. As strung out, too.
She hadn’t had much of a break between then and now. Pain, surgeries, pregnancy, almost losing the baby and, above all else, worry. The whole time, she also worried about him. He knew it as well as he knew his own name.
There was another thing he knew. She loved him. She was angry, and hurt, but she loved him.
She’d listen to him when she was ready. He didn’t need to do this tonight. He changed his mind about waking her. Instead, he’d let her sleep, get the rest she and the baby needed. He longed to rest his hand on the swell of her stomach, like he had when he first saw her. If he did that, though, she’d wake up.
For the last twelve hours, he’d been thinking about himself, not about her. He wanted to tell her, he wanted her to understand why he left, he wanted her to listen to him. But he hadn’t stopped to consider what she wanted.
He imagined that when he was gone, she’d wanted him to be there for her, to hold her and comfort her, but he hadn’t been here to do any of that.
“I love you, Blythe,” he whispered. “I love you so much. I’m going to show you how much.”
Tucker crept back out of the room as silently as he had come in.
Blythe had been holding her breath, waiting, waiting, waiting, to see what he’d do, what he’d say. He sat so quietly, for so long, she wasn’t sure why he came in. She hadn’t decided what she’d do if he tried to talk to her. She wanted to hear what he had to say. She prayed whatever it was would be enough that she could forgive him. That’s what she wanted more than anything—to forgive him. Sh
e wouldn’t make it easy on him, though. He didn’t deserve for it to be easy.
He said he loved her. That was almost enough by itself for her to forgive him. But she knew that, if she let him off that easy now, eventually she’d have to get answers. By then, he might not be willing to give them.
She had to stand her ground. He had to tell her why he left, and what happened in his past that made him leave all the time. He also had to promise her he’d never leave again, and he had to be convincing enough, when he did, that she believed him.
When Tucker came out of Blythe’s hospital room, Blythe’s father was waiting for him.
“Thought you left.”
“I’m back. Come with me,” he said, motioning toward the elevator. “Please,” he added when Tucker hesitated.
“Where are we going?”
“To the chapel. It’s on the second floor.”
“I’m not much of a praying man,” Tucker admitted.
“You will be today.”
There wasn’t anyone in the chapel when they went in.
“Have a seat,” Mark said, motioning to the pew. He walked around and sat in the pew in front of Tucker and rested his arm on the back of it.
“It’s clear to me that there’s more going on here than you being an asshole.”
Tucker shook his head and looked at the ceiling. “Depends on how you look at it, I guess.”
“Do you have anyone you can talk to?”
Did he? He had, all those years ago, but it hadn’t helped. Would it help now? Doubtful. And even if he thought it would, he wouldn’t know how to go about finding someone—assuming Mark was suggesting a shrink. “No,” he finally answered.
“Son, it’s obvious you care about my daughter. It’s also obvious that something happened in your past that is keeping you from moving forward with your future.”
“That about says it all.”
“So the question is, what are you going to do about it? From where I sit, you have two choices. You can be in my daughter’s life, and your child’s life, or you can run again.” Mark waited for Tucker to respond. When he didn’t, he continued. “Whatever decision you make, it’s gotta be one or the other. Blythe will not be able to handle you dropping in, and then dropping back out again.”
Kiss Me Cowboy (Cowboys of Crested Butte Book 3) Page 16
